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Author Topic: hotel refunds  (Read 15505 times)

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Offline 10bdub

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hotel refunds
« on: August 17, 2010, 10:54:57 AM »
i planned on flying to Kiev August 18.  I developed a sinus/allergy infection and could not make the trip.  I planned on visiting a lady I have been chatting with on Skype for the past 6 months.  I informed the lady August 10 I could not make the trip.  She tells me she had paid $579 for a hotel/apartment for the dates of August 18-24.  She says it is impossible for her to get a refund.  She has asked me to send her $579 by western union.  What do you people think.  Scam?

Offline kievstar

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2010, 11:02:11 AM »
Did you have her pay for the hotel or was it an apartment.  If it was a hotel you can get the money back more than likely.  If it is an apartment she is correct and time for you to pay up.  Next time best you pay and not the lady.

 

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2010, 11:04:40 AM »
I never asked her to pay.  I told her I would pay when I arrived.  I know I will never know the truth....I am happy to reimburse her if I feel she is being honest.  But, I don't want to send someone I've never met $579 simply because they ask me to.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2010, 11:09:25 AM »
RWD 10 commandments.....#1 - never send money to someone you have never met.   Please understand, I don't want to "stick" her with the bill, but I don't want to be scammed.

Offline facetrock

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2010, 11:13:22 AM »
  My experience is that I always paid when I got there. The lady always reserved the flat for me. It could be they want money now because they couldnt rent it out for the week you wern't there. They want there loss of revenue. Its possible the owners are threatening the lady that she has to pay for the week.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2010, 11:16:37 AM »
thank you both for your replies.  I guess I have tough decision to make.

Offline Boethius

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2010, 11:19:19 AM »
Can you contact the hotel/apartment owner?  If you plan on travelling another time, they may be willing to accomodate you.
True love begins when nothing is looked for in return.  Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Offline Sculpto

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2010, 11:19:49 AM »
thank you both for your replies.  I guess I have tough decision to make.

Dont send it.  And consider yourself lucky you got sick.. she was gonna take you shopping for sure... ;)

Offline Boethius

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #8 on: August 17, 2010, 11:25:56 AM »
But facetrock is right, the lady may have been threatened.

What city is this in?  Does the lady live in the same city the apartment/hotel was rented in?  I doubt she shelled out $579.
True love begins when nothing is looked for in return.  Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Offline kievstar

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #9 on: August 17, 2010, 11:30:52 AM »
I think Sculpto is probably right.  

Did you tell her to reserve the apartment or hotel - also is it a hotel or an apartment?  In Ukraine hotels will give your money back if you cancel in time.  8 day notice is plenty of time.

You have been talking via skype for 6 months - any strange behavior you noticed?

One last question how old is this girl?

Online Faux Pas

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #10 on: August 17, 2010, 11:36:43 AM »
This IMO, would largely depend on what conversation(s) transpired between you and the woman. Up until the moment you decided you were not going, what was the plan for paying for the flat? Did that suddenly change when you informed her you were not going? Did you communicate with her directly or through an agency? What was your correspondence like for 6 months?

IME, highly unlikely she prepaid for your flat. If she did and paid more than 1 day deposit she ain't playing with a full deck.

IMO, it sounds like a fleece

Offline facetrock

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2010, 11:42:34 AM »
  I am not so sure its a scam. If she reserved the flat with the promise you would pay upon arrival and then you dont show, the owner might have had the chance to rent it out if she hadn't reserved it. Now the owner wants his lost money and believe it or not he could take her to court there and win.
  I dont think she wants to tell you that part. Its possible she did pay a small down payment but that would probably be for only a day.

Online GQBlues

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2010, 11:52:47 AM »
You had been corresponding with a woman for the past 6 months. You were comfortable enough to make plans and visit this woman during that time. You more than likely condoned this woman to go ahead make arrangement and reservation for your accomodation as a convenience to you.

Due to circumstances you laid out to this forum, you can't make the scheduled rendezvous and notified this woman 8 days prior to your arrival. Presumably this lady never asked you for the money beforehand, and likely is left holding the bag if she did in fact had obligated herself, for your convenience, to reserve the accomodation.

Now all of the sudden you are skeptcal of this woman's sincerity and honesty - and worst, would rather 'trust' strangers in the internet who were provided with a very short version of YOUR story.

Sorry, IMHO $579 seem rather a small fee to pay this lady for bothering her with your nonsense the past 6 months - IN ADDITION to an apology.

Then after that, just leave her alone.

add: $579 works out to be about $82.72/day. Those numbers to me seem rather 'abstract' for some silly scamming scheme.
« Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 11:58:35 AM by GQBlues »
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #13 on: August 17, 2010, 12:18:22 PM »
She tells me she had paid $579 for a hotel/apartment for the dates of August 18-24.  She says it is impossible for her to get a refund.  

First of all she must have the documents confirming the payment.

Do not send money without documents first.
« Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 12:21:02 PM by OlgaH »

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #14 on: August 17, 2010, 12:54:38 PM »
here is an update.  I have spent the last hour talking with this lady.  She continues to ask me to send her money through Western Union.  I have told her many times I will not go through Western Union.  I have asked her for the phone number to the "private" apartment ( evidently it is not a hotel ) and she refuses to give me the number.  She says they would not understand me.  I told her I have a friend who speaks Russian and this will not be a problem.  She says it is too late in the day.  I told her I will contact them tomorrow at 09:00 Kiev time.  She says this is not acceptable.

Yes, we have communicated via Skype for 6 months.  She seems honest, but there are red flags.  She says she has a job...I have seen pictures of her at company website.  But, I talk with her for 2 hours 4 or 5 days a week at different times.  I have always been curious as to when she could sleep, work or take care of her 2 children and talk with me at such different times of the day and night.  Also, in 6 months, I have only seen her in live video 1 time.  I have used my pc video consistently.  She says she does not have a pc camera and can not afford one.  Ok, I believe this.  The one time I saw her in video she said was from a cafe. 

She lives in Dnepropetrovsk.  We were to meet in Kiev.  She has told me she is considering moving back to Kiev as her father lives in a community about 2 hours from Kiev. 

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #15 on: August 17, 2010, 12:57:22 PM »
continued from previous post.......  Bottom line, I would be happy to send her the money if this is legit.  But, in my way of thinking, if she is spent $579 would she not be willing to spend a few dollars ( which I would be happy to reimburse ) to scan a copy of the receipt and email this to me.  Come on, I don't think I am being unreasonable.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #16 on: August 17, 2010, 01:08:37 PM »
one last comment....Our conversation ended as follows......She said, "no other men have made me cry like this.  I will consider this as a lesson learned".  I said, "it is your choice.  Provide me with a copy of the bill and I will reimburse you immediately".  I have not received another message from her and I will not try to contact her again.  I am ready, willing and able to pay, but I will not subject myself to being scammed.  Maybe she is being 100% honest and I will lose contact with someone I have been chatting with for 6 months.  I don't want to appear to be cold hearted, I am trying to understand her point of view.  But, it seems unreasonable.  Maybe it's just a difference in the way business is conducted in Ukraine and America.

Btw, I flew to Dnepropetrovsk in Summer of 2008 to meet a lady I met through russianlovematch.  I believe this was a scam.  That said, this was the greatest experience of my life, flying to a foreign country where I do not speak the language and meet a lady in person with whom I met over the internet.  I am 42 years old, never married, no children so I have very little responsibilities and I continue to want to go to Dnepropetrovsk or Kiev and teach english on a 11 month contract.  Anyone here know anyone who has done this?

Offline ECOCKS

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #17 on: August 17, 2010, 01:12:40 PM »
Maybe I missed it but if this is an apartment there probably won't be a receipt to scan, assuming she can find a scanner. If she CAN find a scanner, why does she have so much trouble finding a webcam? If she has $579 to spend on an apt. upfront, why hasn't she bought a webcam for this 6 month relationship yet? Seems odd.

What work does she do that she is on the company's website but not at work during the day?

I have always been able to rent apartments by no more than one day's rent and promising to pay the rest on arrival.

Hindsight is 20-20 but this is why the rule exists on money. Should have kept her out of the loop on the payment side and now you're in a tough spot. I would also think you could move the reservation if it is a reputable apt company.

Good luck!
Pick and choose carefully among the advice offered and consider the source carefully. PM, Skype or email if you care to chat or discuss

Online Faux Pas

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #18 on: August 17, 2010, 02:11:07 PM »
She wouldn't give you the direct number to the apt. owner is a tale-tell IMO.

You have to make the call there dub. Nobody here knows the degree of communication you had with this lady. If you had asked her to find and secure the flat, then thats another matter. According to you, you didn't. Where were you planning to stay 8 days ago? It all sounds pretty flakey to me. You might find out by telling her you changed your mind and are indeed coming.  What's the address?

Online GQBlues

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #19 on: August 17, 2010, 02:33:58 PM »
I've rented apartments many times in the FSU and never got a 'bill'. It would've been a very easy thing for this woman to just give him a 'fake' name and number just to pretend she/he is the owner of the apartment if this was an eleborate scheme to scam this guy. Maybe she's too dumb to think her scamming ways through, or just dumb enough to get involve with him in the first place.

Now all of the sudden the OP is interested doing an 11-month language teaching tour in the same place instead of speaking with this woman and telling her maybe to postpone the meeting 1 or 2 weeks later. But no....

Whatever I say. It's all yours folks....
« Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 02:37:57 PM by GQBlues »
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #20 on: August 17, 2010, 03:00:00 PM »
yes, i have bent over backwards.  I have asked for us to meet at a later date.  she says this is impossible.  I think this thread is taking a life of it's own.  ;D  I appreciate the feedback from everyone.  maybe it gives others something to think about.  Good luck to all.

Offline OlgaH

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #21 on: August 17, 2010, 03:03:09 PM »
If she has $579 to spend on an apt. upfront, why hasn't she bought a webcam for this 6 month relationship yet? Seems odd.

I also find it to be odd that a mother of two children can not afford a web-camera but finds $579 to pay in advance (without any guarantees) for an apartment in other city that is 5-10 hours by train (depends on a train) from her city.

Offline SMS60

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #22 on: August 17, 2010, 03:04:47 PM »
Fork over her contact information. I will get a hold of her and find out whats going on. No need making a mountain out of a mole hill.

Quote from: Simoni on Today at 09:06:15 AM
But my understanding is that "Anything Goes" does not really mean "anything" if that "anything" violates the TOS.

Offline 10bdub

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #23 on: August 17, 2010, 03:09:15 PM »
thanks for the comedy.  funniest post of the day.

Offline tim 360

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Re: hotel refunds
« Reply #24 on: August 17, 2010, 03:38:35 PM »
I also find it to be odd that a mother of two children can not afford a web-camera but finds $579 to pay in advance (without any guarantees) for an apartment in other city that is 5-10 hours by train (depends on a train) from her city.

Agree.  She can plunk down $579 for your apartment but--can't afford to buy a cheap ole webcam for your 6 months of talky/talky but $579 is no problem.  And "impossible" to see you another time?  You are being played for a sucker because you have been a sucker.  Where's PT Barnum when you need him.

C'mon admit it.  Something smells and you ain't innocent just because you were stupid.  Can't believe you wasted 6 months of constant talking to this person who has also got a job and two kids?  Honestly,  she really wants the $579 because she spent all that time talking to you nearly everyday.  Do some reading here before emailing and Skype.
"Never argue with a fool,  onlookers may not be able to tell the difference".  Mark Twain

 

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