question for guys corresponding with ladies with children

[phantom]

Diplomacy, that is correct.  We had a conference at the agency, she brought her daughter and I was introduced to her.  Then, the little sleuth done her search on the IM that was used at the agency and found me.   I got the add request it was from Russia, so I added her, and then found out it was the daughter.

[phantom]

Her mother knows that we talk, as the girl began chatting with me, she said her mom was home and wanted to say hi, so we chatted on the web cam, for a few minutes, with her daughter translating as best she could.  Then she left.  She wasn't upsset about it.

[mendeleyev]

1- Mom's and daughters (and sons) here tend to be much closer than in the West.

2- Teens here are not quite as "worldly" advanced as teens in the West, in general but that is changing.

3- It is very common for a Mom here to be far behind the "technology 8 ball" as compared to single Moms in the West therefore it's highly conceivable that Mom and Daughter possibly share an email, chat name, etc.

4- Teens here are utterly fascinated with foreigners.  Based on personality types, some are just darn curious about life in other parts of the world and not afraid to explore when opportunities arise.

5- No matter how private you think it will be, or your courtship was, marriage and courtship decisions here are made by "Soviet" (committee).  The daughter knows more already than you'd ever dream. So does Grandma, sisters, Aunts and female cousins.  They'll all vote (and you'll never know it happened) before you get a "yes" to the big question. Likely the little squirt is a spy reporting directly to Babushka.

6- Depending on Mom's English, the spy could also be aiding and abetting Mom too.

7- Depending on the spy's English, you may be helping her get good marks in her foreign langauge class.

8- If she is 16 or 17, she will graduate soon.  School ends at 11th grade (age 17 is uniform).  Maybe she is learning about Western men as she is curious about her own future prospects.

[Simoni]

Great post, mendeleyev.

Your points are my exact same thoughts.

Good luck to you, Phantom.

~Si

[phantom]

I never thought of that Mendeleyev, thanks for the in put.  She attends college.  She also told me yesterday, that along with her mom writing me, she does (Which I figured her input) but, also her mother's girlfriend writes also.  Thanks for the good luck wish Si, I think I'll need it or bail on this one.

[Diplomacy]

SSC- Soviet Supreme Court.  Babushka gets veto power quite often, and breaks ties.  They do not teach it in school, it is already suppose to be common knowledge.

[LEGAL]

Diplomacy I do believe it is in their DNA  genetically! 

[Vaughn]

Babushka gets veto power quite often, and breaks ties.

This was surely true for me. I met her Mama, sister, cousin, daughter, niece - and am sure they
had very animated discussions about me. Why would babushka exercise her veto? Never having
met an American, she observed how I interacted with both men and women in the extended family.
It helped that I could speak her language (to an extent) and showed no trace of arrogance - which
is how she was taught to perceive Americans through propaganda. Ladies love a gentleman, no matter
what their nationality.

Mendeleyev, your observations are spot on. And Phantom, I wish you the best of outcomes.

[Diplomacy]

I believe Phantom is doing quite well.  Just keep doing whatever you are doing, as long as it is the "real you".  I think it is the real you and means you are in the right area, just a matter of finding someone perfect for you and her.

Just remember, look at how aware of everything the daughter was.  Mama has taught her and had many more years to improve skill.

[phantom]

Yes, I'm being the real me and had another video chat with a different lady yesterday, and she brought in her little boy.  He was cute and very curious and was moving around a lot, as she was trying to get him to settle down.  That's the second one that brought her child and it was also our first chat.