Scammed?

[MisterGee]

In Nov 2015 I joined Anastasiadate on their trial $4 membership. I looked for a girl who was not the pretiest who was a little heavy and who I felt would most likely be genuine since so many of the other girls look like models and the kind of women that would have an inbox filled with letters from men if they were on POF or Tinder here in the states. She was clever enough to tell me her email in a way that even got past the filters on Anastatias free chat, so I was like score I got an email now we can actually "talk". And every day from Nov thru Dec we would swap emails and talk and I told her I would even help her get her passport after she get her friends laptop so we could use skype. So we had an evening of skyping, she said she had to turn the sound off as her mother sleeps in the same room she is using. So after we waved goodbye I felt she might be trustworthy so I send her $230 US for her passport and something for a christmas gift.
Then she eventaully tells me her passport arrived, it is just after Christmas I am all like great please let me see a copy of it. When it arrives I see the expiration date is Feb 25 2025 and not JAN ## 2026 I also notice the issue date is missing, like the expiration date was cut and pasted over that field....

So I call her out on this BS of the passport expiration date being from Feb, she says its because she started her passport process earlier but did not have the money for the fee until I sent it...it sounded like BS to me but I don't know the system in Ukraine, maybe its backwards enough over there such things can happen.

I I tell my friend in Odessa what she told me and he is like total scam stop. So I tell her, look your passport is not right, it looks like you took my money for something else and she protests and says she will return my money but only has $50 right now etc etc....so I am like well if this woman is for real and being honest it it worth tossing out a possible future over $230...so I say look I can't send you any more money but if you are serious about meeting you can meet me when I travel to Odessa in the summer.

Now she lives in Izmail and from what I can tell there is no direct way to Izmail from Odessa except train and the trains are not so frequesnt (if I am wrong on this please school me) so I am wondering if it would be worth traveling to Izmail from Odessa while I am there (for 10 days I hope) in July/August or should I just swallow my pride and accept I have been scammed? We still email about once or twice a week, it is no longer daily, she says her home PC broke and she can only email me from work when it is not busy or she has time.

Thank you!

[alex330]

Consider it a cheap lesson in International Dating and move on.

[jone]

In Nov 2015 I joined Anastasiadate on their trial $4 membership. I looked for a girl who was not the pretiest who was a little heavy and who I felt would most likely be genuine since so many of the other girls look like models and the kind of women that would have an inbox filled with letters from men if they were on POF or Tinder here in the states. She was clever enough to tell me her email in a way that even got past the filters on Anastatias free chat, so I was like score I got an email now we can actually "talk". And every day from Nov thru Dec we would swap emails and talk and I told her I would even help her get her passport after she get her friends laptop so we could use skype. So we had an evening of skyping, she said she had to turn the sound off as her mother sleeps in the same room she is using. So after we waved goodbye I felt she might be trustworthy so I send her $230 US for her passport and something for a christmas gift.
Then she eventaully tells me her passport arrived, it is just after Christmas I am all like great please let me see a copy of it. When it arrives I see the expiration date is Feb 25 2025 and not JAN ## 2026 I also notice the issue date is missing, like the expiration date was cut and pasted over that field....

So I call her out on this BS of the passport expiration date being from Feb, she says its because she started her passport process earlier but did not have the money for the fee until I sent it...it sounded like BS to me but I don't know the system in Ukraine, maybe its backwards enough over there such things can happen.

I I tell my friend in Odessa what she told me and he is like total scam stop. So I tell her, look your passport is not right, it looks like you took my money for something else and she protests and says she will return my money but only has $50 right now etc etc....so I am like well if this woman is for real and being honest it it worth tossing out a possible future over $230...so I say look I can't send you any more money but if you are serious about meeting you can meet me when I travel to Odessa in the summer.

Now she lives in Izmail and from what I can tell there is no direct way to Izmail from Odessa except train and the trains are not so frequesnt (if I am wrong on this please school me) so I am wondering if it would be worth traveling to Izmail from Odessa while I am there (for 10 days I hope) in July/August or should I just swallow my pride and accept I have been scammed? We still email about once or twice a week, it is no longer daily, she says her home PC broke and she can only email me from work when it is not busy or she has time.

Thank you!

Difficult to say.  There are those on the forum who would immediately point fingers and say she is a scammer.  And that anyone who takes money from you is not into you. 

But the answer is somewhere in between.  There are many girls who wind up marrying a guy that they took money from.  If I lived in Ukraine, had little to no money whatsoever, I don't know what I would do to survive.  Would I belligerent about it?  Nah. Life is too short.

Do you like this woman? 

I will say one thing:  If you want a woman to be serious about you, get on a plane.  Don't hesitate.  Get on a plane. 

To have a long conversation with a woman will almost always lead to failure.  And if you don't have enough money or time to have an overseas relationship, the only one you're stroking is .... you.  Date locally. 

So, if you have money set aside for this endeavor, then go there and meet people.  If you don't stay home and save your money for a local girl. 

The likelihood of you finding someone on A-Date is remote.  And they are taking your money for everything.  So if it doesn't work out with this woman, go to a subscription site.  There you don't have to worry that she is trying to keep you online so you will spend more.

Udachi.

[HoundDaddyLee]

Welcome MrGee 


Alex is right, you paid for some tough love. My first question though, is why did she need the passport? Especially if you are visiting her? I would get on Elena's Models or some other subscription service and look for multiple women to visit on your trip.


Do a lot of reading here. There is much information here and you can learn from others mistakes and others successes.


Good Luck,
HDL

[Larry1]

I'm with Alex on this. Consider this a cheap lesson in international dating. 

And I highly recommend reading threads on the forum. They will teach you a lot about this search.

[Gator]

Maybe. 

She made very little money for the hours and hours of talking with you everyday in November and December.  So she is either honest or an incompetent scammer. 

I suggest you ask her to come to Odessa.  Tell her to use the $50 to buy a ticket, and when she shows you will rent her a room, and take her to a beachside restaurant for dinner and a club afterwards. 

[Boethius]

US$250 is about the average monthly wage in Ukraine.

Just FYI there are trains from Izmail to Odesa. It's about six hours by train, once a day, 80 Hryvnia.

[GatoMoon]

only idiot people send money without ever meeting!  you are one of them !!! 

TIRED OF MEN SENDING MONEY TO WOMEN !!  That's why it is getting harder for any genuine men looking for any genuine women!!!

[jone]

US$250 is about the average monthly wage in Ukraine.

Just FYI there are trains from Izmail to Odesa. It's about six hours by train, once a day, 80 Hryvnia.

How much is the train to Sevastopol from Odessa?

[dragonkid]

only idiot people send money without ever meeting!  you are one of them !!! 

TIRED OF MEN SENDING MONEY TO WOMEN !!  That's why it is getting harder for any genuine men looking for any genuine women!!!

We both know that even if they didn't send money, you will still struggle  I am with jone on this, some guys can persuade scammers to go legit, lots of women on any site are scammers till they meet the right guy.  Yet i won't recommend anyone to take the risk, not worth it. I feel it should only be done with someone who has really good success with fsu dating, has no problems with attracting women, but is lacking the quality of women he seeks on traditional sites, for example



maybe wealthy guys who want to play the money game would benefit from such sites, and have no problems burning money, or males that have a desire for highly attractive women,

[Morty]

Wrong thread. Bullocks I'm pissed tonight. This garage vodka is going to give me the toilet squats in the morning.

[BillyB]

Do you like this woman? 

I will say one thing:  If you want a woman to be serious about you, get on a plane.  Don't hesitate.  Get on a plane. 

If MisterGee likes getting lied to and robbed, he's going to love that woman. The woman asked for money when she didn't need it. She covered up the issue date to deceive MisterGee.

she protests and says she will return my money but only has $50 right now etc etc....so I am like well if this woman is for real and being honest it it worth tossing out a possible future over $230...so I say look I can't send you any more money but if you are serious about meeting you can meet me when I travel to Odessa in the summer.

You say she's a little heavy and not the prettiest but you got pussy on your mind to even think about living your entire life with her.

Welcome to the forum MisterGee. Don't even for one second believe that woman is honest by promising your money back. She is doing damage control. She wants to be nice now so you don't get her kicked out the agency. She needs to stay in the agency to help fools part with their money so she can make a good living.

If a woman really likes you, she wouldn't want to risk losing you by deceiving you. Don't be one of those suckers born every minute. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Find a good woman.

[Trenchcoat]

We both know that even if they didn't send money, you will still struggle  I am with jone on this, some guys can persuade scammers to go legit, lots of women on any site are scammers till they meet the right guy.  Yet i won't recommend anyone to take the risk, not worth it. I feel it should only be done with someone who has really good success with fsu dating, has no problems with attracting women, but is lacking the quality of women he seeks on traditional sites, for example



maybe wealthy guys who want to play the money game would benefit from such sites, and have no problems burning money, or males that have a desire for highly attractive women,

Too true, I think your right on this one DK, many girls on these dating sites, pay monthly included will scam guys that come up that are not that interested in as they don't really mean much to them it's a poor country and so that us there use to them. Once the right guy comes up then she may well go with him without scamming.

Cute girl there, but is she the ever smiling type even if she is not into the guy, lol.

I think BillyB is also right, it may have just been $250 but that is a lot of money out in the Ukraine. Writing a load of email didn't cost her much at all, she probably kept them shortish and who knows what other guys she was also trying to scam at the same time as OP. It's a business for many of these girls and of course there is the chubby chaser market to cater for

[JayH]

In Nov 2015 I joined Anastasiadate on their trial $4 membership. I looked for a girl who was not the pretiest who was a little heavy and who I felt would most likely be genuine since so many of the other girls look like models . She was clever enough to tell me her email in a way that even got past the filters on Anastatias free chat, so I was like score I got an email now we can actually "talk". And every day from Nov thru Dec we would swap emails and talk and I told her I would even help her get her passport after she get her friends laptop so we could use skype. So we had an evening of skyping, she said she had to turn the sound off as her mother sleeps in the same room she is using. So after we waved goodbye I felt she might be trustworthy so I send her $230 US for her passport and something for a christmas gift.

Now she lives in Izmail and from what I can tell there is no direct way to Izmail from Odessa except train and the trains are not so frequesnt (if I am wrong on this please school me)

Thank you!

First off--Izmail is a near enough 6 hour train ride from Odessa-- Bus marginally better,by car 3 1/2 hours.

Second-- how much did you pay the AD site in total? To point out the obvious-- doing video chat can easily run out to $60plus and hour.

Third-- you now call scam? On what you say was a gift?

Fourth-- the issues relating to use of computer is possible-and her explanations.

Fifth -- being non genuine is not confined to the "model" look profiles.

The fact that she did make direct contact with you is a huge plus and THE biggest hurdle to pass--it  has cost guys aa small fortune to get as far as you have.Exactly what it means- now that is still to be questioned.

The biggest issue for me-- is you !   Look at yourself,your appearance your circumstances .Stop thinking anyone will be desperate for your attention over their economic circumstances( as implied in your post).
Perhaps you should consider how you have come across on Skype?
Maybe it is as simple as she did not like you-- a characteristic most  of us agree on, is that fsuw will not suffer fools!  (without a reason)

[Trenchcoat]

Well just thinking if she's a chubber she probably spent all that money on food! 

Probably didn't intend too, lol.

Following on from what I put before from what DK was saying about girls just scamming guys that there not that into. Relates to my point I made recently about girls mid-late thirties seeming more serious. Generally I think once girls get into their thirties proper they start to worry about finding someone for real particularly if they don't have any kids yet. Before then even guys they like a little they may well scam as there's others to meet.

[BillyB]

Third-- you now call scam? On what you say was a gift?

Doesn't matter if MisterGee thinks he gave a gift, it wasn't a gift if the money wasn't used as intended. He was deceived and scammed. His lady said she had to get a passport and needed money for that purpose. She already had a passport. All ladies need to submit passports to agencies before signing up so the agencies abide by IMBRA rules. Americans are used to people not having passports so we assume that's the same everywhere. Isn't the same elsewhere so if a foreigner says he/she doesn't have a passport, most likely they're lying.

Relates to my point I made recently about girls mid-late thirties seeming more serious.
 

If a person was rotten when young, chances are they a rotten person when older. Those pro daters, GCG's, and gold diggers end up marrying a guy and continue to take. When it comes to age, maturity changes but the heart rarely changes.

[LAman]

Doesn't matter if MisterGee thinks he gave a gift, it wasn't a gift if the money wasn't used as intended. He was deceived and scammed. His lady said she had to get a passport and needed money for that purpose. She already had a passport. All ladies need to submit passports to agencies before signing up so the agencies abide by IMBRA rules. Americans are used to people not having passports so we assume that's the same everywhere. Isn't the same elsewhere so if a foreigner says he/she doesn't have a passport, most likely they're lying.

 

Different kinds of passports. Internal and international. Likely this girl applied for(renewal) international one. A few years back I paid ~$200 to get expedited passport renewal for a trip a girl and me were taking to Egypt. But I agree $250 is too much for regular processing. I still did not quite understand WHY the passport was needed.

BTW BillyB.....gifts are used in any manner one chooses and changing one's mind on how it can/would be used is irrelevant.

[Trenchcoat]

Doesn't matter if MisterGee thinks he gave a gift, it wasn't a gift if the money wasn't used as intended. He was deceived and scammed. His lady said she had to get a passport and needed money for that purpose. She already had a passport. All ladies need to submit passports to agencies before signing up so the agencies abide by IMBRA rules. Americans are used to people not having passports so we assume that's the same everywhere. Isn't the same elsewhere so if a foreigner says he/she doesn't have a passport, most likely they're lying.

If a person was rotten when young, chances are they a rotten person when older. Those pro daters, GCG's, and gold diggers end up marrying a guy and continue to take. When it comes to age, maturity changes but the heart rarely changes.

Good point the girl may just be the same but want to continue taking in a marriage.

I agree with the first point, many FSW these days have wised up to the clumsiness of a direct request for money from a stranger in that a). many men will knock it back (we hope!) and b). they get blacklisted from agencies and/or get put on scammer list sites (google them OP).

So now I think many FSW have gotten used to the 'create a situation which call for money she doesn't have and wait for the guy to offer'. Like I had with my girl who stated she needed to take on a second job as her father was retiring. I think that WM need to be aware of this evolution in scamming and walk at the first sign of it (or at least research if possible).

Its becoming the scammers favoured tactic I think, remember OP if she is a scammer like we suspect she could have many men on the rope. In fact if she was eager to cut the agency out it might even be so her local agency doesn't take their share of the scam money.

Main thing to remember OP is:

1). She doesn't need a passport, remember you are the rich WM you have the passport, she is the poor Ukrainian/Russian peasant girl there for a good rogering before she may qualify under your passport issuing criteria.

2). Send no money, if she needs any travel, pay for her and send her the tickets, trains, etc for her country can be purchased online from our country (US/UK) these days. Only pay for flights/hotels (more expensive stuff to her) once you have seen her in person (not skype) and really know her as far as you can. Remember, she always goes to you if she needs something paid for, you decide if you should it whether she is just out for a freebie, never give her the money. This is how I treated the girl I met and it helped save me from wasting more money and even then she was out for the freebies.   

[BillyB]

BTW BillyB.....gifts are used in any manner one chooses and changing one's mind on how it can/would be used is irrelevant.

So if I ask you to give a gift of $200 to my charity to feed children in Africa and I put 100% of that in my pocket to cover administration costs, are you okay with that? Most people aren't.

MisterGee's lady didn't ask for money to do whatever she wants with it. She made up a story like most scammers do. Grandmother is sick, no  cell phone communication because she doesn't have one,  etc.... They trick guys into giving money through deception saying it's for a good cause. If you don't think they did any wrong using deception to get men's money, then ADate isn't doing anything wrong using deception to get people's business.

[LAman]

So if I ask you to give a gift of $200 to my charity to feed children in Africa and I put 100% of that in my pocket to cover administration costs, are you okay with that? Most people aren't.

MisterGee's lady didn't ask for money to do whatever she wants with it. She made up a story like most scammers do. Grandmother is sick, no  cell phone communication because she doesn't have one,  etc.... They trick guys into giving money through deception saying it's for a good cause. If you don't think they did any wrong using deception to get men's money, then ADate isn't doing anything wrong using deception to get people's business.

Do you know the difference between a donation and a gift???

[2tallbill]

or should I just swallow my pride and accept

You've paid a few bucks in tuition to the school of hard knocks. You've managed to find
this forum which has a wealth of information that you can learn all about searching,
finding and winning the heart of an FSUW.

My advice is to read, read and then read some more. Here are some threads to start at

The Ten Commandments
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=1740.0

Pursuing FSUW 101
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0

The free web book
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?action=ezportal;sa=page;p=47


My story
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=3432.0

As you read these and other threads you will have questions. Use the search feature
or come back here and ask your questions in this thread.

[BillyB]

Do you know the difference between a donation and a gift???

What's the definition of synonym?

http://www.dictionary.com/browse/donation

Some guys here seem to imply the woman who received MisterGee's money is free to do anything she wishes for it. He gave her money for a passport and asked for evidence she got the passport. He shouldn't be surprised he was duped but being ignorant to the scams out there doesn't give people the right to rob him. Whether a person or company deceives others through false advertising, false stories, or holding a gun to their heads to separate those people from their money, it's still called stealing.

Don't give MisterGee or other newbies here the impression it's okay with what those women are doing and that it's okay to bring those women into their lives. The woman has probably robbed many men through deception working at ADate. The last thing we need is an idiot to bring her to this country because you guys think she didn't do anything wrong.

[ML]

I agree with the essence of what Billy is saying.  But, it is best to dichotomise into at least two situations to try to eliminate the 'waffling' some always like to do here.

1) With no prior discussion of specific needs, you give a gift of money to someone.  They are free to use the money any way they want, even if you are unhappy with their choice.  However, the recipient can be stupid in spending on something they know you disapprove of . . . because then it's likely they will get zero in the future.

2) A person tells you of a specific need they have for some money.  And this is something that you agree they need or should have.  In this case, it is a severe act of bad faith for the person to use the money for a distinctly different purpose.  Hopefully, you never again give this person anything.

[chooter]

Would you like to hear about my 2 FSU failures, and both of them was all about...money.

If you do go meet her remember what has been mentioned to you...freebies when you get there. They can get expensive, she goes away smiling and you go away with less money in your pockets and have nothing to show for it but her smiles.

[GatoMoon]

These women who aren't really interested in you, are them that asked for money, because they have nothing to lose.

My ex-girlfriends STARTED to ask me for money when I already knew that they weren't interested in me romantically anymore.....