When do I start

[rring]

I know you guys might have wanted me to say hello in the introduction section, but I think it is somewhat useless. I am 19 and randomly look on some Russian dating sites when I am bored. I will need to graduate college first or near the end to actually really start looking. But the problem is it is in about 4 years(I am going for engineering and it takes more than 5 years for BS).I was thinking starting about a year before I graduate and then if it is possible go over to the FSU after I graduate so I can have more than 2 weeks vacation. Now do you think it will be harder in say 5 years to find a RW because of our degenerating economy?

I really want to go to Russia and/or Crimea, but have heard heard on a pretty cool video
that it is hard to get around without a good knowledge of Russian. I am a huge WW2 buff and it would be sweet to go to Moscow and go see the museums.

What is the average age of men looking on the sites, it has to be about 30. I know this has been said about 10 million times but how do Americans(especially AW) feel about men that are 10 plus years older then their wives? So if I got at it early, it will be better. Some women say on their introduction pages that the are looking for men as young as 18, but is it even possible for 18 year olds to get a Russian? What is theoretically the youngest and the realistic youngest AM that can get a RW? It is kind of hard for me to right on forums because I think in somewhat of a non-linear fashion on them.

[docetae]

1- About ww2, try Ukraine, access is more easy than russia (no visa...) and you will find a lot of museum and spots, almost all cities with more than 100k people have a liberty square with some relics from ww2, usually a T34 (T34 were built in Kharkov...)

2 - Age, I will not start another thread but from my own experience, women who are not from agency (I don't like at all the agency system...) but on dating sites are looking for men their age or with a 5 years difference average, 10 years max.

If i can give you an advice, at your age, the best you can do is to travel and discover world. This will open your mind, probably change your vision of life. You will meet people, women,  have love stories and after this is only life... If you have interest in fsu, try to save some money and travel as often you can. Another way is to learn language, spend one year in Russia or Ukraine as student and get both degrees , in US and FSU. Some ukrainian university have automatic recognition of diploma with european universities, so you can choose to do a master in Europe too ...

Good luck for all your projects !

[Al_C]

If you are just looking around, why not go there first and then look?  Many agencies have events in Russia where they bring AM and RW into a social setting and let them meet in person.  This will give you a flavor for what to expect when you are ready to begin a serious search.

What will the scene be in 5 years?  I don't know, nor does anybody without a crystal ball know either.  Probably similar to the scene now.

Russia requires a visa, unlike Ukraine.  It is not a problem to get one, but they cost good money ($100.00 to $300.00 depending on how fast you want it).  But honestly, if $300.00 is going to be a deal breaker for you, forget about the whole thing.  If you want to carry the process to conclusion, you are looking at a minimum of $5,000.00 and probably more like $15,000.00.

English?  You will find good English in Moscow (been there) and in St. Pete (been there too).  In smaller cities like Yekaterinburg, Omsk or Novosibirsk, forget about English once you leave the hotel lobby.  I suggest an interpreter in such places.  They don't cost that much, but try to avoid letting the agency hire one for you.  They will triple the price, pocket most of it, and pay the interpreter her usual rate.

[2tallbill]

If you're really 19 why don't you first see if you can actually make the
grade in an engineering school. I went to Oregon State and they flunk out
about 80% or more of each Freshman class. I hated my Math Classes there competing against a bunch of Engineering flunk outs (but still math whizzes)

If you don't make it in engineering school you could get a BA instead of a BS and take Russian as your second language, which brings me up to my next question........

Have you thought of the possibility of being an exchange student for a year?
You could get by fairly inexpensively that way, pick up some serious language skills
and make a zillion contacts. Rumor is that cute / smart Russian girls go to Russian Universities. Go figure.

Don't worry about our economy. We haven't had a bad recession since Jimmy Carter messed things up in the late 70s/early 80s. I was in High School and college and it was over before I got out. Nobody can tell you what things will be like in 5 years.

There is a book called "What color is my parachute" I highly recommend it for teenagers. You can check it out for free at your local library or buy it at amazon.


Udachi!! (good luck!)


Bill

[I/O]

Rring: Firstly, a hearty welcome to one of very few younger guys who have an interest in this idea.

When to start is a question ultimately, only you can answer, but FWIW, it IMO is never too young to start the learning process because after all is said and done, it is that knowledge you absorb which will help to construct a solid platform from which to jump at some stage.

As far as "Getting" a Russian Woman, they have these shops up and down the streets where these Russian brides is a waitin' to be "Got", so it's dead easy, you can turn up, wave the passport and "Get" one. (Sarcasm intended) I think you'll catch the point, which is the whole process, when it is all boiled down, is the same ol' boy meets girl and maybe, just maybe, they fall in love and the life journey begins. Don't be deluded into thinking it is very much different from the process on your home soil but for the fact it is one helluva lot more difficult. Distance and language are just two things which one needs to overcome before there is any chance at all.

At the risk of sounding fatherly, which is not my intention, I urge you to keep the focus on your education and career first and foremost for the foreseeable future. That after all, will build a financial base, which you will need to work from in every other aspect of life, not least of all this one.

If you are seriously interested, I suggest you read through the FAQ section here a couple of times. With time on your side as it is with you, I'd also suggest you embark on some language study, from there I would be inclined to suggest you look to take a short vacation to Russia or nearby somewhere during your study years and make your own assessment. I suspect you'd have a barrel of fun and come back so much the wiser. One thing I am certain about is that when communicating with a young Russian woman, if you have been to Russia and know something about her country, you will rise head and shoulders above the pack in her eyes.

I would suggest you erase from your thinking the idea it might become more difficult at a later time. Economics in America will ebb and flow and one thing is for sure, you don't want a girl simply because she sees economic betterment by marrying you. Further, I am yet to see evidence that improving economics in Russia are doing anything to reduce the number of available decent women. Sure it might shift here and there, but there IMO will always be a number of Russian women who would be prepared to consider a foreign man as a life partner provided he is a decent guy.

Right now, at 19, I think you would find it difficult to convince a Russian woman you could provide the life stability most marriage minded people are seeking and of course you have to some extent acknowledged that in your opening post. The key IMO to your journey if you persist is patience. Time is you best friend so use plenty of it.

I/O   

[Ronnie]

rring,
This is weird.  I think you are the youngest person here.  You asked about the average age of the men "looking on the sites" and suggest it might be around thirty.  I suggest younger, if "looking on the sites" is the criterion.  The average age of those who actually travel to FSU is probably much higher than that and I'd suggest the average age of those who follow through and go the whole 9 yards is again higher...probably late forties.

Here's what I find weird.  You're too young to appreciate "la difference" as they say.  Do you really understand sweet until you've tasted bitter?  I think if you marry a RW right out of the gate, you'll be wondering what the AW option may have been like...especially when the RW has one of her emotional outbursts.

Having said all that, if you feel your life would be better with an RW than otherwise, then you've got the time to take it slow.  Learn the language while you're young..it's much easie then.  Take it slow and in the proper sequence as others have described. 

[Bob Smith]

Now do you think it will be harder in say 5 years to find a RW because of our degenerating economy?

The economy… no one can predict where the economy is going to be in 5 yrs regardless of who’s in the White House.  The United States is the most vibrant robust economy in the world.  If a possible pull back in economic activity 5 yrs from now is keeping you awake at night you are not ready to marry a girl from any country.  Once you “get” your Russian girl the two of you are going to live through numerous boom and bust cycles before you part ways at the grave.  Make your bank recession proof first... if possible.

I know this has been said about 10 million times but how do Americans(especially AW) feel about men that are 10 plus years older then their wives?

As far as the acceptability of age difference… all I have to say is, who cares?  If you find and marry a girl that is 10 years younger than you why do you care whether it’s acceptable to American women?  I know some people on other threads vehemently disagree with me on this point, but… Most Americans wouldn’t think the idea of a young single college graduate going to the FSU on a wife hunt is a very acceptable thing… especially American women.  If acceptance by everyone is essential for your long term happiness you may want to think of something a bit more conventional.  Besides man, you’re 19 now, but it’s hardly likely you are going to want to even talk to an 18 yo European girl when you are 30.  Unless you live a very mundane life a lot happens between 19 and 30.

So if I got at it early, it will be better. Some women say on their introduction pages that the are looking for men as young as 18, but is it even possible for 18 year olds to get a Russian? What is theoretically the youngest and the realistic youngest AM that can get a RW?

I think you should really cut your teeth in the American market for a couple more years before making any solid plans regarding the FSU.  I think most 30+ yo geazers on this board like myself would trade a million trips to the FSU for 1 year of being a teenager on a US college campus.  I will say giving yourself a few years to learn any language isn't a bad idea.  Although if you never go to Russia it'll have limited utility in a lot of the US... but this is coming from someone who's lived on three different continents and never bothered to learn anything other than English!

Another thing you have to think about is scammers.  There are wonderful women in America and in the FSU.  And there are also women that will use you and break your heart.  My advice is to have your heart broken at least once as an adult in America before you attempt to date in another country... again if possible.  You'll learn a lot about yourself and love before you encounter any foreign scam artists.  I see 30, 40, 50 yo guys getting taken in by obvious scams on the Internet.  I watch the veterans on these sites scream at these people not to send money or whatever and the love sick dopes just go right ahead and Western Union the money anyway.  Its like watching a train wreck in slow motion and you're powerless to stop it.  I don't know what the odds are of a 19 yo avoiding a scamming temptress.

Besides I would love to hear a story of an American man of ANY age that succesfully married a Russian teenager.  I see their pics on the web, but I've never heard of anyone actually marrying any of them.  In fact I've stumbled across several admonishments against concentrating on this age group... http://agencyscams.com/Newbie.html

I have no first hand experience... perhaps some more experienced members can comment on the various age groups encountered in the FSU.

[Al_C]

You will have plenty of years left before it is time to get serious.  Right now, college is your priority, and you are obviously not ready to have a serious relationship, at least not the type that an FSU gal looking to the West wants to have.

My advice from my earlier post stands:  If you are in a position to go there, then go there and attend one of the agency events where they set up a social gathering for a bunch of AM and RW.  Go around the room, talk to the gals and see what happens.  See if you can get a date, see if you can get her phone number, and see if you can get lucky.  Get your feet wet, by all means.  Then go back home, get your degree, start your career, and then worry about getting serious.  You will do it then with a much clearer perspective, which will enable you to make better decisions and thereby get better results.

[I/O]

English?  You will find good English in Moscow (been there) and in St. Pete (been there too).  In smaller cities like Yekaterinburg, Omsk or Novosibirsk, forget about English once you leave the hotel lobby.  I suggest an interpreter in such places.  They don't cost that much, but try to avoid letting the agency hire one for you.  They will triple the price, pocket most of it, and pay the interpreter her usual rate.

3 of the 10 largest cities in Russia, not to mention the comment about spoken English. Holy cow, been to Moscow and St Pete.....the last of the great adventurers, no doubt. The temptation is almost too great, but my excellent self restraint compels me to simply advise the information given (Highlighted above) is seriously inaccurate.

If you are in a position to go there, then go there and attend one of the agency events where they set up a social gathering for a bunch of AM and RW.  Go around the room, talk to the gals and see what happens.

Desperate times call for desperate measures, I doubt a 19 Y/O budding engineer falls into that category just yet.

I/O

[AugustD]

I say get in a Russian class at your university.  Get the education to go.  Do as Bill suggested and explore an exchange program.  Use the incredible resources at hand for you.  One of my greatest regrets is I passed up going to the defense language school while serving in the Air Force when I was offered the opportunity.

Get one of your buddies fired up about going to Ukraine then go!  What an adventure!  You will meet plenty of women.  You will get plenty of lifelessons.  Go for it!

[Al_C]

3 of the 10 largest cities in Russia, not to mention the comment about spoken English. Holy cow, been to Moscow and St Pete.....the last of the great adventurers, no doubt. The temptation is almost too great, but my excellent self restraint compels me to simply advise the information given (Highlighted above) is seriously inaccurate.
 Desperate times call for desperate measures, I doubt a 19 Y/O budding engineer falls into that category just yet.

I/O

I admit that my comment on Yekaterinburg and Omsk is based on hearsay since I have never been to either one, but I spent a total of three weeks in Novosbirsk, and I could not even take a taxi or order a meal in a restaurant there without an interpreter.  And the interpreters are cheaper when hired locally and not through an agency.  Once more, been there, done that.  The agency charged me $15.00 per hour, but one of the ladies I was with hired one directly for me (who was an agency interpreter as her main job), and she worked for me for $6.00 an hour.

As for the socials, I don't think rring was looking in desparation.  He was looking to get his feet wet with the social scene there with the ladies, so I suggested the social as the fastest way to get multiple introductions in a short period of time.

[ScottinCrimea]

My advice from my earlier post stands:  If you are in a position to go there, then go there and attend one of the agency events where they set up a social gathering for a bunch of AM and RW.  Go around the room, talk to the gals and see what happens.  See if you can get a date, see if you can get her phone number, and see if you can get lucky.  Get your feet wet, by all means.  Then go back home, get your degree, start your career, and then worry about getting serious.  You will do it then with a much clearer perspective, which will enable you to make better decisions and thereby get better results.

I would like to ask those here who have attended such events if they think this is good advice for a 19 year old.  What types of women are they likely to meet and is this really the first impression of RW that one should have?

[Al_C]

I would like to ask those here who have attended such events if they think this is good advice for a 19 year old.  What types of women are they likely to meet and is this really the first impression of RW that one should have?

We're talking about trying this for ONE night.  If he doesn't like it, he leaves.  What is the big deal?

[vwrw]

Ah, darn,  This is Turboguy posting.  I didn't realize VWRW was logged in when I posted, Sorry.

Al, I have attended a lot of those types of events.  First off you said something about "see if he can get a date".  That is never a problem.  You can always get a date with about any woman at the event unless someone else got first dibs. 

The problems tends to be the type of woman at the events.  Too many scammers and serial daters. 

Personally I think there are some serious teen agers out there that he would have a shot at.   There are a lot of women that get married by age 20 or so and many would consider a life abroad with a foreigner to be a bit of a fairy tale life and quite desirable.   Yes they may have some immature qualities and some things to learn about life but no more than American teenagers, probably less.

I have also been to Yetkatrinburg a couple of times and Omsk once and did not find a lack of people who spoke English.

[Jet]

A lot of interesting comments so far, but nobody has mentioned the logistical and financial aspect of what happens once rrring meets the girl. The exchange student idea is well worth considering IMHO. However, there are still the immigration requirements that will need to be overcome. Pursuit of an engineering degree is a wonderful thing, but will it leave enough free time to earn $20,000+ per year for three years to meet the petitioner requirements of a K-1/K-3 (or does he have $100,000+ in assets laying around)? If the exchange student idea doesn't work out, will our young warrior have the 6-10 grand a year available to make a couple of trips to search for/spend with his bride to be? Personally I'd be more concerned with these questions, than whether or not to go to a "social". We all know that this endeavor ain't cheap, and I'd hate to see rrring get halfway through the adventure only to realize he doesn't have the cash to see it through - it's not fair to him or the girl.

[I/O]

I admit that my comment on Yekaterinburg and Omsk is based on hearsay since I have never been to either one, but I spent a total of three weeks in Novosbirsk, and I could not even take a taxi or order a meal in a restaurant there without an interpreter. 

Funny how different thing strike different people in different ways, I speak about 6 words of Russian and not very well. I have never had a problem finding people who speak English in Novosibirsk, in fact I continue to be surprised every time I go through there. I also note your comments in another thread regarding S-7 airlines. I have always had excellent service in clean and comfortable planes with them. I'd actually rather fly with them than most of the majors to be honest.

I/O

[Al_C]

Ah, darn,  This is Turboguy posting.  I didn't realize VWRW was logged in when I posted, Sorry.

Al, I have attended a lot of those types of events.  First off you said something about "see if he can get a date".  That is never a problem.  You can always get a date with about any woman at the event unless someone else got first dibs. 

The problems tends to be the type of woman at the events.  Too many scammers and serial daters.

The impression I got is that rring is not ready for a serious relationship.  He just wants to get his feet wet, make some contacts, etc, so he will be ready to hit the ground running when he is ready.  I realize that the women there tend to not be seriously interested.  After all, they only need to show up at these.  The serious ones are the ones who are going to put the time and effort to get themselves a good profile on a site.  But again, I don't think that rring is ready for the serious lot, at least not yet. 

I have also been to Yetkatrinburg a couple of times and Omsk once and did not find a lack of people who spoke English.

Perhaps what I read about these cities is wrong.  Not everything you read is correct.  But as to Novosibirsk, I was there in 2004 and again in 2005.  Each time, I ventured out into the business district myself several times and patronized shops and restaurants.  To get something from a shop, I had to point or pick up what I wanted to buy.  None of the sales personnel understood a single work I was saying.  To eat, I needed a restaurant where the food was on display so I could point again.  Trying to order from the menu was a waste of time because I could not read it, and none of the servers understood any of my words.  They could not even tell me what the total was on my order.  I had to look at the display on the register or on the check. At the currency exchange, I put my dollars down on the table, the clerk handed me roubles, and I counted them against the display on the register.  They were all as helpful as they could be, but no English.

[Al_C]

Funny how different thing strike different people in different ways, I speak about 6 words of Russian and not very well. I have never had a problem finding people who speak English in Novosibirsk, in fact I continue to be surprised every time I go through there. I also note your comments in another thread regarding S-7 airlines. I have always had excellent service in clean and comfortable planes with them. I'd actually rather fly with them than most of the majors to be honest.

I/O

I actually know about 12 words in Russian, and I understand most of the Cyrillic alphabet, such that I can figure some words out and can match up what is spoken to what is written (helpful with metro stops).  Could the status of English in Novo have come so far in the three years since I was there that both of our observations are accurate?  I'm not making up what I posted about here.  It all happened.

As to S-7, I was on them twice, once Germany to Novo and once St. Pete to Novo.  Each time, the plane was cramped, uncomfortable, and downright dirty, and none of the flight attendants spoke a word of English (as compared to Aero, where they all spoke English and the planes were comfortable and clean).  But each time, the S-7 plane boarded exactly on time, took off exactly on time, and landed exactly on time.  And I mean EXACTLY.  They were not even off by a minute.  That kind of punctuality is a fantasy on Aero.

[Misha]

I really want to go to Russia and/or Crimea, but have heard heard on a pretty cool video
that it is hard to get around without a good knowledge of Russian. I am a huge WW2 buff and it would be sweet to go to Moscow and go see the museums.

Being that you are 19 and a bit bored, I would recommend that you start learning some Russian. You are already in university, so take an introductory Russian language class. If you put some time and effort into it, you will at least learn some basic Russian in a year or two. Enough to make life easier as a tourist. Then, go off as a tourist, stay in youth hostels and enjoy yourself. You should also look into going to Russia for a summer to learn more Russian. A number of universities offer summers abroad learning a language or simply learning more about the history and culture of a country. I would suggest these options given your age and the fact that you are already in university.

[Ronnie]

So...what would you call a 19 yo AM at an AFA social...?








Chum?