How did you meet your wife?

[Nat]

I continue to study, so to say internet and international dating. Reading all the recent posts about motivation (why are women seeking marriage with AM or why are AM seeking marriage with RW) I decided to run a small poll. Married (or ex-married) men, please answer this simple question
May be my English can be a little bit puzzling in the options of this poll, so I’ll explain By “I met her another way” I mean that a man wasn’t aiming to find precisely RW and wasn’t looking for a RW at all that time and met her by chance because they were working together, had common friends, on a vacation, on a party or something like this, I mean like you meet AW

[Nat]

While there were only 2 answers and it was possible to modify poll options, I did it in order all married men could participate

[Ste]

What about us who are unmarried but living with an FSU lass?

Ste

[Rvrwind]

What about us who are unmarried but living with an FSU lass?

You don't count!! Your living in SIN!!!
Or is that sinning where your living!!!

[Wayne B]

Nat, I met Anna through an agency after five years of travel to Russia/Ukraine....but,my very first trip was to Russia/Novosibirsk out of curiosity...not for a woman....the need to know why Russia and U.S. were so mad at each other??? I remember my father telling me that I was 'Crazy' to go there.....I wish that my father was alive today to meet his new Daughter in law....I know that he would love her as much as I do......

[Mir]

Wayn

Can I ask how you got the idea that you will find why US and Russia are mad at each other in Novosibirsk?

Was that trip before CCCP broke up?

[macman]

You don't count!! Your living in SIN!!!   
Or is that sinning where your living!!!   

Too funny Reverind Wind. . .


mm

[BC]

Met 'another way' while we both were travelling / on vacation.  Married almost 5 years now.  I think that finding a partner is not all that hard, even that you don't have to look for 'her'.  IMHO Exposure, keeping your eye open and patience are the keys to that magic door.

[Nat]

You don't count!! Your living in SIN!!!
Or is that sinning where your living!!!

Hehe, something like this

Well, Ste, if you have a long term relationship like "civil marriage", as we call it here, and just don't want to register it - i think it will do as a marriage, so feel free to participate in a poll But if you mean just dating period before marriage, then it doesn't count Btw, you have a "looking" status, not "committed"

Nat, I met Anna through an agency after five years of travel to Russia/Ukraine....but,my very first trip was to Russia/Novosibirsk out of curiosity...not for a woman....the need to know why Russia and U.S. were so mad at each other??? I remember my father telling me that I was 'Crazy' to go there.....I wish that my father was alive today to meet his new Daughter in law....I know that he would love her as much as I do......

Very interesting story! You know, even now there are a lot of people here who would say that going in the USA is crazy too... Unfortunately, propaganda has a long term-influence... Luckily after press and TV broke the wall between our two cultures most people began to change their attitude...

Thanks to everybody for sharing your experience Please keep on, it's very interesting and educating

[jb]

Met 'another way' while we both were travelling / on vacation.  Married almost 5 years now.  I think that finding a partner is not all that hard, even that you don't have to look for 'her'.  IMHO Exposure, keeping your eye open and patience are the keys to that magic door.

Yep,,, it also helps if you are rich and good looking too.

[Thor]

I meet my wife in November 2005. This was my second trip to Ukraine. The first one was with Jack Braggs company firstdream. I meet my wife by using a private helper in Kharkov. 2 of my friends told me to use him and his service because he was what they called "a white guy". That ment that he was a honest guy in Ukraine. He runned newspapers ads in 5 papers in Kharkov and I meet almost 40 girls during my 2 weeks stay in Kharkov. I could have meet more girls buy had no time to meet all. I had the time of my life during this 2 weeks and just before I left Kharkov so did I meet my wife to be . Now almost 2 years later so am I happy married man I have no regretsw that I went to Ukraine to look for a wife, it has been a farytail:))

[BC]

Yep,,, it also helps if you are rich and good looking too.

Guilty of neither...

[Kuna]

Nat,

I was going on holidays to seek out the homelands of my family (I went to Germany, Latvia and Ukraine on that holiday).  I'd toyed with the idea of meeting someone while in Ukraine and a few months before my trip I was driving home from a family gathering and thought "Damn it... I'll do it even if nothing works out".

Well, I found RWD...  read as much as I could...  and took the advice that made sense to me.

I joined one pay site and found a free site and ended up finding My Girl from the free site.

We met... had a great time... she returned home and I went back to her at the end of my trip.  She returned to Kiev with me and as you're aware I've just spent a little over 3 weeks with her in her home.

I'm not married yet but we're committed.  She keeps reminding me every 10 days that we're up to 200 days of communication... 210... 220.  I think we're actually coming up to 270 days but she'll let me know soon I'm sure.  (Actually, I noticed she has the days marked out on a calendar hanging in her home so now I know how she keeps such an accurate count.

Judging from your posts I'm sure you'll find success when you decide to search.  Set your standards high, be logical in your search before you let emotions interfer and don't settle for second best. By the way... I reckon you're in an idea position now because you'll be able to relate to the challenges men face much more than women who haven't participated here as you have.

Let them know what you know... tell them what you expect. Many men will be relieved to find such a genuine girl!

Good luck when your search starts.

Kuna

[Wayne B]

Wayn

Can I ask how you got the idea that you will find why US and Russia are mad at each other in Novosibirsk?

Was that trip before CCCP broke up?

  Mir, yes, CCCP had begin to break up......Siberia was my choice to start....because I wanted to go deep into what for me was an unknown......My curiosity was at that time 'wild' and untamed.....To my pleasure, I will never forget the intrest shown to both I and the New and also 'curious' friends that I met then....and still talk with today.....To my joy Mir....we are all loving people....searching for truth....

[CaptB]

Nat,

Doing "some" research is a definite plus in this endeavor........BUT. "Over" researching leads some....................to never start. I met a tall good-looking Asian American accountant in Tver, Russia......during my first visit. We discussed the "making of a list"......of qualities you "must have"......and a secondary list of "like to haves".......in a partner. I produced my list which ocupied one side of a 3" x 5" card. He produced, from a brief case, his 100+ page (8 1/2 x 11)......(both sides of each page)....ring-bound "book" of charts and graphs etc......which would enable him to find the "perfect match".

A week later he comented that I seemed to be meeting alot of interesting women.......and appeared to actually be enjoying myself in the process. He appeared frustrated......and bewildered.....that his "book" was not helping him produce results. We went out to a club that night.....had a few drinks.......talked. I made the comment to him that he had already accomplised more that many guys will. He said....."what do you mean"?. I replied........."you are here".  He asked if he could borrow "my" little list.......and I obliged by handing it over. I said......."my" list will be of little help......each persons list will be different". He understood. I encouraged him to dance......to loosen-up a little. Finally......he seemed to be enjoying himself.

The next day he came in to the LTP office......without his briefcase........but with his "book".
He promptly dumped his "masterwork" into the waste basket.........and produced his own palm-sized list. He offered to let me read it......I declined. Before the trip was over.....he met a very nice woman........and had a perpetual smile on his face for the duration of his visit. Two more trips.......and they were engaged. They have been happily married for about five years now.

Too much research can prevent one from ever starting. There are no guarantees. Polls ect. will show you the range of experiences that you can expect......but they also show you the many varied paths other individuals have taken. You will ultimately need to follow your own path. Make some contacts.....make plans.......and go. When you arrive in the FSU.....you will have done more than the majority on these forums will ever do.


Capt B

[Kuna]

Hang on... have I got the right Nat??? Yeah... I think I have...

CaptB,

Nat is a FSUW who is thinking about International dating etc... but I guess your advice still holds true.  When she's ready (if she's ready) the best way to start is by taking the first step.  I think this journey CAN be over-researched and sooner or later anyone seeking success MUST start with meeting someone.

Kuna

[ScottinCrimea]

I've been living with my wife for 3 years and married for a little over one year (Had to sort out some document problems).  We met when a scammer used her photos to contact me through a free internet dating site.  When I decided to come visit my wife was brought into the picture and the rest is history.

[Nat]

Thank you for sharing! All the experiences are so different and so interesting!

Nat,

Doing "some" research is a definite plus in this endeavor........BUT. "Over" researching leads some....................to never start.

If to say the truth, I'm not sure yet if I want to sart again. While I'm communicating here, I can see that most men here are normal people, they have interesting personality, they can discuss different things... But it's only here. May be it's because this forum attracts people who actually think and like to do it

Too much research can prevent one from ever starting.

Yep, you're right. I have such problem - it's for sure.

CaptB,
Nat is a FSUW who is thinking about International dating etc...

I confirm it

but I guess your advice still holds true.  When she's ready (if she's ready) the best way to start is by taking the first step.  I think this journey CAN be over-researched and sooner or later anyone seeking success MUST start with meeting someone.

The problem is I've taken first steps twice already and then decided it's not for me I've told about it in other topics. I just can't screen a lot of men who a screening a lot of women, it seems to be not right personally for me. But I do admitt that it's a good way to find your second half though So may be I'll try it again later

[Nat]

I've been living with my wife for 3 years and married for a little over one year (Had to sort out some document problems).  We met when a scammer used her photos to contact me through a free internet dating site.  When I decided to come visit my wife was brought into the picture and the rest is history.

Wow, such a twisted story! But how did you manage to find the girl who was actually pictured on that pictures? And to contact with your future wife?

Met 'another way' while we both were travelling / on vacation.  Married almost 5 years now.  I think that finding a partner is not all that hard, even that you don't have to look for 'her'.  IMHO Exposure, keeping your eye open and patience are the keys to that magic door.

It's interesting - I know a lot of examples when future husband and wife found each other during their holidays May be it's because of this special atmosphere - when people relax from work, they become themselves and it's easier to find a peson who shares your attitudes and is compatible

[ScottinCrimea]

When the scammer asked for money, I refused until I had some sort of confirmation that she was real, so I asked for her address and phone numbers.  She was an acquaintenance of my wife's so she gave me the phone numbers of her home, her grandmother's phone and the number of where she worked, not expecting that I would actually call, since they didn't speak English and I didn't speak Russian.  I called an agency in the city and spoke with their English translator.  I explained the situation and asked her to call the numbers and check it out for me.  While everything checked out, she never did call at a time when she could speak with my wife.  The next day my wife came storming into the agency demanding to know what they were calling everyone about.  After they told her, she confronted the scammer, then looked through my letters and photos and decided that maybe she was interested, so she took over the letter writing herself.  All I knew at that time was that the numbers were real and that the description of the woman who had come into the agency office matched the pictures.  It wasn't until quite a bit later that she told me the whole story and that it wasn't her that I had first been writing to.

[CaptB]

Sorry Nat,

I thought I was addressing my answer to an AM. Actually......international marriage is not for everyone. As jb says......it is the "advanced class"......for marriage. It has many extra problems added to the equation......over a domestic marriage. Maybe a international marriage "is" for you..........but the first two men you met.......were not.

My wife was not looking for a marriage outside of Russia. I saw her profile on a website that no longer exists......trueloves.com. The site was started my a man who was looking for a partner from the FSU. It started out as a hobby....a tool......to help "himself" find a partner. He did find an FSU wife.....and both he and his wife continued to build to website. They were very diligent about informing members of scammers.....and not allowing e-mail addresses that originated from agencies. They had the best search engine I have ever seen on a marriage website.

I was looking for a partner....who already had children.......and no more than a 10 yr age difference. When I came accross her profile I thought the things she had to say were very interesting. She did not have any children......and she was 14 yrs younger than I am.....so I passed her by. But every now...and then.....I would return to her profile. She happend to live in the next Russian city I would visit......Stavropol. I decided to contact her to see if she would let me hire her as an interpreter for a few days. We started to e-mail each other.....and after two weeks had our first telephone conversation. Phone calls quickly turned into "daily" calls. A few months later I went to visit her.....but not as an interpreter. I think we had a good idea of each others' personalities......even before meeting. When we finally met.....there were not too many surprises. We probably talked for more than 100 hours.....before meeting......made easy....because my wife was a teacher of English...for 14 years.

My wife had helped many other women with correspondence to foreign men. She had helped her friend correspond with an AM from Florida.......who did come to Stavropol to meet. My wife said he was a very strange man.....who had a severe case of....."foot fetishism".  They could not get him to the airport fast enough.....when it was time for him to leave. This little story is significant.....because it was not told to me....until the end of my first evening in Stavropol.

Before departing on my trip....I asked my future wife for some clothing sizes etc......for possible gifts  had in mind. Upon arrival we went to my rented flat.....and she cooked dinner......had some wine....and talked almost all night. I opened a box.....and asked her if I could borrow one of her "feet". She now had a look of slight discomfort on her face. I reached into the box......picked-up one of her feet....AND..................slipped on a very nice black velvet Anne Taylor.....slipper.......and handed her the other. She loved them! With a look of relief........she told me the story of the AM from Florida. We had a good laugh. She was relieved all AM were not "foot crazy"....as she said.

I think we became friends first......and more later. I like my wife.....and I believe she likes me alot also. I have met many couples who talk of "love"......but sometimes don't even appear to "like" each other. I think the emphasis on "liking each other"......is sometimes very underrated.......I think it should really be at the top of the list.

Our 4th wedding anniversary will be in August.


Capt B

[TigerPaws]

We are about to have our 7th anniversary in a week and this roller coaster ride just keeps on getting better all the time.

As for how we met, I found my lady through the "old" Anastasia agency back when they printed glossy catalogs (1998-99) I sent her (and many others) a translated cover letter by express mail with several photo's taken in a studio for that expressed purpose. We communicated by letter and e-mail for the next 6 months before meeting for the first time in Nassau Bahamas and the rest as they say is history (I like to say a work in progress).

TigerPaws 

[acrzybear]

You don't count!! Your living in SIN!!!
Or is that sinning where your living!!!

You know that old saying "don't sin where you live"

[Air Dog]

I purchased the address of my Kievan lady through A Foreign Affair, but I made all other arrangements on my own.  I think it a good impression on her that went I went to visit her I only visited her, and not other women as well.  We we married in Kiev in 2000 and I can honestly say that I wouldn't trade my Tanya for anyone.

Air Dog
California

[catzenmouse]

Air Dog,

 Welcome to RWD! Good to have another married man around here. Would you mind taking a bit of time to tell us about your self in the introductions section?

Ken