living in Ukraine for six months to one year

[ECOCKS]

FP:

It's probably another of those situations where typing is just so flat, making it difficult as to what the other is trying to express.

I understood your comment initially and this one as well.

What I am saying is maybe hard to hear but I'm trying to say don't be afraid to step out of the box you think you're inside.

I don't buy into the "I have never been able to...." construction. Challenge it a bit (if you want). Oh, I have child support, I have my note on my cabin at the lake, I have to pay off my boat; these are all things you chose to do. With the exception of child support you can sell your assets (whether you think you can or not unless restricted by contracts and even then wait for the contract to expire) and clear the decks and move pretty much where you take a mind to do so.

Yes, you probably CANNOT move to N. Korea and Iran might be unwise.  Even Canada has some paperwork if you want to buy a home there and live permanently while working. It's all a matter of weighing what YOU truly want and being sure you can accept the conditions and possible consequences, Hundreds of thousands of people live in other countries for long-term time periods and are happy and successful by their own (and many others' standards).

I'm just saying instead of approaching it with a "I can't...", try a "What would I have to do to..." frame of mind. No one has to but there's nothing wrong with living your dream as long as you accept the consequences and responsibilities.

[Faux Pas]

Ed

I agree. Perhaps I should have used the phrase "I won't". I have worked long and hard to reach my current station in life and it is because I wanted it. I certainly don't apologize for it and living abroad for the Tree frogs in the rain forest or the wonderful lady in the FSU was never an option because I won't.

True, I could sell my possessions, cash out and could live for a while doing something really different and have passion for it but, I won't. I am actually doing what I have the most passion for as I am.

[ECOCKS]

Ah, best re-title the thread, "In Search of Self-Actualization"

Ed

I agree. Perhaps I should have used the phrase "I won't". I have worked long and hard to reach my current station in life and it is because I wanted it. I certainly don't apologize for it and living abroad for the Tree frogs in the rain forest or the wonderful lady in the FSU was never an option because I won't.

True, I could sell my possessions, cash out and could live for a while doing something really different and have passion for it but, I won't. I am actually doing what I have the most passion for as I am.

[kievstar]

SMS, I re read what Brad wrote and just see two people spending face time together before someone leaves everything behind.  We tend to forget it is the woman who sells her apartment, quits her job, and leaves her family after meeting someone for 2-3 weeks.  In this case she wants to know what kind of man Brad is.  Makes perfect sense to me.  More women should require this and divorce rates would not be so high for RW and AM marriages. 

[brad5959]

See above.  

He already thinks she is the one but she has doubts. She dont want to leave. He must be the "ultra nice guy" to convince her. His description not mine. This involves all the "nice guy" manipulations to show how great he is. He becomes the submisive partner. Most women hate this. They lose respect for the man.

I could go on and on of why this is a bad idea.

The man builds the kingdom and the women becomes part of it. Not vice versa.

where do I say that I must be the ultra nice guy??  never said it, not going to happen.
"he becomes the submissive partner".  how do you extrapolate this?  so every guy that goes to live with his girlfriend for 1 to 3 months is now submissive??  is she submissive because she cooks, cleans, gives me an occasional massage and is a generous lover??  maybe she just likes me.  I like her too and am willing to do what I can to make her happy.  is that submissive, or just two people who care about each other?  the man builds the kingdom....not vice versa.  maybe they build the kingdom together.  SMS60 I think I read somewhere that you are against marriage because you got burned by an ex wife.  I empathize with you because I know that happens sometimes.  don't rain on my parade and I won't rain on yours.

[ECOCKS]

That said Brad, there is some reason for the cautionary advice from some to just be sure you are being honest with yourself on your motives and expectations.

If you are (honest with yourself...), great, let the advice you choose to pass on roll off your back. It's happened to others, maybe they just honestly want to make sure you're not going into this with your eyes wide shut.

[SMS60]

thanks!!  I got a good laugh out of that!!

I agree some things on this site are a hoot

I change my opinion and think it is a good idea for you to spend 6 months in Ukraine. I actually think a year would be better to get a good feel of things. Please disregard my previous opinion.

[Gylden]

Let's face it, the whole experience of even meeting foreign people, much less marrying/dating one is an adventurous endeavor. Full of learning experiences and "eye openers". IMO people who even consider this option, have demonstrated an attitude of at the very least, curiosity. Curiosity is a "door opener" to knowledge and discovery, not only about the world in general, but also about ones self. The day you stop learning is the day you die.

The only thing that is better in this adventure to getting on the plane for a visit, is to get on the plane to experience living elsewhere for a while. What an exhilarating experience. Sort of like what those astronauts, who upon looking back at the earth from the moon felt.

For anyone who can pull it off, I say go for it!!
 

[brad5959]

thanks Gylden,

I have already lived with the lady for two weeks in her flat.  so going back for a further visit is just a logical progression.

I remember when I went to West Germany for the first time as a young soldier.  boy was that an eye opener and a fun experience!

[Ivan Kropiva]

Find more information about Ukrainian visas and terms of stay in Ukraine on this web: http://mainvisa.com.ua/en/step_4_guest/