SEXUALLY ACTIVE MAN SEARCHING FOR RW

[JR]

My bad Billy, I'm sorry for that

You should be Mies, you're a bad, BAD girl!!! I'm afraid you'll have to be spanked! Any volunteers to do the deed?

[mies]

hehe  :evil:

[docetae]

What is good now is that between topics posted by Mars and Billyb we have a good idea about what absolute vacuum looks.

[Vaughn]

Also - no divorces and no re-marriages. This is the tradition i was raised in and what i believe in.  :evil:

As we're both previously divorced, Elvira and I would have been destined to die apart and lonely,
although I think it's safe to say we both probably harbored that belief long ago.

... we have a good idea about what absolute vacuum looks.

 

 

[BC]

From what I gather, the first answer to the poll is quite irrelevant with most truly fitting the second or third.

Guys that seek marriage to a FSUW may be sexually active, but only at arms length.

After all, who wants to go through the trouble of wooing into bed, couch or car those fat, ugly, leftover, self possessed AW b!tches your own age?

Those 'gittin it' on a regular basis don't stray far from home, after all why in the world burn tons of cash and time chasing skirt elsewhere?

Be realistic folks....

[I/O]

What is good now is that between topics posted by Mars and Billyb we have a good idea about what absolute vacuum looks.

[Nat]

I didn't vote, because I opt for something in the middle of "NO, it not okay for a WM to take care of his physical needs until he is in a meaningful relationship where emotions are involved." and "NO, a WM must not have any sex until marriage."
I don't understand, why people describe sex as "physical needs" at all. Can sex be good if there are no emotions involved?
If a person wants to get married and is looking for a wife-to-be, I think first they should build emotional commitment, and then have sex
And if 2 people just want to live together, without getting married, then the second option - "meaningful relationship where emotions are involved" is just ok
But of course it depends on a person But I'd prefer to deal with men for whom sex is not just a "physical act", but something more, with emotions involved - such men must be more loyal and trustworthy in family life, I think

Btw, once I saw a very interesting TV program, where they were talking about a study: how long wooing takes in different countries. It appeared that it's absolutely different for different nations - for example, it was told that northern people woo for 3 month on average, Russians - for about 6 month, and Italians can woo for more than a year If don't know if it's true or not, but in our countries 6 month has always be something like standard, and most people didn't tend to have sex during that period. I don't know how it is now, I suspect that now everything is different. But I personally like my old-fashioned attitude to this thing, because it helps to test how trustworthy the person really is

[Misha]

Russians - for about 6 month, and Italians can woo for more than a year If don't know if it's true or not, but in our countries 6 month has always be something like standard, and most people didn't tend to have sex during that period.

Waiting 6 months to have sex while wooing certainly was not what I observed in Russia.

[sunandsail]

You should be Mies, you're a bad, BAD girl!!! I'm afraid you'll have to be spanked! Any volunteers to do the deed?

I was raised to believe in no spanking before marriage.

[Nat]

Waiting 6 months to have sex while wooing certainly was not what I observed in Russia.

What can I say? First, I've said that now it's changing Second, people are different Third, of course in international dating it is replaced with writing or speaking over the phone. To say the truth, there is no real wooing in international dating at all, well, in most cases. So may be people who participate in this thing are ready to compromise
It also depends on many things - culture, sexual activity and temperament, etc. A lot of my friends, who then became married couples, did exactly the same - something around 6 month wooing But I won't deny that I know a lot of people, who had sex much earlier And I wouldn't say they have low morals - no, they do like they feel Everybody chooses what he/she wants in his/her relationship The OP wanted to hear an opinion - I said an opinion

[Boethius]

Judging by his body language, he seems frightened of something.

Perhaps Jennifer Aniston is on the other side of the camera.

[Misha]

A lot of my friends, who then became married couples, did exactly the same - something around 6 month wooing But I won't deny that I know a lot of people, who had sex much earlier

I am curious as to what were the factors at play. How old were the friends who waited after six months of wooing? I expect that they were quite young (18-21).

[docetae]

sorry , what is wooing ? I can not find translation

[KenC]

sorry , what is wooing ? I can not find translation

Docetae,
To "romance" a woman.
KenC

[BillyB]

Those 'gittin it' on a regular basis don't stray far from home, after all why in the world burn tons of cash and time chasing skirt elsewhere?

Be realistic folks....

Not every RW who is within a short drive is not going to go out with me. My sample from the selection locally is not as large as if it were in the FSU. The possiblilty of RW who do go out with me will likely not end in any serious relationship. I may have to date 20 ladies or correspond with thousands to find one that I can spend my life with.

Just "gittin some" isn't enough to satisfy what I'm looking for. Some of my best conversations by way of phone came are currently from a RW in Florida and Moldova now. Those ladies are thinking on the same wavelength as I. I may go fly there if I think the ladies are worth it. If they have a genuine interest in me, a high quality lady is worth the trip. A lady like my ex fiancee is worth the trip. It's not easy to find one like her locally or anywhere. High quality ladies are usually not available and already spoken for.

[IAmZon]

what kind of man is NOT sexually active?

a dead one

same is true for women too (non Victorian era thinking)

[BC]

It's not easy to find one like her locally or anywhere. High quality ladies are usually not available and already spoken for.

That seems like a defeatist attitude, or at the very least seeking a ready-made bed.

I dunno.. this whole RW 'thing' seems to be a cut to the chase, cart before mule deal.  IMO nothing more than seeking consensual shortcut to the BBD.

One could say that a "high quality" man would also be in great demand. Their phones are either constantly ringing, are not able to properly market themselves in their own community. Many (sexually active) men enjoy the challenge of the chase, what's to say that (sexually active) women don't enjoy it as well?  Constantly carrying around that 'I'm a good guy' sign in hopes women will jump in your lap is probably a turn-off.

Fantasies are made of what you can't have, not what you can and both sexes enjoy the chase.

[docetae]

6 months or 3 months romance without sex ? Ok. I can understand if you are both in sadomasochism...

[Son of Clyde]

And now that I think of it, what do the questions posed have to say about masturbation?  It would certainly seem that taking care of 'physical needs' would include practicing masturbation.

So Mies and others, do you really think the man (and woman in the other thread) should also abstain from masturbation until after marriage?

Reminds me of the story of the little boy who has to pass three bedrooms on his way to the bathroom.

In the first room he sees his parents having sex and asks them what they are doing. His father says: "we are playing poker and your mom is my partner."

In the second room his grandparents are having sex. The boy asks what they are doing. His grandfather says: "we are playing gin rummy and grandma is my partner."

It the third room the boy sees his brother masturbating and asks: "where is your partner?"
His brother says: "with a hand like this I need a partner?"

I voted for #1. I think it is ok to have sex before marriage. If it is random sex like at a pick-up bar I would vote no, this is not good.

[Son of Clyde]

Billy, I hope you are not angry I posted my joke. I was just reminded of it by the masturbation statement.

I think if guys are by nature sexually active and seeking a RW maybe they need to curb their sexual appetite. When the guy meets a RW there very well may be a sexual encounter and this will be an indication whether he feels compatible with the lady. Using restraint and not having casual sex is a wise choice anytime. To me there is a lot of emotion that goes with the sex. I was never a one night stand person. I was shy and the sex took some time. It gave me time to really know the woman as a person.

[BillyB]

Billy, I hope you are not angry I posted my joke.

No problem Clyde. Good to see you back posting if anything. Hope all is well with you, your wife and son.

BC, realizing lots of high quality ladies are spoken for is not a defeatist attitude. It's a fact based on the ladies above average manners, attitude, beauty, intelligence, etc....Because they are in higher demand, they are less available. Some RW ask me if there are any good women in America. I always tell them there are plenty of good women but many are married or in relationship. RW that have looked at both American and FSU dating sites seen a clear difference on the sample of women available. They agree with me the quality of FSU women are better than American women.  For me to fly across the World for a lady, she needs to be a step above the ladies at home. My goal is not to marry an average woman. I'd rather be single and live the life I have now instead of settling for average. If a guy has nothing at home, then I guess it's safe to say any lady overseas is a step above.

[BillyB]

So far the men and women who voted for no sex before marriage and sex only in a meaningful relationship in both polls are consistant with each other. except for one person, they all showed back up here. They felt what they would apply to another person is good enough to apply to themselves.

Men, as a whole, who voted it's okay for women to have a lover before a meaningful relationship doesn't feel the exact same freedom applies to men. A large percentage of men who answered in that category in the other poll are absent in this poll. Why? Men tend to allow ladies to get away with more than they allow themselves to get away with.

It's apparent that most men feel that it's a woman's right to have a lover before a meaningful relationship yet when a woman comes to this forum and says "If a guy is writing to other women, he's getting dumped", we tend defend her "rights" for feeling that way instead of chastise her for trying to get men to make a commitment without ever meeting. When a man states a woman better only be writing to him, we would claim he's jealous, a control freak, and insecure.

Where's my ladies votes?!?! I seen a lot of ladies come and go since this poll started yet those who participated that it's okay for a woman to have a lover before a meaningful relationship did not participate in this poll except for one. Is the thought of a man being sexually active before a meaningful relationship too hard to accept? Where's the equal rights here?

[mies]

A large percentage of men who answered in that category in the other poll are absent in this poll. Why? Men tend to allow ladies to get away with more than they allow themselves to get away with.

I don't see how did you come up with this conclusion. It is certainly not a logical one.

[Mars]

Billy, yes it is quite obvious there is a double standard for men and women on this discussion board.

If a woman says a positive for action Y, then she is applauded by not only her fellow females, but by males as well.

If a man says a positive for action Y, then he is roundly criticised by the women here and many men will also join in attacking him.

Women supporting women is not uncommon, even where they clearly know she is wrong, and in years past men would similarly support men.

But somewhere along the line many western men came to be in very close touch with their feminine side and tilted the entire boat on its side.

Also there has always been at work men's attempt to curry favor with women in the hopes they can get in their panties at some point in the future.  Even on a discussion board where there is virtually no chance this is going to occur, men still have the inborn nature to do this.

And there is yet another trend at work as can be seen in the general media in the west.  For instance, it is quite common that men are shown as buffoons in commercials, while the women have to come to the rescue, etc.  Women are pleased to see such depictions, and most men go along with it in a good natured way.  But think of the uproar that would occur from both men and women if a woman was ever portrayed to be the buffoon in a commercial, etc.

A know I will be roundly ridiculed for my comments here and portrayed as a loser by the same men I described above.  However, there are a couple of important ideas that result from what I have observed about this general topic.

First, in a general sense young boys in the west are growing up with a lost sense of their value as males in that they are bombarded with the idea of adult men being portrayed as buffoons and accepting that as normal and know it will apply to themselves.  Who knows how this is going to play out in the future.

Second, on a discussion board such as this, the women can gain a very false sense of their own mental abilities and powers of persuasion since they are mostly applauded and rarely (I didn't say never) taken to task for the lack of fairness, logic or even common sense in their comments.  It really isn't even fair to the women themselves.

[wiz]

Staying on topic I would like to ask:

Why a man and woman when they meet, after some time of communication, are both adults and are attracted to each other (lust comes to mind), should not have sex early in their relationship?

In my view it’s a natural progression and of course both will want to know if they are compatible in that area, because like it or not sex is one of the biggest, if not the biggest cornerstones in any relationship!

On the other hand how many of us, when we met a very attractive woman didn’t feel the urge and lust, forgot morals and logic and couldn’t wait to take her to bed, especially if the woman was indicating reciprocation and making it clear that she wanted the same?

Don’t tell me that any of you, under such circumstances, would wait for a few months to develop loving feelings first and then have sex…… because it’s more proper and moral and more fulfilling!

How many times we heard many men listened to their small head first before the large one took over later? 

PS: While posting I notice on the left of the screen the lady on the advert for Brides of Ukr and I am sure, if you had the chance and she was amenable at the meeting....... all of you would say no sex yet... must wait to get to know each other better!