Greetings to everybody

[Irina-Rina]

Hello Everybody,
I am glad to introduce myself. I am Rina from Ukraine. I am here because I would like to learn about relationships with Russian women from those who are quite experienced in this area. You may not believe it, but this is my very first time in a forum- ever, so I am not sure how to start. Thank you.

[Faux Pas]

Welcome to RWD Rina!

You are doing fine so far. What is it exactly you are hoping to learn?

[JayH]

 

Just jump in and ask any question you like to !!

What does help if we know a little more about you--it will save you answering the same question repeatedly! 
That detail also directs answers more specifically to what is more relevant to you--or it should in theory !!

[Irina-Rina]

:-) Thank you. It feels great to get a response right away! :-) Well, to tell about myself, I must confess: I am a woman   LOL
More precisely  - a Russian speaking Ukrainian with partially Polish blood. A 100% Slavic woman. What interests me first of all is how do men and women manage to "sense" each other at a distance, just from translated correspondence? I have never had an experience of starting a personal relationship online (I mean without face to face communication) I have done lots of work-related online communication, but never tried to set up personal friendship this way. My precise question would be: how do you manage to find out that you are communicating with the right person if you can't see her/him?

[Faux Pas]

:-) Thank you. It feels great to get a response right away! :-) Well, to tell about myself, I must confess: I am a woman   LOL
More precisely  - a Russian speaking Ukrainian with partially Polish blood. A 100% Slavic woman. What interests me first of all is how do men and women manage to "sense" each other at a distance, just from translated correspondence? I have never had an experience of starting a personal relationship online (I mean without face to face communication) I have done lots of work-related online communication, but never tried to set up personal friendship this way. My precise question would be: how do you manage to find out that you are communicating with the right person if you can't see her/him?

My answer would be (and you're likely to get many conflicting answers) you don't. But, the communication has to start some where at some point, doesn't it? Besides with internet technology as it is, you can see and speak to the person without ever meeting them. It all starts from the initial contact, whatever that may be, email, telephone etc.. Then progress into a Skype or viber discussion. If there is still interest eventually into a meeting in person. Quite frankly, you can be very interested in someone through writing communications, telephone discussions then Skype and eventually find out after meeting in person you have no interest. It's all a gamble. There are no guarantees

[Irina-Rina]

This is very true: it is all a gamble, you never know. Well, I guess I'll have to accept that, taking that even in marriage, after decades of living together with a person who you seem to know like an open book, you still have that  "gamble feeling" sometimes. :-) 
Alrignt, thenmy other question is- is the experience of communicating with lots of online partners help to approach the goal? I mean, should I meet just a couple of people and try to develop something from there, or would it make sense to try it with a few dozens right away - you know, to get into the taste of the process? 

[fathertime]

More precisely  - a Russian speaking Ukrainian with partially Polish blood. A 100% Slavic woman. What interests me first of all is how do men and women manage to "sense" each other at a distance, just from translated correspondence? I have never had an experience of starting a personal relationship online (I mean without face to face communication) I have done lots of work-related online communication, but never tried to set up personal friendship this way. My precise question would be: how do you manage to find out that you are communicating with the right person if you can't see her/him?

I'd say the goal is to meet in person in relatively short order....Don't get TOO wrapped up in any relationship without  first meeting.   Guys can say practically anything, meeting in person will sort SOME of what they say out...but even then, just meeting once won't sort out everything....   


The whole process is a risk, so if you are going to get involved just keep that in mind.  Spending time together  as much as possible is obviously what you can strive for...although obviously that may be tough depending on personal circumstances.  Individuals have different thresholds as to how much risk they feel they need to mitigate....also having prior experiences in relationships, and a good sense of what YOU want is important.


Fathertime!   

[ML]

Rina, the typical advice we give to the men here is to . . . cast a wide net.  That is, contact a huge number of women who seem to meet most of your criteria regarding age range, height, weight, education, children (or not), English skills (or not), etc.  Then from the responses, begin to do some screening to eliminate those with obvious problems (for you).  Then send second message, and from responses screen some more out.  etc., etc.

I would advise women to follow the same procedure.

So try this for yourself.

If you are unsuccessful, then I will go on some dates with you . . . and will bring my wife along !

[Faux Pas]

This is very true: it is all a gamble, you never know. Well, I guess I'll have to accept that, taking that even in marriage, after decades of living together with a person who you seem to know like an open book, you still have that  "gamble feeling" sometimes. :-) 
Alrignt, thenmy other question is- is the experience of communicating with lots of online partners help to approach the goal? I mean, should I meet just a couple of people and try to develop something from there, or would it make sense to try it with a few dozens right away - you know, to get into the taste of the process?

My suggestion is to keep meeting men online until you find 1 or more that interests you to take it to the next level. It really doesn't matter if you meet and have 1 email pal, 10 or 20. Introduction online or through a dating site doesn't commit you in anyway to Skyping or telephone conversations with anyone. You move to the next level with anyone you feel that you want to move to the next level with.

In essence early in the stage you are only developing friendships that might progress into something more or might not. You need to remain open to the possibilities until you, yourself decide this person isn't for me and then stop. The desired level is meeting the men whom you are interested in personally and then see if it can progress into a real relationship that may or may not lead to a marriage.

[2tallbill]

What interests me first of all is how do men and women manage to "sense" each other at a distance, just from translated correspondence? I have never had an experience of starting a personal relationship online (I mean without face to face communication) I have done lots of work-related online communication, but never tried to set up personal friendship this way. My precise question would be: how do you manage to find out that you are communicating with the right person if you can't see her/him?

Welcome to the forum!

You've asked an excellent question, and the answer is that you are only pen pals
until you meet in person. I highly recommend that people don't get too excited
over beautiful photos and romantic letters. The reason for this is that unless you
have mutual chemistry all the flowery letters in the world have no meaning.

It's happened to me (more than once) that I wrote to a girl and talked to her on
Skype and when we met it wasn't going to work. I also recommend that guys get
on a plane as soon as possible to meet a girl face to face rather than waste time
writing more letters. My advice is to be always stay cautiously optimistic until you
meet in person and only then can you give away the key to your heart.

I give slightly different advice to women than I do to men. I advise women to
sign up at Elena's models (they have far more men than women) and to read
Elena's advice (written in Russian)

I have also seen some romances develop on the forums as well.

Udachi!

Bill

[Sous02]

I believe you can begin a relationship with letters. Especially if you enjoy writing. Of course you will need to meet in person and talk on Skype but writing can be a very intimate exchange. No I am not talking about sexuality but that can also be part of it. Each situation is different. There are lots of keyboard Romeo's who will occupy your time with letter after letter especially once the wife goes to bed. Be careful and suspicious but enjoy the experience.

[BillyB]

I am Rina from Ukraine.....this is my very first time in a forum- ever

Welcome to the forum Rina! But I must warn you. Half the men here are married and the other half are crazy!

[jone]

Welcome to the forum Rina! But I must warn you. Half the men here are married and the other half are crazy!

I thought that this was the same half???       

[Anotherkiwi]

  Rina!  I'm sure that you will be able to contribute in all sorts of ways.

One thing that puzzles me, however: your profile states that you have been married for over 10 years.  If so, why are you asking for the best way to find a new partner?  Does your husband know about this development in your marriage? 

[Sous02]

Who said she is looking for a new partner? Go back and read her original post.

[Anotherkiwi]

Who said she is looking for a new partner? Go back and read her original post.

I did.  It's not the first post that I'm querying, or even the second.  It's this one:

Alrignt, then my other question is- is the experience of communicating with lots of online partners help to approach the goal? I mean, should I meet just a couple of people and try to develop something from there, or would it make sense to try it with a few dozens right away - you know, to get into the taste of the process? 

A bit of clarification might come in handy, as to whether the "I" to whom she is referring is herself, or just a generic prospective explorer of these sometimes murky waters.

[Sous02]

You are assuming she is asking for her own personal life. Perhaps she is researching the topic? It is there. It is very interesting as her main question is about getting to know someone from writing letters. Yet most of us, myself included at the beginning, assumed she was looking for a date.

[2tallbill]

Nobody knows what she is referring to, or maybe she was married for longer than
10 years. I don't think we should assume too much when dealing with somebody
who isn't a native English speaker.

Who knows maybe she is just curious or doing research for an article or blog or
advising her sister or a friend.

So, I'll ask


Rina are you currently married? are you asking these questions for yourself or
someone else?

[Anotherkiwi]

So, I'll ask


Rina are you currently married? are you asking these questions for yourself or someone else?

That's what I said!

[LAman]

You are assuming she is asking for her own personal life. Perhaps she is researching the topic? It is there. It is very interesting as her main question is about getting to know someone from writing letters. Yet most of us, myself included at the beginning, assumed she was looking for a date.

Never did I think Rina was looking for a date, her question was about relationships between Russian women and people here( assuming international marriages). First thing I noticed was.............. married>10 years

Another post by Rina confused me...her using the word "I" in terms of being/getting into a long distance relationship.

[Irina-Rina]

My suggestion is to keep meeting men online until you find 1 or more that interests you to take it to the next level. It really doesn't matter if you meet and have 1 email pal, 10 or 20. Introduction online or through a dating site doesn't commit you in anyway to Skyping or telephone conversations with anyone. You move to the next level with anyone you feel that you want to move to the next level with.

In essence early in the stage you are only developing friendships that might progress into something more or might not. You need to remain open to the possibilities until you, yourself decide this person isn't for me and then stop. The desired level is meeting the men whom you are interested in personally and then see if it can progress into a real relationship that may or may not lead to a marriage.

thank you for the tips/ The process looks like a whole science with its theories and rules! 

[Muzh]

My precise question would be: how do you manage to find out that you are communicating with the right person if you can't see her/him?

Privet Ira 


How do you know?


It all depends on the characters. If a guy is looking at this as a business deal (you'll find quite a few) and the lady is looking for her soulmate, it is obvious that the communications will be strained. The opposite applies as we have seen some examples of those where the woman is doing the business transaction.


Then there are instances where both approach this as a business transaction and most of the time it works. But NFL. (Not For Long) Most of the time the woman leverages her bets and makes a merger somewhere else.


Then there are the foolish souls who will do everything opposite to the norms and end up in a long loving relationship. (Feel free to ask me about this.) 


To answer your question? You will know. Just trust your heart.