Thoughts on returning to Russia...what women are looking for.

[Danchik]

Please, don't turn it into the discussion Russia vs USA, at the end of my post I mentioned that this is not ABSOLUTE TRUTH, but personal observations which are based in MY PERSONAL experience. Any person has his or her own experience. Danchik, Shadow, Gator, Muzh, etc. So that was MY experience.

It doesn't mean this is the way it really is in Russia and the US!!!

I can only speak for myself when I say that I never look at things as good or bad, black or white, or better or worse. I see things as different, that's all.

Having been in Russia as long as I have, I consider myself Russian, or at least 50% Russian. And like most Russians, I feel I can make a little fun of it from time to time. If any foreigner comes on this or any forum I'm a part of and criticises Russia, you will see me defend it with the passion of a Russian as I have in the past.

I love this country almost as much as a Russian and owe so much to Russia for what it has afforded me over the years that my words would not, could not do it justice. I certainly love it more than any other foreigner.

Some things you can't deny, what is real is real.

Vasalia, I hope you continue with YOUR thoughts about YOUR observations, but also leave room for others to share their thoughts about it if they choose to do so as well without reading to much into it, especially if they have as much experience in both countries as you.

Hopefully you can see the value in that.

[Danchik]

Danchik, I've got impression Vasilisa confused one guy of Mexican descent from LA with that aggressive Russian. 
But your style of conversation could be taken as coming from a Russian, indeed 

I'm sure you're right. I can always count on you to have my back. Really, no joking.

Maybe she just needs more time to acclimate back to Russia.

[Shadow]

I can only speak for myself when I say that I never look at things as good or bad, black or white, or better or worse. I see things as different, that's all.

That is certainly something you have picked up in Russia.

[Danchik]

That is certainly something you have picked up in Russia.

Not at all. I learned that many years ago.

But your style of conversation could be taken as coming from a Russian, indeed 

Now this maybe.

[GQBlues]

I know the opinion expressed is but from one individual. My hope however is that this opinion can held by the millions of illegal immigrants living within the US, a minority of which are actually Russians. Especially those on every  immigration offices with their placards to speedy up citizenship entitlements.

I wish Vasilia well actually. Especially when she decides to go back to the homeland so she can find herself and her happiness. The way I look at these things, the quicker she leaves, the quicker someone will happily take her vacated spot from somewhere else.

[pitbull]

I described not the model of a perfect relationship. I described the model of a MOB business relationship.

Then it's inevitably a very temporary arrangement since life circimstances change.
Also, do you really believe that all the women on MOB sites are looking for this type of a relationship? I found my husband on elenasmodels, so I do fit your description of a "MOB"-generated marriage. The "MOB business relationship" type of marriage as you describe it is a recipe for disaster and waste of time, and this is by far not what I was looking for. I personally know marriages that are nothing like you describe, and they are happy.

[pitbull]

So even from this thread you can clearly seen what kind of women feel well in the US. 

Please elaborate? Personally, I don't see anything like that from this thread, let alone clearly 

[Misha]

1 month.

Just as I thought, still the euphoria of leaving old stress behind and the excitement of a "clean slate" and being back home with family and friends. It will be interesting to see what you would say one year from now, once the excitement of being back is gone and you are left with the routine of daily life. My comment is not to say anything negative about you, but merely to point out that your comments are being coloured in part by the euphoria you are likely feeling at the moment.

[Aloe]

Last time i was in Russia (a couple months ago), i had a culture shock! People were so rude, i was shocked    Even seemingly intelligent/well-dressed young women were incredibly rude! How horrible 

[Muzh]

I know the opinion expressed is but from one individual. My hope however is that this opinion can held by the millions of illegal immigrants living within the US, a minority of which are actually Russians. Especially those on every  immigration offices with their placards to speedy up citizenship entitlements.

I wish Vasilia well actually. Especially when she decides to go back to the homeland so she can find herself and her happiness. The way I look at these things, the quicker she leaves, the quicker someone will happily take her vacated spot from somewhere else.

Maybe you missed it. She's there already.

[Vasilisa]

Just as I thought, still the euphoria of leaving old stress behind and the excitement of a "clean slate" and being back home with family and friends. It will be interesting to see what you would say one year from now, once the excitement of being back is gone and you are left with the routine of daily life. My comment is not to say anything negative about you, but merely to point out that your comments are being coloured in part by the euphoria you are likely feeling at the moment.

I don't think so. After I got divorced I went back home and stayed in Russia for several months't time , that impression "how terrible and people are rude" was for the first 2-3 weeks, after that I felt fine. This time it was for the first 2-3 days, then I felt much better about Russia. As i said, I don't judge the book by its cover and not looking for money.

[Vasilisa]

The way I look at these things, the quicker she leaves, the quicker someone will happily take her vacated spot from somewhere else.

huh? Which vacated spot?!

[Vasilisa]

Last time i was in Russia (a couple months ago), i had a culture shock! People were so rude, i was shocked    Even seemingly intelligent/well-dressed young women were incredibly rude! How horrible 

I have been here for a month so far, visited several cities, visited several offices as I have to get some documents and beleive it or not  I haven't been treated in a rude way by anyone except for RW living in the US. Honestly.  Actually people were pretty friendly and helpful.  Yes, some cashiers are not smiling and  look tired but as soon as you treat them well and thank and wish a good day they smile back.  Maybe the secret is to smile and treat people with respect.

[Misha]

The "MOB business relationship" type of marriage as you describe it is a recipe for disaster and waste of time, and this is by far not what I was looking for.

Yes, and invariably people's lives will live up to their expectations. If they expect to find a "MOB business relationship" that is what they will find, likewise if men expect that all women are "materialistic" they will flash the cash and invariably find the type of woman they thus expect to find....

[Misha]

This time it was for the first 2-3 days, then I felt much better about Russia. As i said, I don't judge the book by its cover and not looking for money.

The point I was making was that people's impressions and thoughts and locations are shaped by their moods and where they are in their lives. If somebody is in "vacation" mode then they will see all the beauty that any location invariably offers, but the real test comes when the excitement fades and you have to deal with the day-to-day problems of life. Much like marriage once the honeymoon phase has passed

[Vasilisa]

Please elaborate? Personally, I don't see anything like that from this thread, let alone clearly 

pitbull, that was my personal observation and I have met a lot of RW and UW in the US, read a lot of stories on forums, moreover, I actually met some married members of this forum and their wives. (I am not telling the names)Yes, they write how great their relationships , how great their wives are, are but at the same time they don't mention how much money they put into their relationships and their young wives don't work.

"Spiritual" and "romantic" women, so-called "Тургеневские барышни" looking for love and soulmates are not doing very well there, women looking for improvement of their living conditions, career, success, money, better life for their kids are doing way better, another observation is that people that complain a lot about how bad it was in Russia actually were the people that were acting in a rude way, threw garbage around, smoke, drank beer in parks, had rude drunk Russian husbands and didn't follow the rules in Russia.

So, this explains my post about Danchik. She complained how terrible it was in Russia but she is the one who is acting like a bad Russian from her stories even being in the US.

[Vasilisa]

Anyway, my post wasn't for RWor RM, so I don't see the point in discussing it with other Russians here, everyone will have his or her own opinion,  it was for AM(especially older AM) looking for young beautiful RW hoping to find the woman that will love them, not their money and their country. Hopefully they will understand what I mean and make conclusions.

[Misha]

people that complain a lot about how bad it was in Russia actually were the people that were acting in a rude way, threw garbage around, smoke, drank beer in parks, had rude drunk Russian husbands and didn't follow the rules in Russia.

That is quite the generalization 

[Vasilisa]

The point I was making was that people's impressions and thoughts and locations are shaped by their moods and where they are in their lives. If somebody is in "vacation" mode then they will see all the beauty that any location invariably offers, but the real test comes when the excitement fades and you have to deal with the day-to-day problems of life. Much like marriage once the honeymoon phase has passed

Well, maybe my vacation mode will change, we will see. 

[Boethius]

Anyway, my post wasn't for RWor RM, so I don't see the point in discussing it with other Russians here, everyone will have his or her own opinion,  it was for AM(especially older AM) looking for young beautiful RW hoping to find the woman that will love them, not their money and their country. Hopefully they will understand what I mean and make conclusions.

I think they do understand it innately.  However, it is easier to lie, especially to yourself.

[Misha]

Well, maybe my vacation mode will change, we will see. 

As I said, let me know in a year what your impressions are

[Vasilisa]

That is quite the generalization 

Not all of them, there are always exceptions. But this is a personal observation.
It works the same way with the Russians who are  in Russia, too. Some Russians I meet here complain that everything in Russia is bad:the laws are bad, it's dirty, etc, at the same time they smoke in elevators and throw cigarette boxes out of the window when they are driving.
If you want to live the way they live in the West how about you start with yourself?! That's simple. But no, they don't want that, they keep on smoking and littering and say:we pay taxes, so the President must solve this problem.

[Muzh]

Well, maybe my vacation mode will change, we will see. 

Well it better change or Uncle Misha will be very disappointed, understand little lady?

He's just looking for your best interest because you don't know any better. 

[Misha]

Well it better change or Uncle Misha will be very disappointed, understand little lady?

He's just looking for your best interest because you don't know any better. 

Not a question of knowing better, simply a matter of understanding that a person's emotions influence their subjectivity. The best time to ask a person for an opinion that will be more balanced is once they have settled in to their new lives, once the euphoria has passed, once the culture shock negativity has passed, etc...

[Vasilisa]

Well it better change or Uncle Misha will be very disappointed, understand little lady?

He's just looking for your best interest because you don't know any better. 

Well, I learnt myself quite well, I am a very adventurous person, that was the reason why I was so excited about something foreign and unusual, so I don't think I am going to stay in Russia all the time, I will get bored, my current work includes a lot of traveling. But I am curious myself what I am going to feel like later, so I promise to be honest, that is something like an "online diary".