Half a sandwich

[viking]

I recently took my mother, who is her late 80's and not in the best of mental health, to lunch. The place was a deli which features huge, over stuffed sandwiches. Not being able to eat the whole thing I ordered her a half a sandwich. What these people do is basically give you is much smaller bread size, which is then cut in half. My mom told the waiter she wanted a half a sandwich not a whole one, that was on her plate. The waiter tried patiently to explain that compared to the reular size, it was a half, but in two pieces. She insisted it was a whole sandwich, because two halves were on her plate, even though both halves were the size of half the original. (Hope I am explaining this ok).

Question to those who are married to an RW. Have you run across this type of issue (sandwich or otherwise)? Trying to explain a concept maybe not known in the FSU?

[Shadow]

I just do not understand that these places think that a half can be a smaller size whole sandwich.
Now what was the problem ? 

[Phil dAmore]

This sounds like an exercise in perception.  Perhaps you should have explained that the smaller sandwich was half the size of a normal sandwich, instead of just 'half a sandwich'.

It's like filling an 8 oz. glass with 4 oz. of water.. it's only half, but if you take that same 4 oz. of water and pour it into a 4 oz. glass.. well then you have a full glass of water.

And yes, I run into problems like this on a daily basis with Nina.  If I ever actually finish writing the book that chronicles my experiences living here it is likely  an entire chapter will be given over to just this subject.

[Misha]

Given that I have a healthy appetite, I would simply have eaten the other half of the sandwich. Problem solved. Mother happy, son happy, waiter happy, everybody happy LOL 

[viking]

Well Phil, I think I was too full from eating the two halves of the normal sandwish which was twice the size of her sandwich, of which she only ate half.

Golub, I did eat the other half which is why I needed Phil to better explain this whole thing, But that was just the half of it.  ???

[wxman]

Question. Was she able to eat was on her plate? If not, she had more than she could eat. Therefore she got a bargain for half a sandwich.

[viking]

wxman

She was only able to eat half . Took the remainder home. But we only paid for half a sandwich. So there was no bargain.

[Misha]

wxman

She was only able to eat half . Took the remainder home. But we only paid for half a sandwich. So there was no bargain.

That would have been my second option. These little quirks often come up with an intercultural marriage. It is important to defuse the situation. Explain to her that you are saving money by buying the full sandwich and taking the the half home. Or, often my wife and I will face a similar situation and compromise: we buy a full sandwich and split it when she is not hungry for a full serving.

[acrzybear]

Well Phil, I think I was too full from eating the two halves of the normal sandwish which was twice the size of her sandwich, of which she only ate half.

Golub, I did eat the other half which is why I needed Phil to better explain this whole thing, But that was just the half of it.  ???

So this whole situation revolves around her only eating quarter of a sandwich and you eating two halfs, which would be a whole sandwich and therefore the some total of sandwiches ordered would be three halves, did you pay the price for a whole sandwich plus half a sandwich or did you only have to pay for the two half sandwiches and the quarter sandwich that she ate?

 I have half a mind to continue, but I'll stop now  

  Yeah it's been one of those nights at work!!

[viking]

Give me strength!!!

The purpose here was to ask if those who are married came across situations where we (the AM) understand the concept but your RW does not. I am interested in hearing what lies ahead. I think some situations could be serious in nature but others humorous. Such as this sandwich.

[Kuna]

Give me strength!!!

The purpose here was to ask if those who are married came across situations where we (the AM) understand the concept but your RW does not. I am interested in hearing what lies ahead. I think some situations could be serious in nature but others humorous. Such as this sandwich.

I was waiting for that!  Viking... I noticed no one had understood your OP.

In short...  MANY things...  stuff that we think is common sense may very well be totally "foreign" to your future wife.

Examples I've found?

- Drunk isn't drunk unless you're falling over.  This is a bonus though because you can get drunk and if you don't fall over you're not drunk...  strange I know... but I'll work with it!
- Beer is OK because it's not "real alcohol".. but Vodka is bad.  However, you can drink vodka but you can't drink so much that you'll fall over... because then you will be drunk - and drunk is bad! 

Serious ones?

- Banking and explaining bank fees and differences between Internet banking costs, ATM withdrawals and over the counter transactions.  It took some explaining but we got there.
- Property... we're looking at a small acreage and will spend a considerable amount. I want to keep our current apartment as another rental but she thinks this is "strange".  Why not sell it and take less credit on the new property?
- Buying cars... New versus second hand... credit versus cash... leasing versus novated leases.
- Anything to do with credit
- Tax...  she knows the tax goes towards to public infrastructure so much but she can't believe we (Australians) tolerate so much tax.  She also found out we get tax relief when we have children so now she wants 3 children not two.  Less tax is better - apparently!
- Shopping and buying a weeks (or fortnights) worth of groceries in one outing. I know I/O had an issue with this.  I didn't initially but it's emerging. You'll probably also notice an almost pathalogical need to analyse Use By Dates on groceries... oh, and buying a 2 litre bottle of milk will always be debated if there is a one litre bottle in the shop's refrigerator.
- Oh, when it comes to shopping it doesn't seem to matter how early we get to a store we are almost always last to leave. At times the staff have had to come and find us and ask us to leave.  It seems there is no time limit on grocery shopping - and no how often we discuss making a list and trying to get out of the shops as quickly as possible we still seem to love 3 and 4 hour marathons!
- Cost versus benefit....  is it worth flying to another city for one night on a certain weekend or waiting for a few weekends when we could spend 4 or 5 days there?  Someone prefers we go NOW... "we can go back later for a longer visit if we want".  Someone else would prefer making it nice and planned and organised.  (This may have little to do with culture and more to do with personality though).
- Food...  you'll see from my Amazing Week thread that the concept with eating reasonable size meals is something I'm struggling with.  I am uncomfortable eating as much as I am being forced to eat - and nothing seems to change that.
- Serious.. but can be funny.  In Australia it CAN be dangerous walking in the bush.  We have MANY snakes.  It doesn't seem to matter how often I remind My Wife to look at the ground when she is bushwalking (and not up in the trees hoping to find a Koala) - she tends to go off tracks and into long grass and doesn't appreciate the real danger of snakes...  especially in long grass.

Viking... in short expect everything to take lots of explaining and expect to need every ounce of patience you hear about it here.  I've not found the process difficult but your post reminded me of many circular conversations I've been in with my wife.

I'm sure others can add to the list.

Kuna

[Son of Clyde]

We went out shopping last week but my wife did not understand the term 'crowded' so I had to say 'many people' instead.

She learned a new word. I was talking too much and she suddenly says:"Silence!"

[viking]

Kuna, thanks.

I am IM'ing my G/F almost daily and find that she goes shopping all the time. Food shopping. I go once a week unless I just need a small item like milk or ice cream. In looking to the future and the prospect that she comes here, I know that a fully stocked grocery store well within walking distance (not to mention a Russian doctor) might be a benefit.

I have tried to explain the banking/credit issues here to her. I think she grasps the basics, being involved in accouning.

And a few Coronas (my favorite beer) in the fridge will not pose a health hazard is good to know. But the Vodka in the freezer? Thank goodness she likes martinis!!

SOC

Yeah, I know. I often find I get a "?" when corresponding and then trying to find another word or expression to explain what I am saying. I once tried to explain the expression "it is not over till the fat lady sings" and after "why fat"?, "who is singing" ?, "why a lady"?, I gave up and just moved on.

[Kuna]

Viking...  Mine understood the concepts (finance degree and living in Germany helped) and setting up her first bank account was simple enough as we did it together...

I suggested she go to the city one day with mama and set up a bank account so we can "send money" easily in future (rather than western union) Mama can have a card in My Wife's name that she can use in Russian ATM's.

Well that required a MOUNTAIN of explanations and questions only because she wasnt' confident to go to the bank and set up a bank account alone...  "Kuna, I will wait for you... we will do together".

"Honey, I'm busy and it's easy.  I'm sure you can do it... just do exactly what we did last time".

I think there's a degree of trepidation because things can be very difficult when doing similar things in FSU but when I got home that night I was told, "YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SO WORRIED - IT WAS EASY!