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Author Topic: Russia US embassy Interview  (Read 2107 times)

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Offline Mandalay

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Russia US embassy Interview
« on: January 22, 2019, 11:21:19 PM »
Hello,

I wanted to get some insight about how to answer this question about travelling alone.

I met a Russian lady online and she is still married unhappily as well as her husband.  The marriage relationship is non existent.  They just never pursued divorce paperwork.
Along with that he is abusive mentally and physically.

We video chat daily and sometimes i can hear him yelling at her, calling her names and degrading her while we are talking.
He has multiple women, even brought them home and tells her not to leave the room.  Its a horrible situation and he is aware about me.

Her and I became very close and always talk about being together. I am in California.  We have lots of feelings invested and discussed so many things.

She applied for a tourist visa and her interview is within a couple days.

We know the question will arise if your travelling alone.

She is travelling alone and they will wonder why without the husband I assume.

She doesent know how the best way to answer this question and doesent want to ruin the chances on this question.

Does anyone have any suggestions they can help with?

I appreciate any help.

Thank you

Online msmob

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2019, 03:04:44 AM »
Welcome to the forum, Mandalay

Sorry, cannot help - as not a US citizen and no expertise of visa interviews


The situation seems bizarre - in that the stereotypical control freak I see in the cinema would not entertain 'his lady' taking to another man ...  whilst 'entertaining '

I  have a question for you ... Has she ever hinted at the help you sending her money would be ?



Offline Mandalay

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2019, 05:17:51 AM »
Thanks for the reply.  Nothing about money or hinting about needing money.  She does have the stereotypical guy unfortunately.  She cant do much about the abuse other than just going through a divorce through the court system.

Laws have changed i have read the police do not involve themselves in domestic disputes. A husband can bruise the wife and only get 15 days in jail or fined.  Often the agressor makes her pay for it as well. 


Offline BC

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2019, 06:02:42 AM »
If she is applying for a tourist visa, she should know what attractions she will visit.

Is she an artist?  Always dreamed of visiting a museum .... and be able to give a few names and talk up artsy stuff.
Does she have some hobby? There is an exhibit I really, really want to see... and show the advertisement
Is there some business interest?  Conventions are always good...  Visiting suppliers of equipment for demos etc.

Bottom line, she has to have a good reason for the visit, along with the funds available to support the trip. Bank statements, credit card statements etc..  Tourist medical insurance plan is also good.

And finally, a compelling reason to return - family, job, home etc

Part of an organized group tour?  That's ok too.

No job, no money, weak itinerary and few reasons to return - all red flags.


Offline BdHvA

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #4 on: January 23, 2019, 08:26:59 AM »
Manadaly, In your situation I would take a long hard look at what you are doing. If you can not see your own red flags get a second opinion from a trustworthy friend who will not sugar coat his thinking.

From what I read you are suffering from 'white knight syndrome'. While the woman's situation is not pretty, you are thinking that you can save this woman from her terrible fate. For a woman or man in the fSU it is relatively easy to obtain a divorce. If you want a fixer upper there plenty closer to home.

I will assume you have not sent her any money nor has she asked for any money. A question not asked are there any children involved?

What I would do if possible is meet in a neutral European country. For a Russian, Greece is a relatively easy country to obtain a Schengen visa. See if there is more than the dynamics of the abuser tying you together. To me the idea to come to America first is almost weird. If she is rejected the first time it become MUCH more difficult a second time to obtain an American visa.
Experierence is not what happens to you. It is what you do with what happens to you. A. Huxley

Online msmob

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #5 on: January 23, 2019, 08:32:09 AM »
BdHvA

1/ I mentioned the sending money issue, already - the OP has responded

2/ CYPRUS is even easier for RU nationals as they get a Provisional Visa decision in minutes and fly ..


Offline GQBlues

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #6 on: January 23, 2019, 09:55:49 AM »
Hello,<snip>

Holy Smokes!

Tell her to tell the consulate the truth. Here's a good example:

" I'd like to visit California because I told a man I do not know that I have a pretty f@Ck#d up marriage and my husband abusing me in every possible ways. Every time we talked since we met online, I pumped him up with all my sad stories to get to the point he now feels guilt and obligation to rescue me off my misery. I know he should be minding his own business, but I think he's a very lonely man in his town, so I would at least like to bring cheers into his life and give him an opportunity to romance and have plenty of sex with a married woman. Maybe have sex 3 times a day, or even more. I'd like to love him long time for being my prince. I tell him , I kiss you, Jimmy! every time....

Besides, if he came to see me in Russia, he would have to move here to make that trip mean anything with significance. He'd need to go back again and we'll be where we're at today. Which is why we thought that if I came to him in sunny California instead, we can shack-up as much as we'd like then when it's time for me to go back - what is it, 3 months? - I'd have the option of staying here and ditching my visa and we can live happily in shadows forever. Hopefully, the next president will be Democrats and they love illegal aliens.

Of course, unless he starts beating me up, too, then I would have to look for a man maybe in Spain who'd feel sorry for me. I wouldn't mind starting over again.
"

That should work, I think.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 09:58:10 AM by GQBlues »
~Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people~ Gator :P

Offline ML

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #7 on: January 23, 2019, 10:51:54 AM »
Hey GQ, quit trying to shed realism on these romantic stories !!  :-))

If you succeed in waking this guy up . . . then you will also ruin a potentially great soap opera series.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 10:55:24 AM by ML »
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online jone

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #8 on: January 23, 2019, 10:53:41 AM »
Thanks for the reply.  Nothing about money or hinting about needing money.  She does have the stereotypical guy unfortunately.  She cant do much about the abuse other than just going through a divorce through the court system.

Laws have changed i have read the police do not involve themselves in domestic disputes. A husband can bruise the wife and only get 15 days in jail or fined.  Often the agressor makes her pay for it as well.

Please,

Disregard the response from GQBlues.   

The simple fact is that she can say she is visiting friends/relatives.  Can even give your name.   The visa will be evaluated based on her likelihood to return.   So the following should be in evidence:

1.  She should have family to return to.   If the visa desk knows that she is married then she will return to her husband.  (I know that she is attempting to leave her husband, but visa services would be more impressed if she had a husband to return to.)  Are there children involved?

2.  She should have sufficient funds.   Make sure she takes evidence of money in the bank.   

3.  She should also be able to point to a job that she needs to return to or she will lose out.

There are professionals in Russia who specialize in telling visa applicants what to say to have the greatest likelihood of receiving a visa.   Some of my friends have used these people with great success.

The one kernel you should be able to take from GQ's diatribe is that you need to realize that she is running away from something, not running to you.
Kissing girls is a goodness.  It beats the hell out of card games.  - Robert Heinlein

Offline ML

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #9 on: January 23, 2019, 10:54:33 AM »
Manadaly, In your situation I would take a long hard look at what you are doing. If you can not see your own red flags get a second opinion from a trustworthy friend who will not sugar coat his thinking.

From what I read you are suffering from 'white knight syndrome'. While the woman's situation is not pretty, you are thinking that you can save this woman from her terrible fate. For a woman or man in the fSU it is relatively easy to obtain a divorce. If you want a fixer upper there plenty closer to home.

I will assume you have not sent her any money nor has she asked for any money. A question not asked are there any children involved?

What I would do if possible is meet in a neutral European country. For a Russian, Greece is a relatively easy country to obtain a Schengen visa. See if there is more than the dynamics of the abuser tying you together. To me the idea to come to America first is almost weird. If she is rejected the first time it become MUCH more difficult a second time to obtain an American visa.


Everything is well said.

But if you succeed in stopping this guy . . . then you will also ruin a potentially great soap opera series.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Offline GenMish

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #10 on: January 23, 2019, 10:56:43 AM »
A first time poster asking such a question? Is that a troll trying to get men to help another man get advice on how to cheat on her husband and make regulars look like hypocrites? (the subject has been coming up lately)

If a troll, I like GQs response.

If Mandalay is real, do yourself a favour and please DO NOT mess with a married woman

Offline ML

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #11 on: January 23, 2019, 10:57:21 AM »
Please,

Disregard the response from GQBlues.   

The simple fact is that she can say she is visiting friends/relatives.  Can even give your name.   The visa will be evaluated based on her likelihood to return.   So the following should be in evidence:

1.  She should have family to return to.   If the visa desk knows that she is married then she will return to her husband.  (I know that she is attempting to leave her husband, but visa services would be more impressed if she had a husband to return to.)  Are there children involved?

2.  She should have sufficient funds.   Make sure she takes evidence of money in the bank.   

3.  She should also be able to point to a job that she needs to return to or she will lose out.

There are professionals in Russia who specialize in telling visa applicants what to say to have the greatest likelihood of receiving a visa.   Some of my friends have used these people with great success.

The one kernel you should be able to take from GQ's diatribe is that you need to realize that she is running away from something, not running to you.

Thanks Jon.
You are using logic to help insure that my potential Soap Opera series may see the light of day.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Offline ML

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #12 on: January 23, 2019, 11:01:27 AM »
He has multiple women, even brought them home and tells her not to leave the room. 

This is a great tactic to achieve a ménage à trois.

The wife serves as the third person, which saves trouble of having to find another.

This husband could provide some valuable lessons here.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online jone

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2019, 11:06:04 AM »
ML,

Some of the best contributors to the forum over the years have started out in a train wreck.  Your soap opera could be letting this guy sort it out, winding up with about $25,000 less in his pocket, and then moving forward.

Who is to say that when this guy figures out that she's not in love with him, he'll wind up with a Russian woman that could actually be his love?   Batman went through a bunch of sh&t before he found his love.

But the question does remain about what is the most likely chance to get a visa to the US.  I attempted to answer that question without getting into the absurdity of the relationship.
Kissing girls is a goodness.  It beats the hell out of card games.  - Robert Heinlein

Offline ML

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2019, 11:12:15 AM »
ML,

Some of the best contributors to the forum over the years have started out in a train wreck.  Your soap opera could be letting this guy sort it out, winding up with about $25,000 less in his pocket, and then moving forward.

Who is to say that when this guy figures out that she's not in love with him, he'll wind up with a Russian woman that could actually be his love?   Batman went through a bunch of sh&t before he found his love.

But the question does remain about what is the most likely chance to get a visa to the US.  I attempted to answer that question without getting into the absurdity of the relationship.

Jon, yes I know you were trying to be helpful.  And good for you.
But I can't resist sometimes.

However, now that I am re-reading your above comments . . . wouldn't it be best if we could help such guys avoid wasting money and time . . . rather than condemning them to learn the hard and costly way?

i.e.  Don't give them advice on how to get the train wreck started.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #15 on: January 23, 2019, 11:31:02 AM »
Seriously folks...

Even if one makes an assumption that all that was written/stated to be true, where/how exactly does it help the woman alleviate her *life's misery* by *legally* obtaining a *tourist visa* knowing full well she'll need to return back to her miserable life and husband after 90 days. Think, think, think...hhmm?

"Instead, I come to you, Jimmy! Kiss, kiss..."

Big brother or not, one never knows when, how or whom those probing eyes are looking at to spot a proverbial accessory to a crime waiting to happen.
~Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people~ Gator :P

Offline Mandalay

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #16 on: January 23, 2019, 05:00:58 PM »
Thanks Jone for the answer.  I assumed her still being married will show about home ties.

I am a bit surprised about the jacked up responses I have gotten.  Honestly its my first post here I just registered. I guess it comes with the territory.

 I have corresponded to different women on one of the more reputable websites before choosing her.

Not many have a perfect life. I dont have a perfect life and just fed up with western females for my own reasons and what I have been through. Yes good ones exist in all countries as well as bad ones, our culture here in America has changed so much when it comes to men and women.

I have read about many red flags for sometime and bs and scammers on these sites of foreign women. Read through many things regarding a visa.

I chose to talk to her from the site. We text and video  She knows I am not wealthy.  She was on the site to hopefully find a better person in her life and being in the usa did not matter to her.  It couldnt of been any other country to her.

Her Ex she calls him has lived with other women and comes to her place to use from time to time.  I have heard first hand how he speaks and yells and demands.  This dude sits on his computer to play online games and tells her to wash his dishes or tells her to buy him food with her money otherwise he gets pissed.  He degrades her and laughs in the background.

I even seen him throw a jacket at her face when we were talking one night.  Everytime he is there it starts with him saying he hopes she stays miserable.

Im sure many Americans go through domestic bs as well.  It doesent mean she is a scammer or whatever.  She is kind like myself and we both relate about the struggles we have in life.

This has nothing to do with sex and just shacking up with a foreign chick.  People can do this in their own city or town etc.  I dont have any need for it and not into meaningless sex.

Im a bit off the subject here about the visa because describing some of the situation.

Really was looking for the best answer showing yes she has a husband even though neither of them want to be with each other. She is just something that is abused.

Question such as.. Example,  why isnt your husband going?
Answer:  Could not get time off work..
Question:  why not wait until he has time off??
She wants to travel with a female friend but i dont even know
If that even helps if friend has no Visa yet.   


She already has an itenary, for Hollywood LA travel
Hotel to stay at.
Which month she wants to travel for example March.
Home ties, documents, employer document etc..

I know we cant predict what they ask but I feel its a normal question..  just trying to make the best of the situation and answer since after tomorrow she has the Interview.

We want to meet in person for the first time it has gotten this far already and was just looking for help regarding the question.

Thanks again everyone.

Offline DaveNY

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #17 on: January 23, 2019, 05:06:49 PM »
Spouses traveling separately isn't unusual. Spouses may not be able to get time off together is a common reason for it happening. It could also be that spouses can't agree on a common destination so are traveling separately. It could also be a trial separation. There are any number of reasons for separate travel of spouses.

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #18 on: January 23, 2019, 05:23:57 PM »
Thanks Jone for the answer.  I assumed her still being married will show about home ties.

I am a bit surprised about the jacked up responses I have gotten.  Honestly its my first post here I just registered. I guess it comes with the territory.

 I have corresponded to different women on one of the more reputable websites before choosing her...

It wasn't jacked up. The situation you find yourself in, is. A married woman who listed herself in an agency for international marriage (did I get this part right?). If she gets the visa, came, then have to leave...what's the next move? If what you say that her hubby is as  much a scab as a Democrat, do you honestly believe he'll sign divorce papers that easily knowing she's hooking up with an American? What's her 'mama' going to do left in Russia with the dude if she ever arrived to you?

As for the interview, especially for a tourist visa, that is SOLELY in the consular officer's discretion relative to the applicant. They have a general template they follow with choice deviation according to specific cases.

I have NEVER seen or heard from Russians I know, have come to know, knew about - from my in-laws, relatives, to friends and associates of my wife - that had been turned down for a tourist visa since I've met my wife over 10 years ago. The past decade, we've hosted over 50 Russians of all ages who acquired tourist visas and not one of them suffered a rejection from the first time they applied. The majority of that group are my wife's friends and ex-classmates. In their 20s-30s single mostly females...some single, most married.

The 2 dollar question is - why not man-up and YOU go to see her instead if a temporary hook-up is all you two are after? If it ain't about 'sex', then I dunno what the hook-up will be for? C'mon, this may be the MOB-based site, but we ain't all missing a marble.
« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 05:30:29 PM by GQBlues »
~Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people~ Gator :P

Online SteveInBoston

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #19 on: January 23, 2019, 05:45:33 PM »
...

Not many have a perfect life. I dont have a perfect life and just fed up with western females for my own reasons and what I have been through. Yes good ones exist in all countries as well as bad ones, our culture here in America has changed so much when it comes to men and women.

...

I chose to talk to her from the site. We text and video  She knows I am not wealthy.  She was on the site to hopefully find a better person in her life and being in the usa did not matter to her.  It couldnt of been any other country to her.

...

This has nothing to do with sex and just shacking up with a foreign chick.  People can do this in their own city or town etc.  I dont have any need for it and not into meaningless sex.


Mandalay,

Be honest with yourself.  If she wasn't so attractive you wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole.  I mean, if she was dumpy or less than average looking you would see what a f'd up situation this is.

She looks like the attractive women you sometimes see who don't give you a second glance, but this woman, this attractive woman... you can be her hero and she will stay with you and be all yours.  For once a nice guy can get the hot girl...

So, with a messed up shite show that reality show producers drool over you are determined to get involved and maybe land a timid wife with low or no self-confidence and very little self-worth.  But she's pretty...


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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #20 on: January 23, 2019, 06:02:36 PM »
Just curious, you say all of these things he said in conversation while you were online with her.   Does he speak English to her?  Do you understand Russian?   Or is this her interpretation for you?

You could certainly make this easy for you to figure out if there is a match by getting on a plane and going to Russia (a helluva lot easier than her trying to get to the US).
Kissing girls is a goodness.  It beats the hell out of card games.  - Robert Heinlein

Offline Mandalay

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #21 on: January 23, 2019, 08:00:18 PM »

Thanks BC and DaveNy for the reply it helps.   

As far as beauty, sure she is beautiful to me.  I am a handsome guy with average body.  I did not purposely pick this lady because I really wanted to he a white knight.

I understand females can act very well and be fake and tell you things that you want to hear.  I just didnt pick any random woman based on nothing.  I had to correspond by letters ask many questions and see if we have anything in common.

I dont base it all on appearance.  She caught my eye and I started writing then texting and so forth.  We talk constantly and we get along very well so a visit is the plan to see how we are face to face.

As far as the the other guy, yes he shouts in Russian.  She interprets to me and I can tell its screwed up.  We talk about all kinds of things.  Its not like she calls and says poor me poor me and thats all its about. 

She is kind and humble.  She told me from the beggining about her situation.  I still wanted to find out about her personality and interests etc.

This isnt about manning up.  The situation is what it is. 
Not a hook up sex thing.  Im not a troll. I  had question and searched for a forum where I could maybe get help on a certain question scenario. 

I gave the situation to let others understand part of the scenario so she can have a better idea on how to best answer the question.

Thanks again everyone.

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #22 on: January 23, 2019, 08:09:06 PM »
Mandalay,

Good luck with your situation.  This place is more of an advice/trip experience/relationship experience sharing...um...place.

If you can, please keep us updated, whether she gets her visa and visits you or you make your way over there to see her, or something else.


Online krimster2

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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #23 on: January 23, 2019, 08:25:43 PM »
"Mandalay"

dude, you've got "IT" bad...
I feel sorry for what's about to happen to you...

(loud finger snap!) snap out of it man!!!

pretty much any story to the embassy is fine, husband's in wheel chair, can't travel, etc, but she has ticket, blah, blah, blah

you should do some splainin'  to us about WHY she is coming to you and not the other way around
or meet somewhere else like Ukraine, Turkey
how did it come to her coming to see you
you need to establish this in the plot early on...
and explain it to the reader


you got your place all tidied up, eh?
did you think about that????
instead of cleanin you coulda flown to Istanbul or Odessa...
now you have to wear a Mr Clean outfit!!!

next time y'all got an important decision to make regarding a Russian Woman , you ask your Uncle Krimster first, OK?
he will steer you the smart way, and NOT the way Russian woman says, OK? Russian woman way is smart for HER, but NOT smart for you...
you better learn at LEAST this part, don't AUTOMATICALLY do what she manipulates you into doing...
make your own decisions...

did you think what happens if there is no chemistry between you two or it just doesn't work for some reason
now you have a house guest you may no longer be so keen on
all the more reason for YOU to be over THERE, for YOU to be the one gets to travel instead of running a B&B for her

you're already starting out all wrong with her...
each mistake lessens your chances...




« Last Edit: January 23, 2019, 08:54:16 PM by krimster2 »
вы думаете, что любой из этих людей, даже российских, подозревает, что я русский?

вот как я могу создать американскую личность
Я могу взять напрокат

Offline Mandalay

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  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Looking 1-2 years
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Re: Russia US embassy Interview
« Reply #24 on: January 23, 2019, 08:49:50 PM »

For sure I will give an update positive or negative.

Thanks everyone.

 

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