Calling All Old Posters-- ie Those missing on Forum for some time

[Gator]

Not sure old bat is acceptable. 

Old fart has a sense of endearment.  I do not find the term too hostile, and men being more at ease with themselves frequently use the term in talking with each other.  It is done in sarcasm to express affection because men tend to be emotionally stunted and have trouble expressing fond feelings towards each other. 

But women would not call each other an old bat.   In fact, women have the opposite problem that men do.  [I will stop here out of ......fear/respect/_____....]

[pitbull]

You know damn well that you are not respecting Ken.  Your use of the derogatory term MOB establishes that.

I admire his ability to get a great deal, which is essential in this whole MOB business!!  [size=78%]! As to MOB, there might be a whole thread as to whether this is derogatory.[/size]


If you wish, I am a part of MOB as well since I met my husband on Elena's models.

[TheTraveler]

Neither of them are acceptable descriptors.

99% of the posters on here would agree that 'old fart' has become the rwd equivalent of an nba hand-check.

but i'm a creative guy.  i'm sure i'll come up with something equivalent!

[Ranetka]

Is this Ken's fault?  If yes, why?  If not, why deprecate Ken?

I  feel and always have said so in a marriage of a successful middle age man with a teenager away from her family a man has more responsibility including for their futures.

[pitbull]

What's very interesting about this is that there were four, or was it five members who were moderated in this thread for various reasons.  Not one of them complained about that.  And yet, it seems there are some who have complaints about the mere thought of having to abide by forum rules which are precisely the ones to which every member agreed to follow as a condition of membership.

That truly is hilarious. 

Me? Complaining? Nope, just stating the fact. I don't care much, your board-your rules, honey.


In fact, you are completely free to ban me if I offended too many of them rules 

[pitbull]

I  feel and always have said so in a marriage of a successful middle age man with a teenager away from her family a man has more responsibility including for their futures.

Hey, don't forget - nobody forced her into marriage, who cares about her future once the marriage is over - free will, free choice, baby! 

[Daveman]

Who is deprecating Ken! On the contrary we agree he did very well and got an amazing deal. Good on him, again!


Of course he should be in the MOB-ers' Hall of Fame and maybe even write a book. 

The problem is that the only one qualified to go into the specifics of this debate is Lena herself.  She's not here.  So, the only way to debate the issue is by using:

1) She wasted her youth and got nothing in return - the former being speculative, the latter being false.

2) She did not take full advantage of her opportunities - we do not know her level of drive, ambition, her goals, her talents, etc. 

bottom line: discussing Lena specifically has little value.

I  feel and always have said so in a marriage of a successful middle age man with a teenager away from her family a man has more responsibility including for their futures.

I don't disagree with this, but be a little more specific, what do you think he should do for their futures?

[Daveman]

Hey, don't forget - nobody forced her into marriage, who cares about her future once the marriage is over - free will, free choice, baby! 

And let's not forget my personal favorite -> individual responsibility for one's own decisions.   

[pitbull]

The problem is that the only one qualified to go into the specifics of this debate is Lena herself.  She's not here.  So, the only way to debate the issue is by using:

1) She wasted her youth and got nothing in return - the former being speculative, the latter being false.

2) She did not take full advantage of her opportunities - we do not know her level of drive, ambition, her goals, her talents, etc. 

I happen to strongly support assertion #1, and believe it is evident to anyone with a modicum of logic and honesty. Now what?

[Ranetka]

Hey, don't forget - nobody forced her into marriage, who cares about her future once the marriage is over - free will, free choice, baby! 

I am struggling to understand how people can equalise a 45 years old American business owner with a 19 years old girl in a destroyed country (1998?) where not many can see future and where her parents are advising 'go for it, do not loose this man'  (still remember reading this feeling uneasy) .

[Daveman]

I happen to strongly support assertion #1, and believe it is evident to anyone with a modicum of logic and honesty. Now what?

The modicum of logic and honesty would dictate that only the individual may determine what is or isn't true in that individual's situation.   It would be a gem to read her own perspective, however, she's not here.  So we're back to - now what? or where do we take the discussion from here?

Why not get into some specifics of what you think a woman should do to provide for her future?

[Ranetka]

I don't disagree with this, but be a little more specific, what do you think he should do for their futures?

Not load her with guilt so she wouldn't destroyed alimony agreement , or whatever it was she tore apart. This is of course a speculation since you asked for it.
Help her with a career like GQ did. Set money aside for her while he can. Get this adopted child. Ask himself why a young wife of his is so depressed she does not clean the dog mess and deal with the answer. How the heck am i to know? I see the outcome and express opinion, you are asking me to speculate? (All from Ken's past posts, btw)

[Misha]

And let's not forget my personal favorite -> individual responsibility for one's own decisions.   

Yes, and most people do the best they can with the information at hand and based on their priorities at any given moment.

[vwrw]

You see an example on this very board where Greg wants too see what pitbull's ass looks like in order to listen to her arguments.
As an student antropologist you should be aware there are plenty of studies showing attractive people are treated better and are more successful in things like getting jobs, etc. You can google it up, surely.

Ranetka, I understand how you might come to conclusion that I study anthropology. There was time when I was fascinated by this subject matter and were discussing here info I learned during the class.
I major in accounting.

Yes, I agree with you that attractive people are treated better, and an attractive person is more likely to get a job when it comes to a middle level or low level position. However, when it comes to high level positions, physical beauty becomes a burden for women. Beautiful women are not taken seriously. People are more willing to assume that beautiful women  shagged their way to success rather than admit that they got there because of their intelligence and productivity. 




 

[pitbull]

Why not get into some specifics of what you think a woman should do to provide for her future?

I already expressed my advice to a teenager marrying grandpa, clearly and concisely in this very thread:


1.  It's a temporary arrangement
2. Read what Northkape's Lena did. Do that.
3. Read what KenC's Lena did. DO NOT do that.

[pitbull]

Ranetka, I understand how you might come to conclusion that I study anthropology. There was time when I was fascinated by this subject matter and were discussing here info I learned during the class.
I major in accounting.

Yes, I agree with you that attractive people are treated better, and an attractive person is more likely to get a job when it comes to a middle level or low level position. However, when it comes to high level positions, physical beauty becomes a burden for women. Beautiful women are not taken seriously. People more willing to assume that beautiful women  shagged their way to success rather than admit that they got there because of their intelligence and productivity. 

 

In Russia maybe. NOT in the US.

[Gylden]

As long as everyone is in a speculative mood, here is my take.

Older guy gets a little deluded/confused/convinced that there is a good chance of having a long term relation with a much younger woman. He is sincere and is convinced of his love and has all intentions of treating her as best he can.
Young woman is depressed/unsure of what the future may hold and is deluded/confused/convinced that marriage/long term relationship/family to a foreigner is a good prospect. Meets and older charming/secure foreign man, whom she finds attractive. Her intentions are sincere and she is convinced with such a man it is possible to build a lasting relationship.

Both have moments of doubt, but these are relieved by their desire and the support of people around them.

As a result of their commitment to each other and the will to make it work, the relationship hits the ten year mark before they are both burnt out.

Exit stage left.........no villain
 

[Daveman]

Not load her with guilt so she wouldn't destroyed alimony agreement , or whatever it was she tore apart. This is of course a speculation since you asked for it.
Help her with a career like GQ did. Set money aside for her while he can. Get this adopted child. Ask himself why a young wife of his is so depressed she does not clean the dog mess and deal with the answer. How the heck am i to know? I see the outcome and express opinion, you are asking me to speculate? (All from Ken's past posts, btw)

Not speculate about that specific situation - that one is six years done and gone - but rather your input for men and women currently involved such a situation.  You provided some examples there.  Anything else you can think of?

[vwrw]

In fact, you are completely free to ban me.

No, we are not free to ban you, our liking you prevents that from happening. 

[Turboguy]

1.  It's a temporary arrangement

Life is a temporary arrangement.   Marriage is too just the length and ending may be different but all marriages are temporary.[/quote]

[vwrw]

In Russia maybe. NOT in the US.

All the studies were made in the US.

[Ranetka]

Not speculate about that specific situation - that one is six years done and gone - but rather your input for men and women currently involved such a situation.  You provided some examples there.  Anything else you can think of?

Not marry her in the first place lol.


is it not enough examples? 

Re shelf life. I think people should try and marry for life. If you don't see yourself growing old with this person then don't  marry. Simples.

[pitbull]

No, we are not free to ban you, our liking you prevents that from happening. 

Do you have a say in this? 

[pitbull]

All the studies were made in the US.

I've only seen studies to the contrary. The hot Yahoo CEO would disagree anyway 

[Turboguy]

Do you have a say in this? 

She has a say in saying we like you.  Isn't that enough