Its mostly about finding a wealthy westerner, isn't it? :)

[acrzybear]

Being a narcissist and extremely intense is probably also a result of me having fought tooth and nails for everything that I got, and I did it (more or less) alone. I studied alone, I worked out alone, and I succeeded alone:As I've pointed out I have the attitude that everything I produce, every subpoena, every trial, every letter I send out, should bear the mark of quality through and through. If there's room for improvement then it must be improved. Always.

As for my training, I go at it with the same intensity.
I severely tore my groin muscle during a work out that actually made a ripping sound that could be heard 10 yards away. The pain was unbelievable. I recovered and came back stronger. Alone.

I busted both my knees and could hardly even walk a flight of stairs for 18 months, but I refused to give up and I came back. Alone.

In May I tore 40% of my chest muscle in half - all the way from the attachment in my elbow to the center of my chest and I ended up in the emergency room and couldn't even move my arm over my head for several weeks (while looking like I had been in a car crash from all the internal bleeding). I'm still not back in the shape that I was, but I force myself to bench press with that torn muscle four days a week and I hope to make a full recovery in January - about 7-8 months after the injury. Alone.
I put myself through all of this to become (one of) the best at what I do, both in the courtroom and in the gym..

Andreas
Unless you find the perfect stepford trophy wife you will have a tough time making your marriage sucessful with this attitude.  You strike me as a very controling person that wants everything done your way, and although that might work in the business enviroment it doesn't work so well with a relationship. However there are women out there that would be content with the husband making all of the decisions/money and playing the hostess and mother role for a higher standard standard of living.

[Andreas]

Andreas
Unless you find the perfect stepford trophy wife you will have a tough time making your marriage sucessful with this attitude.  You strike me as a very controling person that wants everything done your way, and although that might work in the business enviroment it doesn't work so well with a relationship. However there are women out there that would be content with the husband making all of the decisions/money and playing the hostess and mother role for a higher standard standard of living.

Well, there are certain areas where I don't compromise. A woman must accept that I work a lot and that I spend a lot of time in the gym, but I don't see myself as unyielding in other areas. I hardly ever get into arguments with my buddies, and I believe that I have these certain areas of my life where I need complete dedication and the rest I leave up to whatever my potential GF/wife would like (more or less) - where to live, what sort of home to buy, where to go on vacation etc.
If I had a wife with strong opinions on these matters she would most likely get her way (unless her suggestion is outright absurd, like going on vacation in North Korea, or wanting to start a family in an underground cave or something. ).

[Miri22]

The point is you may not always have your health, your job, your money and your lifestyle but do you have a relationship capable of withstanding that.. In a tent or cave will you have the bond with your wife that can work through devastating times..

[Turboguy]

Well when I think back to when I first started posting here and was in the searching stage a lot of the men suggested when your woman arrives that you need to give up most of your outside activities and really devote time to her.  I can't say I have done that totally but some of that is that my wife has enough activities that keep her busy (mostly schoolwork) that she is ok with me working a lot but I do think that with a lot of women who are leaving everyone they know behind and going to be totally dependent on you for a while you need to be prepared to give things up and spend time with her.

It is good that you have done all those things ALONE.  You can be proud of yourself.  If you are going to persue a RW and then leave her while you spend all your free time doing your things you might find yourself adding sex to the things you do ALONE.

[GQBlues]

....Let me explain:

....Yeah, I've always been a fanatic. Its what brought me where I am.
Being a narcissist and extremely intense is probably also a result of me having fought tooth and nails for everything that I got, and I did it (more or less) alone. I studied alone, I worked out alone, and I succeeded alone:
----
As for my training, I go at it with the same intensity.
I severely tore my groin muscle during a work out that actually made a ripping sound that could be heard 10 yards away. The pain was unbelievable. I recovered and came back stronger. Alone.
-----
I busted both my knees and could hardly even walk a flight of stairs for 18 months, but I refused to give up and I came back. Alone.
-----
In May I tore 40% of my chest muscle in half - all the way from the attachment in my elbow to the center of my chest and I ended up in the emergency room and couldn't even move my arm over my head for several weeks (while looking like I had been in a car crash from all the internal bleeding). I'm still not back in the shape that I was, but I force myself to bench press with that torn muscle four days a week and I hope to make a full recovery in January - about 7-8 months after the injury. Alone.
-----
I put myself through all of this to become (one of) the best at what I do, both in the courtroom and in the gym. Am I then supposed to pretend that the "average Joe" who spends his life with a beer can in one hand and remote control in the other is my equal?
------
Thanks, although don't expect any progress anytime soon.

Impressive Andreas. Kudos...

Being alone is wonderful thing as well pointed out above...why ruin it?

[Gator]

Andreas,

I see some of myself in you.  At your age I was doing the same at the office.  That was just a start, and I became even more intense and dedicated.  When 35 three of us started a company that grew to 3,000 employees (mostly MS and PhD degrees) in 10 years.  I worked 60 hours per week generating sales, hiring people to do the work, assuring high quality results, and balancing cash flow.   Here is the key difference from you - afterwards I came home to a loving family.  I did not go to the gym because I wanted to go home.  I think I had my cake and ate it too, although my sports suffered (with me it was tennis, not lifting).

So what to do?  A particular type of RW is probably a good choice for you. However, RW can be different as night and day so don't  stereotype them with such lines as all they want is a wealthy Westerner.  After all, we can tell that not all Norwegian men are the same (e. g., you and SJ) so why should RW be the same.

Thus, you need to spend time to search the RW pool using agency listings, dating sites, etc.  Then you need to screen them with telephone conversations.  However, you don't have time to do this.  So retain someone like Eduard who will do the searching and screening  for a reasonable fee.

So Eduard does his work.  Does that mean you will get the woman of your dreams?  You can not put a collar on her and bring her home.  The good RW are challenges.  You must win her heart. 

I put myself through all of this to become (one of) the best at what I do, both in the courtroom and in the gym. Am I then supposed to pretend that the "average Joe" who spends his life with a beer can in one hand and remote control in the other is my equal?

With regard to women he may be more than your equal.  He can use charm and fun to make a woman happy.  Can you?

I deserve the hot chick waiting for me when I got home from job, dammit!

A man usually gets what he deserves.  Clue:  what you have  got so far (not much you say) is an indication of what you deserve based on the total you.  My ex-AW wife selected me because I was the only man she knew who had  a good job and made life fun.  She was hot with all sort of pursuers from a Philly starting pitcher to a Supreme Court practicing attorney.  We were married for 25 years.

those skinny Swedish party boys are nuisance. They are just so f-ing metrosexual. What the hell does anyone seen in them.

Next time ask some women around these boys.  The answer will be enlightening. Part of the answer is fun and charm, yet there is more.

Again, good luck!   

[Andreas]

Impressive Andreas. Kudos...

Being alone is wonderful thing as well pointed out above...why ruin it?

I think you're missing the point, which is that my so-called intense personality is a result of me getting to where I am by being a bit of a fanatic.

[GQBlues]

....my so-called intense personality is a result of me getting to where I am by being a bit of a fanatic.

Understood pretty well. But considering what you stated, including the type of demeanor you say you have, it would appear to me that RWs in your neck of the wood will be the perfect chase for you. They will definitely be far more of a challenge, but then you've negotiated far more challenging things in your life well enough, according to you.

The likelihood RWs in your home country is already aware, adjusted, and likely more accepting to the type of lifestyle you have - is a given. Hence, you've already eliminated the rigors of introducing one who will likely not be as versed to your daily life demands. Negating any possible miscalculation from either of you.

For one thing, considering you said your time schedule is pretty full and limited, this will undoubtedly cut your search and travel time nicely. They're all around you already.

[ECOCKS]

You don't by any chance know a guy named Ambach do you?

[Jumper]

When I grew up I was constantly told (in school, by parents, by TV etc.) that if you worked hard, stayed away from drugs, got an education etc. that it would be rewarded. Now I've spent every god damn minute of my waking life the last 10 years working hard to become a trial lawyer, and an elite level power lifter, and I deserve the hot chick waiting for me when I got home from job, dammit!

Hmm ,this comes across as Entitlement attitude at its finest?

I'm not sure you meant it the way it sounds..

If some RW displayed even half the 'tude you have in that particular post ,every man here would understand clearly why she is single.

In all those years you din't notice that the very first rule is:
Life isn't fair, get over it?

Very few ,if any , women of any nationality really care why you feel entitled to thier attention or emotions.
the very premise is just odd.
I would think as long as you view a relationship from this direction , the scrawny party boys will attract just as many or more women.
(odd it pisses you off since you already said you had no troubles finding female attention)

Instead these girls hang out with "exciting" drug dealers from Marroco, or "fun" party boys from Sweden who works for minimum wage as bartenders so they wouldn't have to get a real job.

you answer your own questions?

Most young women of any nationality would prefer to date and yes marry a man they can have fun with and enjoy being around, over a  succesful man who they might feel values himself a bit too much.

Most studies show time and again women value a man that can make them laugh..or share thier sense of humor,
more than almost any other single trait.
Granted you don't need to be a comedean, and certainly it would be a turn off for some women.

God damn, those skinny Swedish party boys are nuisance. They are just so f-ing metrosexual. What the hell does anyone seen in them. *Shakes head in disbelief"

For a succesful young lawyer, why any local man would be annoying at all , is weird.

You can bury your head in the sand,
insist that being arrogant doesn't mean you arn't *right*.

or perhaps approach it in a different way?
Whatever you are currently doing hasn't produced the desired result,
you are obviously annoyed at others..that are dating women you wouldn't want to date anyway!
 right?


1.There may not be a *right* or *wrong*
but if what you are doing isn't bringing the results you want,,pretty basic thought is to chasnge something.

this wouldnt mean becomeing a party boy metrosexual.. 

2. You are not entitled to another human beings affections.
hard work, success, being an elite athelete,
is only a value unto itself, it can create and enviroment where miore womern might have initial interest,
vbut will not, and does not, gurantee any success at all  in your personal life relationship wise.
(ever notice how many hollywood stars or rockstars have horrible personal lives or commit suicide over a lost love?)


3. If you have everything going for you, (you seemingly do)
then SOMETHING is turning the women you prefer off from long term relationships with you.
it isn't them, it isn't anyone else,, its you. something you need to see or work on,  noone knows better what it might be than yourself.



 You come across as sucessful and reasonable,

but also as a muscle head pissed off the at the scrawny computer geek , party duuuude, whom somehow caught the prom queen.

Live with the fact, no matter how distasteful it might be to you, that THEY had something you do not.
it's the root of your annoyance afterall.

For someone successful, young, and in shape, wanting a family and lasting relationship , all positives,
you need to face some other realities as well..
You seem to have zero time right now for an international relationship.
you admit you cant make it to even nearby st pete more than a couple weekends in 6 to 10 months?
It's going to be very hard to build a relationship..
 

You seem to expect that your hard work is done,
and that a perfect relationship should just materialize, and you go about your normal work, and work out routine while enjoying as great womans company..

A good physique and good job, is not enough,
you seem to realize this ,that its only an initial attractivenes advantage, but expect a different result.

I do beleive you have worked very hard. Some here do understand the dedication and shear hours it takes to be a true athelete, or sucessful at the higher level in any sport.

If you worked that hard ,and single mindedly at being successful in relationships, i'm certain you would be!! If its something you truly wanted.

On the surface here, it seems you expect to attract  women with the perfect portfolio and perfect physique,
and you will, but maybe finding they arn't the women you actually seek.

is it that hard to see why?

[Shostakovich]

Music to rip a muscle to ...

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tczU6OWoUkI[/youtube]

That's the thing about the path less traveled -- it's less traveled.  Take it from Shosty!

[I/O]

Andreas: The original supposition/s are that for a RW it is about finding a wealthy westerner and moving to the west. Suppose I / we told you that was 100% correct? What then?

[DKMM]

Women, no matter where they are from, want a guy who has money but not if he has to work 70 hour weeks to get it.  This is over generalization but very true.  A man cannot serve two masters.

[Gator]

A man cannot serve two masters.

 

Words from a married young man, who is involved in a family owned business and has no children either(?).

When in my 30s and 40s I was growing a business and a family at the same time.  I had partners in my business and a partner at home.  My business benefited from the partner I had at home.  She was independent  and not demanding, and she took care of the daily routine.  She even unseated a clogged toilet by herself to retrieve a rubber duckie.   I showed up when told for soccer games, birthdays, Boy Scouts, dinner, the math homework, etc. 

Compare that with a RW.  When I re-married 2 1/2 years ago, I had long been retired from working in business.  Also, I had known the woman and her two young children for 6 years.  So one would think I had plenty of time.  No way! 

I gave up trips to the gym and a couple of my hobbies.  But not golf (some things take precedence).  Home life was not what I expected; we could not resolve the differences, and the trend line was headed downward.  We soon parted ways.

So Andreas, take care about the values, goals and personality of whom you bring home (if you get that far).

   

[Faux Pas]

I couldn't call Andreas a racist at this point but, my thoughts run parallel with SJ and AJ. He's going to have a difficult time finding a quality woman. He'll find some certainly but, unlikely he'll find a quality woman and keep her with his narcissistic mind frame. He is "all about me" and IME, that really doesn't seem to foster a relationship with any woman. If a relationship doesn't work for both parties it will cease to be a relationship. Doesn't appear Andreas is willing to invest the demanded time and unselfishness required to start a long term relationship, much less maintain one.

[JR]

I wanted to see if the attitude of RW changed once they hit Norwegian soil, though, which it seems to have done I'm afraid.

No, their attitude never changed, the core values of a person rarely changes once in adulthood. A person "changes" before your eyes because they are removing the mask they wore to get what they wanted.

[Daveman]

No, there attitude never changed, core values of a person rarely change once in adulthood. A person "changes" before your eyes because they are removing the mask they wore to get what they wanted.

And there it is.... 

[Andreas]

Understood pretty well. But considering what you stated, including the type of demeanor you say you have, it would appear to me that RWs in your neck of the wood will be the perfect chase for you. They will definitely be far more of a challenge, but then you've negotiated far more challenging things in your life well enough, according to you.

The likelihood RWs in your home country is already aware, adjusted, and likely more accepting to the type of lifestyle you have - is a given. Hence, you've already eliminated the rigors of introducing one who will likely not be as versed to your daily life demands. Negating any possible miscalculation from either of you.

For one thing, considering you said your time schedule is pretty full and limited, this will undoubtedly cut your search and travel time nicely. They're all around you already.

A logical and well-deducted conclusion, GQBlues.
I have also come to the conclusion that my current situation just doesn't mix with the project of finding a RW in Russia. The problem is that Norway has about 4.5 million citizens scattered over an area about as large as Germany. This means that the amount of available women in any given area is limited; this includes RW. I think I've tried to reach about 50 or so through singles.ru with very limited results.

[Andreas]

Andreas,

I see some of myself in you. 

I choose to take that as a compliment.

At your age I was doing the same at the office.  That was just a start, and I became even more intense and dedicated.  When 35 three of us started a company that grew to 3,000 employees (mostly MS and PhD degrees) in 10 years.  I worked 60 hours per week generating sales, hiring people to do the work, assuring high quality results, and balancing cash flow.   Here is the key difference from you - afterwards I came home to a loving family.  I did not go to the gym because I wanted to go home.  I think I had my cake and ate it too, although my sports suffered (with me it was tennis, not lifting).

My idea was that if I met the right girl I would get a house, work out at home and adapt my training routine to fit in with the relationship. When we decide to start a family, I would probably cut back on work and maybe do a little work in the weekends or such in order to avoid the 10 hour days that I have going most of the time now.

So what to do?  A particular type of RW is probably a good choice for you. However, RW can be different as night and day so don't  stereotype them with such lines as all they want is a wealthy Westerner.  After all, we can tell that not all Norwegian men are the same (e. g., you and SJ) so why should RW be the same.

In the defence of Norwgians it should be noted that SJ is a foreigner. I think he's British (poor guy).

Thus, you need to spend time to search the RW pool using agency listings, dating sites, etc.  Then you need to screen them with telephone conversations.  However, you don't have time to do this.  So retain someone like Eduard who will do the searching and screening  for a reasonable fee.

So Eduard does his work.  Does that mean you will get the woman of your dreams?  You can not put a collar on her and bring her home.  The good RW are challenges.  You must win her heart. 

That still leaves me with the problem of finding the time to visit her frequently, but such an approach definitely makes things less problematic.

With regard to women he may be more than your equal.  He can use charm and fun to make a woman happy.  Can you?

I've always been one of those guys that make people laugh rather easily. Thus I always try to make our secretaries giggle at least twice a day (especially a cute little thing that I usually refer to as "little miss bunny rabbit" (she responds well to this pet name, actually ). She is of course involved with....a Swede (WTF!!!  )

A man usually gets what he deserves. 

I disagree.
Look at Stalin, Lenin, Che Guevara etc.
A lot of the sick people responsible for the suffering in Cambodia got away, not to mention Robert Mugabe.

Again, good luck!   

Thanks!

[Andreas]

In all those years you din't notice that the very first rule is:
Life isn't fair, get over it?

I know. Which is why I never assume that things will "work themselves out" or that "good things happen to good people". In my experience you have to be prepared to fight hard as hell to get what you want; and even then you might end up with less than you "deserve". According to a lot of women, this attitude makes me seem bitter and condescending. They might have a point.

(odd it pisses you off since you already said you had no troubles finding female attention)
you answer your own questions?

I have....let's say - less problems finding women for sex than for a relationship. A girl doesn't have to be marriage material in order to be "sex material".
I wouldn't go as far as to say I get laid easily, though, but it could be worse.

Most studies show time and again women value a man that can make them laugh..or share thier sense of humor,
more than almost any other single trait.
Granted you don't need to be a comedean, and certainly it would be a turn off for some women.

I've always been one of those guys that make people laugh pretty easily. When I went to (the Norwegian version of) high school a hot chick in my class used to say I should consider being a full-time comedian. She dated a criminal Pakistani scum-of-the-earth kind of guy, by the way. 

For a succesful young lawyer, why any local man would be annoying at all , is weird.

I'm stressed out, over-worked, sleep deprived and tired. This makes my cranky and irritable; and therefore people (in general) piss me off nowadays. 

You come across as sucessful and reasonable,

but also as a muscle head pissed off the at the scrawny computer geek , party duuuude, whom somehow caught the prom queen.

Well, this might be because i am a muscle head who is pissed off at the party duuuude.
What's wrong with being that guy?

you need to face some other realities as well..
You seem to have zero time right now for an international relationship.
you admit you cant make it to even nearby st pete more than a couple weekends in 6 to 10 months?
It's going to be very hard to build a relationship..

Yup

You seem to expect that your hard work is done,
and that a perfect relationship should just materialize, and you go about your normal work, and work out routine while enjoying as great womans company..

A simplfication, but yeah, kind of.

A good physique and good job, is not enough,

Well, I've also got a penis the size of a base ball bat. That ought to seal the deal, I think.
Did I mention a wonderful (yet immature) sense of humor?

[Andreas]

Music to rip a muscle to ...

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tczU6OWoUkI[/youtube]

That's the thing about the path less traveled -- it's less traveled.  Take it from Shosty!

That is a kick-ass song, though.

[Andreas]

Andreas: The original supposition/s are that for a RW it is about finding a wealthy westerner and moving to the west. Suppose I / we told you that was 100% correct? What then?

I wouldn't spend/waste more time reading articles about RW on-line or reading trip reports.

[Andreas]

I couldn't call Andreas a racist at this point but, my thoughts run parallel with SJ and AJ. He's going to have a difficult time finding a quality woman. He'll find some certainly but, unlikely he'll find a quality woman and keep her with his narcissistic mind frame. He is "all about me" and IME, that really doesn't seem to foster a relationship with any woman. If a relationship doesn't work for both parties it will cease to be a relationship. Doesn't appear Andreas is willing to invest the demanded time and unselfishness required to start a long term relationship, much less maintain one.

Your deduction is fair enough taking into account your limited knowledge of me.
I know of a lot of "intense" powerlifters who have slowly gotten a more "mellow" personality (in lack of a better word) after meeting a woman, though.
I personally think I would be less "pissed off at the world" if I had the right type of woman, but I'm definitely a person who demands a lot from a potential GF/wife, just as I demand a lot of myself.

Right now my attitude is that I have nothing in my life expect what I have built myself through hard work. Thus I have nothing to be humble or grateful towards others for having, either. This might be narcissistic or even outright misanthropic, but that's just the way I feel, these days.

[Andreas]

No, their attitude never changed, the core values of a person rarely changes once in adulthood. A person "changes" before your eyes because they are removing the mask they wore to get what they wanted.

You're absolutely right, I should have chosen my words better.
I actually studied psychology one year while writing my master thesis at the faculty of law (I wrapped up my thesis early and had to fill my time with something while waiting for it to be graded).
I remember reading that core personality is more or less "set" at age 25 or thereabout. Also, its worth noting that the differences in human IQ and personality is roughly 50% due to genetics. This should be taken into consideration before marrying a hot chick with an inflatable brain (or for women seeking out the thrill of a criminal boyfriend).

[I/O]

I wouldn't spend/waste more time reading articles about RW on-line or reading trip reports.

I think that would be a wise choice.