Documents for the child

[Sohkay]

I would like to draw on the collective experience of the community and get your input. It's about children and the K-1 process.

The situation...Biological father, now ex- husband has moved to another country and remarried. He has provided $0 of support. Absolutely none....nada. He has rarely even called this 9 year old child during the three years he's been remarried, let alone even visiting. An American immigration attorney (familiar to many in our RW community) has advised us to work through the Ukrainian legal system and obtain a document, signed and certified by a judge, that terminates the bio father's parental rights.

Methinks that if we sought a signature from the bio father, it might come with a hefty price tag, knowing what I know about him.

Has anyone else had experience with this process?

Thanks in advance.

[Vaughn]

Sohkay,

 An acquaintance of mine, whom I'll call "D" went through this same
scenario in 2004. He's given me permission to paste this
2 year old post of his from another group. Often these
types of threads evolve into ones of morality - for the
record, I pass no judgement on a couple going this route.
I wish you luck and keen discernment regarding this sensitive
issue....

*****

Yes, There are only 3 ways in Ukraine to bring over children, if
you don't do one of these 3 ways, the Embassy in Ukraine will deny
the child to come over. 1. If Father of child is living...He MUST
come to interview with the fiance' to give his verbal, and written
permission to allow his child to come to America. 2. Bring Death
certificate of father of the child to fiance' interview. 3. Bring
declaration by the court giving "sole" custody of child to the
mother also stripping the father of all parental rights to the child.
We chose number 3 because my fiance' said the father even
though he had never met his 9yr. old son, or even cared to could NOT be trusted to give his permission, or if He would agree to... upon finding out a foreign man (American) was wanting to take his child to America would want a bribe paid to him from $5,000 up because all Americans are rich. My Fiance' said even if He would agree .... He couldn't be trusted to come to the interview, and if you counted on him coming and he didn't show, or he couldn't be found.....GAME OVER,
NO VISA for child. Too much to gamble, so I paid $1,000 for a
Ukraine attorney and got the "sole" custody... my fiance' even met
with her ex-husband and told him she wanted "sole" custody of their
son, and afterwards he would no longer have to pay his $3.00 a month support for the child. He never asked why, He just said "Ok" and signed the court document. She never told him I was involved, or her plan to come to America. We lucked out, it can be really messy if the father cared, and was involved in his child's life.

[Sohkay]

Vaughn,
Thanks for the prompt response. I had this question when I read your post. Your friend wrote, "NO VISA for child. Too much to gamble, so I paid $1,000 for a
Ukraine attorney and got the "sole" custody... "

OK, fine. I understand.

This is what I don't understand..."my fiance' even met
with her ex-husband and told him she wanted "sole" custody of their
son, and afterwards he would no longer have to pay his $3.00 a month support for the child. He never asked why, He just said "Ok" and signed the court document."

She had him sign an additional document? Or was this part of the parental rights termination documents? As I understand, and correct me if I'm wrong, the parental rights termination documents require no participation on the part of the bio-father.

Very nice avatar photo, by the way.

[Vaughn]

Thanks about the photo. We were still young lovers at 51 and 38.

 I have no personal experience in this area, as we brought over
my stepdaughter from Russia with her Dad's eventual knowledge and blessing, he even signed a court agreement allowing her exit. As for "D", his wife's ex was local - perhaps some effort must be made to petition the biological father. Since, in your case, he's out of the country, my understanding is that sole custody is usually granted without question to the supporting parent. There are more qualified participants on this board who can speak to this in greater depth and detail - and they'll show up eventually...

[Sohkay]

Please, still think of yourselves as young lovers...you are what you think.

Thanks for the input.

[Vaughn]

My 33-year old nephew recommends I get cardiac therapy!

I reread D's post, and offer this possibility - that since
Dad was complying with a divorce settlement by paying
child support monthly, she was required to at least inform
him of her sole custody wish. I do recall another case
where the sponsor asserted that an effort must be made to
at least contact the father, but that the father had a brief
time limit in which to respond - or lose his rights automatically.

C'mon, group - do we have any stepfathers of Ukrainian
children out there who've done this?

[Sohkay]

Thanks Vaughn.

[Wayne]

I do not know if the US Embassy in Kyiv will still do this, but for Svetlana, they accepted a permission letter from the ex along with a copy of his passport showing his signiture.  Svetlana had tried to get the sole custory in court--but failed!  The Judge only then ordered 25% of his salary for child support.  It may be more difficult to terminate the Father's rights than you think. 

[Wild Orchid*]

I do not know if the US Embassy in Kyiv will still do this, but for Svetlana, they accepted a permission letter from the ex along with a copy of his passport showing his signiture.  Svetlana had tried to get the sole custory in court--but failed!  The Judge only then ordered 25% of his salary for child support.  It may be more difficult to terminate the Father's rights than you think. 

We did the same in Russia. I can’t believe that in Ukraine bio father has to come to interview in person. What if he lives very far away from the embassy and refuse to go?

I questioned my rights to terminate the rights if the father of my child. It is very difficult in my case impossible cos I don’t live in Russia any more. My son turned 18 today (or yesterday in my case  -25.09) so it doesn’t matter any more

[Jet]

I can’t believe that in Ukraine bio father has to come to interview in person.

This requirement was very short lived, as the unintended consequences showed themselves rather quickly 

[Sohkay]

Yes, the requirement for the father's presence was dropped. And from what I've found out, according to the regs, you need ONE of the following.
1) Document giving full custody of the child to the mother, OR
2) Notarized permission letter with copy of passport from father, OR
3) Father's death certificate

The custody document (or death certificate) is optimal, as it facilitates adoption of the child in the U.S., and reduces the likelihood of the bio-father interfering or having input over your family. I've also now heard that it can facilitate placement of the child in school.

Any current experiences out there contrary to this?

[Jet]

I've also now heard that it can facilitate placement of the child in school.

Any current experiences out there contrary to this?

This surely varies by state, but we were never asked for any documentation regarding custody to enroll Kolya in school, nor were we required to produce a S.S. number for him - just shot records from the county health dept. and ID for Momma & myself

[catzenmouse]

Our experience for getting Sergei into school was the same as Jet's. When they asked for the SSN we simply told them that his case was pending with USCIS and they were fine with that.

Ken