Re: She wants me to guarantee her security in the US before she comes...

[rambler]

If you put a property in her name she can divorce you and still get half of YOUR assets plus the apartment, plus alimony and child support. Given that kind of reward the temptation will be irresistible.

[Gator]

What's a ball bag?

Container for family jewels.

[Muzh]

If you put a property in her name she can divorce you and still get half of YOUR assets plus the apartment, plus alimony and child support. Given that kind of reward the temptation will be irresistible.

First thing I did was to put the house on both our names and named her the beneficiary of my pension/insurance. Literally, every asset I had was now ours.
 
That was 14 years ago.
 
Surprise, we are still married.

[tfcrew]

If you put a property in her name she can divorce you and still get half of YOUR assets plus the apartment, plus alimony and child support. Given that kind of reward the temptation will be irresistible.

Now what planet is this on?

[tfcrew]

First thing I did was to put the house on both our names and named her the beneficiary of my pension/insurance. Literally, every asset I had was now ours.
 
 

In Texas, it all is anyway.

[ML]

In Texas, it all is anyway.

Really?

I thought there was the concept of 'assets acquired before vs assets acquired after' marriage.

[Paulie]

Hello Everyone,

Well it is DONE, OVER, FINISHED.   I literally kicked her to the curb.  I finally had enough.  I always knew on an intellectual level this was not going to work.  It was the emotional level in which I was not 'sober' enough to get past the alluring nature of this grifter, this gold-digger. 

I want to thank each and everyone of you for your kindness, thoughtful comments and your continual support and not booting me off of here because I was being so intransigent for not taking everyone's advice. 

My friends, family and even business associates are relieved.  I am actually realizing how much energy has been sapped from me by this evil woman.  She is beauty and the beast:  beauty on the outside and a beast on the inside...a soulless individual as vacuous as they come. Oh she is charming alright, but revolting on the turn of a dime.

I really had a hard and expensive lesson - emotionally, spiritually, psychologically and financially.  Thankfully I came to my senses.  Otherwise I would have been broke - not financially but physically.  This definitively has affected my health. 

Time for a break at this point.  I will now move forward and seek time to heal.  Then I will begin to lay the groundwork to find a woman who has a heart, is kind, grateful, patient and compassionate.   

I will stay close to this site.  Thanks again!   

[Gator]

Well it is DONE, OVER, FINISHED.   

Thank goodness.   

I literally kicked her to the curb.

 

Perhaps sounds harsh to some, yet EXORCISMS are never gentle.   


IMO, it was not only justifiable, it was the only way a man with your gentle and empathetic ways could rid yourself of such women. 

[Gator]

Time for a break at this point.  I will now move forward and seek time to heal.  Then I will begin to lay the groundwork to find a woman who has a heart, is kind, grateful, patient and compassionate.   

I will stay close to this site.  Thanks again!

Excellent.  If you decide to pursue FSUW again, a couple words of advice that seem appropriate for you based on what we know/assume.

DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR A FSUW.  If you do, she is either desperate or playing you.  Both are reasons to walk away IMO.

DO NOT INTRODUCE FINANCIAL MATTERS EARLY IN THE RELATIONSHIP.   First win her heart and earn her trust and confidence (confident that you are the type of man who takes care of his woman, something done with actions, not words).

DELETE "GRATEFUL" from your list above and REPLACE IT WITH "DOES NOT FEEL ENTITLED."  Maybe I am just misinterpreting your words, or thinking you may overreact to the bad experience.   The FSUW I liked had a strong personality and much pride.  They certainly appreciated when I did something for them but never felt indebted. 

ADD "LOVES ME" to your above list.  As we always say, you will know it.    This is far more than being committed to the relationship and entering marriage in good faith.

[Faux Pas]

Time for a break at this point.  I will now move forward and seek time to heal.  Then I will begin to lay the groundwork to find a woman who has a heart, is kind, grateful, patient and compassionate.   

I will stay close to this site.  Thanks again!

Congrats for the moment of clarity that help you to reach that decision Paulie. The woman is a Succubus. She could have been from any country. Hopefully, the lesson you've learned you'll take to heart as well as Gator's advice above. There is no excuse for bad behavior. No matter how beautiful, hot or seemingly right intentions.

Take all the time you need. I suspect it's a lot but remember. The surest way to get over a heartbreak is to put yourself back in the game.

Good luck

[BillyB]

  I finally had enough.  I always knew on an intellectual level this was not going to work.  It was the emotional level in which I was not 'sober' enough to get past the alluring nature of this grifter, this gold-digger. 

To make sure you don't get in the same situation again, re-read this thread again and pick up on some of the good advice. Also you must identify the problems that got you trouble. I don't believe emotions were all of your problems. I think your little head got involved and made some of the decisions. If the woman were ugly, you probably wouldn't have tolerated her behavior as much as you did with this one. Next time a woman shows you bad behavior, no matter how beautiful she is, do not tolerate it, walk away. She'll respect you for it.

I really had a hard and expensive lesson - emotionally, spiritually, psychologically and financially.  Thankfully I came to my senses.  Otherwise I would have been broke - not financially but physically.  This definitively has affected my health. 

Before making a major decision, always remember what John Wayne said, "Life is tough, it's tougher when you're stupid."

I want to thank each and everyone of you for your kindness, thoughtful comments and your continual support and not booting me off of here because I was being so intransigent for not taking everyone's advice. 

No need to thank us but we do accept all major credit cards and Western Union!

[CanadaMan]

Hello Everyone,

Well it is DONE, OVER, FINISHED.   I literally kicked her to the curb. 

Congratulations! I wish you a speedy recovery.

Just one thing though.
We can't let you get away with the above teaser and nothing more.
Please tell us the story of when, where and how you kicked her to the curb.

[Paulie]

Congratulations! I wish you a speedy recovery.

Just one thing though.
We can't let you get away with the above teaser and nothing more.
Please tell us the story of when, where and how you kicked her to the curb.

I will be happy to tell the story, especially since I've told it all along.  I will do that over the end of the weekend.

[Patagonie]

I think that now you are recovering.
Some good posts here, like always. And when you will be really ok, come here again to read all posts. I am sure that all had been written but you missed some importants points.
Please tell us the details of the end and all you kept in your mind, it will be useful for newbies. And it isn't only a story about a meeting between an american an a FSU lady, it all also about blindness and it involvies a LOT of guys. I personnaly see (and i had been so stupid myself so many time) and saw a LOT, a LOT of men of all ages (and some successful, smart) trapped in damaging relationships. Incredible.

Pat

[ML]

Best to you Paulie.

[Jumper]

Paulie,
It may sting now , but its good to hear you moved on from what appeared an unhealthy non compatible  relationship.


Good luck in the future.

[calmissile]

Paulie,

Glad you finally made the only logical decision.  It only hurts for a while.  You'll get over it sooner than you think.   Best of luck to you.

[JohnDearGreen]

I will be happy to tell the story, especially since I've told it all along.  I will do that over the end of the weekend.

I would ask for a pic of her, but we might have a couple dozen guys making her a new guarantee.

[Daveman]

...  He'll cave and give her exactly what she wants...

Well, I have to admit I am a little surprised. Good for you Paul. It won't be long before you really wonder what the hell you were thinking all along.  Becoming entangled with one who isn't, er, the best match happens to most everyone at least once. 

[Slumba]

I would ask for a pic of her, but we might have a couple dozen guys making her a new guarantee.

Yes, because everyone on the site is a moron 

[Lily]

I would ask for a pic of her, but we might have a couple dozen guys making her a new guarantee.

I'd love to see her pic, too! Just curious about how beautiful a woman could be in order to make an American man fall for her that badly.

[SilverSong]

I can understand the troubles and frustration of topic starter, he had lots of pain and been hurt a lot. I read all topic and was sad about all unpleasant moments.
But to ask him to post a photo of someone without her consent is legally inappropriate. This is an invasion of privaе life, no matter how much that woman was not nice with Paul.

[Shadow]

It is not really appropriate to congratulate anyone with breaking off a relationship, but I am happy you managed to get yourself out.
As for the future, I hope that you will join those who will tell that a true relationship with FSUW does not take anything, but only gives rewards for whatever you will put in to it.

[jone]

I can understand the troubles and frustration of topic starter, he had lots of pain and been hurt a lot. I read all topic and was sad about all unpleasant moments.
But to ask him to post a photo of someone without her consent is legally inappropriate. This is an invasion of privaе life, no matter how much that woman was not nice with Paul.

It may be inappropriate, but you can find pictures in the public domain of just about anyone.  Sharing such a picture on here is not illegal, just possibly in poor taste.  I agree with your sentiments, just not the jurisprudence.  Welcome aboard.  Introduce yourself.

[SilverSong]

It may be inappropriate, but you can find pictures in the public domain of just about anyone.  Sharing such a picture on here is not illegal, just possibly in poor taste.  I agree with your sentiments, just not the jurisprudence.  Welcome aboard.  Introduce yourself.

Pictures in public domain were put there when their owners were willing to do this.
I am not that woman,  , I bet, if I would her, my posts would sound different. 
And yes, this would be in poor taste.
In my country to put photos of someone without consent is illegal. I don't like to offtop the main discussion further though.
But there is a solution - everyone can ask the photos in private correspondence. Personally me - I would not ask any of his nor her photos.