Scandinavian newbie and a question

[adventureh]

Hi,

I am new in this forum and find it all quite interesting. I have a major question though:

I have been doing some online dating on a local Danish site and have also met 6 of those girls all from Denmark and not FSU. You could probably compare it to match.com or similar.

We all had great ONLINE chemistry - you probably all know that. Then after a few weeks we meet and realize that there is no chemistry, no spark whatsoever. I have met 6 girls like that now: Great online chemistry, perfect compatibility but no real world chemistry and everything falls apart after 1-2 hours....well to be honest I know within a few seconds of meeting if our energies/karma whatever will match :-). Typically we meet after some online chatting after 2 weeks.

It really puzzles me how men travel all the to the FSU and it looks like instant perfect chemistry. Is it because they chatted and spoke on the phone constantly for 2 months - or what is going on?

Maybe somebody could elaborate a bit om chemistry - because it is really tricky. Sometimes I think, due to all the sucess stories, that EW just have plain more chemistry with most and Western Women are just complicated in that matter.

Adventureman

[RoboCop]

Hi,

I am new in this forum and find it all quite interesting. I have a major question though:

I have been doing some online dating on a local Danish site and have also met 6 of those girls all from Denmark and not FSU. You could probably compare it to match.com or similar.

We all had great ONLINE chemistry - you probably all know that. Then after a few weeks we meet and realize that there is no chemistry, no spark whatsoever. I have met 6 girls like that now: Great online chemistry, perfect compatibility but no real world chemistry and everything falls apart after 1-2 hours....well to be honest I know within a few seconds of meeting if our energies/karma whatever will match :-). Typically we meet after some online chatting after 2 weeks.

It really puzzles me how men travel all the to the FSU and it looks like instant perfect chemistry. Is it because they chatted and spoke on the phone constantly for 2 months - or what is going on?

Maybe somebody could elaborate a bit om chemistry - because it is really tricky. Sometimes I think, due to all the sucess stories, that EW just have plain more chemistry with most and Western Women are just complicated in that matter.

Adventureman

I know what you mean with regards to chemistry. You usually know for sure after the first couple of hours.

Western women are a bit more "non-traditional" and dare I say, "entitled" in my opinion, that would no doubt complicate things. (AC would be able to give a more definitive answer to this.)

Hard to answer your question.  Most guys here have made multiple trips to the FSU before meeting their spouse. I guess they just played the numbers game.

[Patagonie]

Hi,

I am new in this forum and find it all quite interesting. I have a major question though:

I have been doing some online dating on a local Danish site and have also met 6 of those girls all from Denmark and not FSU. You could probably compare it to match.com or similar.

We all had great ONLINE chemistry - you probably all know that. Then after a few weeks we meet and realize that there is no chemistry, no spark whatsoever. I have met 6 girls like that now: Great online chemistry, perfect compatibility but no real world chemistry and everything falls apart after 1-2 hours....well to be honest I know within a few seconds of meeting if our energies/karma whatever will match :-). Typically we meet after some online chatting after 2 weeks.

It really puzzles me how men travel all the to the FSU and it looks like instant perfect chemistry. Is it because they chatted and spoke on the phone constantly for 2 months - or what is going on?

Maybe somebody could elaborate a bit om chemistry - because it is really tricky. Sometimes I think, due to all the sucess stories, that EW just have plain more chemistry with most and Western Women are just complicated in that matter.

Adventureman

What you are explaining is the real world, i mean the ordinary world of dating.
It happens many time, if you really think about how many women you met in one year, that finally nothing special happens. (no chemistry).
Don't imagine that dating in FSU is totally different.
The truth is that the guys who have finally found some reciprocated sparks wrote it here for hours, but the majority, who haven't, they never come here or are just  lurkers.
The difference is however about the men in FSU, how they feel the chemistry (the men, only the men because it is quite different for women), they very quickly fall in love, that is it. Men are microwaves, they warn very quickly, flat dick no, hard dick yes, that is quite simple.

To elaborate a little more, don't mix up comfort, which is helped by an extensive writing, with attraction test + seduction (large part of the chemistry).

Now just a question, is it you who feel not in chemistry every time ?

[Faux Pas]

adventure
Excellent question and welcome to the forum. I did the online dating for local women for the better part of 3 years and most of the women I met were just as you say. Their profiles were great and some of them even matched what they had in the profile. I even dated several of the women I met online for months but eventually they all met the same end. I could have saved myself a lot of time if I had just planned on all of them being a one date affair.

I had given that whole adventure quite a bit of thought. I concluded once, rightfully or wrongly, that if I were to pick 20 women on the street at random that appealed to me I very likely would have had the same results that I had with local online dating. Isn't it pretty much the same thing? The difference in online dating locally versus the FSU is locally I would be off to meet them after just a couple of phone calls. Not the case with FSUW. If I were to spend 2-3 months of phone calls or emails and skype with local ladies I would have vetted them out and likely never met or dated most of them.

Make no mistake, the no chemistry probably happens more often than not in international dating. I'm pretty sure it does and it is likely more difficult to throw up the surrender flag after having so much invested in an international relationship than a local one. The advice here is, do your due diligence and do not hesitate to move on from a woman internationally anytime before, during or after your trip if you see it likely isn't doable. You have much more time to decide if a woman is worth pursuing internationally than locally. Use it wisely

[BillyB]

Great online chemistry, perfect compatibility but no real world chemistry and everything falls apart after 1-2 hours....well to be honest I know within a few seconds of meeting if our energies/karma whatever will match :-).

Welcome to the forum Adventureman. There are no guarantees when it comes to finding love.

Typically we meet after some online chatting after 2 weeks.

Chatting through a keyboard or through Skype? Make sure you Skype and get on the phone with the ladies often before scheduling a visit. If you can't hold a conversation with the lady over the phone or Skype, chances are you won't have a fruitful conversation with her face to face.

It really puzzles me how men travel all the to the FSU and it looks like instant perfect chemistry. Is it because they chatted and spoke on the phone constantly for 2 months - or what is going on?

Although there are no guarantees, you can reduce your reliance on luck if you put more effort into communicating with the lady before a visit.