Beginner needs serious help on these marriage sites

[Simoni]

Who told you that? Many Russian men are known for their infidelities when married or sleeping around with as many women who'd have them when they're not married.

Billy,

I read "fooling around" as wasting time.  You read it as infidelity.

The latter part of Cher's post likey means you are correct.

Does not matter.  My answer remains as I posted above.  FSU women want to get married and start their family.

[chernoble]

Billy,

I read "fooling around" as wasting time.  You read it as infidelity.

The latter part of Cher's post likey means you are correct.

Does not matter.  My answer remains as I posted above.  FSU women want to get married and start their family.

Actually I mean both.  Many girls I have dealt with they play around with guy's feelings stringing you along pretending they like you but when you finally ask them seriously what they see in a future for the relationship they go "Sorry I have a BF" and say the classic "Good Luck" dump line which is like having salt in the eyes.

The point I'm making is I just think maybe FSU/Russian women will give guys like me a more serious evaluation and commitment IF they like me and feel comfortable with me.  The fact that I can't really think of that much good things I can offer to AW compared to RW (I'm not buying love but the better financial support is a plus to raising a family) and I just don't want to bother with AW anymore.  Its too much bad taste in my mouth from dealing with AW and even if it doesn't work out with RW I have a feeling that they can at least offer much better memories of happiness no matter how brief than the lifetime of garbage I had here (You have no idea how much I wish I grew up in another country sometimes.  America is like the land of ulcers and heart attacks not the heaven on earth some people think it is).  Besides I don't drink alcohol much less vodka, I don't smoke, and I do want a family so those are some big advantages I have over the local guys there 

[timothe]

timothe-
off topic, (but maybe not in the overall picture of things lol)

That *photo essay* by the girl riding fast on the deserted roads in the chernobyl area ,
was fake.While the photos where *real* enough ,
many where not taken in that area , and the ones that were , were not taken by some adventerous solo  girl riding a bike there,
 the story line was greatly exaggerated and not true.
Similar to a classic scam scenerio ? of some truth,, behind a tangled web of mostly untruths.
 There was a website detailing the actual events of where /how the photos were taken,
and it was actually far more detalied and a little chilling i believe.
*shrugs*

duly noted, AJ.  My memory of the photographs was from 5 years ago, but a short visit to Wikipedia pretty much wiped out any truth I remember from back then.  Wikipedia is awesome!

[chernoble]

Oh yeah what was this that Eduard told me that these dating sites are being used almost enitely by women of ulterior motives and ill repute.  He said I would be very unlikely to find a decent girl there but does this apply even to the "good" sites like Elena's M or bride.ru??

[MaxxumUSA]

Oh yeah what was this that Eduard told me that these dating sites are being used almost enitely by women of ulterior motives and ill repute.  He said I would be very unlikely to find a decent girl there but does this apply even to the "good" sites like Elena's M or bride.ru??

My woman's motive was to find a husband.  I think you will find thousands of women with this same motive.

I was going to respond to this thread earlier on but I started a new thread with the basics of my story.  You can view that here:

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=6439.0

Good luck in your search.

- Maxxum

[GoodBrew]

Actually I mean both.  Many girls I have dealt with they play around with guy's feelings stringing you along pretending they like you but when you finally ask them seriously what they see in a future for the relationship they go "Sorry I have a BF" and say the classic "Good Luck" dump line which is like having salt in the eyes.

The point I'm making is I just think maybe FSU/Russian women will give guys like me a more serious evaluation and commitment IF they like me and feel comfortable with me.  The fact that I can't really think of that much good things I can offer to AW compared to RW (I'm not buying love but the better financial support is a plus to raising a family) and I just don't want to bother with AW anymore.  Its too much bad taste in my mouth from dealing with AW and even if it doesn't work out with RW I have a feeling that they can at least offer much better memories of happiness no matter how brief than the lifetime of garbage I had here

This sort of negativity toward AW will not score you points with any prospects during your search.  You will be asked by your pen pals why you are searching for a lady overseas.  Better come up with an answer that does not belittle AW.  If you are perceived to be lacking confidence, you are going to have just as much trouble overseas.  Master your game with the local ladies before you get into this venture or your frustration will only get worse.

GB

 

[MaxxumUSA]

This sort of negativity toward AW will not score you points with any prospects during your search.  You will be asked by your pen pals why you are searching for a lady overseas.  Better come up with an answer that does not belittle AW.  If you are perceived to be lacking confidence, you are going to have just as much trouble overseas.  Master your game with the local ladies before you get into this venture or your frustration will only get worse.

GB

 

GB,

I agree negativity of any sort can be bad while visiting a RW in person...  BUT...  I also had a very bad taste in my mouth about AW compared to women abroad.  I have been burned by so many in one way or another.  This has nothing to do with my confidence.

FIRST - to find an AW that is not overweight is more and more difficult.  THEN - the AW that are thin have a hundred men hounding them because they're not fat.  Then the small majority of those thin women that are actually beautiful - well...  they are in control.  Complete control.  They have thousands of men drooling to have a chance to bed them, marry them, etc.  This creates a TOTALLY different dynamic than what exists in FSU.

In FSU women chase MEN of high quality.  A man without a two bottle of vodka a day habit and a good career can get his choice of thousands of women that CHASE HIM!

AW are spoiled when it comes to men.  I have seen that they would prefer to live in a crappy environment rather that to depend on a man to help them as a partner in life.

I forget the number exactly - but it is something like 3-4 out of every 10 children in America's father is not their actual mom's husband.  Some researchers did DNA samples of something like 10,000 families and found this out.  So...  if you have a son or daughter by an AW - I hope he/she looks just like you for your sake.  You might be one of the lucky 7 out of 10 that their wife didn't find a different sperm donor.

And the worst part about the AW is that some of us actually tolerate that crap!  I put up with SO MUCH BS from my first wife - then went from one AW after another finding out one common denominator:  They are all about as good to reason with as a BRICK.  Only with a brick you have a chance that it will listen when you tell it:  "Leave me alone."

So...  as I have demonstrated here I have bitterness toward AW.  This has not affected my wonderful relationship with my RW wife.

[GoodBrew]

GB,

I agree negativity of any sort can be bad while visiting a RW in person...  BUT...  I also had a very bad taste in my mouth about AW compared to women abroad.  I have been burned by so many in one way or another.  This has nothing to do with my confidence.

I should have worded my response differently to Chern as my remark about confidence was directed solely at him.   

[ScottinCrimea]

Oh yeah what was this that Eduard told me that these dating sites are being used almost enitely by women of ulterior motives and ill repute.  He said I would be very unlikely to find a decent girl there but does this apply even to the "good" sites like Elena's M or bride.ru??

Chernoble,  Keep in mind that the agencies are eduards's business competitors so take any negative he says about them or any other method of pursuing this with a grain of salt.

[chernoble]

Ah thanks I'll keep that in mind. 

This sort of negativity toward AW

You know if the stuff that was said about AW was a stereotype and not based on true experiences you would have a point.  As it is I was just telling facts and Maxxum's experiences of the marriage/divorce rinse and repeat cycle with AW is also something that I have personally seen (I have many friends and coworkers who have been through on average 2-3 divorces with AW and plenty of GFs sleeping behind their back.  Even though this seems to be "normal" in America I prefer to not join that club.)

Just because I don't like AW doesn't mean I'm going to have that same feeling for RW.  In fact it made me appreciate loyal and honest women wherever they may be because I realize if I ever found one I would love her more than anything because they are a true rarity in this world.

[Misha]

I have many friends and coworkers who have been through on average 2-3 divorces with AW and plenty of GFs sleeping behind their back.  Even though this seems to be "normal" in America I prefer to not join that club.

Maybe, but let's not forget that these women are sleeping with someone, and I presume that they are not all sleeping with other women. Unless there are a lot of single guys getting a heck-of-a-lot of sex, it seems to me that for AW to be cheating on their husbands or boyfriends to that extent, they must be sleeping with a lot of married men or men with girlfriends.

[groovlstk]

(I have many friends and coworkers who have been through on average 2-3 divorces with AW and plenty of GFs sleeping behind their back.  Even though this seems to be "normal" in America I prefer to not join that club.)

If you think it's any different in Russia or Ukraine, you're in for an unpleasant surprise.

[Christian]

Why do you think so? From the picture, I wouldn't tell that her body has an inclination to swell with age..especially in thigh area..that depends on her genes that we don't know.

Lily,

...and diet and exercise.  I don't have to tell you that a woman, speaking of physiological make-up, have by nature more fat cells than men.  These fat cells never disappear, but rather expand or strink.  Women consequently are able to float whereas men have to dog-paddle to stay above water.  I think the reason they are so constituted is because of their ability to bear children and the need to stay warm - or something like that.

Christian

[Lily]

Christian,

you are generally right, but we shall not forget that a healthy woman may reach a maximum of her weight around her 20-22 yo, and then either stay in the same weight, or even shrink with age when estrogene starts leaving her body. This hormone lives in body fat, so less estrogene may mean less fat. Aging may mean shrinking in size..

Therefore I just wouldn't presume that a woman's body most likely gains volume with age. It may be the case, but it may not. Hard to predict, even looking at the mother.

[chernoble]

Thanks for everyone's insightful comments.  You have really broadened my perspective of things and made me think of certain things in a new light.

I have one last important question though:

Which is the fastest mail service from USA to Russia?  I have heard US postal is too slow to deliver around the holidays even with the speediest service class so maybe Fedex?  But then again I don't want to send holiday cards in a bulky FedEx envelope so anyone know of any other kind of mail?

[MaxxumUSA]

Which is the fastest mail service from USA to Russia?  I have heard US postal is too slow to deliver around the holidays even with the speediest service class so maybe Fedex?  But then again I don't want to send holiday cards in a bulky FedEx envelope so anyone know of any other kind of mail?

DHL is probably the best for any package.

I have also used UPS for letter carrying although they cost me $120.00 for a standard letter packet.

USPS is nice because you can send under 70 lbs for about $120.00.  Takes a week or two to get there.

[BillyB]

Which is the fastest mail service from USA to Russia?  I have heard US postal is too slow to deliver around the holidays even with the speediest service class so maybe Fedex?  But then again I don't want to send holiday cards in a bulky FedEx envelope so anyone know of any other kind of mail?

Postal mail I've sent out has reached Ukriane and Uzbekistan in under two weeks. A letter can cost you 80 cents but cost over $50 with rush service from other private companies. Christmas in the FSU is in January. Save money and send your stuff by US postal now and it should get there in time.

[Gator]

My experience with regular mail to Russia is that 25% is never delivered.

[BillyB]

My experience with regular mail to Russia is that 25% is never delivered.

That's bad Gator. And to think, who was claiming there was as much corruption in Western society as there is in the FSU? The citizens are constantly robbed by the people who work for their government.

[Christian]

Christian,

you are generally right, but we shall not forget that a healthy woman may reach a maximum of her weight around her 20-22 yo, and then either stay in the same weight, or even shrink with age when estrogene starts leaving her body. This hormone lives in body fat, so less estrogene may mean less fat. Aging may mean shrinking in size..

Therefore I just wouldn't presume that a woman's body most likely gains volume with age. It may be the case, but it may not. Hard to predict, even looking at the mother.

Thanks Lily and you too are generally right.  However, I was not predicting anything, but rather making an observation about how a woman can manipulate her own body and bring it into conformity to her expectations.

Doubtless, there are those who (for example a thyroid condition) have no control over their own body form (whether a male or female).  I didn't have them in mind in the previous post.

Cheers!

Christian

[Gator]

Cher asked,

Oh btw Gator why don't you think I'm ready for this? 

I say you are not ready because I see in you two contradictory "rescue" attitudes, neither of which is good for wooing RW:

1.  You seem to have a knight in shining armour attitude looking to rescue a fair maiden who will then be true to you forever.

2.  You are lonely and could easily come across as asking a RW to rescue you from yourself.

Only you can answer whether you are either of these or both.  If "yes', you need to change your attitude.  If "no", then I am wrong and knock yourself out as per your comment:

Life is a learning experience and it is all about risks after all and if I'm afraid of taking a risk now and then life is not worth living isn't it.

You are young, and if you have a healthy attitude, you should enjoy the experience, whether or not you find a wife of your dreams.   For sure, in the process you will learn something about yourself.

[chernoble]

Thanks for the info everyone.  I was also wondering is there a map website I can goto to verify or find an address in Russia?  I need a zip code for some places but its very hard for me to find and when I checked out Russia on mapquest the data was only shown for the whole city it doesn't goto street level for some reason.  And the even bigger problem was that the Russian street names and cities are all in Russian on Google Maps!  Why aren't they in English?  If I write an address in English to a Russian destination will they deliver it to the right place if that address is written in Russian (Russian st, Russian bld etc.)

[SANDRO43]

See if you can find something useful in this section of the RWDpedia: 
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/index.php?title=Maps .

[Lily]

Google Earth is pretty good. I quickly find my Moscow address on it.

[Taz]

I second Lily's suggestion for Google Earth IF you are looking in the bigger cities in the FSU. Smaller towns, not so great.

As for agencies, I would suggest Angelika.net. They basically just host the master database of all the little individidual agencies that are affiliated with them. For example if you go into a town, you won't usually find an agency named "Angelika" but it will have some other name such as XYZ Marriage Agency.

While I can't say that in general I am a big fan of agencies, I can say that Angelika seems to be well ran in general at least inside of Ukraine for example. I acted as a guide for a friend of mine in several cities in Ukraine and it seemed we hit every affiliated Angelika agency within a 300 square kilometer area while he was trying to find the ideal woman.

I must have met 10 different agency owners that were affiliated with Angelika and in general they were sincere and knew their women. I personally have made it a policy to never use an agency but after that experience I am definitely far less anti-agency than I was before. SO...if I were to seriously consider using an agency, I would put Angelika network at the top of my list. They do seem to insist on consistency from their affiliates and they seem well ran (at least in Ukraine). I can't vouch for any other country they operate in. I have met one of their main people, David S., in person and he appears very involved with only having high quality agencies associated with Angelika.