Flash Plan: 1 week in St. Petersburg in September

[rwdartie]

Hello,

First-time poster sometimes reader. I didn't plan much for the upcoming visit. I will stay at the center of the city, from what I've read, close to many destinations. The purpose of the visit is women, naturally (and minor foodie/drink hunting). I will visit from 9/8-9/15. I will meet one woman. We planned an evening at the theater. The woman I'm meeting is 30. She and other Ru/Ukr women I've dated say I make them feel comfortable and attractive. Nice woman but not really feeling the connection.  I was hoping for any suggestions, ideas, comments on how and possibly where to meet RW in St. Pete.? Brief background: I'm 50, good shape, 5'10" 180 lbs. I workout 3-4/week. The target is women 29-35 yrs.  Goal: meet a woman who wants children (2-3) a serious relationship and willing to relocate to the USA. Thank you in advance. I also thought it would make for an interesting post for those who prefer an impromptu approach. ))

[LAman]

My first inclination is why not spend the week with the one women your meeting. Spend some time with her and see where it goes. If you don't feel comfortable or she doesn't show up or don't want to see her again, spend your time seeing the city, quite interesting and beautiful. If you have any questions about St Pitre, join Trip Advisor ( St Pete forum), you will have any questions about the city answered by people that live there or frequently visit.

If you were going to Moscow, I have friends there that would keep you busy meeting Moscovites (the pretty ones).

If you are able to PM me, I might have someone in St Pete's that may be able to help you (if needed).

[Anotherkiwi]

It took you more than five years from registering as a member to making your first post?  That's more patience than any fisherman I've ever heard of!

Anyway,  to the ranks of the posters.

With that sort of age gap, there will always be a ton of extra questions, such as:

Have either of you been married before (and how many times)?
Do either of you have any children?  If so, are yours all younger than this woman you're visiting?

Etc, etc, etc.

Note that these aren't answers we need to know, although they may come in useful, but they're certainly things which you have to clarify totally with whoever you visit.  As LAman says, St Petersburg is beautiful - I won't go on about it again, except to say that it's the most beautiful city in the world. 

Good luck with your visit - you're certainly travelling at a good time of the year.

[BillyB]

Welcome to the forum rwdartie. When you meet or say goodbye to the woman each day, give her a kiss on the cheek. Offer your arm when walking down the street.

[rwdartie]

Thank you gentlemen for responding. I appreciate it. 

LAman
Nah, I won't spend the whole time with this one gal but hell, you never know right? I could very well be dancing with her to Hank's "move it on over" 'till the early morning. I'll likely spend 2 to 3 days with her but definitely want to spend time on my own, see the sights and introduce myself at coffee shops , the local gym or a yoga class. I don't have any children and neither does this woman. I tend to stay away from women with children. Of course, it's an entirely different challenge. Nonetheless, I prefer a 30 something gal who doesn't mind the age difference. 15-20yrs is certainly a big difference but it can work given the right people, timing, and other subtle factors.

Anotherkiwi
I didn't post earlier due to having several relationships that kept my nose and eyes focused on the GFs. ))

BillyB
Great reminder. I won't forget it.

[Trenchcoat]

Your trip could be handy experience to hear about for me rwdartie, I am planning a trip to St. Petersburg also but much later than you, at least three months or so. I had a similar trip to yours but in Kiev, visited Theatre with girl on a visit one, but unfortunately the affection from her was just not there. We got on great though and really enjoyed our few days there (well as far as I know she did) and her company. Thing is though that in terms of meeting other women I was screwed since I was with her all the time, rather hoping she would come around but she never quite did (it was about four days with her as I recall). Some say it can take some girls a real while to warm up, though others there might not be the interest there anyway. I didn't mind too much as for a first outing I would have probably been lost a bit in Kiev (different culture) and not have seen much or met other women anyway.

Point being is that if you stick with woman where there is no real connection/chemistry (I assume you've skyped) you could be doing yourself a diservice in finding another woman. That said with just one week out there and all the way from the US do you want to enjoy your time there seeing St.Pete's or spend time trying to line up other dates - its the dilemma I had in my last trip to Odessa/Nikolaev last month. Ok, if you just want to keep it casual but it probably won't turn up a woman. That said if you can do Pick Up Artist (PUA) on the hoof then you might do ok. St. Pete is probably a better place than Nikolaev to pick up women anyway, less 'dating industry'. Many women do Yoga in the FSU is what I have noticed so not bad idea, but finding somewhere might be a bit more tricky for a one off session for a (I assume) non-Russian Speaker. That's my thoughts anyway.

Let us know how you get on.

[2tallbill]

Thank you gentlemen for responding. I appreciate it. 

LAman
Nah, I won't spend the whole time with this one gal but hell, you never know right? I could very well be dancing with her to Hank's "move it on over" 'till the early morning. I'll likely spend 2 to 3 days with her but definitely want to spend time on my own, see the sights and introduce myself at coffee shops , the local gym or a yoga class. I don't have any children and neither does this woman. I tend to stay away from women with children. Of course, it's an entirely different challenge. Nonetheless, I prefer a 30 something gal who doesn't mind the age difference. 15-20yrs is certainly a big difference but it can work given the right people, timing, and other subtle factors.

Anotherkiwi
I didn't post earlier due to having several relationships that kept my nose and eyes focused on the GFs. ))

You should be back by now, how did it go?

Hank wrote the move it on over song but I like George Thorogood's version best.

[rwdartie]

Howdy All,

Just walked in the door from California. I not only went to Russia but spent considerable time in Deutschland and when I returned, I had to jet out to CA. So, after a month, I am finally back home. Thank god. ))

Let me begin by saying Spb is a Helluva City! It's beautiful and fascinating at the same time. Everything pretty much works. The metro was a breeze. The weather was fantastic. The people were friendly. They tend to overdress the "cold climate" in St. Pete. I walked around in a t-shirt when they wore coats. Perhaps they knew something I didn't. ))  Spb is not particularly expensive. Some places were inexpensive while other's were the same as back home.  It's also true about the abundance of what looks like single women. They appeared to be everywhere or my mind was telling me many of the women were very cute.  My jaw dropped a few times and had to do a double-look a few times. The theater is a great place to take a woman and also perhaps to meet. Ideally, you want to see a show that is mostly supported by locals and that means not necessarily the Tchaikovsky ballets. I notice a big difference between the Touristy Sleeping Beauty and a Vampire musical show. The Vampire show crowd was far far better looking and local. The Sleeping Beauty crowd had buses parked in front of the Mikhailovsky. Nevsky Prospect also looks like a decent place to meet people. There were girls everywhere having coffee or a drink with their friends (no dudes).

I had 3 dates when I was there. 2 with pen-pals and 1 with a woman I have been chatting with for some time. The 2 pen-pals dates were also out of curiosity from both parties. We both wanted to know if sparks would ignite. They didn't but had a great time with each of them nonetheless.  It helps to have some irons in the fire but it is certainly possible to meet women without setting anything up ahead of time. However, it will likely take more time than a week and you would have to know where to go, away from tourist spots and where the locals hangout. I did meet one girl at a coffee shop where we had a pleasant but brief conversation. 

I had originally planned to visit for only 4 days but a friend convinced me to stay for 8 days. Great decision. I hadn't walked so much in decades.  The girl who I met there traveled 24 hrs by train to meet me in Spb.  I had no idea until she told me in-person. Of course, this impressed me.  Our personalities are the opposite of each other. She's an introvert and I'm an extrovert. This is why I wondered if it would be worth the effort. After learning about her travels, I felt obliged to please her. After the first day, I no longer felt obliged. I simply wanted to be with her. She was no push over. Every time I tried to kiss her, she turned away. She didn't even let me kiss her hand, and it took a bit of persistence to wrap my arm around her.  She kept her distance but showed interest with smiles and laughter.

A month before, she told me what she wanted to do in Spb in a tone that she was wearing the pants. I thought I had to let her know it would be a decision we both make, but I having a bit more control. She wanted to visit the museums, the theaters, the churches, Peterhof, Pushkin and on and on. I told her NO, "I ain't spending my time walking and standing all day". I'm the type that likes to meet people, where she's much more into museums. Furthermore, we got off to a bad start when we finally met each other for the first time. She was over an hour late. When we met at the metro I only received a tepid hug. I didn't know until later she was staying with a friend who lived in the outskirts, would take a bus to the metro then take it all the way to the center of town. The heat dissipated after we sat down at a cafe and planned out our day. After learning all she did to meet me, I decided to please her desires and follow the cultural tour. Then, after the first day, it flipped, I simply wanted her to be with me and that I would enjoy myself and get great satisfaction in pleasing her (and myself). We had a fantastic time. We went to the theater twice. We got buzzed a couple of times. We went to Peterhof, to Pushkin and walked what felt like a million miles of parks.  The theater was particularly joyful. She enjoyed dressing up, looking very attractive, long legs and heels, standing over 5'10". She couldn't stop smiling.

But I also have to say my experience in Germany was great as well, an interesting destination for possible serious relationships as well. I stayed at a friends house most of the time but the few times I went solo, I did notice how friendly and interested some girls were. Europe, in general, is also an interesting place to consider your search. Germany has beautiful women as well. It felt as if my western USA approach had an attraction. At least these were my impressions/opinions. 

[BillyB]

They tend to overdress the "cold climate" in St. Pete. I walked around in a t-shirt when they wore coats. Perhaps they knew something I didn't. )) 

Most people in the FSU have something against the cold. Many do not put ice in their drinks thinking it'll make them ill. Many don't use air condition thinking it'll make them ill. The ladies I've dated many times thought I underdressed. My MIL will walk out of the house and use and umbrella on a rainy day to get to the car. She thinks I'm crazy for not using an umbrella. I tell her "I sometimes work a full day in the rain. A few seconds of it isn't going to kill me."

So... you and the lady a thing now? You going back to visit her in her hometown?

[ML]

So... you and the lady a thing now? You going back to visit her in her hometown?

Are you serious Billy;  without a hug or kiss ?

[ML]

Yes, on the one hand it sounds really great (for her interest in you) that it took her 24 hours to get to SpB and that she traveled a lot each day to get to you.

But, on the other hand, assuming you paid for all her travel and all other expenses, it was probably well worth the travel time to her to get to do and see a lot of things that she many never have been able to do on her own.

So it depends on these variables whether this was just a joy trip for the gal, or whether she is genuine while being ultra conservative.

Myself, I wouldn't continue with an ultra conservative type in the affection department, because this could very well continue after marriage.

[Faux Pas]

Yes, on the one hand it sounds really great (for her interest in you) that it took her 24 hours to get to SpB and that she traveled a lot each day to get to you.

But, on the other hand, assuming you paid for all her travel and all other expenses, it was probably well worth the travel time to her to get to do and see a lot of things that she many never have been able to do on her own.

So it depends on these variables whether this was just a joy trip for the gal, or whether she is genuine while being ultra conservative.

Myself, I wouldn't continue with an ultra conservative type in the affection department, because this could very well continue after marriage.

There's no telling at the wonderful women and mind blowing sex you missed out on clinging with a death grip to every slut that would pay you some attention is there? 

rwdartie - Good going. Sounds like you had a good time. Never mind some of the asshat advice that gets doled out here. It was quite impressive that she traveled 24 hours to meet you. Meeting for the 1st time in a different city is not all uncommon. Should you have been a bust she wouldn't had to put up with the nosey family and neighbors over the ordeal.

Regardless, sounds like she was into you. It's not mandatory that she fall to the floor with her legs in the air upon first sight of you. It's boy meets girl and the game must be played for many women who are worth it.

[BillyB]

Are you serious Billy;  without a hug or kiss ?

He said they both had a fantastic time and wanted to spend his time with only her. He mentioned he got a hug first meeting. He didn't disclose of he did or didn't get a kiss at a later time.

[Trenchcoat]

It's not mandatory that she fall to the floor with her legs in the air upon first sight of you.

It should be

[Trenchcoat]

Thanks RW for getting back to us, nice knowing how you got on, some just ask advice here then never let you know how they got on. Woman sounds a bit like the first girl I met in Kiev earlier in the year back in March. She too traveled a long way by trian, about 20 hours, though I paid as to me the £30 or so for the journey there and back was nothing. Apparently, FSU people enjoy these long train journeys and socialize a lot on them - strange lot. We too went to the Theatre, Opera, Orchestra, etc. and while I am not a theatre goer it was a blast so made a pleasant change to see something different.

My girl too smiles a lot and we both seemed to enjoy are time together, but unfortunately I'm don't think the chemistry was quite there, close but not quite. The hug is virtually a mandatory greeting in the FSU, even a kiss on the cheek. For formal kisses and holding each other though for me like yourself there was none I never really tried to kiss her or hold her as didnt sense the interest in that was there from her, perhaps with hindsight I should off. Some advice on this goes that if no initial sign on this wait a couple of days roughly then try, then she can be more open to it and I thin with the girl I was with this might have been the best approach. Probably still a no-go though.

Other advice is if your looking for a serious relationship out of it is go tight on the entertainment and eats/drinks as otherwise the women will see you as easy prey to be taken for what she can get (even though it costs hardly anything to us, they don't know that, lol). So yeah from the off 'treat her mean, keep her keen' - saying exists for a reason I guess So I think I stuffed up there as I was too generous with my girl. Sounds though if you couldn't get a kiss or affection from her then its probably a no go and worth trying another girl. 

[Anotherkiwi]

...She too traveled a long way by trian, about 20 hours, though I paid as to me the £30 or so for the journey there and back was nothing.

How many times have you been told that the man is expected to pay for EVERYTHING when he meets a woman in the FSU?  If the woman is happy to pay for some (or even all) of her expenses, great - but don't EVER expect it.

Other advice is if your looking for a serious relationship out of it is go tight on the entertainment and eats/drinks as otherwise the women will see you as easy prey to be taken for what she can get (even though it costs hardly anything to us, they don't know that, lol). So yeah from the off 'treat her mean, keep her keen' - saying exists for a reason I guess So I think I stuffed up there as I was too generous with my girl.

Finding a balance between flashing your wallet and disturbing the moths can sometimes be difficult.  However, even after your trip, and all the advice from posters who've "been there, done that, got the T-shirt," you're still the epitome of what FSU women call a "greedy" man.  Most of the Americans here would simply call you a cheap bastard.  If you persist in this attitude that all the women you meet are only looking to scam you, that's all you will ever find.  Why not just stop now and save yourself all the grief? 

[HoundDaddyLee]

How many times have you been told that the man is expected to pay for EVERYTHING when he meets a woman in the FSU?  If the woman is happy to pay for some (or even all) of her expenses, great - but don't EVER expect it.

Finding a balance between flashing your wallet and disturbing the moths can sometimes be difficult.  However, even after your trip, and all the advice from posters who've "been there, done that, got the T-shirt," you're still the epitome of what FSU women call a "greedy" man.  Most of the Americans here would simply call you a cheap bastard.  If you persist in this attitude that all the women you meet are only looking to scam you, that's all you will ever find.  Why not just stop now and save yourself all the grief? 

+1 Good words Kiwi. Plus with the exchange rates paying for everything wouldn't even disturb the moths. 


Trench, you need to stop worrying about getting scammed and just spend time finding a quality woman. Which is pretty much what everyone has been telling you. You are lucky to be living a short plane flight away from Eastern Europe. Take advantage of it.


HDL

[Trenchcoat]

Our personalities are the opposite of each other. She's an introvert and I'm an extrovert. This is why I wondered if it would be worth the effort.

A month before, she told me what she wanted to do in Spb in a tone that she was wearing the pants. I thought I had to let her know it would be a decision we both make, but I having a bit more control. She wanted to visit the museums, the theaters, the churches, Peterhof, Pushkin and on and on. I told her NO, "I ain't spending my time walking and standing all day". I'm the type that likes to meet people, where she's much more into museums.

Sometimes, opposites attract other times not so, sometimes those with similar personalities or interests don't get on that well I've found. Too much to the extreme either way can get a bit much I think, when I was younger my mother used to drag us all relentlessly around one museum to the next on holiday, day after day that you'd think nothing else ever existed - we got fed up of it, she not so even after visiting them all. On the other hand someone who just wants to talk relentlessly to other people for hours and hours can be equally as tedious - normally when we went to meet grandparents on my father's side. If the other person(s) just ends sat there listening to the the person they are with rattling on without stop to someone else it gets real unexciting for them just endlessly waiting for the other person to finish and move on to something else, hopefully. I find FSU women often like to act like they are wearing the pants beforehand also, but perhpas not so after  

[msmob]

I find FSU women often like to act like they are wearing the pants beforehand also, but perhaps not so after

This may be your problem, Trench..  Normally - before meeting - most ladies are only too happy to help a guy - not bossy - and if they are 'in' to you - that will continue. They will try to protect you from being cheated

[jone]

+1 Good words Kiwi. Plus with the exchange rates paying for everything wouldn't even disturb the moths. 


Trench, you need to stop worrying about getting scammed and just spend time finding a quality woman. Which is pretty much what everyone has been telling you. You are lucky to be living a short plane flight away from Eastern Europe. Take advantage of it.


HDL

Dman, man,

Surely you know this woman is just working you over for your servicing of her.  She is not into you, HDL, at all.  She just wants you for a sex toy.  I think she should be paying for you.

[HoundDaddyLee]

Dman, man,

Surely you know this woman is just working you over for your servicing of her.  She is not into you, HDL, at all.  She just wants you for a sex toy.  I think she should be paying for you.

Maybe I have a new career as a Gigolo in the FSU?  [size=78%] [/size]

[jone]

Why go to the FSU, HDL?

I hear Hillary has a job opening.

[Bounder]

I never really tried to kiss her or hold her as didnt sense the interest in that was there from her, perhaps with hindsight I should off.

Other advice is if your looking for a serious relationship out of it is go tight on the entertainment and eats/drinks as otherwise the women will see you as easy prey to be taken for what she can get (even though it costs hardly anything to us, they don't know that, lol). So yeah from the off 'treat her mean, keep her keen' - saying exists for a reason I guess So I think I stuffed up there as I was too generous with my girl. Sounds though if you couldn't get a kiss or affection from her then its probably a no go and worth trying another girl.

Hi Trenchcoat - I really don't want to be petty, but I do have a few grammar pet peeves that I find difficult to stay quiet about  And, you do this over and over and over: It is not "I should off," nor even "I should of," it is "I should've" from "I should have".   OK, now we can move on.

From some of your comments, I get the sense you enjoy being the man with the money.  If you find a good girl, she is not going to be looking to take advantage of you the moment you open your wallet.  Being a stingy tightwad is not a recipe for success with these or any women.  I don't think you give these girls enough credit; they aren't as dim as you seem to think and are certainly capable of calculating that that really expensive (to them) meal or whatever is peanuts to you.