Donhollio's FSU Pursuit!

[mendeleyev]

Don, glad you are sharing this with us. 

[Donhollio]

 
  So the ride on the early evening train was like so many others I have taken since. Long, slow, and boring. I don't read much, and looking out the window only is good as long as the sun hasn't set. Once that moment comes it's like sitting in jail waiting for a visitor. (so I have been told)
  The train was to arrive at 4am and Olya will be there to meet me. Only problem was I was in the early stages of a migraine headache. I delayed taking any pills for it, but as the hours passed it was evident that its not going away. So I popped a few pills and tried to sleep it off as most times this will work. I hit the pillow hard and was in deep sleep. I'm not sure what happened next exactly but as the train was about to enter the Zaprozhye train station, the train attendant was shaking me! She had a look of urgency on her face, and I could hear that the train was almost at a stop. I jumped off the top bunk, grabbed my bag and headed to the open door of the now crawling train.
 My first thoughts were, I have to hide from Olya if she's standing there and sees me looking all dichevaled. I had planned on shaving, popping in the contacts, and getting some decent clothes on. But time had run out. I walk off the train and run down into the storage area thinking it was the WC!
 As I was running I noticed what must of been her standing there looking at the train wondering if I was in the car. Lucky for me she was looking the other way slightly, and too far down the line to see me.
 
   Hurrying down a flight of stairs I wound up in the baggage area where, I'm met by a woman and taxi driver. One is trying to offer me his services, and the other is trying to get my money for the locker. I was really confused and somewhat stoned from the pills, but I finally realised there was no WC near me, and when I tried to ask for one, they were confused as to what I was requesting. Finally in exasperation, I look at the woman, then at the man, and gesture I need to take a piss with full sound effects I might add.   They both have a chuckle and he directs me to the WC. Ah yes the WC, not restroom as I was asking for. I really have no idea why I was asking for a restroom, as that term is used only in the United States. In Canada we call it a washroom, in Europe they have signs with WC, yet in Ukraine if you ask for a 'toilet' they will know, as that's what they call the room. If only that Russian language course was still in my head I would of known.
 
  Anyway I get cleaned up and head upstairs to see Olya. By this point the station is empty, and I'm thinking the worst that she has left thinking I didn't get on that train. When I first got off the train I noticed a girl in a skirt, and knew that must of been her, but as I was walking out of the station to find her I was looking for a girl in a red dress??? Too many pills I guess. I made my way to the main doors and we walked right past each other. Her and I locked eyes, and yet it wasn't until we passed each other that we both turned around. I will say it was a brutal first encounter.
 
 Olya informs me she has a taxi waiting to take us to the Azov sea, and asks if its ok. I say sure as there wasn't a bus going there for hours, and I had already taken two days off her holiday. Getting in the taxi she can see how tried I am and wonders why. I try to tell her I can't sleep on trains, planes, automobiles, and I'm sure any other moving thing. I tell her I need cash for the ride $50USD, and we head off to a ATM, known locally as a Bankomat.
 Now things just keep getting better and better... My card is not dispensing the amounts it should be. Fortunately I have another card and it gives me the required sum without hassle. Now I'm worried why this one card wasn't giving me the amount I wanted, all I could get was about $60 every 24 hours. The sunrise drive in the countryside was nice, though it was shocking to see so many dead dogs that were killed during the night by vehicles. Also dotting the roadside were the farmers selling their melons, we made a stop to get some to take to her mother.We drive through Maripol and try the Bankomat again, no luck, and we press on.
Olya tells me to sleep as she can clearly see how exhausted I was, but I told her I had waited since Spring to see her and wasn't going to sleep now!
  The beach area/resort? I dunno what they call it, but it is a beach with bars, restaurants, and some amusement rides all in a strip along the sea coast. I thought it was kind of cool, and took it all in.
 We pull up to the box car that has been converted into two units all for $10 p/n. Her mom was somewhat disappointed and embarrassed in the place as she rented it site unseen from a neighbour. It was good enough for a beach holiday, and I think once Olya saw that it didn't bother me, she was more at ease. In fact it seemed she was more disgusted with it than I was!
 I told her its a place to sleep and will be fine. Meeting her mom went alright, we both don't know each others language so it was done via Olya's translating. After about half hour Olya asked if I wanted to sleep, it was about 8am and I needed it badly. She then offered to go to the beach and I could sleep on the beach, but I didn't want that so I opted to sleep a few hours in the soft bed. Olay said she was tried too after staying up all night and being at a dance club.
 
 I excused myself and went to lay down, all I remember was sinking into the soft bed, and upon my second breath I was out. I have never fallen asleep like that before, it was a euphoric feeling like the time I was on morphine for two weeks. We both woke at about noon and prepared for the beach, it was hot out already, and I went to sit on the deck while Olya got ready inside. Moments later Olya emerges from the boxcar in a little bikini, big shades and some 10cms beach heels!
 I was so happy I had my sunglasses on so her mom couldn't see my eyes popping out while sitting across from me! Wow, what a site for tired eyes! The past few days were all washed away, and now I was finally with Olya and about to enjoy the beach.

  What I should have known in hindsite is that I need a few days to be 100% after flying and riding to Ukraine. I was nowhere near my norm, and it showed. We had a nice time that day, talking, drinking and just enjoying our time together. As evening came I offered to take them to dinner somewhere along the promenade where her mom has told her she wants to ask me some questions. "Oh oh questions?"
 "Yes Don, she wants to know things."  I was bracing myself to find the right answers, and during dinner they were mostly benign, and then one question I guess was too much for Olya to ask me, and gave her mom as wave of the finger. I never did find out what she asked.
 
 Later that evening her mom went back to the boxcar/cabin, and Olya and I went down near the beach. I thought it was going well, she was showing all kinds of affection, and we called it a early night in part to both of us being tried. Next day she wanted to have some food, and we went walking to find some woman selling cooked food from the trunk of her Lada. Now I won't get too far into it but we had some mashed potato's and meat. What I didn't know is that the meal also had some egg in it, though not enough to make me real sick, just enough to make my stomach sore and give me nausea. I am deadly allergic to eggs. Of course this put a damper on my mood, and I was becoming increasingly boring.

 It was back to roasting on the beach. 30c and no shade, she wanted to swim and I didn't, I just didn't feel too good but never told her, add on being still tried wasn't helping matters. Not that there was ever a uncomfortable moment, but as the day progressed I knew I was losing her fast.
  I finally decided to just come out and say it, (no I didn't ask to marry me, I'm not a one week wonder) instead I asked her how she saw things going between us. Well the answer I got was not only the one I didn't want to hear, but it was depressing as well. I knew it too because of the way things had been going. She basically said I wasn't the happy fun man she knew from all those phone calls in Canada. I knew it was true, and I cursed myself for not taking some days to recoup my energy before seeing her. I thanked her for her honesty, and it was the first time I was at a loss for words in her company.

 That evening we headed out to some dance club, my cash flow was dwindling down to about $20, but I still really enjoyed being with her, and judging by her body language, I was having a hard time believing I was a write off in her books. She still continues to hold my hand, wrap her arms around me, and show enough affection to make me hold out some hope. It was going to be our last night at the Azov sea and I was thinking it may be the last night I will ever see her.  My heart was falling for her, and I was shocked by how much I liked her, as I don't tumble like that. However I guess anything was possible. We ended the night quite late, and from what she told me on the beach that day was starting to get the better of me. I was thinking too much about my failure, and getting in a solemn mood.
 Next day it was back to the beach, for the last day of roasting. Olya could tell I was sad over the way it was turning out and she asked me about the other girls I would be meeting. "I don't have any, if I never knew you I would of never come to Ukraine," was my reply. I remember those words too vividly as she was surprised, saying most men come and meet many others. I then added, "I told you before I was only writing you." And with those words I made her feel very guilty. It was never my intention to do that, it just came out that way. She received a phone call from her work later on, and they confirmed that she was needed in Kyiv. 

 Now I was hoping that we would of lasted longer than a day and a half, but it was now on to plan B. I asked to borrow her phone as I needed to call Guy in Odessa, and tell him I was on my way there much sooner than expected. In speaking with Guy, I asked if his spare room was open yet and he tells me its rented until the end of the month, 26th or around there.  I say ok I'll make other arrangements, and I will be in touch.
 Basically my plan B was to live with Guy in Odessa, maybe work at his school and meet some girls. Olya and I took the bus back to Zaporzhye and we made a stop at her auntie's for dinner. It was nice to meet her and Olya's father who turned out to be a hockey fan. When I told him I was from Winnipeg he paused and replied, "Winnipeg Jets!" I was shocked that he knew of this team, as I didn't think it's history was known back in the USSR days. The Jets were the first team to bring in Europeans to play in Canada and they even played against some of the top USSR teams back in the 70's. I think they even took on the red army once. It was a ground breaking team, and they paved the way for todays NHL.
 
 Anyways after dinner, Olya her dad and I went to see her off at the train station for her trip to Kyiv. As the train pulled out, I thought,"shit, I planned on being here six months and so far my plan is blown after only three days."   It's going to be a long road ahead.
 Ivan dropped me off at the Intourist Hotel where Olya had set me up, and even gave me some numbers to call to meet other girls. Gee thanks girl, I knew she meant well but I didn't want to hear it. I had also decided to just stay in Zapcity, I would of needed to rent a place in Odessa until Guy's room was freed up, and I really didn't want to totally give up on Olya, even though I knew it was not going to happen.

 When Olya returned from Kyiv I called her up to tell her I was still in Zapcity and we met up later on. Everything was as it was good times enjoying ourselves. While she was gone I met a guy who had been scammed by a Aweb girl, he had almost a week left, and his date was finished after one night of her taking a kick back on the sushi bill. I'm telling you newbies, any girl who wants sushi on a first date is nothing but trouble.
  I offered Dave a chance to meet an agency owner that Olya used, and maybe he could salvage some of his trip. He agreed, and later that day Karina came to meet us. I told Dave not to mention Olya to her as I was told she didn't know I was in town. It seems Olya had kept me from her. So we're sitting at a cafe and Dave mentions what kind of girl he'd like to meet. Instantly she offers up Olya! I keep it quiet, and as she places a call to her I am thinking WTF have I just done?  I tell Karina I'm not interested in meeting any girls, so she works on getting Dave some dates.
 Afterwards we head back to her office and she goes through her database showing him some girls. Now the date with Olya had already been set, and I didn't have any time during this to tell him that's the girl I was with at the beach! Finally she prints off Olya's profile for him, and I tap his foot gesturing him. Well I was hoping he would of declined meeting her, but instead he tells Karina that he has met a guy in the hotel who was seeing her. Oh my goodness! I kept my poker face and was wondering where this was going, finally he turns to me and says, "And you are?"  So in my best accent I say, "Steve from Minnesota." 
 I was thinking why is he trying to have a laugh at my expense, but I held on to being Steve. He never did meet Olya because of me, and now Karina is wanting to get to the bottom of all this. Karina said it was impossible because Olya was only serious about one man from London. My heart hit the floor, I can't tell you how that felt hearing those words knowing Karina didn't know who I was. And what could I do or say at that point? I kept my mouth shut, even as she went on about she wanted marriage with him, but he didn't. It was crushing to say the least, my insides churned for hours, and I had to keep it all to myself.

 The next day I get a few phone calls to my hotel room without any one replying, and I'm thinking it's all going to come out now and Olya will be in deep shit. We met the following night, and I could tell she was disturbed and wanted to ask me some things, but didn't know if I was in on it, or how to go about it. It began in a humorous way, she was asking if there was a guy in the hotel from USA, and if I knew him. I told her I did and I lied to her earlier about it, to keep her from having to lie to Karina. Olya and I spent the evenings together having dinner and some drinks. We would talk about almost anything, than one day while walking I couldn't resist any longer, a moment came up in the conversation and I popped the question. 
"What about the man from London?" Well the look on her face was one of astonishment. She was speechless and asked how I knew about him. I told him Karina told me, and she didn't know who I was at the time.  I didn't bother to bring up the fact she wanted him, and he was moving slower than she wanted. I just didn't want to bring it up, but he and I both were writing to her at the same time except he showed up first, and her heart was taken.
 She made it out to be like he wasn't going to be in the picture, and I had seen enough of Olya to know she's a terrible liar. But I let it go, I didn't see any point to bringing it up.

 My time in Zaporzhye was coming to an end, and even though Olya and I continued to hang out together, on the last night I ever saw her we were in the taxi to drop her off at home, when she offered to come to Odessa. I thought this was very strange ,and said how could she come if she hasn't enough days off to come down? She made it sound like she could find the time, but I told her (insert foot in mouth)That she only wanted a holiday to come down to Odessa and sit on the beach. I added in somewhere that it's also because she has never been there.......
   Well Olya sits up from laying on my lap and we arrive shortly at her place. Out of the car I usually get the nightly kiss on the cheek, but this time it was a firm handshake!  Oh did I push some buttons Olya? 

 Earlier she agreed to see me off at the train station, and when I called her she was telling me she'll meet me there. I knew she was still mad and off to the station I went. High noon was fast approaching and there was no sign of Olya, so I called and she never answered. Well I guess I did piss her off more than I thought.
 Sadly I got on the train to Odessa with forty four stops and a seventeen hour ride. What a slow ride it was. Forty four stops I couldn't believe it. Staring out the window I had a lot of time to think about my failure to win her heart. Going over and over what I did wrong, it was a horrible ride to say the least.
 
 This is the only train I have been on where the electric grid ends, and they hook up a diesel to haul it for a while. I can say this, the ride with diesel has much more vibration than the electric locomotives, and no, I had no food with me again.

[jone]

Great report Don.  I can feel your sadness from it. 

Mexperience with trains in Ukraine is that they make stops so the locals can sell you food.  Was that not the case?

[raba6999]

Very interesting read albeit the sadness of the story... I wish things had turned out better for you.

I think it reflects more on the difficulty of the endeavour than your actual performance. The emotional buildup for the trip and the relationship is huge and when rubber finally meets the road, a lot of things get mixed up and the slightest thing can make it go downhill very fast.

I also think that it reinforces the idea that some of us are having that it might be better to go there, wherever "there" is for each of us with very little expectations and take things from there, spend time with the locals and try to mingle for a few months. I think our true nature can be best shown that way and expectations in a relationship can build up in a more natural, controled way... That's my opinion.

I wish you all the best of luck!

[Chicagoguy]

Donhollio, what have you learned from this adventure, which it really was for you, or will this come at the end.

[Donhollio]

  Even though this was my 3^rd trip I still didn't venture off the train for fear of not getting back on. The thought of this and losing my only bag of travel ware kept me on board at all times. Besides the thought of eating more egg food scared me to hold off eating unfamiliar things.

 Raba your words are very true for most of us I would think. In my opinion it takes a huge amount of tenacity to keep at it.

Donhollio, what have you learned from this adventure, which it really was for you, or will this come at the end.

 I learned lots. I think it'll come out as the story continues, thanks everyone for reading it so far.

 

[Donhollio]

  I roll into Odessa and reminisced about being there two years prior. Armed with a slight knowledge about the city centre layout, I make my way to the good pay phones if such a thing is possible.
 I walk to the Black Sea Hotel to use the pay phone and get some cash from the ATM. I call up Guy and he gives me his home address, and tells me how much I should be paying for a ride to his home from there.
 Well the first driver tries to tell me its very far and will cost 100UAH! That's about 75-80 higher than the norm so I make my way to the local McDonald's, and find a more civil fare.
 Hotels are know to have higher prices for most services, and a two block walk can save you money and more importantly, not getting taken advantage of.
 Pulling up to guys was refreshing, its a nice little home with clean air and low on noise. It was a complete transformation from my hotel stays. Guy gave me a tour of his home, and showed me how the place all works. Lot's of ways to doing things in his home, I needed to remember how to lit this, flush that, and how to start this and that. Reminded me of cottage living.  After the long ride I needed some rest so I took a nap, and later we went to the beach. It was nice to sit on some foreign shore and speak English, all the while seeing slim topless girls!
 Guy was wanting me to teach at his school after some training to see if I could do it. I was not really crazy about trying it but after some days passed, I headed off with him to check it out. Within minutes it became very clear to me that teaching wasn't going to happen, as I knew no grammar rules or how it all fits together. Oh well I speak one language and I do good at it, just don't ask me to explain the rules. His classes were made up of mostly girls, I'd say 80% for most levels and it was nice to see the girls all into learning! There were several I would of 'enjoyed' helping much more. All were so positive and eager to learn.
 Other nights were spent in the nightclubs of Arkadia which is an entertainment area of Odessa along the seacoast. This was the second time I had been there, and those unique clubs are of world calibre. Some nights were good and some were boring, it really all depended on my mood, and sometimes my thoughts on Olya kept creeping up and pissing me off.
 I still had yet to get a phone but was working on it, and I wanted to speak with Olya again. So I had Guy call up her aunt's home (Olya was staying there) The aunt knows Spanish as does Guy so there would be no problem should Olya not be there.
 After a couple of minutes in Spanish, Olya and I are speaking on the phone. Things seemed alright, I pissed her off and she wasn't interested in speaking to me. But I guess she was more forgiving than most, and I told her I'd like to call once I get my phone. She agreed and I was relieved, and why wouldn't she? She was getting free English lessons from a English speaker. Once I had my phone I would call her every few days to just chat about whatever came up. She was wanting to know about how my search was going, and if I had met with Anna again. As well just how life in general was in Odessa. Anyways I got sick shortly after swimming in the sea, and couldn't move around for most of the week. The only highlight was Olya's SMS's being concerned about my health.
 Things seemed fine between us and I was thinking she could be a good friend down the road, but that wasn't to be. She no longer answered my phone calls, and I had made a point of not calling her more than twice a week, all I wanted was her friendship. From the way I saw our telephone conversations she wasn't annoyed by them, or gave any indication that she wanted off the phone at any time.
 I decided to call her at home on the land line, she answers and said her phone was stolen while she was at a nightclub. I could tell she was lying about having her cell phone stolen, like I said she wasn't very convincing at telling lies. I let it roll off again and mentioned that I may leave Ukraine very soon and thought maybe I would stop in Zaporzhye to say goodbye to her. She didn't sound too comfortable with that suggestion and just said, "I don't know."  We chatted for a few minutes and it sounded like she was busy, so I asked if calling her this coming weekend would be better, yes was the answer.  We said our goodbyes and I waited for Saturday to arrive.
 
 It was a beautiful sunny clear day and thought why not call her from the beach. Maybe she will hear the background noise and wish she was here. Or clang some beer bottles and let her know I'm not a boring guy after all!! Sitting in my lounger chair I make the call, there was no answer. About a week went by and I decided to call her home, I was pissed at her for not answering the phone and planned on letting her know.
 I know normally back home I would of given up on this girl from day three, but I found when I am in Ukraine boredom often reigns, and I tend to pursue things a bit too much. The days can be long and uneventful until the night comes, only to have it start all over when you wake in the morning. Long walks and sitting on the beach can all be good in moderation, but for me it wears off quick.
 
 So I made the call, her mom answers and the little Russian I knew and tone which she was asking was that she was wanting to know how my girl search was going. She seemed happy to hear from me again, and I asked where Olya was. Her mom gave me a number to call. I start writing down the numbers and realise they're the same numbers as her mobile phone, the one she said was stolen. I repeated the numbers back, and even got the house cleaner to confirm the numbers.  In a sober tone I thanked her mom and she could tell I was sad by getting the number. My Russian wasn't good enough to continue with questions, and it really didn't matter as Olya had told me by her actions what she wanted from me, nothing.
Afterwards I sent Olya a SMS telling her she didn't need to be that way, and she could of just been honest. I know its not easy but she didn't seem to have any problem with it on the beach. She never replied, and I didn't expect her to. Afterwards I realised that I pushed too far with her. I have girls as friends back home and this wasn't much different, so I thought. But for her it was her way out and to move on to find Mr. Right. She didn't need male friends clinging on to her life.

 In the meantime I was hanging out with Anna and some of her friends. It was great to have a little normal atmosphere, and Anna was always easy on the eyes.

[ML]

Hey Don, you lost me here.

Olya asked about Anna, but I don't remember you ever talking about an Anna.

And I can't comprehend you are so alone in Odesa with a zillion Gals there.

[Donhollio]

 Hi ML,
 Anna entered the picture on my first trip I did a 'visit one', I wrote about her in reply #5.  I had mentioned to Olya about Anna at some point after the 'crash with her.'

[Donhollio]

  So after some weeks had past, and not one prospect in sight, I began hitting the i-net cafes heavy in search of a better city to try. I refused to use AFA or Aweb, more so Aweb due to its dishonest management style. AFA couldn't give me a office to stop in at so I discounted them on that alone. I had also gotten in contact with a woman who once did work for Aweb, and she offered to help me, but again I felt like I gave them enough money. I settled in on Athena agency, they were open and very helpful. It's too bad the girls in her agency (that I chose) were not that interested in meeting me, or any guys for that matter.
 I will give you a quick rundown. All the girls I picked spoke English without the aid of a translator. First girl had met what must of been a hundred guys, playboys, losers and more losers. She was a complete snob but again, I had nothing better to do that day, so I sat and chatted with her on a bunch of subjects.
  Politics seemed to be a keen interest of hers, it was the only girl I met who spoke about it. The other three I picked were duds. One expected me to show up with about 1 hours notice. It wasn't possible, and she never bothered to call the office back to arrange another meeting. I am guessing but she may have thought I was renting some apartment in the city centre, making it fast to meet.
 Another stood me up claiming her father took ill suddenly and couldn't make it. And my favorite girl was a airline stewardess, somewhat odd yet I found her interesting.
 
 There was nothing I was interested in at Adam and Eva, so my new cities plan was in the early stages. Guy wasn't happy with me wanting to leave, but understood why I was. He had his girlfriend try and find someone for me but came up empty. One warm summer night Guy invited a couple of students over for drinks and conversation. I was out and entered the yard a bit after they arrived. With soft light beaming down there she was, Sexy Sveta! It was the first time I saw her and Donhollio was in lust to the 10th power! But she was a tough one to get close to, and I just let it be that she wasn't all that dialled into me.

 Days slipped by and I kept procrastinating without doing much of anything. Going to my favourite pizza restaurant Pan Pizza for lunch, walk a few hours and sit in the internet cafes for a couple of hours. After I would either take a bus or taxi back home. Some days I would walk half the way and get a ride for the last few kms. I was getting nowhere with finding a girl, and yet at the same time I didn't give it the attention you'd think one would being so far away from Canada. With September almost gone I began to ask myself what was the point of remaining in Ukraine. I did socialise with Anna weekly and that was nice, but it didn't fill the void all the time. To make matters seem even more dismal, I received an email informing me that Olya had flown to London, and she wasn't coming back.  I must of stared at that computer screen for two minutes before moving to the next line. I couldn't believe it, even though I knew about her interest in him, I just never gave much thought to her flying there.
 So now that my day was ruined I was happy Guy and a couple of men were going out to Palladium nightclub. I was not in a good mood, and while leaning up against a railing up comes a blond girl asking if I speak English. She seemed so playful with her tossing her hair from side to side, and giving a cute little laugh. It was exactly what I needed at that moment, and I really think that after two months of failure if my luck didn't turn around very soon, I was going home.

  Days before all this I called up an ex bedmate just to shoot the shit without any language hassles. It was good to speak with her, not that she was very happy with this "stupid" idea of being here to find a girl when I had one waiting at the other end of the phone. But I was here, and not back home for a reason.
 In the end Kristina and I spent the night together at her place until the wee hours. Then she asks if I will go shopping with her for some food. Shopping at 7am?  Wow, ok.   
 It was all very entertaining with her dragging me by the hand, up and down the aisles looking for food to make some fish soup. I was shocked to hear how demanding she was with the staff, but I said nothing.
 To my suprise she didn't ask or even hint for me to pay for the food, and once outside we kissed and she sent me home in a taxi. Agreeing to meet again later in the week seemed like a good idea, but if I could of only seen into the future ....   Why do I always seem to find them? 
 We did meet a few more times that week, but I knew it wasn't going to work. So I planned my departure to return to Zaporozhye. A city I told Olya I wouldn't go to if she wasn't there. But F@#$ HER !  She's gone and I have my own life to fullfill.

[ML]

Don, what year is this taking place?

[Donhollio]

Don, what year is this taking place?

 Sorry I forgot to add that for this trip. The year was August - November 2005

[Donhollio]

  'Sweet' Kristina she likes me but she's a wild one. And of course it's complicated like just about everything here. We've spoke about a lot of things and she's even suggested getting a flat to rent when or if I come back to Odessa. I not planning on it, and spoke with her about the things that bother me about her. She understands, and trys to reassure me about it, but like I say it's complicated. I have my doubts on her sincerity, and it was around this time that I began wondering what possessed me to even hang out with her. I caulked it up to being in a rut, and after a couple of months in Ukraine I guess I just was open to everyone who I crossed paths with.

 Soon enough I was back on the 17hr train to Zapcity with forty four stops. I checked myself in to the Intourist hotel once again. It sure helps to have some familiarity with places.  I had contacted Athena agency there along with, "jasmine4u." Both have been great to me, Irina and Svetlana at Athena have done a honest job getting the girls that want to meet me. So my first date at Athena went bad, like four minutes long, I couldn't believe it! It was a weekday lunch date. She wanted to meet at a restaurant, and I agreed. (here it comes again)  I got there first, and realised it was a seafood place. I ordered a beer and waited. About twenty minutes later she arrives and coldly takes a seat across from me.
 I told her I'm not eating here and let's go somewhere else. Her reply was that it's the only place she prefered to eat.
  I'm thinking to myself, Yeah that's nice, So I'll sit here and watch you eat than? I told her again I don't eat this food, and now she claimed there was no time to go anywhere else. I offered some tea. No. So we left. I said goodbye and that was it. 
 She wasn't interested in me at all and that's cool, but to be so stupid to think I'm going to sit and watch her eat was beyond me. When I called Irina to tell her how it went she was shocked to say the least.
 I than had a date that early evening with Elena from the free personals. She was well mannered, spoke very good English, and struck me as very level headed. She said she liked me but I told her I didn't feel the same, I could tell she was down a bit over it, and wished to hear from me again before I was to leave Zaporzhye. I never did call her again.

  Karina from jasmine 4U picked me up at the Intourist and we went to her office. Having not seen her since that Olya/Dave/me event in August, I wasn't sure what to expect. Getting in her car  her first words were, "So the mysterious Steve."  We had a chuckle over it, and no bad feelings were to be had.
 Arriving at her office I think she could tell I was still hurting from the Olya departure. I did my best to move on, but I think my body language was still giving me away. We talked briefly about her and I didn't want to make this a inquiry into her new life abroad, so Karina did what I had asked, and that was to find me someone else. Scanning through her profiles I managed to pick about 3 or 4 girls. All were English speaking, with Karina helping me along the way. I also decided to not base my search on age, and thought I'd just meet who I could.
One night I met Yulia. She was a very nice girl, friendly and willing to show me some of the sites in Zaporozhye. I saw her on a handful of occasions, and we both knew we were not heading down a romantic path. But it was just nice to have a person to share your time with. I still recall gazing into her eyes while she talked and I was thinking if only I had feelings for this girl.
 Another was a young 22 yo dark haired beauty with a very toned body, who worked as a dance instructor. We had a four hour date at a popular place on Lenin prospect. The longest in the FSU if I may add. We got along surprisingly well, fully engaged in each others words and she had the nicest smile. I found her to be so full of life, it was very refreshing after three months. She later asked if I could walk her to the bus stop, and I suggested I will cover her taxi ride home. But she would have none of that, and wanted to stroll up the prospect to her cross street where she would catch the bus.
 Her stop took us forty five minutes to walk there, I was rather tired after all of it ,and still had to walk back to the hotel, that was less than a five minute walk from where we left. The Lenin Prospect is about 15km long. It weaves along the city with long rolling hills, I found it all to be quite nice...on a clear day.
She had told me to call her and I never did call her until a few days later. I never did see her again either as I convinced myself it wasn't going to work, but she was going to make some guy very happy one day.

  Another was a girl closer to my age and as Karina described her as having, "electric eyes" and that she did! Big bright eyes with a typical FSU body to match. She was very pretty, but as the night progressed she struck me a not being the person I'd want to be with. I don't know why I never gave her a second chance she too wanted to meet again, but yet it was after months of being there I began to think I was just going through the paces. Svetlana was worth the second date, and for years after I kept thinking, "what if." I don't recommend this approach to finding a FSU wife, it can do alot of damage to your sleep.

  I also made a call to Kristina during this week, why I don't know but we discussed a host of things. She is not happy I left Odessa, and I did have a hard time believing what she was telling me but I knew in my heart it would not work either. She wants to see me when I get back and I suppose I'll take her up on it.
 
 Zaporozhye was also where I ran into what I felt was my first pro dater. She was on a few agencys websites,  a short good looking stacked blonde, just how I like'm!  We had a lunch date and that day I held off having my usual morning meal of chesse, fruit and slices of meat. So by 2pm I was getting hungry. Ilona agreed to meet me in the hotel lobby and my plan was to just head next door to the resturant for the lunch date. As soon as we met she offered a place to eat. I had never heard of it before so I reluctantly agreed.
 
 I was a nice little place, not busy at all (bad sign) as we were the only ones there. The food was passable, and during our time I asked her what she likes to do during her free time. Well the answer I got was so rehearsed, and it went on for about a minute and a half! It was at this point I knew, this wasn't going to be good. And with her making eyes at the waitress over my shoulder, then saying she should go call a taxi as her lunch time was almost over and she had to return to work.
  I was seated with my back to all the comings and goings in the place, and that only worked to their advantage. She returns and soon and the bill is placed at our table. Almost 300UAH, about $60. I look at her and shes already looking at me with a wearey look on her face. I say nothing, but she could tell I wasn't believing this mediocre food cost the sum on the bill.
  Earlier she told me she has met many guys, and even worked the doors at the AFA socials that came to town. So I think she had this gig almost down to perfection, she just needed to work on her facial expression when the bill comes. I paid the bill and we took a taxi back to my hotel, where we banged our hearts out. After all I wanted to get $60 worth out of her. Well that would of been sweet, but it never happened. That was the end of seeing her for a few days.
 
 In the hotel I met a Canuck from Ottawa, he claimed he was there for tourism and taking in the Cossack history. Seemed strange, but I wasn't about to derail him, even though he asked a bunch of questions on girls and the FSU pursuit. It was good to spend the free time I had with Robert as we did try to find some interesting things to do, since he was travelling as well without an intinery. I suggested he come with me to Odessa, see that city before flying off to Kyiv. He was thinking of just flying to the UK visiting there until his flight home. But I told him about Guy and the fact they both were English teachers helped to convince him to tag along.
 My week in Zaporozyhe was coming to an end. I had wanted to go to Poltava from there, but the agency was never returning any emails, and when I would call them they told me it was a PC problem. I wasted a entire month trying to get what should of been a simple two or three emails, instead turned into a mess. I never did get there, and this is why I planned on returning to Odessa.

  I did see Ilona one more time but it was in a local i-net cafe and she was with some western guy who couldn't get his visa card working. Lucky shmuck! When I turned around to say hello to her she seemed surprised, and quickly went to the booth where the guy was.  As I finished up, I walked past and said, "hope everything works out in the future for you." There was no reply.
 
 Robert and I got back on that pathetic train, seventeen hours on the the little train that barely could. No plane and the bus from what I've been told by one guy we met in the hotel is worse. He had to stand for the first four to five hours! Odessa will arrive at 04:25.
 It's still dark upon arrival, and the city is very quiet. I navigate my way and Robert follows, I get him to the Irish Pub as his room he rented was just across the street. There's something about this city that I embrace, I have never been a fan of cities, but Odessa takes your soul in a way no other city can. Maybe its the seacoast or the pre Soviet architecture, the cobble stone roads, huge trees in the city centre, the people? I suppose its all of these and more, and it is like my second home.
 I later went on my way to Guys home, a forty five minute ride by mini bus. I got settled in and had some quality sleep.
  It was now late October and I had been in Ukraine since the second week of August, Odessa was a comforting place. I knew my way around, had English support in place, and Anna along with a few friends. Even though Anna was going through some tough personal times we did manage to meet during my stay there at least twice a week. I did my best to help her along, but I think time was going to be the only cure. It pained me to see my friend like this, as she was the reason for my first trip, and I was fortunate to have spent many hours with her, and her friends. In all it was very nice.
 
 Guy enjoyed meeting Robert and tried to convince him to give teaching at his school a try, Robert said he would give it some thought. It was Halloween eve and even though its just starting to gain in popularity in Ukraine, the Irish Pub had a special night of it. Costumes, games, and even a pumpkin carving contest!Though the highlight for me was seeing two children maybe seven years old playing the gambling machines! Even Matt who lives there running his rental flat business found it so disturbing!  Get'em while their young! It's too bad the photo I have of it is of such poor quality, its not worth posting.
 
 During this time I worked on a new city to visit, Dnepropetrovsk. More hours spent in the i-net café getting it all together, and waiting on replies. 

 More on that later.

[ML]

Oh Don !

Wish I could have posted my 'How to do it' 15 years ago for you to read.

But maybe it wouldn't have been your 'cup of tea' anyway.

I spent one to one and half months in FSU several times.  Don't know if I could have lasted 4-6 months.

Thanks for reposting for those of us who never read the first time around.

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0

[Noch1]

I have read most of Don's TR before. But is fun to read again, even though
we know how it ends. The story is honest ( which most would never admit to)
Need more pages a day Don:)

PS, this place really needs a smiley upgrade 

[Donhollio]

 Odessa in late October gets rather quiet when compared to the summer season. I'd have to say its like most other Ukrainian cities during this time, all the outdoor patios are packed away and the leaves start changing. But by the end of the first week in September the tourists have gone home, all the beaches are shutdown for the year, and its kinda empty. The locals call this the velvet season, as it was explained to me the air and sea are the same temperature. I spent my time in the internet cafes, browsing the sites for more girls to contact. Hours & days later I firm up my plan for the city of Dnepropetrovsk. I sent my info off to 5 star introductions and had a prompt reply, which was refreshing after my Poltava agency experience.
 When I recieved the agencys reply I was told all the girls agreed to meet me. When she said that I laughed and told her,"I don't have that kind of luck!" But with the way things have been going for me in Odessa I really want to get out. I didn't fully believe either, but I knew enough that they were boosting things to get me to buy their services. In the end I also made some head way with the Poltava agency, they have my info and photo's and I was planning to go there after my Dnepropetrovsk visit. One agency takes a couple of days and another one took over a month, with the same info.

 Before I left I had been hanging out with Kristina, she surprised me with the things she'd say to me when I was in Zaporozhye, but I knew it would be a bad idea to continue with her. It was Saturday night and Guy and some of his teachers and students including sexy Sveta were heading to the Yo nightclub. Very interesting place as are most of Odessa's nightclubs, nothing about them is ordinary. As time ticked by Kristina was getting annoyed by the loud "Boom-Boom" as she called it, and wanted to leave to go elsewhere. I was all for it as I hate dance music, and was game for anything. We went walking to find a taxi, and then out of nowhere she starts in about me and money.
 Two nights before I told her I didn't have alot on me maybe 200 UAH, and I couldn't take more out of the ATM for another twenty four hours. I took a bunch out earlier in the day, and left it at home. So she didn't want to understand all this, but I had enough to cover it all. She brings this up again and I tell her to drop it. I'm sick of hearing about it.
 She then tells me that's the way it is in Ukraine, the men always pay. I told her again if I can't take money out how do I pay?  She lives in a cash world, there's no credit cards. I suppose she thinks it's a big lie on my part. So finally we get into a taxi and head off.
 We make a stop at her sisters along the way and leaves me in the taxi, saying she will be back in a minute. After 10 minutes shes not back and the driver is getting pissed at me. I call and there is no answer. I tell him to return me to the Yo Club. At this point I've had enough of her, she finally calls about a half hour later wondering where I am. I tell her, and she's not happy and wants me to return to her. I tell her no, and she can come back here. I think you can tell how this is going to end ?
 
 I send her an SMS telling her goodbye. Now Kristina is really mad and I didn't really care, you don't want to show any respect towards me, go to hell. She calls back again and rants on for about five minutes. She made the call and I guess she wanted to give me a blast, cause she never wants to use up her time on the phone. All the while I'm in the WC at the Yo Club swearing at her in English, and this guy walks by and starts laughing! I could just imagine what he was thinking (another westerner trying to make it with our women.)
 Kristina hangs up on me, and then the SMS start, and she was fuming! I haven't spoke to her since, she's nuts and I'm out. However at least it filled the void at times while I was here. And I must admit she was a lot of fun half the time, but that's no good for anything serious. After all I came here to find a good one, not someone like this. I just finished it off by sending a SMS, since she won't answer my call, by wishing her the the best in the future. I do expect next week to be more normal than this one. 
 
 Robert on the other hand was making the best of his stay in Odessa. He went on a few dates, a night at the Yo Club with us, didn't take in any history, and was ready to head off with me to Dnepropetrovsk.
So it was back to the seventeen hour train that comes complete with forty four stops at every village one could imagine. It was beginning to feel like that movie Groundhog Day. I have to say the slow speed this particular train travels allows me to sleep quite fine, and having Robert with me makes the ride seem a fraction of the time it was when I did it alone.
 We arrive in the morning and I call the agency as we have an apartment booked through them, and we're looking to get a shower, separately of course. The taxi driver is hopelessly lost and very confused as to the address, yet we're in the centre and one would think the guy would of known the streets.  The 'swank' flat was something you'd ask yourself, "a designers first kick at the cat?" I was hoping to find some tufted plush velvet but none was to be found!

 Afterwards I arrive at 5 stars and meet one of the girls working there, Katya. She's a knockout! But she's all business, and was ready to get started setting up dates of the girls I had asked to meet. Turns out Angelika network let's the girls pick their English ability, not the agency. This can get annoying as one girls English rating of three for instance is hardly a level three. Anyways most of the girls wanted a translator, and many weren't able to have a basic conversation even though they claimed to have a level three.
 So Katya went to work on finding some girls who could carry on a conversation in English. She came up with a bunch and I deleted the list down to about six or seven. From there Katya called them up and gave a brief description about me, and they all were interested in meeting. I later found out what Katya would tell to the girls. Always something positive along with a few stats of course so the girl would show up and I would generate some money for the office, fair enough. I had met two and they went nowhere, thankfully it was mutual. However one was a bit rude with me, yet after Kristina it was just something to laugh at!
 I suppose when she first walked into the agency office, that three second rule kicked in. I wasn't interested in her at all, but thought we're here let's see what may happen. My other option, call it a very early night, so you forge on.
 Out on the street, she points and asks if this place will be good to eat at. The parking lot has its fair share of luxury auto's, so I tell her no we'll go next door, I'm not buying you dinner.
 In the other nice restuarant we have a seat in the lounge and she orders a juice, I get a beer, and I can tell she's not in the mood for any of this. Our drinks arrive and I make the most of the situation, even though she was short with her answers. She asked me some things and we made small talk. She downs the juice in a few minutes, and I ask if she'd like another. She does! Ohh goodie!
 Another juice comes and more useless chat about things, then I have only a gulp left in my beer so I ask, "Would you like to go now?" 
 Da!!! (Yes) was her reply, and she guzzles the remaining juice down, gets up from the table and goes to the coat rack, all in about 10 seconds! I remain seated finishing my beer, then get up and help her with her coat.
 We walk outside and approach the curb where her mini bus had just pulled up, she steps on without missing a beat, and never looks back. You're not even going to thank me for the two glasses of juice!
 
 Never to be seen again.

[Donhollio]

  My other deadend date went slight better, however we both weren't having a connection and although she spoke good English, she didn't have much to say and chose to sit and enjoy her salad. Whatever, if a late afternoon salad and drink is a highlight in your day, than who am I to trash it.
 I then had a date with a girl I wouldn't of picked if it weren't for Katya at 5 stars. At first I was leary of meeting a girl fourteen years my junior, but Katya told me she's a very nice girl. So I thought why not, it beats sitting around the apartment and walking endlessly around the city for hours. During these walks I would drop in to a hotel and see what they had to offer. Well it wasn't much, $60 a night and I'd give it maybe one star. An apartment is the way to go hands down.
 
 Today was the day to meet Olga! She was as sweet as the agency had said, and it was nice to just head out and have some laughs, and not have to worry about her freaking out on me like Kristina. During our 4+ hour date I mentioned to Olga that I needed a place to rent, as the tacky place I was in wasn't worth the $80 they were trying to get from me. So she went to work getting some numbers for me to call.

  I never really questioned how she was able to find these people, but figured it may just be that she has met a lot of guys and knew of the places they stayed. Back at the apartment Robert and I were disscussing how our day went, I told him about Olga, and how nice it was to meet her. He was departing for Kyiv soon, than back home. So I needed to find a place soon, as the $80 a night was going to eat up my budget faster than I had wanted.
 The good thing about staying in Odessa and living with Guy was that the rent was about $130 a month, with a housekeeper. A shitty housekeeper but none the less, a housekeeper. Now I was using up more money than that in two days, and after being in the country for about thirteen weeks, I had to keep a watch on where the money was going. Robert and I would head out and see some sights when we had nothing on the agenda, however living in a apartment isn't always without its problems.
 In the morning we both headed out and as soon as we were downstairs some lady starts in on us! We didn't have a clue what she was going off on, until we peiced it together that she thought we were bringing working girls up to the unit. We laughed it off, and assured her it wasn't us who had those loud girls last night!
  We killed a few hours and went to have some food, I asked Olga to meet me after we both ate and it worked out good, because her classes were finished at that time. We met Olga outside and I said my goodbyes to Robert, as his time to depart to Canada had come. We both agreed to keep in contact. It was great having him with me for almost two weeks, it sure helped pass the isolation you can experience being here for so long. I'm happy to say we still remain in touch, and he recently got married to a girl, but not from the FSU.
 
  5 stars was doing an excellent job at setting up girls to meet. She asked if I wanted to meet another girl who was very serious, and spoke good English. Her name was also Katya. She never came up in my original search from Odessa, as I had my height restriction of 170cm. Katya was 175cm. I had never dated a tall girl, with me being 173cm, but was willing to give it a go.
 
 By this time I was getting my girls mixed up, during my lunch date in the middle of Katya's workday, I mention her being a doctor. Opps...... She gave that sly smile, and told me I must have her mixed up with some other girl. Uhh yeah, sorry.
 She was ok with it, and she offered up her email and telephone number during our drink and salad. Walking back near Karl Marx she said I can call her, and we'll meet again! At this time I was begining to wonder what if I had started looking in this city months ago, instead of wasting so many weeks sitting in Odessa. I was thinking maybe my luck had changed after all! In two days I have second dates with two girls, where as in Odessa it was hopeless. I was also lazy in Odessa whereas now I was without the comforts of there. I can say the agency girls are a completely different mindset in Dnepropetrovsk, which obviously was working in my favour.
 
Olga seemed happy to be out with me, and I wasn't finding anything to complain about with her, so all was looking good! We head off in a taxi to go see one of the apartments. The view was nice, it overlooked the river and at night the bridge close by was lit in rainbow colors. But the place was in need of a total renovation, everything was old and I suppose for the $25 p/n I paid, I shouldn't of expected much else. But it was a change from the other joint, however while you had the view, I was awoken at 5am by the traffic. It was horrible and I couldn't sleep there another night.
 I was enjoying my time with Olga so much so that I hadn't called Katya for that second date. Olga was asking how long I was going to be in Dnepropetrovsk, I told her it could be a day, a week, or months. As it all depended on how things went for me. I'm thankful I found little Olga, I was seeing her daily and even cancelled two other dates to spend time with her.
 She was also inquiring about how many other girls I was here to meet, she understands that she wasn't the only one. I did find it difficult telling her about these dates but she's cool with it, and I told her I'd rather spend my time with her, and not them. This pleased her of course. Olga never thought I would call her back after the first date, and the SMS I sent her really made her feel good. I don't think many of these girls get compliments very often, what would be considered "cheesy" in Canada isn't here. She showed my SMS to her friend and she too was equally impressed. I didn't think it was a "fromage" SMS at all, but Rob thought it was a bit of one. All I said was more or less "her smile and beautiful eyes can clear up any rainy day." The weather's been bad for almost a week, so it was kind of fitting.

[Donhollio]

  It was during this time in Dnepropetrovsk that I seeked out another agency I had not heard of until my  stay in Zaporozhye for the second time. Cindy Agency was to be the next agency I used, I had been warned by one guy that they are not the most honest agency. So I figured I would just drop in to their office down on Karl Marx and see what happens.
 In the very small office were a group of girls, with one girl up front handling all the western men looking for love. I took a seat next to one guy and he sparked up a conversation on how the search was going. I told him I had been at it since August, and it's now November so....not good! But hell it was fun sometimes. Little did I know this was going to be the start of some good camaraderie of my 13 weeks in Ukraine.
 While Jim and I were talking another chap came in, he was younger looking than both of us, and he took a seat on the otherside of the room. Again Jim didn't take long before he had the UK guy telling us of his life's love story. We were laughing and Richard seemed to have a similar outlook on it as I did, if it happens it happens, find some humour in it and keep going.
 Jim's date shows up, and he's off but not before we exchange phone numbers saying we'll meet up tomorrow. Richard is getting taken to his apartment, and I ask if he has a UA phone? He doesn't and seem reluctant to get one, preferring to use his UK number. Though Jim and I told him to buy a SIM card he declined our advice and later regretted it with his $600 bill upon his return home.

 While I was going through the profiles, I had picked out a few, and the office would call the girls and see if they'll meet me. It was also during these couple of days that I met Henry, at first I thought he worked for Cindy Agency as he was speaking Russian to another interpreter who was with a client. It's a very small office and they were talking half English half Russian. She was saying how good his Russian was, and he downplayed it.
Then I mentioned he should call my friend Guy in Odessa and work at his English school. Henry than made some reference to his city and it turns out he's from Winnipeg! It was hard to believe, all this distance and we live a few kms away from each other. Larissa was enjoying her time with her client who I think hired her all day long for two weeks. She wished Henry luck with his search and even though I said maybe two words to her, she remembers me because I was wearing my McLenin's t-shirt.  It has Lenin's head under the golden arches on the front, with the hammer and sickle along with some buildings burning on the back. She did laugh when she saw it, as many McD's workers in UA do as well.

http://www.rodastjarnan.com/klader/mclenins-rysk-t-shirt-medium-9919
 
  I leave Henry with his phone number in my phone and I'm thinking how I come to Dnepropetrovsk to meet girls, and wind up having a few guys numbers instead. I leave Cindy Agency and tell them I will drop in tomorrow to see what the agency has lined up.
  I meet up with Olga again, and we have a fun time, and for now after 12 weeks, I'm happy to just have a girl I can have some laughs with. We had gone to some Turkish places she was really into the water bong, she called it something else but I forget.
 I was without my traveling companion Robert, but with the other three guys I should be able to fill my daytime hours doing what we guys do to kill time between waking up and waiting, until our date is off work and ready to meet us. For those who have yet to venture over there, the hours can be very long. No reading comprehension of simple street signs, or just being able to ask for directions anywhere and for the most part, no English TV to watch. So you tend to walk it off, and walk, and walk.
 I had my routine down weeks prior. Rise from bed at 10am, get ready over the next 1.5 hours, hit the market for the days supplies, than go eat some lunch. Afterwards do some walking, maybe take in a market or visit the internet cafe, and have a beer or two before heading home to get ready for the early evening date. Yeah get ready for the date... meanwhile I'm spotless, my hands haven't touches anything dirty in weeks. My clothes are always clean, and I'm basically bored, but like all good inmates you have a routine to get through the day. Well so I have been told.

 The following day I met up with Jim and Rich, we have some food at McDonald's and swapped our FSU tales. Jim's was quite interesting, he was in Dnepropetrovsk for the month and had previously been married to a girl from the city. Rich was on his first trip and at 25yo he had already been to Venezuela, and wound up on some sex tour by mistake! So he thought he'd try to not repeat that and had been writting to some Cindy girls, Three of which he came to meet. They both seemed interested and somewhat amazed that I had lasted so long in Ukraine, I was sharing those same thoughts, and my breaking point was not far off.
 
 When I returned to Cindy Agency, she had one date for me. One right out rejection, and I was happy to hear the employee saying you're better off not meeting her. Hmm, I took that as a good sign and that I could put a little more trust in her, as now I could squeeze a bit on the girls personality before committing my time and a bit of cash on.
 My first date with Cindy Agency was with a girl a few years younger than me, who spoke good English, and while we never worked out, I am sure she would make a fine girlfriend. We had our first date at some restaurant, it went very good and the hours passed fairly quickly. She had just gotten a new phone number as she had some men problems and had to change it. It was during this evening that she told me she had a guy stalking her, and it was an ongoing thing for the past two years.
 I was hoping he wouldn't get in the picture while we were out but hey, that would be too much to ask for.
 
               


 

   

[Donhollio]

 Here was my dating situation

So we have a girl who has her very own stalker... 

A nice girl who really is never going to last, yet I enjoy hanging out with her...

Another girl who showed much interest yet I have been unwilling to call her back...

A few really unless dates, but have met some guys to pass our time with...
 

  Life with Rich makes me increase my drinking, and yet it seems normal. I'm starting to think thirteen weeks in Ukraine is too much, and I better bail before I get fully assimilated.
 Days pass with Olga, and things are not progressing as they should if there was any interest. To me thats fine, but I was starting to see where I stood in our friendship. She was leaning towards dinners and drinks, even wanting me to buy her some school book. Which isn't much of a problem, but luring me into a market just to ask as we were walking to the book shop left me feeling somewhat used. We're friends that hang out, that was it. There was no kissing, not anything, so now I'm the shopping mule, and that's not cool in my world.
 One evening while out walking she wanted to go to a restaurant, I wasn't in the mood for it as she approached the place. I told her were not going there, and yet she walked me right to the place! I told her again (feeling slightly used) that "I'm not going there, and if you want to spend time with me, than spend time with me, but it's not going to be all this bullshit."
 
 I wasn't happy and it was at this point I thought why am I bothering, we're not going to become anything, and with that she walked one way, and I went the other. She didn't seem mad, maybe just a bit bewildered as to my behavior, I really don't know.
 Following this I finally called up Katya, she told me she was ill. Great, the "I'm sick bit."  So I told her I will call again, and wished for her to get better soon. A few days later Katya was still ill but wanted to see me and so we met for the second time in a nice pub/restaurant called the Reporter on Karl Marx. Spread over three floors it has a little bit to offer as a setting for any date.

 During this date with her my phone rang, first thing I thought was, "shes going to think its another girl!"  I look at the number and don't reconise it. It's a UA number and shes looking at me like, "are you going to get it?" So I answer it and it's Susha, Olga's friend, and she was wondering if I was with her as she couldn't reach her on her phone. My reply went something like, "Umm, no.. no shes not with me... no I don't know where she is.... yes I will tell her you want to speak with her."
 Katya now has this sly smile, and asked if Susha has lost her friend.  I found it suprising Susha had my number, and maybe Olga was sitting beside her I really don't know. It was the first time I heard Susha speak English, and this was after hanging with her on a handful of occasions. But the Kat was cool with it, and we continued our date. Than another call comes in... Jim wants to know what I'm going to do tonight. I tell him I'm out with Katya, but will be game for something after the date. He's suprised my date was still going after a few hours. Hey what can I say, some dates I've had on this trip have been hours long, it was what I called normal.
 Some minutes pass and my phone rings again! "Hi Richard, yeah I'll be up for something after my date." Was how it sorta went. Katya seems somewhat amused by all this, after all a foreign man is in her country and he has the phone ringing on a regular basis. While Katya and I were chatting away my phone rings again, it's Henry, and you guessed it, he's looking for something to do now as well. I get off the phone and wonder why they don't call each other instead of using me as the 'go to' guy.
 After the call was done, Katya tells me they must miss me, but I tell her they can wait. I hadn't seen her in almost a week and I was really enjoying her style. Calm, liked to smile, spoke good English and wasn't a stranger around western men. Beautiful eyes and a natural flowing mane of blonde hair on a slim body, she was fun to be with, and had some good stories to tell about the guys she has met while looking for a man.

 Our date wrapped up about 10pm and I walked her back to her place, telling her I was hoping to see her very soon. She felt the same. In the four hours or so we talked about many things, she was a very popular girl at the agency's, and the stories she had to tell about the guys ranged anywhere from the hilarious to the very depressing.
 I soon began calling back the guys, Henry was out as it was too late for him. Richard was all ready and Jim was restless. So we went to a pub and had some drinks. Jim bowed out early and Richard and I kept drinking, though I was at a moderate pace.  Across the room was a table with two girls and two guys. Richard always willing to break into a scene, managed to start up a conversation with one of them. The guy at the table who lived in Dnepropetrovsk wanted to join us, as his table was leaving.
 So once again they're three guys and were having some laughs, when he decided it's best to leave and go elsewhere up the street to the Reporter. This time down in the basement there we were sitting at the gothic like table having some beer. I'm alittle bored at this point and so I figure WTF, I'll call up crazy  Kristina! Rich and the UA guy are loaded and yelling, but they were having a ball! I  scroll through my phone and call up Kristina, thinking she'd be up at 3:30am. Rich was laughing at seeing this and couldn't believe I was going to call her. Kristina answers and I say, "Hello" she goes. "Vat! You crazi! I sleep!" And hangs up!
 I was truely suprised she was sleeping, guess theres a first for everything!  About 4 ish we all call it a night and taxi off in different directions.
  As strange as it sounds things with Olga were fine, I guess both of us knew it wasn't going to happen so just enjoy the time while it lasts. One evening Susha and her Turkish boyfriend, whom she met the night we were all at a local club, decided to head out for dinner at a low key place. I figured things with the girl and her stalker should get ironed out before I get caught in the middle of something, I'll have no control over. It was too bad as I liked her, she was nice to talk with and was easy on the eyes with an impressive bosom. So at this point I'm down to Olga and Katya. 

 I spent a few evenings with Olga, Susha, and the Turk. It was all fine, and I never regreted any of it.
We even took in a few dinners together, the last dinner I had with them ended on a memorable note, well aside for the food poisoning. As we were getting ready to leave the restaurant, Olga and I got up and put our coats on, helping with hers first. I pulled out a pack of gum, and offered it to the three of them. Susha and her man still seated declinded, and Olga accepted.
 I wanted to see what the reaction may be from what I was about to do, and I suppose I was not going to worry about the outcome! So I pulled a stick out and tossed it on the table...  "Don!!!" came bellowing from Susha with big eyes of disbelief! The Turk looked somewhat puzzled, and Olga I imagine wondered what was wrong with me. Ah, life in the west! So with my grin about to break wide open, I ever so nicely picked it up from the table, unwrapped it, and suggestively placed it in her mouth. You know when the tongue comes out slightly to grab it, and you slide it in ever so slowly, making her curl the wanting tongue? No? Well try it next time dammit!
  Minutes later we parted ways, saying I'd call her the following day. I instead call a maybe an hour later telling her I feel sick from the food. Olga claims shes fine, and not to worry about it. Well I tossed my dinner moments later, and told her what happened via SMS, wondering if she was still fine.
  She was, and I wondered if I had an egg reaction. Next day I felt fine, and little Olga was not. She was really sick, and I told her it wasn't just me that something we ate was a tad off. She thought it was the mushrooms. I had no idea, all I knew was that it wasn't egg as I was fine, whereas with eggs I'm recouping for a few days.
 
  By this point the fellas and I had somewhat of a routine during the day, we'd meet at McDonald's on Karl Marx, have a bite, then walk about the shops, while we spoke about our previous nights date. Jim had been with one girl for almost four weeks, and he was getting tired of the routine that ran on a cronalogical like pace. He was spending a fair amount of money on the early evening date, one interpreter, dinner for three and taxi fares home. It all seemed like he was going through the paces while there was no excitment from the way he told it to us. While I had fairly normal dating situations, and Rich was having fun with one girl, but we both told him to move on as she was not really interested in him. Of course he never took our advice.
 
 Jim and Rich had not been to 5 Stars agency, so I took Jim there one day. It's always good to go there and see the other Katya, man what a killer! Jim tried to make his move but she told him it was company policy not to date the clients. Well I guess thats a nice way to tell him. During our stop at 5 Stars, Jim and I start talking about girls and I ask Katya about the stalker girl...she was a bit bewildered and than it donned on me, opps wrong agency...  I than tell her things with Katya and I are going good, but she's sick. I also mention Olga is sick too, she looks at me with this look, and I tell her it's the truth, they're really sick! Jim's laughing and I had a chuckle over it too, Katya just smiled with a 'whatever you say Don' look.

  At this point I was dateless with both girls being sick. Jim had a date lined up with another girl and asked if Rich and I along with Rich's date would join them at a club that looked like a old style sailboat.  We agreed, and it would be the first time Jim and I would meet the girl Rich has been talking about.
 We all head off in a small station wagon taxi, theres no room in the seats for me, so being the 5th wheel, I get tossed in the back near the hatch. Way too many minutes later we arrive, I tell them I'm not paying for this ride at all, and we all had a laugh.
 The place was alright inside, Jim and I both wondered why Rich was with this girl, she made no attempt to talk to any of us, and she spoke no English. She wouldn't even speak to Jim's date who was very good with English. Instead she just kept her back to us while taking in the atmosphere. After some time I looked at Jim and said I would dump the chick on the spot. He agreed and we both couldn't believe she totally ignored us, and only turning to Rich when he finally handed her a drink.
 The night ended quite uneventfully, Jim and his date went in a taxi with me, and Rich and his anchor took off in another taxi.
 The next day we met up again, and both of us gave Rich our opinions on her. I was being nice, Jim just said it as I would of wanted. Of course Rich down played it and we both gave up shortly after. Jim was wanting to help him find a good girl, so much so that he called up a girl he had met previously. She was willing to meet with us for a drink during the afternoon, Rich seemed ok with it, and when she entered the room I thought if Rich lands this girl, he's doing damn good! She was a good looking well spoken girl in his age range, and yet he never tried, even though she was open for any conversation with him. Jim kept tring to get him into the mood to carry on, but he for the first time we noticed was rather speechless, go figure. Her time was up and she had to go, never to be seen again.

  So it was back to walking, and I mentioned I needed a pair of gloves as it was now November and the highs were about +2 to +5c. So Jim takes me to a large open market and we see a guy selling gloves. I try on a couple of pairs, and for some reason I ask Jim about how they should fit and if they'd be warm enough. He's from the sunbelt! WTF does he know about winter!?!?  Twelve weeks in country and I must be going bonkers asking a guy about winter apparel when he never sees snow. Anyway I'm now I'm all decked out. I have my new leather jacket I got in Zaporozyhe, and now my leather gloves, which by the way do a shitty job at keeping your fingers warm in the cold temps. Thanks Jimmy!

[Donhollio]

 It was during this time I had mentioned that Katya had a friend about Rich's age, and we offered to hook them up. Rich was in, but this left Jim out as his girl went home every night at the same time, 8:30pm.
 I had planned on the two girls, Rich and myself to just head out to enjoy the night. But Jim was pretty much finished with his girl, he no longer really wanted to see her.
 As well nothing came from his date at 5 Stars. So he worked his way into the still yet to be confirmed night out. Now I understood Jim to be a man on a mission, he wasn't going to waste a day not in the pursuit of a girl, and to be honest I really admired his determination.
After all I had been in Ukraine since the second week of August and it was now mid November, and I really had nothing to show for all my time. While I tried to convince Jim that the girl was only 20-23 years old, and Katya was with me, there wasn't much point in tagging along. But he wanted in, and I suppose I knew exactly how it feels to be sitting in a strange country unable to move about comfortably as one could back home. So I let it slide and thought we would all have fun together anyways, so what would it matter. And since Jim was leaving the following morning back home, I didn't want him to spend his last night alone in his apartment.
 
 The big night finally took place and again we met up at the Reporter. This time the top floor where it's fairly upscale compared to the two lower levels. Rich, Jim and I arrive, the girls were already seated as the three of us entered the room. Jim comment's on how nice Katya looked, somehow I figured he would.
 After doing the introductions Jim and I sat together on the sofa, while Rich sat beside Oylessa and Katya. It all seemed good, Rich and Olyessa were laughing it up, and Jim and I were laughing at Rich's crazy stories that we both agreed we'd never tell a girl on a first date, let alone years down the road!
 
 Katya and I were making conversation and knowing Jim was the 5th wheel (odd man out) I would include him in not wanting to make him feel alone on his final night. Well I guess Jim felt his mission wasn't quite over, and seemed to take a real liking to Katya. I was somewhat surprised that he'd even be trying while I'm still in the room, never mind the fact I had been seeing her, and he was well aware of it! 
 Katya didn't seem to mind speaking with him at all. She was laughing and smiling and it was like now I was the 5th wheel. So I decided I would just sit back and see where this was going, why I don't know, I do know most guys would of asked Jim to shut up or leave, but I just was watching Katya thinking maybe this is one way to prevent a train wreak in the making. There's no point forcing the issue was my thinking. If she had an interest in him it would save me spending time and a possible follow up trip in the future.
 
 To think Jim complained about Henry mowing his lawn with his very good Russian in front of his date, now it seemed I was getting the same treatment only from Jim! At one point I turned to him and called him Henry, hoping it would pop him back into a more courteous self.  It had no effect, then later on he asks me if it's alright for him to ask for Katya's phone number!! WTF!!!
 I'm thinking OK, I'm going to go to the WC and if he asks that's one thing, if she gives, well than there's no point in continuing with her at all, contrary to what she has been telling me.
 So to the WC I go and from there I send Rich a SMS asking if he has asked Katya for the number. The reply comes back, Yes. 
 I just couldn't believe it, here's a guy I enjoyed being around for over a week, and a girl who I really liked, and now I have paired them up with little regard for my feelings. Being somewhat laid back I returned to my spot on the sofa and pretended all was fine. My views on Katya were destroyed, and my trust in Jim was gone. I don't blame Jim for not liking her, she is a beautiful girl, but shit that's my date dude. I convinced myself it was for the best and told Jim I wasn't paying for this night out, he seemed fine with it, but he could tell I was pissed at him.
 
 Outside we parted ways, Jim took a taxi alone, Olyessa went off in a taxi, and I walked with Rich back to Katya's place. I was kinda at a loss for words after the way this night went, and yet Katya was ripping a strip off Jim for being so arrogant??? I told her it didn't seem like you minded his company very much, but she wasn't happy with his actions at all. Now I was really confused, you talk to a guy all night, give your number, and he's an ass in your eyes? Shit I thought I was finally understanding Ukrainian girls but it has all gone downhill after hearing that coming from her.
  At her gate she stood there and I was just wanting to say goodbye, yet she was waiting for a kiss. I wasn't going to budge, then Rich said,"Are you going to give her kiss goodnight?" So I gave in and I was to call her after work, man was I confused.
 Rich was shocked at Jim's behavior, and was thinking very much along the same lines as I in how disrespectful he was towards me, and for the most part I was glad he was leaving in the morning. Rich was telling me he had never met a girl like Olyessa who was so much fun to be around. Together they sure seemed to be having a great time, and I was hoping it would lead to more dates.
 While walking down Karl Marx, Rich asked if there was some club we could go to, I told him of this fire trap of a club called Labyrinth. As the name implies it's a few clubs within a club, up some stairs to a strip joint where the tiny room is full of girls all shaking what they got, and some got a lot! A few nights before Jim and I went there and we took up a stool at the bar, a girl each came to give up a lap dance, we both declined but they didn't take Nyet as an answer!
 
 After a two minutes the song ended and Jim offers 10UAH. 25 was the reply.  "twenty five! Jim shouts back, and I just quietly handed over 20UAH to my girl just to get her off my stool, figuring if I disputed her 'services' I may get tossed out, or roughed up, and or poisoned. So you pay to keep things quiet. After all you wind getting a few punches to the face and that first date will surely be not how you want it to be. I turned to Jim and we both agreed this place was going to take all our cash in the next few songs, so we better go back down and see the dance club.
 
So back to Rich and I. We're both sitting in a grotto part of the dance club and Katya is sending me multiple SMS. Rich is telling me she obviously likes me if shes sitting there sending me messages. True, but the night has really sent me for a loop. Maybe she as well was just being nice, who knows.
 We wrap the night up after a few beers and the following morning Jim is calling me. I'm thinking I should really give him a blast, but I know I should have said something the night before, no point being a telephone tough guy. He was already on the plane and I guess he too was thinking what an ass he'd been. Jim had mentioned to me days before how he had done things that he would never of done back home, nothing illegal just things that went against his moral code.
 He asked if I was pissed at him and I indicated I wasn't overly happy with his performance the night before. He apologised, and I could tell he felt truly remorseful for being such a schmuck, and I told him we'll keep in touch whenever I get back home. By this time the plane was powering up and we said our goodbyes.

[Donhollio]

 A couple of photos from Aug. First one is from my visit to Nuremburg Germany. Went to Hitler's former parade grounds and stood at the podium where he held a rally that you see in those documentaries. I had a chuckle at this guy shouting down to his girlfriend trying to explain how to use his camera. I missed the best moment but still caught him raising his right arm and pointing. The podium is quite high off the ground, and like everything Hitler designed, it was larger than life.

 Second photo is that of Zaporozhye, this was a fairly clear day, I guess the high wind helped keep the blue air from hanging around. From this view I had counted dozens of smoke stacks, the air was harsh at the best of times.

[Donhollio]

 



  With Jim gone the daily routine got a bit empty, however I still had Rich and Henry, oh and of course Katya. It was November and the nights were dipping into the freezing zone. I don't think I had seen the sun shine in weeks, it's always that gloomy grey sky that one has harboured in his mind from seeing old photo's of the USSR. It's gets depressing to me, unlike in Winnipeg it generally was clear skies throughout winter, but I let it fall in the category of not being here to get a winter tan.
 
 I was counting the weeks since departing Canada, and how the seasons had changed, and how this little adventure was panning out. The times with Katya were progressing very well, she liked me and I liked her, I didn't have to go on blind dates, or sit in a I-net cafe scrolling past endless profiles of girls. Things were for the most part as normal as one can get when dating. I kept my apartment, and she lived only about twenty minutes walking distance away, so it was all good.
  It was time for Rich to head back to the UK, his two weeks were up and he wished he could of stayed but his vacation time was over. We agreed to keep in touch and have done so since. Henry was still around and I would meet up and kill the day with him. He wasn't getting anywhere with finding a girl, and seemed to be in a retreat mode. Maybe he just gave up near the end I really don't know. But I do know he came home and took some time off, even contemplated dropping the very idea of finding a FSU girl. But he went about emailing some of the girls he had met in Russia from earlier trips, and has since married a girl from St. Petersburg RU.
 
 With Henry's departure I was without any guys to hang with, my pal Guy in Odessa was too far away for even a cheap chat, Anna was still in Odessa, and I was still concerned for her. She needed time to heal her broken heart, and with the times I spent with her I knew that my timing was all wrong. It bothered me that I couldn't help her to get past all the shit she'd been through with her ex husband.  I did however take comfort knowing she had a group of good friends, many whom I had met before leaving Odessa. It was nice as I had gotten to know Anna in a much different light compared to my first visit to her in 2003.
  By 2005 I was introduced to more of her friends, and saw her in her own environment conversing without having to speak English to me, even though she spoke very good English. I saw her being herself, often she would stop and translate for me, and even felt that I must be bored as her friends don't speak English. But I was fine with it all, and I was just glad Anna could have some laughs and smile for a night, leaving the ex on the back burner for a few hours.
 
 Back in Dnepropetrovsk, after the guys were all gone things got very quiet. I no longer went to any agency's so I had no one to just talk with outside of Katya. I also reflected on my crazy four month holiday, had a few hard looks at the bank account and evaluated my relationship with Katya. I even pondered when would I have to leave. At the same time I was kicking myself for being so down over Olya, the girl that got me on the plane way back in August.
I also thought about the weeks I wasted not searching full time for a girl, and really just being lazy with the comforts that Odessa provided me. Living with Guy, having Anna there, and English was never far from being spoken. I would even meet up with Matt from time to time, but now it was all gone, and it was Katya, and only Katya. Not that it was a bad thing, wanting to find a girl is why I flew over here, but shit after fifteen weeks I was getting tired of the country. No girl was going to keep me longer than I could handle, but the isolation one can feel had worn me out. Over the months I did learn some Russian, I could navigate around at a very basic level. But for TV all I had was the BBC and Deutsche Welle out of Germany. Both are good channels but after an hour it just repeats. Wondering around on the streets I was basically like a three year old toddler, and that too was getting the better of me. All I had to look forward to was waiting for Katya to come home from work, it made the gloomy cool days seem very long.
 
 Though once Katya was done with work we would meet up, and for one evening I had planned on cooking a nice dinner. She was into it and this gave me a chance to burn up the day getting the foods that I would need. First stop was the large market at the far end of Karl Marx, I'd take the tram for some of the way, stopping at McDonald's for a small brunch before walking to the market.
 Once there I began looking for some beef to buy, I really didn't know if it was completely safe to do so but the place was already hovering around 10c so the meats wouldn't be spoiling too quickly. I make my way down one of the aisles where the chunks of meat are out on display, as I'm walking I'm wondering just how fresh these cuts of meat may be. Then in behind the display counters there lying in a pool of blood, was the cows head, yup it's fresh!
This market has none of that silly shrink wrapped foods, it was a about as raw as the slaughterhouse. So I bought a chunk, maybe 2kg's and paid a small amount for it. And I wondered why I wasn't eating like a Lord for the past few weeks. At this point I was down almost 10kg's in body weight since leaving Canada, even with eating McD's 5 x a week. It's amazing what a couple hours a day of walking will do for ones health. After the meat buying, I'd always stop off at my friendly apricot salesman. Even though he couldn't speak much English, I was always greeted with a warm smile, and I guess buying a kilo of apricots off him didn't hurt. So I had the dinner all bought, meat, potatoes, rice and some vegetables for a stirfry. I even got some coffee and tea, not that I drink the stuff but I thought maybe she'd want some afterwards.
 
 The dinner went fine, I had a hard time keeping the food warm in the gas oven and it got slightly charred. Katya just kept that sly smile going, not wanting to comment on the dried out meat. It was more palatable with the wine, but even I was pissed at how it was a failure. No matter we head off to the living room and spend the evening talking. I knew this chick has seen her fair share of western men, and I knew that most of them would jump her if given the chance. So my strategy was to play it very cool, not get aroused and let her do all the talking. She'd drop little words here and there, trying to gauge my reaction, and I just held off saying much. You see I remember what she had told me weeks before, and from those conversations I decided I wasn't going to be the typical guy. But I guess after a couple of hours she finally dropped the bomb, She looks over with a smile and says, "You wanna fuck me baby?" I found this to be quite funny and simply grinned, thinking to myself she has pulled out all the stops, and has nothing left to get a rise out of me. She did spend the night, but we never had sex. It was difficult to keep calm, but I knew it would be for the betterment of our relationship. I have to say it wasn't easy, she wanted it, I knew that, but I knew it could be another night.

 In the morning she wanted coffee, and it was a stroke of genius that I picked up a small container of the stuff for this very reason. So I went about making my first ever cup of coffee.... it occurred to me I had no clue how to make it. Inside the jar the product was all crumbly and I wasn't sure if I needed a filter or if it was strained out afterwards.  But I knew enough to boil the water! After staring at the Russian label, because if you stare at a foreign language long enough it will all make sense... Feeling somewhat stupid at being 37yo and not knowing how to make coffee, I kept at it hoping the answer would come to me.
 After several minutes Katya comes around the corner and wonders what the hell I am doing. I have no defence, I look at her with a biwildered look and she takes the jar and dumps the stuff into the hot water. Gives it a stir and looks at me like I'm a retard.  Thank you for showing me, now enjoy the coffee dahlink.
 
 As the following days went by Katya and I became closer, it all seemed very normal. There was no countdown calendar for a departure. No race to get laid before having to head home, just a normal pace that a relationship takes. Things with Katya were getting to the point that I felt we could be apart, and I would return to see her in three or four months time. 
It was during the last week of my trip that she told me her brother was coming to visit her from Russia. She hadn't seen him in a few years and I was thinking maybe this is a good time to go home. Let her visit with family and pick it up in the springtime. A few days after she told me about the brother's visit, I made my mind up that I would fly home. Katya and I were at a point that I felt we had enough to continue without too many problems from being apart.  I also considered heading to Odessa for the week, and coming back to see her, but my decision came very quickly while out walking during the afternoon. That night I told her I needed to book a ticket, and the following day with her help I had my ticket to leave the next day.
 Katya wanted to know when I would come back, and understood why I had to go. Fifteen weeks with no income was kind of nuts, and if I wanted to return I needed to earn some money badly. I paid up the landlady and spent the final night at Katya's, it was good, it felt comforting, and some what of a relief I wasn't coming home with no girlfriend to show for me weeks abroad. We said our goodbyes and I flew to Kiev. From there I called up Guy and told him I was leaving, I also called Anna and wished her the best. Telling her I don't know when I may come back but that we will stay in touch.

 As I made my way to the passport control, the officer takes my passport, has a look at my arrival date, and does some quick math...  "Where is your visa for staying more than 90 days?" he asks. It was at this point where I knew I should not have trusted Guy weeks before by telling me he was the, 'Warden of Odessa'!
Like WTF is that anyway you ask? Well according to him, he was given some powers by the Canadian Embassy in Kyiv to help Canadian's in Odessa. I guess in his mind he was running a consulate, albeit it now appeared to be a faux consulate. Guy told me a very convincing story, and I had no reason to really doubt the man as he had always been honest in the past. As well I was with him the night he emailed the Embassy in Kyiv with my information regarding the extended stay.
A few taps on the keypad one night at his place, and he proudly said it was all taken care of. However I guess the "paperwork" never got into the Ukrainian government's data base, and when I told the officer that the 'Warden' had sent it via email, and that I never got any papers from him...and... and... He doesn't look very impressed with my answers, he annoyingly stamps the passport allowing me to get out of the country. I was fifteen days over due on the ninety day limit.

 After I cleared the gate I called up Karina from Zaporozhye, she's the one with an agency. I tell her I may of found the one, and she is happy for me and wishes me all the best. I have nothing but good things to say about her. She helped me out so much with setting up dates, that I have always recommended her to others. I followed it up with a little talk with Katya and soon I was off to the 1st world!

I got a flight on Aerosvit Airlines, it was my first time with them, and well... it was entertaining! First the TV didn't work so the steward walks up to it and begins smacking it! I began thinking if the bird was as sound as it should be.
 Touching down in Germany was like stepping into a different world, I honestly had some slight culture shock. There were girls all dressed so different, and much larger than you see in Ukraine. The place was clean and orderly. People smiled and their were lots of items for sale in the stores, and even some very familiar American restaurants. But the girls were gone, no slim skirted thigh high stiletto boot wearing girls. Just plainly dressed girls, not showing much sexuality at all. I was shocked at how much difference there was after four months of seeing girls who put a lot of time and effort into looking well dressed. The fashion show was over. I had just stepped into a bad time warp...

[Donhollio]

   Touching down in Toronto after four months of being out of Canada was a great feeling! I had lots to reflect on during my flight over the Atlantic, and while waiting for the departure in Kyiv's airport. For one I was so happy to be a Canadian, I now knew completely how privileged I was to hold this citizenship. And with all the domestic problems that Canada may have, it can pale by comparison to the issues that Ukraine has.
Legal, social, political, healthcare and corruption, are but a few problems that both countries have to some extent, but Canada's woes fall far behind those in Ukraine. 
 The lack of an effective social net in Ukraine is one of the most troubling for me. Old age pensions are so meager that many widows must seek out some form of work to help them survive monthly. One night while out walking with Katya I was asking her what kind of work could I possibly do if I was to stay here. I told her teaching was out, and that would leave me with sweeping the streets like so many seniors do during the overnight shift. Not very appealing to me, and then she told me they earn only about $40 per month. So with the pension and sweeping duties many are making $100 a month to live on.
 I know of two pensioners one who makes $40 p/m and the other earns $200 p/m. It's no suprise some of them team up to live together, just to make ends meet.

  And after seeing my little orphan friend in Odessa, I can only think about his very dismal future. Most wind up on drugs in later years and end up in jail. He was a boy about ten years old, dirty hands, not the cleanest of clothes, when Rob and I first met him. He was wanting some money and instead Rob offered to buy him some food, he accepted and we had some McDonald's. Rob asked some questions and he did his best to say he had no parents, but lived in a home, we assumed it was a orphanage or something similar.
 After he finished his food he sat calmly, but we knew he wanted to leave, and Rob said he can go. It wouldn't be the last I saw of the boy.

 And again I reflected on how easy we have it here, we can bitch about taxes up our asses, government stupidity in it's finest form, a judicial system that needs attention but is somewhat effective. At least it doesn't have lawyers, cops, and judges all on the take, willing to turn a case around if you have enough money to pay the ranks off. I was told in 2003 that you could bribe your way out of a murder charge for $10 000. It just goes to show what real poverty is, and how we in the west have such a hard time understanding why such things happen. You can be poor in Canada living on welfare and still be light years ahead of the poor in Ukraine. Anyway...
 
  I continued to keep in contact with Anna from Odessa. I just wanted to be a good friend to someone who needed support in a difficult time of her life. I also did my best to keep sexy Sveta's (SS) attention who I craved to be around ever since that night at Guy's house in the yard. On the night of the Kristina blowout at Yo Club, SS was there and looking damn good. She was off in a area away from the group with a friend of hers, and I wanted to make it known I was wanting to see her again Made all the easier now that Kristina was not with me.
  So over I went hoping that there would be no phone calls or SMS coming from Kristina while I was talking to SS. While I was talking with her she seemed to stop short of asking if we could meet again before I left. I could see her wanting to say something but really enjoyed seeing her all nervous. Then with an elbow delivered by her friend Niome to her backside, that was hard enough causing her to sway forward, she finally coughed it up and I of course agreed.
 But Sveta is an interesting character, I tried on a few occasions but something always kept her from making the date, so I gave up. I called her the night before I left for Dnepropetrovsk, told her I was leaving and wished I had the opportunity to take her out for that drink we agreed upon. She seemed sad I was moving on, but hey I can't wait weeks for a night out. After so many weeks in Ukraine I had Begun to over think the way I had attempted to get girls. You'd think one would make the most of the dating pool, but it became apparent that I was too nonchalant. It needed to change and I will have to chase the girls I thought to myself.

 More on SS later...
 
 Back home I'm getting things organised, calling up friends & clients and seeing if I have any business left. As strange as it may seem things were pretty much normal upon my return. I had some clients get others to fill the void, and some waited until I got home to begin on their projects. Katya was on my mind and I would call her and we'd discuss what the future may hold. As time slipped by she seemed somewhat different, the phone calls were beginning to seem awkward. I soon found myself talking to a girl, instead of talking with a girl I knew. Maybe my earlier thoughts of having a stable relationship in it's early stages was premature, or she wasn't as committed to continuing this as much as we thought. At any rate the calls to her diminished, nothing was said to end it, but it just fizzled to nothing. It was alittle troubling, I spent four months in that country, gave it a half ass attempt, and thought I had a girl at the end of four months. Well it was four months with nothing to show after all.
 
 During this down time Sveta and I would send emails, and Niome once again set her up on a MSN chat account. This was a first for me having a live IM chat with a FSU girl, and Sveta seemed to be dialled in to all of it. The hours she spent on MSN with me instead of doing her job was quite amusing. Having met Sveta before in a social setting and at the school was a welcome relief from those Odessa agency girls, who for the most part were a complete waste of my time. With phone calls, SMS, emails and MSN IM chat, it wasn't long before I was thinking about getting back on the planes to Odessa to see if sexy Sveta could be the one.
  All the while I am thinking maybe I should have shown some patience back in the autumn, and seen if I had a shot at dating Sveta... it would of been nice... I was already there... could of saved a few thousand dollars... jet lag... hours spent on the PC... arranging flights...ughhh!
   So armed with a bounty of air travel points I begin my flight itinerary. Calling the booking centre I get my departure flight locked in, now the booking agent is trying to get me back in 3 weeks time, during the summer seats are scarce. Nothing in 3 weeks, moving along she finds the month of July sold out. Hmm, I'm thinking at best this is now a 5 week vacation, and as time slipped by, so did my return date. 6..7..8..9 weeks.
I'm having doubts about this point system plan. They make it sound so nice and easy, yet it isn't working the way I thought it should. Finally after about 45 minutes she has it all figured out, depart late June, return early September. Ten weeks I ask her is the shortest time span?  "Yes many people book these seats almost a year in advance."
Wow, who the hell can plan like that I thought to myself. And without thinking of any consequences I booked my return to Ukraine.
My friends are now thinking I am nuts, I quietly was beginning to think I was too, it felt like I had just left there, but there was a girl to be pursued, and I wasn't going to find out unless I took another chance at heading off to meet her. My pal Andre in Toronto couldn't believe I would leave when I was with Katya after seeing her photo's....I kinda agreed with him. But you spend 15 weeks in Ukraine and tell me how you're doing! I may have made it if they had nachos for sale, but I never found any. And good pizza would of helped too! And a damn 7/11!
 
 So with my flight booked I let SS know I'm coming back! She's happy and than the news comes from her that she will be heading off to Russia to visit her Baba...
Sweet. Nothing like showing up hours before she departs to Chechnya. Then she goes on to tell me that a year before her mom went, a bus was shot up days earlier. I'm thinking why risk it?  But it's family, and I have lots to learn about the family bond. So I can only wish her a safe bus ride there and back.

[ML]

But I guess after a couple of hours she finally dropped the bomb, She looks over with a smile and says, "You wanna fuck me baby?" I found this to be quite funny and simply grinned, thinking to myself she has pulled out all the stops, and has nothing left to get a rise out of me. She did spend the night, but we never had sex. It was difficult to keep calm, but I knew it would be for the betterment of our relationship. I have to say it wasn't easy, she wanted it, I knew that, but I knew it could be another night.

To me, this is the same as Quantum Physics.

I don't understand either one.

[Donhollio]

    Trip #4 June-September 2006

  It took four different planes before I landed in Kyiv, and while at the airport I debated weather to take the slow train to Odessa and arrive in the morning, or take a flight and be there in one hour. At this point I was just wanting to stop moving and get to Odessa, so I took the flight. 447 UAH one way. While more than the train obviously, it was also far more convenient to simply walk over to the next terminal.
It's a lot less hassle entering Ukraine by rail than through Borispol. At most on the train in the three times I entered this way, the only question I was ever asked was how much money do I have on me. This time they wanted to know where I was staying, and with whom. All the while they log the info into the pc.
I didn't know the address of Guy's but knew the street, it seemed to be enough for him.  I went into the green zone where I was then asked how much money I was on me. I said maybe $50 CAD, and I was clear to go.

It's always so much 'fun' standing in line when in Ukraine, I had this one guy behind me breathing down my neck, literally! I'd inch up enough to get his bad breath off me, and he'd move in closing the gap. He would stand so close that I could feel the exhalation on my neck! All I could think was from previous trips that they like to take minding the gap to a new level and make it disappear! You just never know, someone may just wedge themselves between that 10cm gap...
 Personal space seems to be lost in that culture, and unless you are heel to toe, there's an opportunity for one to cut in front of you. It's highly annoying, but you either get in the game, or sit on the side waiting for you chance in line...it'll never happen, so you better get in the mosh pit!

So after 24h of planes and some much needed sleep, I called up Sveta in the morning. She was on the bus to the station enroute to Russia. I didn't want to try and see her before she went, due to my exhaustion, as I didn't want a repeat of last summer the "meeting Olya syndrome." Best to wait and have a clear head for the date, instead of looking into her eyes and not hearing a word due to pure exhaustion.
So that was Saturday morning. I took it easy that day just trying to get the body in sync with the 8+ hour time shift.

Saturday night rolls around and Guy is wanting to go to Arkadia, Odessa's summer nightclub district.
So Guy, myself and two couples went to PAGO. Even though I was in bad shape and desperately needed some proper rest, I knew this night was not to be missed. Guy also informed me we'd be with a married couple, two past students from his school. Guy taught them English and they later immigrated to Canada. It was interesting to meet Andrew and Tina, knowing that they lived in Canada but once called Odessa home. Tina's a gorgeous girl, and I was hoping she had a sister living in Odessa. No such luck, only a brother.

As the night wore on I did my best to stay awake and have a good time. But after the wee hours of the midnight hour passed I was becoming a zombie. I knew I should of stayed at Guys and slept, but there's always a desire to not miss out, and in reflection I was glad I was there. I met Andrew and Tina that night, and we have remained friends since. It wasn't long before the head was hitting the table, even with the pounding music. Surprisingly I had only a few beer, yet to anyone there they must of thought I was completely torqued!

For those of you who have never been to Arkadia I will describe it as a midway type of place with small restaurants, shops and some nightclubs done up in a unique style, that I suppose rivals places you'd see in Las Vegas. All this winds along a beach on the Black Sea. The clubs go until dawn, or until no one is left in the place. When it was time for Guy and myself to leave I told him I couldn't walk up the incline to the street where the taxi's are waiting. I tell him to get the rickshaw kid and he can take us up there. Guy returns from talking to him and says that it's 35 UAH, in a tone that stressed as being it's way too much, and it is. The ride was maybe 300 metres uphill, but it was worth it. I have taken gypsy rides from the centre to the outskirts on Fountanya for less, and that is about a 15-20 minute drive.