Life Changes...Part Deux

[The Natural]

I got married to a 16-year old Spanish girl, but that was many summers ago.

[TomT]

... I, for one, know nothing of anything prior to this beyond a few references in this thread...

I've been reading about "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty" since long before Natalia arrived on the scene (then wisely departed stage left). It's all the same familiar motif. God only knows how Billy finds the time to write with so many women to satisfy.

[BillyB]

Sorry to hear that the mother lost her job. Now if she is going to accept a job in Poland, will she have to regularly commute there from Ukraine, won't she?

Actually it was A who lost her job. Mom never found one yet unless she wanted to travel to another city or pay for the right to work at a local clinic. Mom will live in Poland when the job starts. A will remain in Ukraine.

So you are now in the K-1 process. Did A filed already some necessary papers on her part? Or does the process prescribe that you have to be approved as her sponsor first, and now you are waiting for this approval, before she files anything?

My government is slow and A has time to prepare her documents. The consular in Kiev should give her instructions after they receive the documents my government has to process. I will also go over things with her. NOA1(Notice of Action) has happened months ago. When I get to the NOA2 stage, things will happen fast.

Billy, I hope that your submitted documents raise no questions from US immigration authorities. Does A already take care about the papers on her part, like police certificate or something, in order not to delay the process?

Compared to what I've read on visajourney and trip reports here, I've done a whole lot more communication with A than most men so evidence to prove a relationship is no problem. A will also receive an engagement ring from me before her interview. That is also evidence and a big one for anyone that cares. It shows the interviewer that the man is serious. A could get a police certificate in Ukraine and I'm sure they'll give her a pass from having to obtain one from Libya. When I sent in my documents, I added a note that A will be moving to Ukraine and will have her interview there instead of Tunisia and I will be notifying them of an address change. I just didn't know A would be moving to Ukraine so fast.

You seem to have a compulsion to boast

No, I don't have a compulsion to boast. What you do know is I have lots to boast about.

I can't help you if you don't help yourself. If anybody hasn't read this thread in it's entirety, it's best you keep unpleasant comments to yourself or risk looking dumb or me embarrassing you.

I've said numerous times I don't brag to people about myself, what I own or what I've accomplished in life. I'm writing some things so men here can compare themselves to me and they may see that they've done less, bragged more and catch less women. I'm giving you guys something to think about, That's all or you can keep thinking that I'm trying to impress you and myself. I know what my competition does because the ladies I've dated tell me about you. They can talk to me about these things because they've already established I'm not one of the rejects. You don't think I'm helping anybody sharing some information with the forum here?

If it's true what RW say and only 10% of the men have the total package and ideal for marriage then you should listen. I used to think women had it easy since dozens of men throw themselves at them but the truth is I know now that I have it easy because I'm a man that can attract lots of ladies and have my choice. All I'd have to do is choose wisely and rely less on luck. Even if it hurts you to believe I'm a man that have the qualities that many family oriented women like, even if you don't want to believe, but you can't deny some men can attract lots of women while most struggle. How many times have you read men here sending money to women they never met? They are hungry to have some woman... any woman into their lives.

When I date women and if they have intelligence, they will see me as an intelligent man, man of action,  good manners, and they, on their own without my help, can determine me as a man that has good work ethic, strong mentally and physically, kind, good heart etc.... I win them over with who I currently am, not who I was. Later in life a lady may learn of some of my accomplishments and respect me more for withholding that information.

For the most part, all men need is a pretty face and we're happy. Women need much more. If they want kids, they will take extra precaution to which man they want to bring into their lives, after all the man will be half the recipe of their kids. They don't want their kids to be dumb, ugly and weak. They want a winner who of course doesn't promote he's a winner but shows by action. They will decide for themselves who you are. Some of you may be insulted by what I'm saying but go and improve your personal hygiene, become physically fit and get educated, if not for yourself do it for the ladies and they will notice you a better man now than you once were. Pay more attention to your lady more than yourself. Very few family oriented women will accept a man in her life who lacks mental ability, morals, in poor physical health, and emotionally unstable or overly sensitive man.

David, if you find yourself upset reading what I'm writing, I already warned people early in this thread I'm going to lose a few friends here so why are you surprised? There are a lot of RW reading this thread and if you notice, they aren't worked up as you and a few other guys who hug their computers more than their girl. Think about it. MAN UP.

I don't remember saying that you've said you were poor previously, you've lost me again...  might be those little voices in your head again? 

I'll tell you what, go back and read your posts in this thread and if you can prove to me you didn't say I was poor, then I'll answer your questions but you are making yourself look incompetent or drunk when you post.

I remember when Hammer showed up on this thread an he didn't have a problem with what I'm saying and it upset you so told him to go back and re read to fully understand everything the way you read it. You can't even understand what you've been writing. You might want to check the expiration date on your brain.

AJ, where are you at? Do you still think men here aren't flustered?

[Donhollio]

that's why I only ask questions on your current posts.

The one I asked (which you're now avoiding) was a pretty simple one.  A is 18 now.  You said you've been writing to her for 16 or 18 months... or something like that.

I just wanted to confirm whether A was 16 when you started writing to her... or whether she had JUST turned 17?


  Can you please just answer one question...  Was A 16 when you started writing to her - or had she just turned 17?

I already warned people early in this thread I'm going to lose a few friends here so why are you surprised? There are a lot of RW reading this thread and if you notice, they aren't worked up as you and a few other guys who hug their computers more than their girl. Think about it. MAN UP.

 Billy I'm hoping that you have not annoyed too many people in the past that are currently reading this thread. The avoidence of answering this question of her age at the time you first started correspondence is troubling to say the least. It wouldn't take much for the info you have given to be forwarded to the US immigration department in Oregon or Washington state to cause some red hi-lighting on your file. So maybe clear this up now before the bile hits the morally corrupt fan.

[dbneeley]

David, if you find yourself upset reading what I'm writing, I already warned people early in this thread I'm going to lose a few friends here so why are you surprised? There are a lot of RW reading this thread and if you notice, they aren't worked up as you and a few other guys who hug their computers more than their girl. Think about it. MAN UP.

Billy, as usual you give yourself far too much credit. You are simply not important enough to me in the scheme of things to become "upset" with you whatever foolishness you should put forth.

Any man of character and refinement needs no boastfulness, especially in a public forum.

However, in responding to the issue you have simply underlined how accurate my observations were. As for being so "accomplished"--I think it is highly likely if we did a survey of board members, you would be amazed at some of their accomplishments--most of which you aren't likely to hear about on this forum since they simply lack the level of crudeness you display so readily. You have no way to determine how you compare with anyone, really, although you obviously derive great comfort in imagining you outclass them.

This may be simply because heavy equipment operators aren't considered particularly high-status individuals in the social scheme of things. If your imaginings of how "superior" you are keep you satisfied with your lot in life, I suppose it is worth something at that.

Just not to me.

Too bad, though, that the way you claim to be with women is not the same standard you apply to your public interactions with this forum. Your excuses notwithstanding, people who are cultured simply don't carry on in that fashion in public. You are fortunate you are not dealing with a self-confident and mature FSUW--you would be seen through in a flash for the uncultured person you display here so readily. Perhaps your intended child bride will take some time to see through it, though.

David

[BC]

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=6241.msg113344;topicseen#msg113344

FWIW

[Jumper]

AJ, where are you at? Do you still think men here aren't flustered?

Still here? but I'll be gone a few weeks Billy..
I doubt you'll miss me.

Now you changed the original from *wound up* , to *flustered*,
so sure some might seem ,or even be , *flustered*
depending on your definition.

Overall Billy, i simply  posted my thoughts that the *give and take* here in your thread
 seems  fairly normal to me ,
and that i've seen equal or more *wound up* threads on a ford or chevy forum over which oil viscosity to use.
I'm not entirely sure why my casual observation has merited two or three responses.
  I moderate several forums billy ,not RW related,  i just don't find this stuff unusual.
It's just the nature internet fora ,it lends itself to people throwing out fairly controversial views , they can be emotional about it perhaps?
They can be *emotional in text* over which coffee is best or which coffee grinder for that matter.
but its my belief  that 2 seconds after the walk away from the keyboard its completely forgotten one way or another.

since you have an attachment to this thread..you'll naturally be more invested in it.
maybe you are right and some others truly are??
Maybe my time on other more volatile forums has jaded my perception to when someones wound up, much less truly flustered
who knows?
 who cares?
certainly you should not.

and I do think many take things too far , and have stated that in the past billy.

A is of legal age to marry ,its that simple.
She is your fiancee now and i certainly respect that.
I wish you both well ,and you know that.

 I also think some just see small discrepancies in your words and naturally give you grief about it since you are delivering this as a "how to".

as small example:
 in a post above you stated A comes from a long line of women who don't divorce.
Yet her mother is obviously divorced as you have stated this.

Now if you defend this by now saying her  grandmother and great grandmother were not divorced , it just comes off as weird to me?
none of my grandparents or great grandparents, both male or female ,were ever divorced,
some were married over 65 years ,even certificates from the US President commemorating and congratulating them.
but since my mother and father were divorced , i could hardly claim to come from a *long line* of  men or women who do not divorce.

Now to be clear,  I feel it has nothing what so ever to do with A's, or any ones,
 sincerity or commitment to the institution of marriage.
but  it's just as example of non attention to detail in your story..
that i think posters will point out..

does that make my frustrated or wound up?

heavens no billy,
it just one of a few things you say that make me go "hmmm"

 I take it in stride that you intended to state that   A has a good character and a background that
you believe  will keep her focused on family and marriage,
and that from your interaction with her you feel this way.

 Your basic premise  in this thread, i agree with and have often stated similar.
That I feel one of the largest key ingredients to finding the right person ,
is to first be the right person.
Everything after that generally falls into place ,if you have a lick of common sense.

Some posters are pointing out the men with the *Right Stuff* typically wouldn't date a
teenager.
You understandably endlessly defend your unusual position, by defining how great A's character is,
posters  can't know her, or know this.They can only see the current limited face to face time and the young age.

This is something , on any forum regarding this venture ,would be warned against,
 there has been some meanderings and unneeded attacks,...
but mostly  it's as simple as an old *tried and true* warning.

 Hey you are here to kick butt and chew bubble gum, and you are all out of  bubble gum..
So carry  on billy!!

[AsH]

What could you possibly have in common with this girl......................

[Gator]

Billy,

I don't read your thread, and just skim it infrequently.  I somehow noticed that you had quoted me from another thread.

You were in a couple of relationship with huge age gaps Gator. Was ignorance on the ladies part partially to blame for any breakups?

Only one huge age gap.   We  had a lot of fun together traveling the globe and hanging out in Moscow.  Best travel companion in the world, and really concerned about her children.  Billy, after marriage she changed quickly and remarkably even though I had known her 6 years.  Family and stability were important to her for so many years.  Her priorities changed.  She arrives in America, sees the opportunities, and decides to embark upon a career in real estate, leaving less time for "family" (she has two children who were 4 ans 5 when we first met.   Her decision was understandable as she had gone from dolls to babies and never accomplished anything professionally in her life.  She felt empty.  One problem, however, this was not fun for me and things were not improving. 

My ex- was 27 when we met and 33 when we married.  One factor in your favor is that "A" is so young it will take her some time to adjust to America and explore her choices.  Maybe you should find someone even younger. 
 

I think what is to blame may relate to character flaws and that can be had by anybody at any age.

I knew my ex-wife’s character.  The fact that we were able to live together amicably in the same house during the 5 months of divorce is testimony to that.  However, I knew she was relentless. I divorced because I knew it would not get better.  We went to family counseling, and the psychologist asked us to rate from 1 to 10 how much we wanted to save the marriage.    My ex- said "7" and I said "zero."  I explained that I knew the woman and it would be a waste of time to try.

One reason I don't like equal rights relationships is because the women rarely respects the man and has to take charge in numerous situations.

Billy, you have made some preposterous statements.  This one takes first prize. 

[TomT]

This deserves an honorable mention, at least:

For the most part, all men need is a pretty face and we're happy. Women need much more. If they want kids, they will take extra precaution to which man they want to bring into their lives, after all the man will be half the recipe of their kids. They don't want their kids to be dumb, ugly and weak. They want a winner who of course doesn't promote he's a winner but shows by action. They will decide for themselves who you are. Some of you may be insulted by what I'm saying but go and improve your personal hygiene, become physically fit and get educated, if not for yourself do it for the ladies and they will notice you a better man now than you once were. Pay more attention to your lady more than yourself. Very few family oriented women will accept a man in her life who lacks mental ability, morals, in poor physical health, and emotionally unstable or overly sensitive man.

[AsH]

Well said mate

[erudite]

Here is the theme song for this thread:

[dogspot]

I thought this was the theme song:

(listen to the lyrics)

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jItz-uNjoZA[/youtube]

[Gator]

Very few family oriented women will accept a man in her life who lacks mental ability, morals, in poor physical health, and emotionally unstable or overly sensitive man.

By saying "very few" you are giving women  more credit than they deserve.  Your guideline may account for a simple majority of women, yet I assert that there are many exceptions to your guideline because many women are not this analytical.  They were young and married a "beautiful" man.  The second husband is more like the man you described.

BTW, BillyB probably meets your guideline.  So.....?

[Ade]

By saying "very few" you are giving women  more credit than they deserve.  Your guideline may account for a simple majority of women, yet I assert that there are many exceptions to your guideline because many women are not this analytical.  They were young and married a "beautiful" man.  The second husband is more like the man you described.

BTW, BillyB probably meets your guideline.  So.....?

Tom was quoting Billy...

[Gator]

Tom was quoting Billy...

  This thread exceeds my comprehension ability.

[tim 360]

Maybe it needs a brief synopsis and ending?  Nah!  I think I know the epilogue.   

[Faux Pas]

Maybe it needs a brief synopsis and ending?  Nah!  I think I know the epilogue.   

It would appear that all except Billy knows the ending 

[Misha]

For the most part, all men need is a pretty face and we're happy.

Tom, more than a few men have divorced women with pretty faces  :evil: Personally, the mistake that I wanted to avoid was marrying a woman solely for a pretty face, as I learned that a woman with a pretty face is quite capable of making your life a living misery  Then again, perhaps this is the mistake that most men make....

[Turboguy]

It would appear that all except Billy knows the ending 

Many movies I see and many books I read have a surpise ending.  The question is will Billy be surprised or will the forum members be surprised.

Personally I am not so sure the ending will be what you are so sure of.

One way or the other since Billy has portrayed himself to be "The Man" I hope, however it ends up, good or bad that he is man enough to let us know.  We may or may not have a long wait for that ending but it will be intersting to see and I do hope it works out for Billy. 

[Faux Pas]

Many movies I see and many books I read have a surpise ending.  The question is will Billy be surprised or will the forum members be surprised.

Personally I am not so sure the ending will be what you are so sure of.

One way or the other since Billy has portrayed himself to be "The Man" I hope, however it ends up, good or bad that he is man enough to let us know.  We may or may not have a long wait for that ending but it will be intersting to see and I do hope it works out for Billy. 

Turbo, this isn't a movie or a book and I won't be surprised no matter how it works out. This girl is either very naive or very cunning. I think Billy will justly deserve everything he gets, whatever it is.

[TomT]

Tom, more than a few men have divorced women with pretty faces  :evil: Personally, the mistake that I wanted to avoid was marrying a woman solely for a pretty face, as I learned that a woman with a pretty face is quite capable of making your life a living misery   Then again, perhaps this is the mistake that most men make....

My bad; I failed to indicate that I was quoting Billy. I would be the last person to claim that all men need in a woman is a pretty face. (I would also be mortified that anyone would think that I use such poor grammar.)

[Turboguy]

Turbo, this isn't a movie or a book and I won't be surprised no matter how it works out. This girl is either very naive or very cunning. I think Billy will justly deserve everything he gets, whatever it is.

I have always felt that we create a lot of our own luck, good and bad.  That said, I agree that if he ends up with the happiest marriage on the planet he deserves it and if he ends up with a heartbreaking disaster he will have left himself open for it.  He certainly can't say no one warned him. 

I also think we need to be master of our own destiny and whatever Billy's destiny is, he was captain of the ship. 

Personally I think it will work out just fine.  After all he is the smartest, handsomest, most intelligent guy around and the best lover.  I am sure happiness awaits him.  Heck I can't wait to congratulate him on his 50th wedding anniversary. 

[I/O]

This girl is either very naive or very cunning.

I actually wouldn't be surprised if that's not correct, she doesn't need to be............................

[Turboguy]

Turbo, this isn't a movie or a book and I won't be surprised no matter how it works out.

Perhaps it is not a book or a movie FP, but many of the relationships I have had in my life and many I have seen talked about on RWD have a surpise ending.   Surprise endings are the norm.  Endings without a surprise are the unusual thing.

I can even look at my own marriage and really belive it "surprised" a lot of people that we ended up being very happy and with a wonderful marriage.