"This is NOT a Numbers Game. It's a Soul Search!"

[Admin]

Oh boy, am I gonna take a ribbing over this.

I saw something on CNN which led me to Oprah.com (stop laughing - I really *DID* find it on CNN).

The theme of the article is something which is coming up here at RWD more and more - and I felt the article had some merit (even if it IS found on Oprah.com).

In summary, the theme is that the search for a life-partner begins with getting to know yourself. Figure out what makes you tick, what your core values are - and after that, then you are equipped to seek a compatible partner.

Anyway - here is the link to the article -- http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal/11/05/o.get.a.man/index.html

Enjoy!

- Dan

[Christian]

This is a very good point.  It reminds me of what John Calvin said: "Without a knowledge of self there can be no (true) knowledge of God."

Christian

[SANDRO43]

It reminds me of what John Calvin said...

Even before that,  the pronaos of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi was reported by Pausanias to bear the inscription Gnothi seauton, while the Romans used to say Nosce te ipsum, both translating to Know thyself.

[thedub]

In summary, the theme is that the search for a life-partner begins with getting to know yourself. Figure out what makes you tick, what your core values are - and after that, then you are equipped to seek a compatible partner.

I think the article is pretty much spot-on (for men and women. It seems to me if... (drum roll please and cheese alert)... It seems to me if life is a journey - then you want to know a good deal about yourself before you make the choice of who you're going to spend the rest of your life with. But it doesn't make sense to think you've gotta have it all figured out. Because you've gotta give yourself room to grow during the search as well. Not to mention having the foresight to be flexible and make concessions and change some things (or learn to accommodate) after the marriage.

Since lots of people are Bible thumping these days, I'd like to point out that my boy the Dalai Lama said something along the lines of... the single most important decision in anybody's life is who they choose for their life partner. Take your time to make the right decision.

[Shadow]

One of the greatest things about forums like these is that they can provide a mirror that shows who you are, not who you think you are.

I, like most people, do almost never like my pictures. There is a good reason for it. When you look in a mirror, people do not look at themselves, but at their self-image. In a mirror you think you look great, because you do not see what other people see.
When you see a picture, often the brain does not impose the self-image on it, you see what other people see.

The same goes for these forums. Many guys start posting from the idea that they know what makes them tick and that other guys will give them thumbs up for all of it. Then they discover that their ideas do not at all match those of the more experienced guys., and can be opposite to those of the women posting here. Scary, but at the same time it can help to correct the self image and understand how others see the attitude and ideas that a guy has.

[Christian]

Even before that,  the pronaos of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi was reported by Pausanias to bear the inscription Gnothi seauton, while the Romans used to say Nosce te ipsum, both translating to Know thyself.

Good quote(s), but neither pagan group got it right.  God had to reveal himself to set the record straight -  Mankind being still so self deluding etc.

Christian

[catzenmouse]

Can we please keep this from becoming a religious debate? There are plenty of sites out there just for those who wish to go that route.

[Christian]

Can we please keep this from becoming a religious debate? There are plenty of sites out there just for those who wish to go that route.

Dear catzenmouse,

Without being offensive and not trying to get your goat, I have in my brief time here noticed that you have an aversion to religious dialog.

Knowledge of God is found in everyman's conscience - whether acknowledged or suppressed.  God himself cannot deny himself.

If moral purity, integrity, and historical veracity annoy you then perhaps you need to rethink your own perspectives.

Finally, there is no society that has not recognized the existence of God - only those who oppose themselves lacking prudent reasonableness, e.g. the godless Soviets or the present President of Iran or Mel Gibson's dad denying the most well documented historical reality among mankind.

Christian

[groovlstk]

Dear catzenmouse,

Without being offensive and not trying to get your goat, I have in my brief time here noticed that you have an aversion to religious dialog.

Christian

This is a forum for discussing Russian women, not religion. Sometimes the two will interesect, but mostly not.

If moral purity, integrity, and historical veracity annoy you then perhaps you need to rethink your own perspectives.

My perspective on historical veracity could use some work, too. If you promise to debate religion somewhere else, I'll promise to work on my historical veracity, mmmkay?
 

[catzenmouse]

Christian,

 Not sure if that is your name or the badge you use to inject your belief system into almost every topic and as such you have shown an aversion to keeping religion and/or your belief system out of your posts here. This is not Russian Women & Christianity Topics Discussion web site.

 Perhaps you are new to forums in general so let me give you this little tidbit of information. The quickest way to kill a good topic is to add religion or politics into it.

 I am sure that are a few hundred, or more likely thousand, sites where you can go to have a rowsing religious debate. This is not one of them so in that light it would be greatly appreciated if you would please keep your religion to yourself. You don't see me injecting my devil worshiping, virgin sacrificing belief system into every thread now do you? Try to show the same courtesy.

Thanks much!

[KenC]

Any discussions here regarding religion or politics usually ends in a disaster.

[KenC]

Dan,
What next?  Dr. Phil?

I do take acception to the title here though.  I think it is all a numbers game after you know who you are.  I, like many , went through some deep introspection after my divorce.  I think I knew who I was within the confines of that marriage, but I was not necessarily happy with him.  So, I changed myself into who I really wanted to be.  Most of the changes were in the area of how I handled myself around women.  Being married at a young age, it was no surprise that at 42 I had to reinvent myself.  Through years of dating, my self esteem and confidence rose until I reached a level of comfort.  To "get" a good woman you have to believe you "deserve" one!  As young as Lena is, she put it all into perspective for me when she told me the she "knew her worth" and that she deserved a good man like me.
KenC

[I/O]

KenC: You and I agree on many things, but this is one area we have long sat on opposite sides of the fence so to say. I think what you did was very similar to myself in many ways post divorce.

In any marriage, who you are tends to dilute somewhat after a while and thats not all bad, until there is a breakup. In your own words, when you met Lena, you were NOT looking to get married, thus I question the "Dating Numbers" being part of a selection process, (I did similar, dated many but was not interested in getting married) but rather, was a tool to use in the rebuilding of self.

There maybe a fine line between the two, but nevertheless, I think that line very much exists. Certainly there is benefits in dating by numbers, but in this pursuit of/with Russian women, I don't necessarily think suggesting numbers is the way to go is sending altogether the right message to freshmen.

Soul search vs numbers? For me it was neither, but a soul whom I regard very highly did ultimately appear, so what was it? In heart of hearts, I was ultimately forced to admit to myself that I was very much open to if not actively seeking marriage or at least a life partner. Maybe you were too?

I/O

[Shadow]

Some prefer numbers (90-60-90) others prefer characters (DD).
Souls are harder to catch...especially on pictures.

[I/O]

Some prefer numbers (90-60-90) others prefer characters (DD).
Souls are harder to catch...especially on pictures.

Ah....!!! Now I get it. We speak about women "Of" numbers, silly me, I thought we were speaking about "Numbers" of women. Oh now I am totally confused. Good job I am past the search phase, I wouldn't know how to calculate the odds now.

I/O

[acrzybear]

I know I'm just an ignorant, knuckle dragging, woman beating, trailer park dweller-but isn't Christen violating the TOS?

 Rules of Conduct

You shall not post any message containing or otherwise use any obscene or offensive language or post anywhere else on or through the International Relations or affiliate site and services any material that is an invitation to fast money making schemes, defamatory, pornographic, racial, abusive or hateful, constitutes junk mail or unauthorized advertising, harassment, invades anyone's privacy, or encourages conduct that would constitute a criminal offense, give rise to civil liability, or otherwise violate any local, state, national, or international law or regulation. You agree to use the services offered by International Relations only for lawful purposes.

You agree to refrain from posting any ethnic, racial, religious, or political commentary which is not directly related to the theme of this site and/or which may be interpreted by others as being offensive or insulting.

But I guess there are different standards for others

[SANDRO43]

isn't Christen violating the TOS?

He isn't the only one, either. Good job, Inspector Bear, maybe Dan should give you a Moderator's Badge .

But I guess there are different standards for others

Maybe the recent allegations of newbie-bashing DV have prompted a more lenient approach . Should we have a poll to see if such sanctimonious posts should be tolerated at all ?

[acrzybear]

He isn't the only one, either. Good job, Inspector Bear, maybe Dan should give you a Moderator's Badge .Maybe the recent allegations of newbie-bashing DV have prompted a more lenient approach . Should we have a poll to see if such sanctimonious posts should be tolerated at all ?

Thanks, but no thanks-I do enough "Moderating" at work.  Also I can't send the people that pi$$ me off to jail

[Admin]

I know I'm just an ignorant, knuckle dragging, woman beating, trailer park dweller-but isn't Christen violating the TOS?

 Rules of Conduct

You shall not post any message containing or otherwise use any obscene or offensive language or post anywhere else on or through the International Relations or affiliate site and services any material that is an invitation to fast money making schemes, defamatory, pornographic, racial, abusive or hateful, constitutes junk mail or unauthorized advertising, harassment, invades anyone's privacy, or encourages conduct that would constitute a criminal offense, give rise to civil liability, or otherwise violate any local, state, national, or international law or regulation. You agree to use the services offered by International Relations only for lawful purposes.

You agree to refrain from posting any ethnic, racial, religious, or political commentary which is not directly related to the theme of this site and/or which may be interpreted by others as being offensive or insulting.

But I guess there are different standards for others

Post which are (using Sandro's terminology) sanctimonious in nature - or which are zealous - or which are proselytizing - all would be off limits.

It is a tough question. For example, my religious beliefs are a very large part of WHO I am. It would be difficult to address some topics without bringing those into the exchange. OTOH, if I begin to try to impose my beliefs on someone else - that would be, IMO, inappropriate.

Is someone trying to impose beliefs on others? If so, those should be addressed. Are they zealously promoting their views over others? That too, should probably be addressed.

The reason for the restriction expressed in the ToS is that we often see opposing religious views devolve into unproductive and highly-charged exchanges. So long as someone offers those beliefs for context and not to proselytize, they are probably OK - though, admittedly, some have a VERY thin tolerance for proselytizing and react vigorously to anyone even approaching that line. This whole topic is probably the most difficult to manage as there are no hard-and-fast, black-and-white lines to be drawn.

- Dan

[acrzybear]

Dan

Anyone who has been on this board for any amount of time knows that you have strong beliefs, however I have yet to see you post this many references to the bible (or God) in this short amount of time.  Perhaps it's just me, but this guy comes across as a religious zealot.  I'm no Einstein, but this looks like a clear violation of the TOS. But I'm just a guest and it's your board

Today at 13:56:17
Quote from: catzenmouse on Today at 10:59:38
Can we please keep this from becoming a religious debate? There are plenty of sites out there just for those who wish to go that route.


Dear catzenmouse,

Without being offensive and not trying to get your goat, I have in my brief time here noticed that you have an aversion to religious dialog.

Knowledge of God is found in everyman's conscience - whether acknowledged or suppressed. God himself cannot deny himself.

If moral purity, integrity, and historical veracity annoy you then perhaps you need to rethink your own perspectives.

Finally, there is no society that has not recognized the existence of God - only those who oppose themselves lacking prudent reasonableness, e.g. the godless Soviets or the present President of Iran or Mel Gibson's dad denying the most well documented historical reality among mankind.

Christian

Today at 12:43:00
Quote from: Mir on Today at 10:31:33
Yes all may not be wives but they were still women (who loved the men)

Also we see that the heroism was not restricted to Russian women but extended to women of other nationalaties, once again this shows that good and bad qualities exist everywhere.



I don't know where you got that from. Although Hindus have what they cal Sati in which the wives were burnt alive with the body of their husbands (it is now a banned custom) but there is no such custom ever practiced in an Islamic, Cristian or Jewish society anytime in the history.
Please provide reference of your statement.
Thanks

The bride of Christ as the human torches lighting the night up in Rome under Nero.

Christian[/i]

today at 08:45:56
Quote from: SANDRO43 on Yesterday at 20:17:30
Even before that, the pronaos of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi was reported by Pausanias to bear the inscription Gnothi seauton, while the Romans used to say Nosce te ipsum, both translating to Know thyself.

Good quote(s), but neither pagan group got it right. God had to reveal himself to set the record straight - Mankind being still so self deluding etc.
Christian

Today at 08:35:10
Quote from: gabaub on Yesterday at 15:26:22
Of course, Ukraine is no longer the breadbasket of Russia as it is not part of Russia.

And, let's not forget that my Ukrainians belong to the Ukrainian Greek Catholic Church which is not to be confused with the Ukrainian Orthodox Church.

As the fly sat on the axle tree of the chariot wheel and surmised "What a great dust I stir" (op cit Sir Francis Bacon) it is no little distinction between the two Ukrainian entities that you mention nor is there a little gulf between the one and the tendencies of Roman Catholicism and the MP.

Christian

Yesterday at 15:05:17
This is a very good point. It reminds me of what John Calvin said: "Without a knowledge of self there can be no (true) knowledge of God
Christian


November 04, 2007, 10:57:09
Greetings hprince and welcome!

Doubtless it will happen that you will hear that certain cities are notorious for scammers and what not. It all depends on the source of your info and the motives of the giver.

I remember such cities as Yekaterinburg, Lviv, Samara, Odessa, Zapolyarny, Perm - not to mention the God-forsaken regions east of the Urals. Some will surmise that the Slavs of Canada all worked in strip clubs and those who were in Israel or Turkey are victims of human trafficking and leftover meat.

Nevertheless, all these women need a stabilizing manly influence in their life (not to mention we guys vice a versa oh yeah). We are all looking to be redeemed.

Human beings are human beings. Don't believe me? A dictionary tells us all about ourselves and the Bible reveals what God requires in any human relationship.
The Ladies in Krasnodar are all "Bitches" - just let their ex's have an audience or a disgruntaled suitor who wasn't up to snuff. Damn! And I thought all she wanted was me in a thong - hairy chest and all. Gee. Go figure. It never dawned on me that she wanted me to pay attention to her and cause her to stand out among all the rest. Shucks! Darn it!

Christian

November 01, 2007, 13:07:53
While the Ten Commandments are a good advice indicator it should be remembered that some women get so many inquiries that in the initial stages of correspondence they in fact use "form" letters. Once the initial stage is past, however, specific answers to specific inquiries is a sure fire indicator to the sincerity of the lady.Christian

[BillyB]

Based on the last few posts I think Christian will get the hint to cool his jets. He's certainly not winning friends and influencing people. If that's his goal, he's failing and turning people off and away from his faith.

[Mir]

Any discussions here regarding religion or politics usually ends in a disaster

Looks like most discussions here(or anywhere) end in a disaster

[Mishenka]

I know I'm just an ignorant, knuckle dragging, woman beating, trailer park dweller-but isn't Christen violating the TOS?

 Rules of Conduct

You shall not post any message containing or otherwise use any obscene or offensive language or post anywhere else on or through the International Relations or affiliate site and services any material that is an invitation to fast money making schemes, defamatory, pornographic, racial, abusive or hateful, constitutes junk mail or unauthorized advertising, harassment, invades anyone's privacy, or encourages conduct that would constitute a criminal offense, give rise to civil liability, or otherwise violate any local, state, national, or international law or regulation. You agree to use the services offered by International Relations only for lawful purposes.

You agree to refrain from posting any ethnic, racial, religious, or political commentary which is not directly related to the theme of this site and/or which may be interpreted by others as being offensive or insulting.

But I guess there are different standards for others

You know, bear,, for once I have to agree with your "coffee and doughnuts" mentality.  TOS and ROC would have stronger effect sent in a PM to Christian.

However,  there is still a lot of room for "interpretation of others" as to what is "offensive or insulting"  Most of the posts in the forum lately were meant to insult one person or another. In that respect we have all violated ROC and none of us are innocent.

I agree some of Christians posts are "off the wall" confusing the issues at best. They are off topic and do not belong in this thread. To continue to answer his posts,  only inflates the issue by copy/paste and reposting it over and over again.  It amounts to beating the dead horse again.  Better to ignore in this case and not answer. Once ignored they will figure it out and move on. 

so with that said...

Has anyone other than KenC actually answered the original post. This one has the potential to get intereting.
Soul searching,, we need to know who we are and where we are going before we can lead others,, ie  new Russian wife and kids extended family.

Michael

[Mishenka]

In summary, the theme is that the search for a life-partner begins with getting to know yourself. Figure out what makes you tick, what your core values are - and after that, then you are equipped to seek a compatible partner.

Anyway - here is the link to the article -- http://www.cnn.com/2007/L...05/o.get.a.man/index.html
Enjoy!
- Dan

Curious if anyone has anything to add to this. Life experience anyone?

[acrzybear]

You know, bear,, for once I have to agree with your "coffee and doughnuts" mentality. 

 

Well I guess that mentality explains why I live in a van down by the river, drink beer and beat women.

I'm outta here