The Muddy Angle

[ambach123]

I am told that more than 50% of the K-1 visa go back without ever getting married. So Muddy's story is not so uncommon.

The source of this stat are some postings from a guy by named Bruno who posted some actual stats from USCIS; it is all in the archives.

With regard to lifetime limit of two K-1 visas, I believe a waiver is freely granted, unless you have a domestic abuse history. In the alternative, one can marry in FSU and file for a K-3; the time for K-1 and K-3 is about the same.

[Daveman]

I am told that more than 50% of the K-1 visa go back without ever getting married. So Muddy's story is not so uncommon.

The source of this stat are some postings from a guy by named Bruno who posted some actual stats from USCIS; it is all in the archives.

With regard to lifetime limit of two K-1 visas, I believe a waiver is freely granted, unless you have a domestic abuse history. In the alternative, one can marry in FSU and file for a K-3; the time for K-1 and K-3 is about the same.

I've heard some similar numbers as well, but I haven't made the attempt to verify anything.

So far the thread hasn't been very informative so probably will wind up being bumped out anyway, but it would be interesting to hear more of the story, e.g., How long did Muddy date his lady before bringing her here on the K-1? How much face time did they accumulate prior to filing and her arrival?  What was her English proficiency level at the time of meeting and later at the time of her arrival? Did something in the relationship change to make him suspicious enough to cause him to install a key-logger?

There are too many unanswered questions to draw concrete conclusions... 

Now, as far as the K-1 being sort of a "trial", certainly it is better to avoid that by natural relationship growth to the point of deep love, devotion, and ultimate commitment prior to any move. If one is in doubt - don't file for the visa.. Don't file early "expecting" things to grow that way either.  That aspect certainly is not rocket science.  Some people who rush into things have gotten lucky with it, some haven't.   Some have banked on "intuition" and thus far remain unscathed; many have not.

[BillyB]

So this is where the missing posts went from my other thread. First time reading this thread but I already answered your question in my other thread Muddy.

[ambach123]

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[Gator]

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I am glad that you deleted your post.  What I recall reading was, "I am not sure about marriage to my No.1 woman, yet I might bring her over anyway.  No big deal as half of the K-1 women are sent back."

The new and improved Ambach surely does not think that way.  He would not uproot a woman without being 100% committed to marriage with her.  He would spend some money and have her visit him in America via a tourist visa (she probably could get a tourist visa by booking a tour and never staying in the hotels).

[Sculpto]

thanks Gator.. I bit my tongue so hard I bled a little.  You are welcome Ambach. 

[JR]

The new and improved Ambach surely does not think that way.  He would not uproot a woman without being 100% committed to marriage with her.  He would spend some money and have her visit him in America via a tourist visa (she probably could get a tourist visa by booking a tour and never staying in the hotels).

Gator is absolutely right here Ambach. For you it is no big deal to bring a woman here for three months then send her home. What have you lost? Nothing, except perhaps the best thing that might have happened to you.

There's a joke regarding walking across the bar to ask a woman to dance with you which goes like this: "It's not the walk over that is hard, it's the long walk back."

Think about it. The woman leaves everything. Maybe an impossible to replace good paying job. Or just and impossible to replace job in the current economy? What will she have to return to except whispers behind her back?

I'm not getting on your case. I personally don't have any problem with what you have done or are doing (at least from what I have read). But I do want to point out (to everyone) that the women (at least the sincere ones) put a lot more at risk than we men do when they come to us on an extended visa. Please think about, prepare for and attend to her needs should she go back for whatever reason.

[ambach123]

JR she is Ukrainian, for them it is exceedingly hard to get a tourist visa.

Has any young woman from Ukraine gotten a tourist visa? Does someone know?

In any case, we have and will discuss the possibility of a tourist visa, even for a few weeks.
I undestand the commitments RW make when they leave their country.

By the way, she has been committed for a long time, I wanted to waite and have more meetings.

[JR]

JR she is Ukrainian, for them it is exceedingly hard to get a tourist visa.

Has any young woman from Ukraine gotten a tourist visa? Does someone know?

In any case, we have and will discuss the possibility of a tourist visa, even for a few weeks.
I undestand the commitments RW make when they leave their country.

By the way, she has been committed for a long time, I wanted to waite and have more meetings.

I know nothing about the process for Ukraine. But I bet you could make a student visa happen. Are you willing to pony up for a semester at a uni? My best advice would be to hire a professional to make it happen.

Back in the early nineties I did it all myself. I had to redo it once but really it was no big deal. The best thing you can do is to just get started. Once things are rolling they tend to keep moving.

[Sculpto]

Ambach..

I know of several Ukrainian women who have gotten tourist visas.  I know of one who got a green card on her own PRIOR to coming to the US and she didn't win the lottery.  It took 3 years and some $ to an agency, but, she got it.

How old is your lady?  Does she own her flat/house?  Does she have a stable relatively well paying job with track record?  If so, chances are better than you think that she will get a visa.  Filings are down.. tourism is down.. embassy workers are bored and they need to stamp yes on someone.. might as well be your girl..

You can write the letter of invitation and guarantee her financials while she is in the country.  You can find a travel agent in your area that specializes in "Russian" travel.  They may know a "Russian" immigration lawyer that knows which papers to file and how to write the invite.  I have been told repeatedly from different travel agencies in the Russian community that it is possible as long as certain minimums are met.  The rules might be more flexible using proven methods and service providers.

I know here in the Bay Area there are travel agents the specialize in BRINGING Russian tour groups and individuals.  So, it is possible, just have to look in the right places and ask the right people.  This forum might not be the best spot.  Go do it man, and then come back and tell us all how.

costs very little to try.

note: the word Russian in this post was intended to include all FSU nationalities. 

[Gator]

Think about it. The woman leaves everything. Maybe an impossible to replace good paying job. Or just and impossible to replace job in the current economy? What will she have to return to except whispers behind her back? ...But I do want to point out (to everyone) that the women (at least the sincere ones) put a lot more at risk than we men do when they come to us on an extended visa. Please think about, prepare for and attend to her needs should she go back for whatever reason.

JR is correct.  In 2002 I had just returned from a trip to Russia with stars in my eyes.  The wife of one of my business partners is a highly respected psychologist, specializing in family counseling, so at a business party I spelled out the whole RW story to her. 

I talked for a long time, focusing on the RW who had taken my breath away.  In the end I raised the issue of my risks regarding the age gap, her children, etc.  She said, "Don't worry, your RW has more to lose than you do."

[I/O]

I concur with B/F and would add that "men" (oxymoron in itself) who drag a lady over on a "trial" basis with one eye on the airport if she makes a wrong move are low enough to tiptoe under a ducks arse with their umbrella up.

I/O

[GQBlues]

I am told that more than 50% of the K-1 visa go back without ever getting married. So Muddy's story is not so uncommon.

The source of this stat are some postings from a guy by named Bruno who posted some actual stats from USCIS; it is all in the archives.

I thought this myth was put to rest already.

IIRC, this story was largely passed around between boards carelessly before. The USCIS stated that over 50% (closer to 70% if I'm not mistaken) of RWs who entered the US on K-1 Visas returned to their home country within the first year they arrived. While the numbers were challenged, the truth of RWs returning to Russia within the first year of their arrival is not. That's what Advance Parole is for. That silly form inclusion when we all file for their AOS.

[Kuna]

JR she is Ukrainian, for them it is exceedingly hard to get a tourist visa.

Has any young woman from Ukraine gotten a tourist visa? Does someone know?

In any case, we have and will discuss the possibility of a tourist visa, even for a few weeks.
I undestand the commitments RW make when they leave their country.

By the way, she has been committed for a long time, I wanted to waite and have more meetings.

ambach,

I know it means nothing for US policy but Ukrainians and Russians seem to have equal standing to get visas into Oz (and European countries).  If anything some suspect Ukrainian citizens get Oz visas a little more quickly than Russians.


I can't let your last sentance of your post go without a comment...

She's been committed for a long time but you've wanted to wait and have more meetings?

I guess this means you've been stringing her along while bonking the other hopefuls in the subsequent trips???

Not good...