Elenas models and Skype...one month in

[santo]

So I have been doing this for about a month now and it has been an interesting experience.  I have learned a lot.  Some from you guys, some from the FSU girls, and a lot from trial and error.  Besides these girls being more attractive than the girls I usually date in the us, they are more interesting, feminine and mature.  I started dating a local girl since I have been doing this and I have completely lost interest because she is so boring compared to these girls.  My Russian friend says it is because these girls will tell me whatever I want to hear so they can get their passport.

I am skyping  with two girls regularly now, and chatting (no video) with a couple more.   I have weeded out girls that only wanted to email after they ran out of excuses why they couldn't Skype or even talk on the phone.  It's pretty hard to write someone an email nowadays and claim you don't have access to a computer. There is another that voice chats on Skype and sends pics but makes excuses why she doesn't video chat. 

In any case, although this is a lot of fun, it is not real until I actually meet the girls in person.  I am serious about marrying one eventually, so I have decided the only way to further this is to take a trip over there ASAP and get my boots on the ground and arms around these ladies.

In fact, I think the best way to go about this thing is to start chatting with girls on elenas about a month prior to departure, then schedule the trip and start meeting them.  What do you guys think?

[I/O]

What do you guys think?

I think most of what you've mentioned is treatable relatively economically - curiosity is not, that requires a trip.

[Hammer2722]

Santo, its great that you are getting on the plane but I would verify the ladies you want to go meet are either real or are the people who they say they are. Have you seen any on these ladies on webcam via Skype at all? Audio is great but if they continue to give you reasons why they can't video chat then drop that lady and move on. She probably looks nothing like the photos she has sent you.
 
I have met plenty on ladies like this. Constantly giving lame excuses why they could not turn their webcam on.Good luck!

[mendeleyev]

Were you my son or brother, I'd advise traveling primarily to learn something of the lay of the land, meet a few ladies while there, and while that is an expensive option, it is cheaper than a divorce down the road.

As to your Russian friend, there are those types of ladies but these days the dream of obtaining a US passport is not as magical as it used to be. You can meet a girl who just wants your money and status across town just as easily. He does however understand what you don't understand and knows that the learning curve can be steep so he is trying to save you some heartache.

As to more feminine, it depends on what you mean. Don't be sucked into the agency falsehoods about these gals living in the 1950s. That is hype to gain agency access to your wallet. Russian women can be business owners, corporate executives, and everything else that the agencies claim they're not.

I met earlier today with a Russian woman who is a television anchor on a business channel. She is hot, a 10,000 on a scale of 1 to 10, and I say that respectfully because she is married. She is everything that even some Russians find unusual, starting with 3 young children in a land where the normal is one child or two at the most. She and her husband defy every agency description of these women, including the fact that her husband is a normal guy who is very active with their children. In fact the last time I was at their home I found him bouncing with the kids outside on a trampoline -- far from the false agency claim that most Russian men are absent at home only to stumble in late at night from an evening at the bar. He is actually the norm, not the exception.

You mentioned that they're far more attractive than girls you normally date at home. Yes, you can generally "trade up" so to speak but be careful. Once you've gone to all the time, effort and expense of courting, building a relationship, and bringing a lady to your country, you will find that in your home town there will be plenty of guys with better looks and more money who find her appealing too and they could care less about who took the time, effort and expense to bring her over. Don't allow looks to be the only consideration as the key is to work on building a genuine relationship first, her looks second.

[ML]

Once you've gone to all the time, effort and expense of courting, building a relationship, and bringing a lady to your country, you will find that in your home town there will be plenty of guys with better looks and more money who find her appealing too and they could care less about who took the time, effort and expense to bring her over.

But, because of honor among men, they will not take a run at her for 3 to 4 years.

I heard that rule somewhere.

[LAman]

But, because of honor among men, they will not take a run at her for 3 to 4 years.

I heard that rule somewhere.

You mean the honor code called, " All's fair in love and war????

[mendeleyev]

because of honor among men, they will not take a run at her for 3 to 4 years.

New honour code regulations have shortened that time to 6 months. Then in month seven, watch to see what happens:

[santo]

Great advice thanks. 

It does seem like the only way to make any of this work is to go to the country and meet them, chatting months in advance is almost pointless.

I have Skyped with a few of them on video chat and they look exactly like the pics if not better.  The others have been filtered out.  It's easy to tell now because like you say they just use excuses to not video chat. I had a couple emailer ladies too, who made excuses why they could not Skype.  They have been dumped too.  It's been about 90% garbage but I have met a few nice girls out of it.  I think I contacted a total of about 26 so far, and am talking to 3-5 of them.  The others filtered out as scammers, and one extremely hot one filtered me out after one Skype date. Lol

When I compare these women to American girls I was referring to foreign girls in general.  It seems we have lost something here in the states when it comes to relationships between men and women.  I travelled to Spain when I was 18 and later travelled and lived extensively in Europe.  The first time I met a Spanish girl I felt like a goofy idiot.  They were so mature and understood things about male female relationships that I didn't.  The more I travelled, the harder it was to tolerate American women.  I am 39 now, and can't really date them.  It's hard to explain but I'm sure you guys who have fsu wives can understand.  What I've seen so far via Skype is even better than the girls I have met in Spain or France, like a version 3.0 of that.

So here I am, pretty much decided I'm going to look for my wife over there.  I have seen posts mentioning that all girls are the same, just different language, but I beg to differ.

I was at dinner again with my Russian friend.  I brought up to him the above point, and also reminded him that he himself has a Russian wife much younger than him.  He said, ya you're right, just be careful.

[ML]

I have seen posts mentioning that all girls are the same, just different language, but I beg to differ.

I have spent time with over a hundred FSUW.

I beg to differ with your beg to differ.

Yes, you can trade up in FSU compared to what you can attain in USA.

But the very same women that you trade up to in FSU are available right here in USA . . . just not available to you.

In general, there is nothing at all 'better' about the average woman in FSU.

And, in exchange for your ability to 'trade up' in FSU in some characteristic that you desire, you will be taking on a ton of problems and costs.

Only X years down the road will you be able to assess which  outweighs the other.

Yes, some are lucky . . . but some (many, most?) are not.

[Slumba]

I have spent time with over a hundred FSUW.

I beg to differ with your beg to differ.

Yes, you can trade up in FSU compared to what you can attain in USA.

But the very same women that you trade up to in FSU are available right here in USA . . . just not available to you.

In general, there is nothing at all 'better' about the average woman in FSU.

And, in exchange for your ability to 'trade up' in FSU in some characteristic that you desire, you will be taking on a ton of problems and costs.

Only X years down the road will you be able to assess which  outweighs the other.

Yes, some are lucky . . . but some (many, most?) are not.

FSUW aren't special snowflakes, shouldn't be placed on pedestals, but in terms of the "total package" there is a substantial difference.

Who did you end up with, again? 

[santo]

ML your are 100% right.  High quality women do exist here, but they are in short supply and have extremely high standards.  I paid a lot of money and went through an executive matchmaking agency. The agency recruited  career oriented executive type ladies that were beautiful and well put together.  I met some high quality girls I would have never met online or at the bars.  But they had such high standards ( probably unrealistic) most of them filtered me out.  Additionally, a lot of these women were overly liberal, and I clashed with some of them over traditional gender role issues.  They were used to steamrolling their men and putting his balls in a jar somewhere.  I think that's more of an American thing, although it exists everywhere.

higher quality women are accessible to us in FSU because we get a couple extra points for being American and having the passport.  And that's okay, as long as one of their reasons for being with us is also love.

[Faux Pas]

There is likely going to be a virus in your 3.0 if you start "wife hunting". Get wife hunting out of your mind. To use a football analogy, you are a long way from the goal line. You are in the stadium but you are not in the game quite yet.

Look for interesting women you just generally "like", open the dialogue and communication and see how many crop up to be someone you really want to meet. Go meet them and see which lady rises to the top of someone you'd like to formulate a relationship with. Let nature take it's course. If marriage is to be, it will happen without you making it the end goal.

Too many guys enter this adventure with the idea that they are picking out a wife and some of them do. Only to be on the list of "crash and burn" sometime later. With that mind set they are attempting to start with the conclusion and then fill in the blanks as they go. A big mistake IMHO. Relationships are fluid and must be permitted to grow and flourish or, die on their own merit. Allow them to be and do, what they are. As much as possible think with the big head.

[Jumper]

There is likely going to be a virus in your 3.0 if you start "wife hunting". Get wife hunting out of your mind. To use a football analogy, you are a long way from the goal line. You are in the stadium but you are not in the game quite yet.

Look for interesting women you just generally "like", open the dialogue and communication and see how many crop up to be someone you really want to meet. Go meet them and see which lady rises to the top of someone you'd like to formulate a relationship with. Let nature take it's course. If marriage is to be, it will happen without you making it the end goal.

Too many guys enter this adventure with the idea that they are picking out a wife and some of them do. Only to be on the list of "crash and burn" sometime later. With that mind set they are attempting to start with the conclusion and then fill in the blanks as they go. A big mistake IMHO. Relationships are fluid and must be permitted to grow and flourish or, die on their own merit. Allow them to be and do, what they are. As much as possible think with the big head.

I agree, and advise folks to enjoy the time spent building a relationship.
It may move forward,it may not. That's what relationships do.
I do  see many concentrate on some end goal of matrimony.
 (which really is just the beginning)

[Daveman]

EM general discussion was split off to here:


http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=16530.0

[steveboy]

ML your are 100% right.  High quality women do exist here, but they are in short supply and have extremely high standards.  I paid a lot of money and went through an executive matchmaking agency. The agency recruited  career oriented executive type ladies that were beautiful and well put together.  I met some high quality girls I would have never met online or at the bars.  But they had such high standards ( probably unrealistic) most of them filtered me out.  Additionally, a lot of these women were overly liberal, and I clashed with some of them over traditional gender role issues.  They were used to steamrolling their men and putting his balls in a jar somewhere.  I think that's more of an American thing, although it exists everywhere.

higher quality women are accessible to us in FSU because we get a couple extra points for being American and having the passport.  And that's okay, as long as one of their reasons for being with us is also love.

You get a couple of extra points for being American??? What the heck is that all about??? I think you are slightly deluded! Those days went many years ago