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Author Topic: Starting Over in 2018  (Read 498 times)

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Offline BoozeBaron

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Starting Over in 2018
« on: September 18, 2018, 04:07:04 PM »
Howdy all -

For those that know me, you know I tend to write fairly long questions and answers (so will try my best to keep this brief for once-yeah right) ... I also have a history here going back to 2004! Some things have been good - a few were not so good but have always landed on my feet - Yes, I've moaned and groaned allot on here at times, I've been chewed out and told off a million times... I do disappear for months (years?) at a time too... but I do kinda 'know' the game and agencies and girls and scams to watch out for etc etc etc (after 14 yrs, I won't claim to know 'everything', which is why I'm still filing this in the noobie section) b/c I've been out on Medical Leave having several spine and neck surgeries which then led to an 'incidental find' during a follow-up scan where they found a tumor on my adrenal glands - so been dealing with that this past year, along with a dodgy back - So obviously no time for 'romance' and actually after my last UA relationship of 19 months, I took a 'break' to kinda reassess if this was even for me or not?? and dated a couple of Brit and AW during that time till I got too sick to even go out locally... Once the surgeries started and then the tumor stuff hit-that was pretty much game over for me and had to pull the plug on anything in the romance dept.
So, that was then - this is now... I'm back on my feet. Or, I'm 98% back - but been away from all this for a total of 5 yrs now (2 yrs were my self-imposed 'reassess time' just to ponder my last relationship and where things went wrong, and then about 32 months of medical junk) which as just said, I've now turned the corner on 98% and think I'm ready to try again - We'll see?  ...
Now, whilst I didn't do anything in the romance dept during all that recovery time - I did have ALLOT of time to think about what I was gonna do once I was back on my feet... Which leads me to today and this post...
I've booked about 4 months overseas (UK/EU/IRE/FSU) and it's part biz - part pleasure ... as I need to close up shop in London that I couldn't do when I was in hospital in America... So have about 30 days there to meet with all my old vendors, clients, friends, banks and the ppl who hold our business leases to close things down permanently (we moved operations back to America after Brexit)- I saw that post and am steering 100 miles clear of that one!!! :)

Grrrr - I'm rambling already... So let me try and cut to the chase...
I'm booking 30 days in Ukraine - Still on the fence as to 'where' just yet?? as it'll be winter by then, and don't really want to do the big city thing simply b/c they've been over run these past 14 yrs ... I am a WOVO TYPE person, but given I leave in 3 1/2 weeks, plus the time in London, I really don't have allot of time to do the "internet introduction" thing like I'd normally do (I'm VERY selective and know exactly what I seek) - Seems NOW that THE issue is, 5 more years have ticked off the odometer of life - and am finding (harshly) that I've broken that magical ugly age barrier now - and the gals that I'd typically have no problem conversing with, now won't give me the time of day (I even went as far to click my 'YEAR" and set it back by 4 years which put me below that magic ugly number and the next day my inbox was overflowing and got swamped with chat requests... But I can't play it that way - Gotta be 100% honest.. - so switched it back - and sure enough the tumbleweeds and crickets immediately came rolling back in yet again ....
I've tried just about every method, agency, website, and words of advice given me both here and in the country I'm in at the time (UA/RU/CZ/POL) and met some fantastic women - and a few squirrely ones along the way too ... But back to the issues of today...
Obviously I'm going thru an 'attitude adjustment' with the added years. But on top of that, the sites I'd typically use (along with the few agencies I once trusted) have either shut down or closed their doors or the women on there - aren't there any longer??? (some of the larger sites, used to have hundreds, if not thousands of women online at any given time - yes some, if not most, may have been "Boris" - but still - they had activity going on 4-5 years ago... Today? Nada ... I even went to one of my old haunts, just to see I still had/have 241 'credits' (to chat, not PPL) yet there's only like 6 girls online and it's 10PM in UA?? Huh? (that's .50cents a 'credit' hanging out there unused) - So scratched that one off the list too... NEXT! :)

So - I went thru the 2017/2018 posts on here to see which sites the 'experienced guys' are recommending these days - and can't say that's changed any - and even a few of those are dead and gone too now... I just logged onto my EM account after a 6 yr absence (never liked that site from day 1 because the ratio was like 1000:1 men to women) and found 6 EOI and letters in my inbox - All weighed more than me and were also older than me - Yikes! - so the 'pool' is obviously allot shallower these days for the pickings given my age (and possibly the politics of Russia?) I haven't read that thread yet... but know there's no love loss in the U.K. when I left there with Putin having gassed a few civilians - and then Trump is a topic I'm not gonna talk about either... but am certain he's created some waves politically with UA/RU? (that's a sincere Q - I'm not looking for a debate nor am I trolling) ... but can only imagine....

So these sites and agencies and my age have all changed ... and now find myself literally back to Square 1 ... WHERE TO BEGIN?  Mamba? I get 45+ y.o. with kids or they're only looking for RU guys (sorry, but the last gal (AW) I dated here before going into hospital, was a Southwest Airline 'air hostess', age 34, with blazing red hair and legs that looked like the cover of the first CARS album for those that are children of the 80's :)  Yes, she was that hot - and we actually got along great for several months - but she works for I.C.E. and we had some disagreements over policy and 'beliefs' and in the end I pulled the plug... Much to her dismay... but such is life... I dunno... Probably my last shot at finding a good AW - but am pretty set in my ways these days and it just wasn't worth the fights and hassles (and they weren't even 'fights' - she has a "Driver A" personality - and I think that's what we bumped heads over the most - as I'm the same... Lock 2 analytical, sensitive ppl that are driven into a padded cell, throw away the key, and they'll probably kill each other before the days end :)
So, all that aside - I could use a little guidance here guys (and gals?) thought I saw a few RW lurking around recently? Either way - Need an online suggestion that nets results and not Boris or 'pay for a date when you arrive' type scenarios... Prefer to get away from Kiev and Odessa this time (this will be my 11th trip I think?) (and the prior 10 were all always to just meet ONE person) - Yes, I had a backup plan - but after watching "90 Day Fiancee" last night and that "2nd fiddle girl" Colombian gal being heart broke by being told the truth that all that he had done up to that point (travel, hotels, resorts, dinners, RING, etc) were NOT originally for her, and she rightfully kicked him to the curb (he's on his 3rd marriage I think? and "falls in love" WAY too fast) - but you know those reality shows - Only the train wrecks make for 'good TV' - but I digress...

I just treat ppl the way I wish to be treated (golden rule eh?) and so if I find out a gal has met 10-20 guys from America or Britain, I'll pass ... as I'm so tired of smoothing things over from the 'sex tourists' or insincere guys that blazed the trail to Ukraine before me... I'm not judging - I'm just sharing that some of us nice guys are left with clean up duty and am growing tired of it... Happens allot more with AW obviously b/c we date more (easily) here vs flying to Europe/FSU - but - I dunno... The other issue I've been pondering is a girls true intentions - Not even an honest agency owner who vets all her clients (both male and female) can truly know what's inside someone's heart (100%) so even that option isn't bullet proof ... but international dating and the language barrier + LDR's, make things tricky as it is... Then add in cultural differences and 'motives' and it's def a minefield if you don't watch your every step...
OK, I'll shuddup for now and land the plane and see what others think and say, if anything? I swear I'm not saying I have all the answers - In fact, I wouldn't be back here begging for help if I did - I'm just saying you can kinda fast forward over the 'don't send money / don't pay for letters' speeches - That much I do know... I need resources on the ground there as I'm flying in solo and am used to doing solo trips - but that's when I know I have someone special waiting on the other end at the airport.- This time, I don't even have that going - and I'm still licking my wounds a bit (both at the heart level and medically speaking) - Again, 98% recovered - But you'll not see me at any discos at 2AM this time.- Allot has changed for me and had to make a few lifestyle adjustments... Been a long road...

Oh, one last admission... I think before - gosh, going all the way back to my 1st Visa in 2003?? - I've never gone over 'lonely' and certainly was never 'desperate'... as I'm fine with where I am in life and who I am as a person/individual and what I've achieved etc etc etc - Except these past 22 months, I have started to get that feeling in the gut like "somethings missing here?" - plus the clock IS ticking... so that's why I booked this trip once I got clearance to fly... I am nowhere near 'desperate' - I could call up SW Air and go that route if all else fails - but as the saying goes, "I'd rather be single and happy, than married and miserable" - Well, I'm def SINGLE now - and do have a yearning to start a new serious relationship after 5 yrs (dating is one thing - being engaged, is another) so I'm not desperate - but with the holidays coming up and the clock ticking I figured it's time to saddle up and try to ride this horse one last time... If it doesn't pan out... Then I'll call it a day and see what America nets me ... So we'll see? Look forward to hearing your thoughts after all this time -

Thanks!!
BB :)
« Last Edit: September 18, 2018, 04:22:53 PM by BoozeBaron »
I'm American born, but work in London, Prague, and NZ... Currently back in the USA

Offline JayH

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #1 on: September 18, 2018, 05:22:15 PM »
BB- welcome back again !~

Hope your health issues are behind you.

You have made the observation above about change -- and that is  the point I want to make here today.
It is very different scene today compared to a decade ago --or even 5 years ago.
Too many guys here want to hand out specific advice that is well past it's used by date -- so in every case -- be cautious until you understand how current those guys are.
I see threads getting sidetracked all too often.

I note your age comment-and am guessing at your age. Basically I think you just read that right on. In UKR -- in theory your life expectancy is not great - so considered the dreaded word "old". That is an immense hurdle to jump over  if you are still  thinking 25 yo --or even a 35yo !
The key part is if you are healthy ,active,energised like a 40 yo -- then you can overcome anything ! On the other hand -- there are some very good looking 50 yo girls around. Moby here on the forum is involved with one-- he has posted photos and she has a great body that belies her 50ish years.
My Ukrainian ex's mother ( who was younger than me !!) looked more like a not much older sister than my ex and was an extraordinarily beautiful woman .
Personally - I don't feel or behave much different than when I was a 21 yo--  the problem is the mirror provides a dose of reality that makes me feel like crying!
That then becomes a major impediment that should be directing your search now.

I have a few ideas for you -- am I correct in saying you are not too fussed about the $ cost?


Not Ukraine -- but maybe worth a pm?
Moby had a thread somewhere on a couple of decent real life leads.

Also -
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=21302.msg493226#msg493226


« Last Edit: September 19, 2018, 03:35:58 AM by JayH »
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Offline BoozeBaron

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #2 on: September 19, 2018, 03:10:33 AM »
Hello Jay-
Thanks so VERY much for taking the time to properly digest my lengthy missive - I really appreciate it man... And the way you tell it back to me (along with your numerous observations) let's me know I've conveyed my points accurately to you and everyone here - (and that I'm not  the only one losing my mind over this age thing too!!) - But you've hit the nail squarely on the head bud in every aspect from what I've just read - and this is important for 2 reasons: #1) You definitely do 'get it' - I can clearly see that you understand and maybe relate to the pains I'm currently feeling and battling when I too look in the mirror these days... (hence my comment about having to make an attitude and expectation 'adjustment' deep inside) ... Pretty tough to do when you're used to having free run of the candy store these past 14 years now! :) But my search and ultimate quest has been, and still remains to find 'true love'... something I think that sadly is getting lost these days - because as we've both said, "times are indeed changing" - It only takes 10 mins on Instagram or FB or VK to see that the trust funder/oil kids are popping up all over Russia (and England / America) and so I'm hoping to kinda steer clear of that mess, and the big cities, and try the 'village' approach this time around, with the hopes of finding a gal that's still rooted in family, with good morals, values, and honors tradition...That's a BIG ASK I know... but think she could still be out there? - Won't know till I get there and try eh? I guess I'm basically doing a hard 'reboot' here, and hope to get things going again somewhere overseas if possible... So, fingers crossed, the path will be a clear one...
 Thankfully I was blessed/cursed with this darn 'baby face', and still have all my hair and living in London got me cutting it like all the footballers do ages ago before it ever caught on in the USA - So that gives me a tiny edge and takes a few yrs off my age - Plus it's only just now that I discovered I have a touch of grey that's starting to show that Redkin 'Camo' does a brilliant job of hiding (we're talking 15 strands so pls don't think I'm some comb-over dye job washed up nut case!) I'm just sharing a 'lil secret that my ex gave me as she worked at Toni & Guy in London and is impossible to tell and takes 10 yrs off me - so, that to helps explain why I'm still able to fish in the "30's waters", even here in the USA... (going to someplace public, you don't have to advertise your 'age' above your name like you do online with a 'profile' - So that's what allows me to open doors with the 30 something crowd and get my foot in no problem - Plus all my friends are all mid-30's early 40's and nobody opens with 'How old are you?" ya know? - But now, when you HAVE to post a hard figure and b-day on a website or agency profile page - Yeah, that's the first thing they see - Or worse, they only search from age "XYZ to XYZ" and I don't even make the cut! - So, I dunno guy? I am definitely open to any suggestions as to 'the new ways' and really do appreciate all your feedback on all that as well... I needed a reality check and someone to ping all this off of before venturing out - so your response was both very timely and insightful - not to mention everything said, was also 100% spot on  :clapping:
OK - Time to start wrapping things up - But if I read the tail-end of your post correctly, you mentioned something about a PM and me being open to other ideas outside of UA?? I'm def open to talking offline; either here or via phone sometime (I'm in CO/MST) We even used to have a RWD group of guys here that met up from time to time when Dan was around and more active etc., but again, that was like 2003/4/5 ?? ... over a decade ago now (yikes) and we can't live in the past, can we.... because 'yes', things have def changed!
That said, I do like dating more in Europe (UK/IRE/POL/FR/CZK, etc.) because they don't get as hung up on the whole age thing as much as AW do (obviously) - and up till 5 years ago, man, I felt like I was on top of the world and totally indestructible - 6 neuro surgeries and a bout with cancer later, all that has really put "life" into proper perspective for me now and what's truly important... Family, friends, my faith, relationships - All those are far more important than any job title, new car, big house, or bank account balance - And I think too, that's why my gut (or heart) are crying out so much right now, whereas before, I just took things for granted (and I'm not usually that thick or shallow - because I'm totally not as a person) but I guess that maybe I lived in denial somewhat, simply b/c I was so fortunate to be able to date several awesome young ladies who were in their 20's-30's that fell for me (and I for them) - Plus a 19 month broken engagement kinda stings too - but I took 2 things away from that experience - Now I def know what I seek and desire in a partner; and the whole "its better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all" is actually very true! Painful? Definitely - But I'm a better man now for having been thru all that and having such an amazing relationships... But, I digress...

All that said though - once your body betrays you and your health goes south (even for just 2-3 yrs) that really kicked me in the ass and made me realise what truly is important in life - On the other hand though, I started my last Post off by saying that I was out on medical leave - so for almost 3 yrs now, I've had to kinda limp along on savings and my 401(k) and any investments I've cashed out - Plus I sold my shares in a couple of my companies, so short term, I'm good - but long term, we'll see how that pans out, as by doing so, I've just cut off a couple of my primary revenue streams - But am in the process of rebuilding all that now, and think I'll be good for the next 20-30 yrs ... I'm fortunate though that from like 2011 thru 2015 were banner years for my companies and banked enough to last me probably till I'm pushing up daisies (you'd mentioned costs or finances?? - so that's my round about way of addressing that) Yeah, I can still afford to pack up and trek off to Europe for several months, but can't do it as much as I did before, as I do need to start watching expenses more closely now - Was allot easier when I was living in London, as I could grab a 99 flight and be in PRG or KBP within 2-3 hours ... Now? Now it's a 12 hour journey if I fly direct (1-stop) or 30+ hours if I have to change planes twice - All depends on work and where I end up after I wrap up things in London ... Anyway, the master of tangents just took a hard left there, and trailed down several rabbit holes  :TMI: - My apologies...
I think we were agreeing that getting older kinda sucks...so that's also the reason I wanted to draw a hard line between "urgency" (due to age and health) over pure "desperation", that I do see in others from time to time on here and on TV, which typically end with poor decisions being made or just flat out bad moves b/c your motivations are all wrong - Ironically though, I see it with both males and females alike - That's the only downside of dating someone 30-35ish is their internal body clock is working overtime (I'm speaking about AW/EW mostly now, as most UA/RU women are typically married off before they ever even hit 30) So, that's actually why I parted ways with the last gal I was dating in England who was 32 when we met and 36 by the time it ended ... but she couldn't get down the aisle fast enough and kids were her only concern - I felt like a bank, and sperm donor lol ;D - Kinda sucks the romance outta things, ya know? So all that to say - I have to watch that aspect too as I wade back into the dating pool here ... I've made note of your 40's & 50's comments - and will try to take that onboard more (again, all part of the 'adjustment' I'm going thru ATM) but don't thrash me too hard if I keep gunning for a 35 yr old :)

OK - I've def prattled on for long enough yet again - so will wrap for tonight - I did quickly look at the link you sent and Googled
Krasnoyarsk - Ironically, this (region) was on my list way back in the early days of my first search (2003) and have had many battles with agency mgr's and even women over the pros and cons of RU vs UA women - Again, I feel politics are now probably part of the picture too? As I have several "girl" (comma) "friends" from Russia on Twitter who all meet up whenever F1 racing is on over a weekend - and we'll all talk about various things and state of affairs etc - So I've had a few conversations now about the state of Russia these days with the USA etc - but point was, I've known these ppl for years now, but definitely sensing allot of 'distance' here as of late??? - and will chalk that up to the current administration - or that's my sense of things? - But all that aside, can I get a RU VISA within 3 1/2 weeks? I think it took a month last time even when I FedEx'd everything? So we'll see about that too? - I'd love to hear more about all that - esp if you have some internal working knowledge of the area/region or any contacts there that can assist? - I'm all ears! and look forward to discussing it more, if you're game?? - I couldn't tell if you were referring me off to someone else or offering to share some new info? - Either way, I'm def open to any and all suggestions... Fire away! and feel free to DM/PM me any time.
OK, once again, I appreciate your time and feedback and your willingness to help - it means allot - Plus I actually feel much better now getting all this off my chest  :D - Staring at a hospital ceiling (on and off) these past few years has pretty much done my head in - and within my social and work circles, there really aren't all that many people that I can discuss this topic with these days (they freak whenever I just go to England - You can only imagine the looks on their faces when I show them pix of UA and such!) - And forget 'family' (if you hadn't noticed my travel dates) - I intentionally booked outta here so I'd be overseas for both Thanksgiving and Christmas - as I actually have more friends over there that I'd rather hang with, than I do here for the holidays (plus they don't celebrate Thanksgiving obviously in ENG) :) I just picked up some sporting event tickets as I plan on going to the Jaguars game at Wembley, along with a Chelsea v Manchester match and if any Rugby is going on then, that'd be ace, as that's my first love :) - Then will be spending New Years Eve either in Paris under the tower or if I do manage to connect with someone nice, hopefully be spending time with them over the holidays... All TBD!! - I have 120 days to arrange things as I please - so - everything really just depends on how far I can get (making arrangements with someone) online upfront - and it now sounds like I should research the RU VISA option too and if I can flip that in time or not? (BTW, with Putin claiming Crimea back, do you need a visa to cross the border into Crimea now? I only ask b/c I have a few contacts in Crimea around Feodosiya, Simferopol and Alushta that may be helpful - but those are kinda "Plan Z" and a last resort) ... plus, it'll be the dead of winter then and it's not easy to travel Crimean then - but thought I'd ask since I have your ear here :)

I can't say "thanks" enough - But truly do need to wrap for now - Sincerely appreciate all your feedback and look forward to discussing your other ideas more too - Thanks Jay -
Cheers -

BB  8)
I'm American born, but work in London, Prague, and NZ... Currently back in the USA

Offline BoozeBaron

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2018, 03:32:54 AM »
PS: After Googling that, I found this article first (was looking for any agencies in the area) and this popped up - I guess geographically speaking, it makes sense...

http://siberiantimes.com/other/others/features/f0261-weve-come-for-your-women-chinese-men-seek-siberian-brides/
I'm American born, but work in London, Prague, and NZ... Currently back in the USA

Online SteveInBoston

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #4 on: September 19, 2018, 10:32:02 AM »
I was in a somewhat similar situation at the beginning of this year, but for me it was 10+ years of being single.  I was good health-wise but was very out of shape and feeling the clock.

So I got back into shape and tried a few sites, including a couple of ppc sites (Dreamsingles, Charmdate - stay away...).  The one that worked for me was dmnotify. 

Another decent one seemed to be RussianCupid and it's sister site UkraineDate.  I noticed some of the same women on both sites, so just pick one.  I guess UkraineDate if you don't get your visa in time.

All three of the above are pay once membership sites, I think $50-100 for 3 months, or $30 for 1 month?

I payed for 3 months and found my match (hopefully - things going great - fingers crossed), so I didn't have to renew. 

I am in my late 40's and contacted women between 30-45.  After a month I had regular communications with 4 women, 3 from Russia and 1 from Ukraine, aged 33 - 42. 

I got a 3 yr tourist visa for Russian and planned to visit Ms Tomsk, a 33 yr old single mother.  But after another month of daily communication I discovered there were some compatibility issues (no concerns with being scammed or insincerity - just differences in outlook) and cancelled that trip.  Then I made plans to visit Ms Ukraine, who was 39.  That trip took place and went much better than expected, and she is the one I am with now.

Good luck on your search and your trip(s). 

Offline ML

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #5 on: September 19, 2018, 02:27:05 PM »
Good news for OP is that the best sex partners are gals 35 to 50ish.

Can he attract and keep one of them?  Don't know.
Many of them will accept a 10-20 year age gap; but not all of them, so no guarantees.
A lot would depend on how the guy looked and acted in the physical sense.  i.e. Does he have a 'spring in his step' or sort of drags around.
His interest in and ability with sex will be important to many of the gals in this age range, but not all of them.
Money will be very important; even as most of the FSU gals don't really expect too much.
But, aside from just having another person to take care of as with a local wife, there are extra  tens of thousands of dollars required to get the foreign wife all the way from Fiancee visa through to USA citizenship.
The fees to USCIS really add up for the various stages, then there can be the schooling, cars, extra insurance, trips back home, etc.
This can easily be $10,000 for government fees, plus another $30-50,000 over 5-10 years for  the other items.
A huge difference money wise relates to the job skills of the woman.
If an accountant, college professor in a demand subject already possessing PhD (but not school teachers because the licensing requirements are a killer), laboratory technician, nurses aid, beauty salon gal, etc., can be found this will make tens of thousands of dollars difference compared to most who won't be able to provide any financial assistance to the family.
And, depending on what level of gal needed for your social life and day to day conversations, some of best can be the gals that are willing to and can work as cleaners.  Hard and fast workers in that area can pull in $40,000 plus per year; and some have been known to eventually have their own businesses employing other gals, and bring in $100,000 plus per year.
Futher note:  MDs, Registered Nurses, and school teachers are good choices . . . but only for the long run and if you have an extra $40-100,000 up front to get them through several years of re-certification.  Of course the divorce that could come just as their pay-off time arrives would be a killer.

If an older guy can pass the physical stamina and money tests that I refer to above; he will have great opportunity in FSU.  Not as much opportunity as guys 35-50, but still he can trade up compared to what he could attract in USA.

It is unlikely that a gal with the body of Moby's gal can be found in the 50+ range (she is a definite outlier); but there will be many that can beat 90% of the 50+ women in USA.

Just how to do this is a controversial subject here as in the WMVM vs WOVO scenarios.
However, if OP is going to be in FSU for a month of so, the WOVO alternative is out the window.

My advice:  Sign up for 5 or more of the dating websites that have monthly memberships for unlimited contact with all the gals.  Then, it will all depend on your writing ability, chit chat ability, and charm ability when you actually spend time with them.

Best of luck.
« Last Edit: September 19, 2018, 02:34:28 PM by ML »
I still like Ike.

Offline JayH

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #6 on: September 19, 2018, 05:24:17 PM »
We have some decent responses here ! :clapping:

Steve -- you make some really good points . I have to say this -- great that you got your act together and got fit & healthy -- these are things that should be prioritised in extreme serious way for guys that want to be "serious".  ML touches on some of the reasons in the next post ! :)
Also note -- being in your late 40's  is a prime time to be looking ( in my opinion)  and it should be all 100% upside --IF YOU ARE THE RIGHT GUY !
It is also fairly different to the problem the OP is facing right now.

BTW was Tomsk girl a Juliya?


ML --  covers many good points --

--Good news for OP is that the best sex partners are gals 35 to 50ish.

Can he attract and keep one of them?  Don't know.
Many of them will accept a 10-20 year age gap; but not all of them, so no guarantees.
A lot would depend on how the guy looked and acted in the physical sense.  i.e. Does he have a 'spring in his step' or sort of drags around.
His interest in and ability with sex will be important to many of the gals in this age range, but not all of them.
Money will be very important; even as most of the FSU gals don't really expect too much.



If an older guy can pass the physical stamina and money tests that I refer to above; he will have great opportunity in FSU.  Not as much opportunity as guys 35-50, but still he can trade up compared to what he could attract in USA.

It is unlikely that a gal with the body of Moby's gal can be found in the 50+ range (she is a definite outlier); but there will be many that can beat 90% of the 50+ women in USA.


Some of the points made support my earlier comments .
There are some very very good looking women over 35 yo -- even at 50 yo-- I think about 10% are still pretty damn good !

  ML touches on the  money issue -- without telling tales out of school -- this OP is no Trenchcoat -- he has the resources to do this properly -- and  will  be able to satisfy the FSUW financial hurdle --plus -- has has the resources and  time to do it properly.So --he is not theorising here-he is looking for help in the ways and means to actually do  this.


SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Offline SANDRO43

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #7 on: September 19, 2018, 07:26:52 PM »
Another decent one seemed to be RussianCupid and it's sister site UkraineDate.  I noticed some of the same women on both sites, so just pick one. I guess UkraineDate if you don't get your visa in time. All three of the above are pay once membership sites, I think $50-100 for 3 months, or $30 for 1 month?
No need to pay immediately at UkraineDate, it's free to join ;).

This will allow you to browse the profiles of women there and gauge its potential. Also to evaluate the site: if as a free member you are daily deluged with letters - which you'll have to pay in order to read - it might be better to look elsewhere ::).
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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #8 on: September 19, 2018, 07:57:53 PM »

Welcome back BoozeBaron. You say you're WOVO but you're also extremely picky. Why not date many women? Greater chance you'll find that gem out of a bunch than out of one.
Give a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #9 on: September 20, 2018, 04:34:14 AM »
No need to pay immediately at UkraineDate, it's free to join ;).

This will allow you to browse the profiles of women there and gauge its potential. Also to evaluate the site: if as a free member you are daily deluged with letters - which you'll have to pay in order to read - it might be better to look elsewhere ::).

Unless it has changed it is free to read any letters sent to you, and free to respond, but you have to pay for membership to be able to initiate contact, other than "liking" someone.


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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #10 on: September 20, 2018, 09:35:22 AM »
Unless it has changed it is free to read any letters sent to you, and free to respond, but you have to pay for membership to be able to initiate contact, other than "liking" someone.
No you can look at profiles, send "likes" and such, but not read any letters sent to you and the ladies can't read yours, you can however send them letters but they appears as blurred for the receiver.

One part must be a paying member to be able to read the letters- there is actually a selection of few ladies that are paying members also.


Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #11 on: September 20, 2018, 10:07:25 AM »

It is unlikely that a gal with the body of Moby's gal can be found in the 50+ range (she is a definite outlier); but there will be many that can beat 90% of the 50+ women in USA.

@ ML - you just have to be patient and know where to look ..;)

I know 3 ladies in their fifties who are 'outliers' and one in their 50th year who I have dated / tried to date  ..ALL are still single AFAIK...!

A total waste ..

For defo, two of 'em have had b/f's who were twenty plus years younger and dumped them ..  they all work out and aren't muscle-bound - which is a huge turn off to this poster, anyway

THIS lady is FIFTY-FOUR years old..   

« Last Edit: September 20, 2018, 10:13:53 AM by msmob »
The internet, in the end, was not designed to give people the information they need. It gives people the information they want.

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #12 on: September 21, 2018, 12:21:29 AM »
Experiences will differ based on age, looks, financial status, language ability, personality, partner preferences, relationship history/status/kids, marketing ability (profile, comms) etc. So my reflections will not reflect the experience of others. I have made several trips to the FSU for business and personal reasons this year with (plenty of) dating on the side. I don't have a nervous twang for marriage but keeping the door open for meeting that special devushka. One could say I am offering a test drive for those who do not suffer from motion sickness!

On websites/apps,

Internet dating sucks. Really sucks. Did I say it sucks? well yeah, it sucks. If you live in country things may suck slightly less, but don't bet on it. Had more bang for buck going to nightspots and in daily life. I've tried more sites/apps than you can poke a stick at. There is no secret oasis but at the same time there can be one or two girls on almost any site where there is mutual interest. That special girl could have signed up to any site, needles and haystacks. If I had to recommend a top three:

Elena's Models - Not a huge amount of mutual interest but seems to be the most reliable site. Just don't expect dozens upon dozens of women falling to their knees.

Badoo - It is essentially the Tinder of the FSU but better (Tinder is a time waster). A mixed bag but deep dating pool and has some interesting location-based features. Use paid services, they are not too expensive.

Russian Cupid - Not necessarily an advocate, lots of time wasters and scammers (easy to spot) but there are genuine women. It's more geared to FSUW looking for western men. Get a subscription; I think this is better than its sister site Ukraine Date even if you're in Ukraine.

I cannot echo strongly enough, there's no magical site. You could find your special woman on any site/app or come up completely empty. Even the ones I short-listed have plenty of very flaky girls.

On age difference,

Younger girls prefer maximum 3-5 years; around 30 it's closer to 5-10 years. As you get into older ages it can expand further. But it depends on the individual. Some regardless of age don't want a big gap, others have no problem with 15-20 year difference. I'm at an age where some women really like my age, others think I'm too old. It comes down to personal preferences.

On single mothers,

Little known fact that MILF is derived from the slavic word милфь. I get the impression that if you're in country it's like shooting fish in a barrel*, but few single mothers online were interested in me. But they do diverge in their 30s and many by late 30s are no longer in shape and look really old. Awful diet plus lack of winter exercise. Again, it comes down to individuals - but collectively much better than in the west.

*FSUM in their 40s are likely to be either a) married, b) chasing much younger women or not serious, c) in really bad shape, or d) alcoholics. So if you're not totally disgusting the 35+ age bracket is a massive dating pool.


A handy rule of thumb:
- A girl asks for your WhatsApp, she's probably wants to meet
- A girl gives you her WhatsApp after you ask, she maybe wants to meet
- A girl doesn't give you her WhatsApp after you ask, she's not interested

Try to get to instagram or WhatsApp/Viber quickly but build some rapport first. Two girls asked me for Facebook, many use VK (not so much in Ukraine) but don't use it as a primary communication tool. It's an Instagram/WhatsApp world these days not email - for older women they may still prefer email.

My impression is that the longer you can stay in country, your odds of finding a wife will rise exponentially. Youth is not so important but you do need good health/fitness, money and time. If you do then odds will rise. This is assuming you're not a donkey's ass; it doesn't hurt to have a donkey's schlong!

Offline msmob

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #13 on: September 21, 2018, 01:12:32 AM »
it doesn't hurt to have a donkey's schlong!

Not being THAT well blessed has never been an issue for me - nor do I have a tongue like Mr G Simmons,  from Kiss ;)

The internet, in the end, was not designed to give people the information they need. It gives people the information they want.

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #14 on: September 21, 2018, 09:55:41 PM »
Experiences will differ based on age, looks, financial status, language ability, personality, partner preferences, relationship history/status/kids, marketing ability (profile, comms) etc. So my reflections will not reflect the experience of others. I have made several trips to the FSU for business and personal reasons this year with (plenty of) dating on the side. I don't have a nervous twang for marriage but keeping the door open for meeting that special devushka. One could say I am offering a test drive for those who do not suffer from motion sickness!

On websites/apps,

Internet dating sucks. Really sucks. Did I say it sucks? well yeah, it sucks. If you live in country things may suck slightly less, but don't bet on it. Had more bang for buck going to nightspots and in daily life. I've tried more sites/apps than you can poke a stick at. There is no secret oasis but at the same time there can be one or two girls on almost any site where there is mutual interest. That special girl could have signed up to any site, needles and haystacks. If I had to recommend a top three:

Elena's Models - Not a huge amount of mutual interest but seems to be the most reliable site. Just don't expect dozens upon dozens of women falling to their knees.

Badoo - It is essentially the Tinder of the FSU but better (Tinder is a time waster). A mixed bag but deep dating pool and has some interesting location-based features. Use paid services, they are not too expensive.

Russian Cupid - Not necessarily an advocate, lots of time wasters and scammers (easy to spot) but there are genuine women. It's more geared to FSUW looking for western men. Get a subscription; I think this is better than its sister site Ukraine Date even if you're in Ukraine.

I cannot echo strongly enough, there's no magical site. You could find your special woman on any site/app or come up completely empty. Even the ones I short-listed have plenty of very flaky girls.

On age difference,

Younger girls prefer maximum 3-5 years; around 30 it's closer to 5-10 years. As you get into older ages it can expand further. But it depends on the individual. Some regardless of age don't want a big gap, others have no problem with 15-20 year difference. I'm at an age where some women really like my age, others think I'm too old. It comes down to personal preferences.

On single mothers,

Little known fact that MILF is derived from the slavic word милфь. I get the impression that if you're in country it's like shooting fish in a barrel*, but few single mothers online were interested in me. But they do diverge in their 30s and many by late 30s are no longer in shape and look really old. Awful diet plus lack of winter exercise. Again, it comes down to individuals - but collectively much better than in the west.

*FSUM in their 40s are likely to be either a) married, b) chasing much younger women or not serious, c) in really bad shape, or d) alcoholics. So if you're not totally disgusting the 35+ age bracket is a massive dating pool.


A handy rule of thumb:
- A girl asks for your WhatsApp, she's probably wants to meet
- A girl gives you her WhatsApp after you ask, she maybe wants to meet
- A girl doesn't give you her WhatsApp after you ask, she's not interested

Try to get to instagram or WhatsApp/Viber quickly but build some rapport first. Two girls asked me for Facebook, many use VK (not so much in Ukraine) but don't use it as a primary communication tool. It's an Instagram/WhatsApp world these days not email - for older women they may still prefer email.

My impression is that the longer you can stay in country, your odds of finding a wife will rise exponentially. Youth is not so important but you do need good health/fitness, money and time. If you do then odds will rise. This is assuming you're not a donkey's ass; it doesn't hurt to have a donkey's schlong!

RWD, please put the appropriate parts of your excellent post over in the Pursuing FSUW 101 thread.

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0
I still like Ike.

 

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