New to this site

[Thunder6]

Hello, everyone I'm newly registered to this site. I am 34 years of age and employed in the public safety sector. I've never been married, not due to a lack of available women, just never been able to find the "right one". I have been thinking about FSU women for quite some time now and trying to weigh out the options of making an effort to start some serious relations with a lady on the other side of the world. I have been communicating with some ladies through several agencies, and I have had some favourable communications with a couple of ladies. I've always wanted to visit parts of the FSU, so when I take a trip, I would not consider it a complete loss to not find the right match.

I'm basically looking for resources, to communicate with people who have a common goal, information and networking / friendship. This certainly looks like the place to go for these resources. I'll be getting back to reading now 

[Misha]

Welcome! I see you are Canadian. I will give you one word of warning: it is important to keep in mind that Canada's immigration laws are quite different from those in the United States, Australia, and most other countries. We do not have a "fiance visa" and you can only sponsor a spouse or a common-law-partner. In order to successfully sponsor a spouse, you have to demonstrate that it is a legitimate and continuing relationship. In other words, you will have to document how you met, how much time you spent with her, how and where you married, etc....

[Thunder6]

Thanks for the welcome Misha. What is involved with documentation? I would suppose providing your passport to the government, reciepts, that sort of thing, as well as documentation pertaining to the actual marriage. How many visits would one have to make to FSU to make this a legit marriage in the government's eyes? I understood going into this process that there is NO WAY that my future lady would ever come to Canada before we are married, I'm just kind of interested to know your experiences from someone who is married to an FSU lady. I'm figuring this process could take several years... finding, visiting, continued correspondence, marriage, waiting for approval and so on. Would I be accurate in that assumption? I'm okay with that kind of time investment but I would like an accurate assessment before I make that committment.

[Misha]

Thanks for the welcome Misha. What is involved with documentation? I would suppose providing your passport to the government, reciepts, that sort of thing, as well as documentation pertaining to the actual marriage. How many visits would one have to make to FSU to make this a legit marriage in the government's eyes? I understood going into this process that there is NO WAY that my future lady would ever come to Canada before we are married, I'm just kind of interested to know your experiences from someone who is married to an FSU lady. I'm figuring this process could take several years... finding, visiting, continued correspondence, marriage, waiting for approval and so on. Would I be accurate in that assumption? I'm okay with that kind of time investment but I would like an accurate assessment before I make that committment.

You might want to visit the Citizenship and Immigration website for more information on how to sponsor a spouse: http://cic.gc.ca/english/immigrate/sponsor/spouse.asp.

The process is two-fold. You have to submit an application to sponsor a spouse, then your wife would have to apply for permanent residence. The odds of a woman getting a visitor visa to visit a male friend in Canada would be very small (I lucked out with my wife, but to this day I can't believe my good fortune ).

The time issue is a bit tricky. In the past, I used to hear that you should know each other for at least a year with plenty of face-to-face time and demonstrated communication and support when away from each other (receipts of phone bills, e-mails, etc....). I have heard of people getting through with less, but it all depends on the immigration officer reviewing your case. Being somewhat cautious, the more you can provide as proof of the legitimacy of your relationship, the better. Traveling once and spending a couple of weeks together would be a recipe for definite failure with CIC IMHO.

So, it should not take years. Once you have found the woman that you want to spend your life with, you might want to spend one year developing the relationship before applying for sponsorship and permanent residence. This usually takes 5-7 months to process in Moscow from what I have heard.

[Thunder6]

Thank you for this valuable information Misha. I have visited the website you mentioned, it was a little confusing for me, and your explanation definitely helps. It seems that the information presented (and perhaps the laws) are geared more towards immigrants sponsoring dependants to our country. It is very lucky that you were able to get a visitor visa for your wife. I have heard this is just about impossible. I was not thinking that one trip would be enough, besides, being apart from someone who you have feelings for would certainly be enough reason to make additional trips to visit. What I am reading from you is one year to develop the relationship, make the application and realistically, wait another 7 months for the approval to come through. So a total of about 2 years start to finish, provided I find someone I believe is compatible fairly soon.

Now can you tell me about the adjustment period for your wife, when she arrived in Canada? And maybe some pitfalls there? I know she will not be able to earn money for the household, and I'm okay with that. I'm actually okay with her staying home as long as she likes, and working only if she wishes to do so, at something that she likes to do. I'm starting to think this will be a very consuming process, that takes a lot of time and effort, maybe not what I thought it would be, but it's not deterring me in any way.

[Misha]

Now can you tell me about the adjustment period for your wife, when she arrived in Canada? And maybe some pitfalls there? I know she will not be able to earn money for the household, and I'm okay with that. I'm actually okay with her staying home as long as she likes, and working only if she wishes to do so, at something that she likes to do. I'm starting to think this will be a very consuming process, that takes a lot of time and effort, maybe not what I thought it would be, but it's not deterring me in any way.

My case was unique in that I spoke Russian and my wife spoke no English when she arrived. Culture shock is very difficult.

Canada has one advantage: new permanent residents are offered the opportunity to study English for free, usually 15-20 hours per week of class time. The courses are great. My wife can now have a basic conversation in English and has a part-time job: she works in an after-school program with kids. It took her close to two years to become fluent enough to get this job.

Yes, it is a very consuming process both in terms of time and energy. If you find the right person, then it is worth it of course. However, better to spend the time to establish a good relationship than to suffer afterward through a nasty divorce IMHO.

[Thunder6]

Yes Misha, I totally agree with what you are saying. I would rather have a relationship that is not bound for divorce, I can get that here in Canada without much work. I have communicated a little bit with some FSU ladies and they seem to be more family oriented and to be more about the family unit than their own personal accomplishments. Is this true? Or am I chasing a false dream here? My last Canadian GF was all about achieving the dream by herself... without any help from me, even though I have a decent job and everything she wanted already, all she had to do was commit to me. She had a child, which I was more than willing to accept as almost my own (he has a father who is in the picture, that I assured her I would not try to replace) Maybe I'm not finding women here in Canada that are free of baggage, but I'm thinking at my age, good luck!

The language barrier is pretty significant, but I would like to learn my partner's language/s and culture. I believe it is very important for any multicultural relationship to survive successfully there has to be components of both. And a healthy respect for the other's upbringing and circumstance.

I am aware that the English Second Language programs are excellent in this country, and am thankful for that.

[Misha]

Yes Misha, I totally agree with what you are saying. I would rather have a relationship that is not bound for divorce, I can get that here in Canada without much work. I have communicated a little bit with some FSU ladies and they seem to be more family oriented and to be more about the family unit than their own personal accomplishments. Is this true? Or am I chasing a false dream here?

Depends on the woman. Some are, some aren't. Not rushing and knowing what you want increase the odds of finding a woman with compatible goals and values. If you don't mind my asking, where did you find the women with whom you are communicating?

The language barrier is pretty significant, but I would like to learn my partner's language/s and culture. I believe it is very important for any multicultural relationship to survive successfully there has to be components of both. And a healthy respect for the other's upbringing and circumstance.

This is always a good idea. At the very least, knowing some Russian makes traveling in the FSU easier.

[Thunder6]

I have spoken to ladies on RWGlobe, Dating-World, Kiev Connections and the Maksim agency. Do you have some suggestions? I have heard various things about some of these agencies, and to be honest I have had problems with them all except Dating-World. Resolveable, but still...

I'm not planning on rushing into anything, I've been wary for 34 years and it has served me very well.

[Thunder6]

I should probably rephrase that... not spoken to, written to.

I have spoken to ladies from Lavalife, but I have since figured that deal out.

[Misha]

I have spoken to ladies on RWGlobe, Dating-World, Kiev Connections and the Maksim agency. Do you have some suggestions? I have heard various things about some of these agencies, and to be honest I have had problems with them all except Dating-World. Resolveable, but still...

I'm not planning on rushing into anything, I've been wary for 34 years and it has served me very well.

I used a Russian free dating site to meet my wife. Can't really comment on the other agencies or sites. One interesting thing that I have discovered is that the Russian equivalent of Facebook now features service in English. You might want to check it out: http://vkontakte.ru. Of course it is not meant as a dating site, but as a social networking site. However, if you meet women who share similar interests, who knows what may develop  

[Misha]

Wanting to offer better advice, I signed up to vkontakte.ru myself. You can do a search for people specifying age range and whether they are single and looking. It is a nice service. Keep in mind, that these women are not necessarily looking for foreign husbands. However, your goal at first should simply be to look for friends and contacts and get to know some Russian women first and then think about marriage IMHO.

[Thunder6]

Thanks Misha, I have signed up for the vkontakte.ru service.

I would like some thoughts as to the dating agencies I have been using. I read a lot of mixed information regarding these, and of course I do not wish to communicate with a "factory line interpreter"... I'm finding most free agencies aren't really free, once you sign up with them. I have no problem paying for the interpreters, but I would like to know who the scam agencies are. I will continue reading about this topic and hope to have some answers soon, thanks to this site.

I understand auto racing is not so much of a big sport in Ukraine and Russia... LOL.

[Misha]

Thanks Misha, I have signed up for the vkontakte.ru service.

I would like some thoughts as to the dating agencies I have been using. I read a lot of mixed information regarding these, and of course I do not wish to communicate with a "factory line interpreter"... I'm finding most free agencies aren't really free, once you sign up with them. I have no problem paying for the interpreters, but I would like to know who the scam agencies are. I will continue reading about this topic and hope to have some answers soon, thanks to this site.

The easiest solution is to find a woman who knows some English. Try out vkontakte and let us know how it works. Remember that it will be a numbers game: the more people you meet, the better the odds of finding the one.

I just discovered one good group for you in vkontakte: English speakers! They have more than 93,000 members who want to practice their English including many cute women

[Thunder6]

93,000 wow! I can handle those odds... I will let you know. In the meantime thanks Misha...

[Misha]

93,000 wow! I can handle those odds... I will let you know. In the meantime thanks Misha...

You're welcome! Always happy to help out a fellow Canadian 

[Vaughn]

Nice exchange here - I'd like to hear your impressions regarding Maksim's, Thunder. My wife
is from the city where they do business. We did not meet through them, but we personally
know a dozen or so married couples who did.  So Maksim has a positive track record, at least
from my own vantage point.

Maksim's will, however, attempt to sell you a package of services should you ever decide to
visit Yoshkar Ola. Please PM me if Y-O becomes a reality....we can put you in touch with
alternatives for housing and interpretive services if needed, at considerable savings without
sacrificing quality. I'm not here to undercut Maksim's as they are a capable provider of a
full range of services - but they have been known to demand the whole enchilada in order
to author the invitation letter (for example only). 

I am most impressed by your cool and calm approach to this adventure. Welcome to RWD.

[Thunder6]

Thank you Vaughn, I like to think I am going about my search in a calm and cool manner. I don't believe there is any other way to go about this, and be successful.

I liked the Maksim's agency, I had some very good experiences with the staff there until there was a staffing change. (this wasn't the only agency I had small problems with due to staff leaving) Things became a little confused for a while but in the end it did get worked out. I unfortunately was not connecting with some of the ladies I really wanted to, and the ones I was communicating with seemed a little reserved and cool. (perhaps this is my own fault, and this is the difference between ladies from Ukraine and Russia). I have since been concentrating on ladies from Ukraine, and seem to be having better luck (that is if they are real, and their intentions are what they have said). I was interested in going to Yoshkar-Ola, but I'm thinking now that I would like to make my first visit to the Ukraine. I will keep your very generous offer of helping me in the Yoshkar-Ola area in mind however. I am thankful to all of the members who have and will offer me advice. You have been through the journey and I'm sure it will help me with my own journey.

[Mars]

I just discovered one good group for you in vkontakte: English speakers! They have more than 93,000 members who want to practice their English including many cute women

Misha, I went to http://vkontakte.ru and even filled out my data.  It was related to what university you graduated from, etc.

I saw no search function, except to search for those born in a certain day, or month, etc.

Saw nothing resembling an English option as you mentioned in another post above, nor did I see anything about persons wanting to practice English.

What am I missing here?

[aerotranslate]

Misha, I went to http://vkontakte.ru and even filled out my data.  It was related to what university you graduated from, etc.

I saw no search function, except to search for those born in a certain day, or month, etc.

Saw nothing resembling an English option as you mentioned in another post above, nor did I see anything about persons wanting to practice English.

What am I missing here?

Hello there...
Just want to offer some help...
You need to be registered and sign in. You can find any group or club in the Groups area.
Here is where you find that English speaking club Misha told you about - http://vkontakte.ru/club714
Do you view your account in English or Russian? You can choose another language for your account somewhere in your profile... If you need help with that, just ask.