Divorce Demographics and Where to Look

[cojack]

I started this journey in search of the perfect lasting relationship.  I'm trying to steer clear of the mistakes made by others so I don't end up in the same failed marriage.  In doing so, I became curious about divorce demographics.  I found a list of sources:

UN Divorce Statistics
Wikipedia Divorce Demography
Something I want to avoid
FindTheData's Marriage Page
Just the 10 lowest divorce rate map because I was curious
I wanted american to foreigner statistics and this was the best I could find.

So from all the research and looking at it just from a numbers game and some simple googling, I've learned some important things:

• Urban dwellers seem to be 2-5 times more likely to divorce than their rural counterparts.
  
• Russian/Ukraine/Latvia/Estonia/Belarus seem to have divorce rates similar to the West.
  
• Latin catholic countries are less likely to divorce.
  
• Poland is very different from all it's neighbors.
  
• Mexico, despite having some of the most liberal divorce laws on the planet, has one of the lowest divorce rates.
  
• Countries I'd deem dangerous to live in generally have low divorce rates.
  
• Divorce on the whole is on the rise.
  
• Ukraine doesn't count divorce past the age of 50 in their last report and I'm not sure why.
  
• Balkan countries have a very low divorce rate.  My Serbian friend told me this 2 years ago, so I guess I should let her set me up.
  
• In countries with high divorce rates, marriages in the younger age demographics are dropping.
  
• In Ireland, divorce is mostly illegal.
  
• In general, muslim countries have outlawed divorce or it is socially very taboo.

[GQBlues]

cojack-

These silly statistics are a waste of time. I hope you're not basing any of your decision process on meaningless survey and statistics.

As an example, for the portion of the USCIS's report dealing with K-Visa marriages/divorces, they cited using the accounting of 'those who left the US border within the first year of their entry' as the number of divorce in these marriages to arrive to the conclusion that the success rate for these marriages then are in the 80 percentile.

That's an error. The departures they counted are in fact mostly Advance Parole recipients. They aren't leaving because the marriage didn't work. They are leaving for their programmed trips back home after getting hitched...

Moreover, the USCIS also cited successes absent of proper classification. What I mean is, K-visa countries have different attitude about divorce than others so you can't lump the 'total' number as representative for 'each' region. Some cultures divorce more easily than others.

Dan, the owner of this site, once did their own study and survey which they hailed to be a good statistical representation of this matter. I feel otherwise.

[mendeleyev]

Cojack, I understand the desire to study stats but traditional stats don't generally cover non-traditional/international marriages very well.

Instead of trying to read the tea leaves of other people's history, focus instead on things you can influence.

Communication is key, especially in cross-cultural marriages. Failure to reach a common understanding has got to be one of the reasons for divorce so make sure you learn as much as you can about her world view/cultural perspectives and make more than just a token attempt at bridging the language gap together instead of just expecting her to learn English and calling it a day.

[cojack]

I did some of this just as a source of my own research that I didn't find elsewhere.

From the USCIS article:

It is interesting to note that, based largely on data provided by the agencies themselves (along with the Commission on Filipinos Overseas report cited above), marriages arranged through these services would appear to have a lower divorce rate than the nation as a whole, fully 80 percent of these marriages having lasted over the years for which reports are available.

So you think it's better than 20 percent divorce rate?  Considering domestic divorces are past 50 (60?) percent, that is substantially better.  There are some other astounding statistics in that article, such as only 4 percent of foreigners looking actually find someone.

Some of the numbers are actually starting to explain what I'm seeing anecdotally, such as women in my age group just aren't wanting to marry or have children as often, especially if their parents are divorced.  I've also grown up with Brazilians that value family and end up in really great relationships where they work together really well to build a long lasting relationship.

I did some of it just to see as a preliminary investigation.  I rank a lot of countries where divorce laws are new or still illegal as much lower.  I'm not looking to get stuck in a cultural trap where the culture hasn't caught up with the laws.  I found some notability in Mexico, Columbia, and Brazil where divorce laws have been around for a few decades and the rates there are still very low.

However, you're right that it's not all about statistics.  I'm still going to take a lot of time getting to know someone before I decide to ask them for their hand in marriage.  I've escaped some really nasty types by following my personal rule of no kiss before the 3rd date.  I've only ever dated 2 foreign women before, so I'm definitely just starting out.

[cojack]

Communication is key, especially in cross-cultural marriages. Failure to reach a common understanding has got to be one of the reasons for divorce so make sure you learn as much as you can about her world view/cultural perspectives and make more than just a token attempt at bridging the language gap together instead of just expecting her to learn English and calling it a day.

I was the guy who was considering moving abroad, so learning their language would be the least I would be doing.

That is, unless she lives in Croatia.  That country sucks to drive through, and we'd have to move.   

[GQBlues]

These are subjective, cojack. It's akin to comparing divorce rates between the 10 city blocks in proximity of you and moving to one with the lowest rate with the mindset you'd like to marry a single woman living within that particular city block. Ignoring the possibility that those marriages happen to be by people who used to live in your old block and they just happened to move there after getting married.

If it helps, maybe look at your search in a way where you seek a 'woman' not a 'nationality'.

[Anotherkiwi]

So from all the research and looking at it just from a numbers game and some simple googling, I've learned some important things:

In Ireland, divorce is mostly illegal.

Wherever this came from, it's wrong.  Divorce has been legal in Ireland since 2006 - I know, because my brother and now sister-in-law had to wait more than ten years until then so that she and her first husband could get divorced.  Although they live in Ireland, she married my brother on a beach (very romantic setting!) here in Auckland in January 2007.

[Ade]

Wherever this came from, it's wrong.  Divorce has been legal in Ireland since 2006 - I know, because my brother and now sister-in-law had to wait more than ten years until then so that she and her first husband could get divorced.  Although they live in Ireland, she married my brother on a beach (very romantic setting!) here in Auckland in January 2007.

Actually laws came into effect in 1997 but divorce was only granted if the couple was separated for 4 of the preceding 5 years.

[Anotherkiwi]

Actually laws came into effect in 1997 but divorce was only granted if the couple was separated for 4 of the preceding 5 years.

I stand corrected.

[SANDRO43]

Par for the course for a country where the Catholic Church is a very strong presence.

In Italy, until 1970 the only way to rescind a marriage was separation - which left the former couple in a sort of limbo (the only costly recourse was a marriage annulment by the Sacra Rota, the Church's marriage court), then our divorce law was finally enacted with the proviso that the matter could be discussed before a judge only after 5 years of official separation - IINM, it's down to 3 now.

In 1974 the catholics staged a referendum to have the law repealed - 60% of our voters said No! to that last-ditch attempt to turn the clock back.

I appears that nowadays only 2 countries - the Philippines and Città del Vaticano - have no divorce legislation in effect.

[Gator]

I appears that nowadays only 2 countries - the Philippines and Città del Vaticano - have no divorce legislation in effect.

The Vatican  has married couples?  I thought the population consisted entirely of some brightly attired leaders, a horde of male scholars, some guards from Switzerland and the odd woman.

I once heard a story about an American vintner being named after the first woman brought in to the Vatican by the new pope at the time to be his cook.  However, I had too much wine at the time and can not remember enough of the story to find it in the Internet, even it were true.   

 

[tfcrew]

The Vatican  has married couples?

Good question.

The pop. of Vatican City is 839 [2013 wiki stat]

As of 31 December 2005, there were, apart from the Pope himself, 557 people with Vatican citizenship, while there were 246 residents in the state who did not have its citizenship.
Of the 557 citizens, 74% were clergy:
 

• 58 cardinals, resident in Rome, mostly outside the Vatican;
• 293 clergy, members of the Holy See's diplomatic missions, resident in other countries, and forming well over half the total of the citizens;
• 62 other clergy, working but not necessarily living in the Vatican.

The 101 members of the Papal Swiss Guard constituted ......

Probably among them are married guys. One has to be single to 'enlist'.