Swisskids' Excellent Ukrainian Adventure!

[myrddin]

SK, this looks very much like the Celentano's chain I've seen in other Ukraine cities. Did they serve a lot of pizzas with corn as a topping?  I always felt at home in these places as the coffee was fantastic and they played mostly American rock music from the 50s.

(We all spent some time at Celentano's - good stuff!)

[Mir]

I is always amusing to note that all the guys in their 40s who go to FSU looking for women look 5-10 years younger then they are. Perhaps that is the reason they could not find a mate in their own country

[Taz]

My ex-RW was the closest women ever to my age that I dated once I was over 28. She was within 7 years of my age. I guess I really robbed the cradle with her! 

The last AW I dated was over 10 years younger than me. Typical AW I've dated though in the last 10 years has been about 12-15 years younger than me. I am tyipically dating RW/UW that are about 15 years younger than me so not much different than at home.

[Swisskid]

I is always amusing to note that all the guys in their 40s who go to FSU looking for women look 5-10 years younger then they are. Perhaps that is the reason they could not find a mate in their own country

I date women 15 years younger than me here in the USA.  Actually the oldest woman I have ever dated in the US is 31 and I am currently 46.  What attracted me to the FSU is that high quality educated women seem to be more plentiful and the attitudes better.  I am very discouraged by the attitudes and priorities of many American women.  There is nothing wrong with casting your net a little wider....

I found a wife in my own country.  Turns out she was defective.  I threw her back...

Lighten up....

[LiveFromUkraine]

I is always amusing to note that all the guys in their 40s who go to FSU looking for women look 5-10 years younger then they are. Perhaps that is the reason they could not find a mate in their own country

I never went to FSU looking for a wife.

Mir, out of curiosity, are you married?



Thomas

[Taz]

I can't say I ever expressly went there either to look for a wife. First trip years ago was to tag along with my parents while they trained Russian dentists. Later I kept going back just for the fun of it. Great place to take a vacation once you know the ins and outs. I didn't even realize it was so popular to look specifically for a Russian wife until after I had dated several women over a few years and one of the women pointed me to some of these forums. It was a shock to me.

When I lived in Europe I was still attracted to the Russian women. When I worked in Moscow it was quite a treat for me. It was very hard to come back to the US as I missed being around the women all the time. I didn't miss Moscow that much. I'd rather be in Siberia or Crimea than Moscow most of the time. Plus Moskvichki are a unique breed of women anyway. They tend to take a litte getting used to as most citizens of Moscow do. Many tend to have an elitist attitude and that is a real turn-off to me but I digress.

That is why I suggested to SK to go to Ukraine. Much less hassle than in Russia with police, no visa issues, much easier to get around in a lot of ways and more bang for the buck.

So SK, we are all waiting for your next installment of the trip report! Let's get a move on here buddy!!!!

[Swisskid]

Day 2 in Mari

It is Day 2 in Mari and Taz's handi-dandi taxi service picks me up for my 12:00 with Lady 3.  We have some time so we stop downtown and get something to eat.  We are walking around after we park the car and there is an artist who has placed his paintings along a fence parallel to the sidewalk.  As we are admiring his art work, Taz points one out to me.  The only problem is he points with his foot.  The artist immediately freaks out and starts yelling at Taz in Russian.  Taz retorts in Russian and their conversation is rather animated.  I have no idea what either is saying.  We leave and I ask Taz what the hell that was all about.  

"He didn't like me pointing with my foot"

"Oh"....

That was interesting.  We grab a quick bite and I get a coffee before my date.  Taz is heading over to Lana's so he does not eat much.  There is much activity to observe in the street through the restaurant windows.  

We leave and head over to pick up myrddin so we can make our 12:00PM dates.

 Don Juan Capistrano...errr, I mean myrddin has a full dance card today with 4 more dates scheduled.

We arrive at the agency early and no ladies are there yet.  Taz bugs out to Lana's and myrddin and I chat with Agency owner A.  She is really a great lady.  I was very impressed and pleased with the services she and her terps provided.  She opened up her agency on a weekend just for us.  Taz negotiated fantastic rates for our group for which myrddin and I are eternally grateful.  Especially myrddin as I am sure as he spent many times more than I did on agency services.  Taz saved both of us a ton of $$$.  

myrddin's date shows up and so does his hot blonde terp.  He knows how to pick 'em.  Date #5 is stunning as well.  He is going to have some hard decision-making ahead....

Off they go and Agency owner A calls my 12:00 to get an ETA.

Bad news, my 12:00 has to cancel and reschedule.  It seems that the repairman she has been trying for a week to get to repair her water heater in her flat has shown up unannounced on a Sunday morning.  She is tied up and cannot leave him there.  

So now I have about an hour and a half to kill until my second date with Lady Z.  From this point on we will call her Zana.

Agency owner A is very apologetic and wants to call many girls to set up additional dates with me throughout the rest of the week.  She says I look much better in person than my pictures and much younger and more fit than my age would indicate.  She is excited to tell this to the girls that are on the fence whether they want to go out with me.  I thank her for the compliments and half wonder if she is just buttering me up to spend more money at her agency.  

We sit and start going through some additional women's profiles on her computer.  She starts telling me tidbits of information about the different ladies as they come up on the screen and I start getting a "mother hen" vibe from her.  After about a half hour of this I am convinced she is genuinely interested in finding me a good woman, not just taking my rapidly devaluing dollars.  

She wants to get on the phone and start lining up more dates immediately but I tell her to wait as I have not yet decided if I am going to Crimea tomorrow.  I will let her know tomorrow.  

She shows me around her agency office.  She has really done a first class job setting this place up.  She shows me her photography studio and her various meeting rooms.  The floor in the entire place is nice new ceramic tile and the entire suite is very tastfully decorated.  The main office area has a beautiful view out a large window to a field and trees.  There is a full kitchen as well with a microwave, stove, and full size refrigerator.  She makes me some coffee and we talk for about another half an hour.  

Then who should show up but Terp A.  Zana and I are doubling with Lana and Taz so I will not need her today.  I explain this to Agency owner A and Terp A.  I pull out a $20 bill and try to give it to Terp A since she came all the way in to work today.  She does not want to take it.  I insist, "buy something nice for your little boy" I say.  Reluctantly she takes it with a smile and puts it in her pocket.

I again tell Agency owner A what a gem she has here in Terp A and Terp A beams and blushes.  She is really a little sweetie pie.  In walks Zana and she looks great.  She is wearing tight jeans with high heels, and a light peach tight fuzzy blouse and a light jacket.  I go to her and kiss her cheek.  She gives me a big smile.  We make small talk and in a few minutes Taz and Lana arrive for our double date.  Taz and I had arranged for him to pick up some flowers for Zana on the way back from Lana's as there is a large flower market right on the way.  I present the arrangement to Zana and she likes them alot.  Brownie points for SK!

We pile into the Ford and head back to my place.  I minted the place out the night before anticipating that we would be entertaining the ladies today. I even mopped the floor with this funky Russian Pine Sol stuff so it smells good.  Zana loves my flat and says it must be one of the nicest apartments in Mari.  Wow, quite an endorsement.  It is a cool little bachelor pad.  It even has a giant hookah incense burner.

I put out various munchies:  beef jerky, pistachios, virginia peanuts, cashews, and cheddar in a can.  Unfortunately I have already eaten the box of Triscuits I brought on the plane.  I have some nice dark Ukrainian bread but Zana indicates she does not eat bread.  Taz and I proceed to mix some cocktails.  I mix a Southern Comfort and Coke for Zana.  Little did I know that this would now become her favorite drink for the rest of the trip.  She loves the stuff, almost as much as Taz' beef jerky!  I mix myself a stiff Virginia Gentleman bourbon and Coke.  Taz and Lana are drinking Bacardi and Coke.  We belly up to the nice little granite bar on our barstools and the conversation flows freely, even though 3 people are speaking Russian and I am speaking English.  Taz translates for me from time to time which I appreciate.  Otherwise, I am enjoying just soaking it all in...

 We put the TV on the Ukrainian MTV channel and the party is on.  We just have a great time hanging out at my flat all afternoon.  It also appears that Lana and Zana are becoming fast friends.  

Zana is actually learning English and we can communicate ourselves somewhat, she just says I have to speak very slowly.  I will learn later in the week that communicating this way can be a somewhat sensual process...

We adjourn to the living room and Zana and I snuggle up on the red leather couch.  The afternoon is flying by quickly and it is obvious everyone is having a great time.  Taz asks me if I want to go to a club this evening with the ladies  and I say that sounds great.  This creates great excitement in the ladies and they decide on the club we should go to.  The club they decide on is hard to get a table at so we need to go over there and make a reservation.

We head over there and park on a dirt area.  There is not really a paved parking area.  A huge german shepherd comes straight for Taz.  A security guard in a camoflauge army outfit runs over says something in Russian to Taz.  He gets his dog under control and we walk in.  We stop and admire the nice landscaping in front before we go in.  It is a cool place inside with an aeronautical theme.  The place is empty except for the staff.  

We are told there is a 500 hv minimum we have to spend to reserve a table.  We say OK and a waitress proceeds to give us menus.  For the next half hour we all pick things from the menu and the waitress writes them all in her little ledger book.  We order everything and we still have not hit 500 hv.  We keep ordering things until we finally hit 500 hv.  I think it was the cigar I ordered that finally put us over.  I had to chuckle that they had USA Phillies Blunt Chocolate flavor listed as a premium cigar on the menu.  Maybe I can start a racket smuggling $1 packs of Marlboros back to the states and smuggling $2 packs of Blunts back to Ukraine?

I think we are going to have enough food to feed a small army.  We thank the waitress and head out back to my place.  We hang out for a while and feed more liquor to the ladies before we head to Zana's flat so she and Lana can get ready.  Taz and I wait in the car for them.  We discuss what an awesome day it has been and how it appears the evening will be even better.  I tell him I am really digging Zana.  I'm pretty sure he knows this already...  

The girls come back and it was definitely worth the wait.  Holy Guacomole!
We are going to have some fun tonight!  Zana is dressed in a tight black sparkly dress with a red sequined belt and red faux alligator-skin go-go boots.  Wow!  (This is a word I will exclaim regularly throughout the next week to the point where the girls tease me about it)

I kiss her cheek and tell Zana she looks stunning.  I inadvertantly get Taz in hot water with Lana because she immediately inquires what it means, "stunning"?  Taz explains it to her in Russian and I deduce she is not sufficiently happy with the compliment that Taz paid to her when she finds out what "stunning' means.  Dang, these Russian women are complicated!

Taz has been checking in with myrddin on and off all day.  It sounds like Don Juan Capistrano is having the time of his life.  I couldn't be happier for him, he is going to be a good catch for some lucky girl.  He is a hell of a nice guy and I think these women can pick up on that right away.

Taz also has been checking in with JD and it sounds like things are not going quite so well on that front....

We arrive back at the club and the dog again takes an interest in Taz but is restrained by the security thug.  We get inside and we have the first booth near the dance floor.  Prime location.  The spread of food in front of us is quite impressive.  They have already layed out the cold food dishes in a nice presentation.  It all looks great.  I ordered a sushi plate and I persuade Zana to try some.  She likes it and we end up sharing the rest of it.  I feed it to her with chopsticks.  We order drinks and I let Zana order for me.  She orders these vodka martini cocktail things with fruit juice.  You mix it together a little at a time.  They are quite good.  The waitress proceeds to bring us the rest of our food and it just keeps coming and coming...  It is all excellent!  I am quite impressed with this place so far.  

      
  




            

[myrddin]

We sit and start going through some additional women's profiles on her computer.  She starts telling me tidbits of information about the different ladies as they come up on the screen and I start getting a "mother hen" vibe from her.  After about a half hour of this I am convinced she is genuinely interested in finding me a good woman, not just taking my rapidly devaluing dollars.  

She wants to get on the phone and start lining up more dates immediately but I tell her to wait as I have not yet decided if I am going to Crimea tomorrow.  I will let her know tomorrow.              

I definitely sensed that everyone at that agency really cared about their clients (men and women).  They wanted the best for everyone.  The agency owner was very proud of the number of marriages (and children!) that resulted from introductions at her agency.

About looking at profiles: In my only inter-date down time, after the third meeting on Day 1, Taz and the agency people were talking about who was my best meeting so far.  My terp thought it was Lady B, and I can see why though even at the time I was thinking more about Ladies A and C.

The owner could see I was dead on my feet, though, and asked if we should reschedule my evening date.  I actually thought about it, too (shameful!), but asked to see her profile again.  I’d reviewed all the profiles, of course, but concentrated on the earlier meetings.

As soon as the first picture of my Lady D was partially loaded on the screen I said, “I’m going.”    They all laughed, I’m sure thinking my decision was based solely on her looks.  But I actually remembered the entire profile as soon as I realized who it was, which was the real reason I would not cancel.

Well, that and her looks     

[Swisskid]

Day II Part II

So far my second date with Zana has exceeded all of my expectations.  I really feel comfortable in my own skin around this woman and she is very relaxed and natural around me as well.  The non-verbal communication going on more than makes up for the language barrier.  I am slowly realizing I may have struck gold with my first introduction in Ukraine.  I have been told it happens, albeit very rarely, to certain lucky men. 

It is an indescribable feeling being with Zana.  Her deep blue sapphire eyes and electric smile just melt me.  She just lights up when she laughs.  I grow more fond of her with each passing hour and it is very obvious she is developing feelings for me as well.  It just feels so natural and comfortable being with her.  I was not expecting this to happen so fast when I stepped off of that plane 2 days ago.  I was really not expecting anything at all other than to have a great vacation and learn about a facinating new culture and soak up a little history....

We enjoy our incredible meal.  Taz is translating the highlights of the conversation to me and Zana and I are really just enjoying being with each other.  The club is starting to fill up.  It is a very mixed crowd of old and young, singles and couples.

Finally the music starts.  There are male and female dancers on opposite stages in different outfits.  It is Ukrainian techno-pop of which I will hear a lot of over the next week.  I find it kind of ironic that one of the most popular Ukrainian pop groups is composed of 3 incredibly hot women and is named "Viagra".  No viagra needed with them I am sure.  I hear their music every day around Ukraine the rest of the time I am there.  Kinda catchy.  Grows on you...

The girls decide they want to go dance for a bit.  The dance floor is pretty close to our table so it is almost like Taz and I have our own table dancers. 

There are only a few others dancing.  Every guy in the club has his eyes on our girls.  2 hot women in heels over 6 feet tall dressed to kill.  It is a little slice of heaven.

I am blown away at the moves these women make.  After a while I am convinced that they both must have double-jointed hips.  How do they do that?  For very tall ladies, they both dance quite gracefully.  It is an amazing thing to see.  A sight to behold...

It strikes me as odd that groups of men are dancing together with no women.  I am told by Zana that it is normal here.  I tell her in the USA only gays do that.  She thinks this is funny.

The female dancers move around to different stages and change costumes after every couple of songs.  The place is filling up and it is getting very warm inside. 

Zana comes back to the table after a while and she is kind of sweaty.  She has been dancing up a storm.  Soon after they play a slow song and I ask Zana if she would like to dance.  She is still winded from her fast dancing and wants to catch her breath and rest for a little bit.  My bad luck.

We finish our vodka cocktails and I order a Ukrainian draft which I will milk for the rest of the evening.  I am still quite jetlagged and I am really feeling it so I do not want to drink too much.  I am afraid if I do I will lose what little energy I have left.
Zana has to work in the morning and just orders a glass of fruit juice.

I have still not made up my mind about going to Crimea tomorrow.  We have flats rented in Sevastopol but I am torn if I want to leave Zana and not see her for several days.  I am feeling there may be real possibilities with her.  I have asked her to go with us but she says she must work from 9-5 at her law office and then she goes to driving school from 6-8PM. 

I do not want this night to end.  At 1:30AM Zana says she must leave in half an hour.  I repeat my offer to Zana to accompany us to Crimea and she says to call her tomorrow at 10AM.  She dances a little more with Lana and then it is 2AM.  Time for her to go. 

Taz informs me that Lana is not ready to go yet.  She wants to dance some more.  I decide to get a taxi to take Zana and I back to our flats.  Taz writes down the address to my flat so I can show it to the Taxi driver.  We say goodnight and Zana and I head outside.  There are several taxis waiting so we jump right in to one.  My apartment is closest so I am first to jettison the cab.  It turns out the club is only about 5 blocks from my flat.  We could have walked there but Zana is in a hurry to get home since it is very late on a work night for her.

We arrive at my building in a very short time and I kiss her goodnight and hand her a 50 hv note for the taxi fare.  She looks very sad that we have to part.  We give each other a big hug  and hold each other for a few seconds.  I kiss her again before I exit the cab and tell her once more that I will call her at 10AM.  And then she is off into the night....

I am exhausted as I enter my flat.  I am agonizing over this decision now.  I really want to see Crimea but I also want to spend more time with this incredible woman I have just met yesterday.  But she is busy every day until 8PM. 

I cannot sleep.  I toss and turn for hours trying to sleep not being able to get Zana out of my mind.  Finally I reach a decision with myself - I will tell Zana I will stay here in Mari if she will guarantee me at least 2 hours of time after her driving lessons each night.  I can occupy myself during the day if she will guarantee time in the evening after her obligations.  This is my decision...

I manage to finally get a couple of hours rest.  I call Taz when I wake up and inform him of my decision.  He thinks it is a wise decision.  I ask him if he will call Zana and tell this to her since I don't think she will understand my English if I call her.  Taz calls Zana at 10AM sharp.  Now what am I going to do all day to occupy my time?  I I guess I will be doing some exploring on the scooter....

Taz calls me back at about 10:30.  The news he has about floors me...

"Zana is coming with us to Crimea" he says.

"WHAT???"

"Zana is coming with us, man, we need to pick her up in an hour"

"NO WAY"

"Way, dude, you better get ready"

Apparently Zana had shown the pictures she had taken of us together on her cell phone while we were on our first date at the pier to her director at her law firm.  The director told her "you must go with this man".  She is using sick leave or something like that to take the entire week off to go to Crimea with me.  I feel like doing cartwheels across the floor of my flat.  I am one happy guy!!!

I have an hour to pack up all of my shit and clean up the apartment so we can get our deposit back.  We will be travelling to Sevastopol and using that as a base for day trips to Yalta and elsewhere in Crimea for the next 5 days.  The best part is we will be in Sevastopol for Victory Day, May 9th.  Sevastopol is a Hero City of the Soviet Union and has one of the largest celebrations in the FSU for Victory Day.  I am told that only Moscow, Kiev, and St. Petersburg are larger.  This is going to be an amazing week!...!...! 
       

             

[dneid]

Hey, Swisskid,
Let's get crackin' on the TR.  Be glad I do not have your phone number like I do myrddin's.  Seriously, I am waiting for your next few installments with great anticipation

[myrddin]

Hey, Swisskid,
Let's get crackin' on the TR.  Be glad I do not have your phone number like I do myrddin's. 

SK, he's not kidding - I'd pay attention to that implied threat!   

[henryLauson]

Ok SK,

I’m old enough to be your father, and it appears that you need some “fatherly” discipline; so here’s the deal. 

It’s been a week since we’ve heard from you; and you’re obviously wasting your time idlely dreaming about the FSU beauties when you could be pumping out a few more installments of this trip report for us.  If you don’t “get with the program” soon and give us another installment or two of this trip report I’m going to ground you for the next year and there will be no more trips to the FSU to see the lovely ladies.

Have I made myself abundantly clear?

(Really… enjoying your TR, can’t wait for the next installment)

[dneid]

Ok SK,

I’m old enough to be your father, and it appears that you need some “fatherly” discipline; so here’s the deal. 

It’s been a week since we’ve heard from you; and you’re obviously wasting your time idlely dreaming about the FSU beauties when you could be pumping out a few more installments of this trip report for us.  If you don’t “get with the program” soon and give us another installment or two of this trip report I’m going to ground you for the next year and there will be no more trips to the FSU to see the lovely ladies.

Have I made myself abundantly clear?

(Really… enjoying your TR, can’t wait for the next installment)

Here, here!!!  Same for me SK.  Really enjoying the TRs.

[Bart]

Nice TR, Swisskid.  Keep it up!

[Swisskid]

Sorry for the delay guys and I appreciate the encouragement.  The threats, not so much... :hairraising:  My laptop has been in the shop getting a new DVD drive put in it so I can begin my RUSLAN CD-ROM Russian lessons when they arrive.  I just ordered the RUSLAN I CD-ROM and book from jolly old England per Taz' recomendation and my DVD drive was kaput after my 6 year old left the drive door open and knocked my laptop off of her bed and busted it all to s%!t after watching a movie. 
(Plus I was a little hung over from the Pearl Jam concert Tuesday night.)  :noidea: 

Back in the saddle this weekend, I promise! 

...........On to Crimea!!...............   

[Swisskid]

South by Southwest

It is almost time for Taz to pick me up from my flat and I have gotten everything packed up.  Then I remember that Taz had brought over some homemade pastries and this nasty chunky gelatinous goo stuff from Lana's mother that were still in the refrigerator.  The little pastries consisted of homemade fruit preserves baked inside this delicious flaky crust.  I had already eaten most of those.  I eat the rest  of them for breakfast with my coffee.  They are delicious!

The problem is what to do with this other goo stuff which is in a nice china bowl that I need to clean so Taz can give it back to Lana's mother. 
The sink in the kitchen has no garbage disposal so I find an empty plastic shopping bag to scape it out in and put in the trash can.  It is some scary looking stuff...

Zana arrives at my flat and I give her a big hug and kiss on the cheek.  She is beaming.  I make her some coffee in my little kitchen and we talk as best we can in our slow, meticulous English.   

I can't believe how light she is traveling.  She has only one small bag and her purse.  I tell her how happy I am that she can go with us to Crimea and she tells me the story of how her director at the law firm saw the pictures of our first date on Zana's cell phone camera and basically instructed her to go with me.  Pretty damn cool boss if you ask me! 

Zana does not speak a whole lot of English but she tells me if I speak very slowly she can understand some English.  She shows me her little English workbook and she also has a Russian/English dictionary.  She has a notebook filled with pages of her writing where she has broken down many nouns, verbs, tenses, definitions, etc.  We will spend some of our road time in the back seat of our trusty Ford with me helping her review some of her lessons.  She really wants to learn English and has a decent start already.  For now though she is concentrating on her driving lessons until her planned completion of classes and licensing in July.

Taz and Lana arrive and we start loading up the Ford.  It becomes apparent that we are again overloading our car.  Not to worry, this little ride can take it.  I have an entirely new-found respect for Fords due to our experience with this tough little European Focus.
 
Zana closes the door tight when she uses the bathroom before we leave and of course she is now locked in.  It takes a little work to get her out of there but she now understands why I was late for our first date quite clearly....

We finally roll out of town later than we had hoped but all in good spirits and excited to hit the road.  It is an absolutely beautiful sunny spring day in eastern Ukraine.  I am struck as we leave town by the fact that at the edge of the city it just changes from highrise buildings to countryside immediately.  We will not see a real city again until we pass through Simferopol several hours from now.

It is all fields and tiny villages until we get to Crimea.  Everything is very green from the rainstorm on Saturday.  The fields are busy with planting and cultivating.  Babushkas can be seen from the road working in small potato fields near tiny farmhouses. 

I have relatives who still farm in North Dakota so it is facinating for me to observe the antiquated farm equipment working in several fields that we drive by.  We pass a couple of giant fields filled with some kind of small yellow-flowered crop.  I am not familiar with what it is but I imagine it is some kind of oil-seed crop.  The flowers are in full bloom.
 
Anyhow, Lana wants Taz to stop the car so she can get out and pick some of these little yellow crop flowers.  Taz stops and Lana runs to the field edge and picks a few buds.  These are some of the biggest fields I have ever seen in my life, and they have pretty big fields in North Dakota.  These Ukraine fields are so big you cannot even see the other end.  The little yellow flowers go as far as the eye can see all the way to the horizon.  It is a yellow sea.....
     
   

[Swisskid]

Lana gets back in the car and soon we are cruising over 140kph again.  Taz loves to drive fast.  We are trying to make up some time since we left Mari later than planned.  It is a long drive to Sevastopol....

The girls and Taz enjoy their conversation in Russian and Taz translates for me now and again or when one of the girls asks me a question in Russian.  I am really enjoying the company and just observing the beautiful countryside with all of the spring activities going on.  We drove from Kiev to Mari all night so it is nice to be traveling during the day and be able to see the authentic Ukrainian countryside and how the locals live.  I am thoroughly enjoying the drive.

Zana and I work on her English notebook for a while.  After a couple of hours on the road Zana gets tired and lays her head down on my lap to try to take a little nap.  She was up quite late with us at the club last night and she had to be at work by 8AM this morning.

So here I am in the back seat of a bottomed out Ford Focus blowing down the highway at 150 kph with a beautiful strawberry blonde woman's head resting on my lap and my arm holding her.  I am amazed at how much has happened in the 2 and 1/2 days I have been here so far.  I am also amazed at how relaxed I feel at that moment.  Not tired, but just relaxed and content, and truly feeling very lucky to be just where I am right now...

Taz and I have found that we both have kind of a rapid-fire, warped sense of humor.  We like to exchange one-liners to each other, especially double-entendre jokes and observations.  We do this so fast that the girls can't understand what we are saying.  We will develop this into a fine art by the end of the week.  It is a very good thing that the girls do not understand us, trust me........but we sure crack ourselves up!

Zana wakes from her little nap and is hungry so we break out our snacks.  I have never seen a girl go so crazy for beef jerky.  She is infatuated by the stuff.  But she likes Taz' gourmet stuff he brought much better than the cheap stuff I brought.  So much she puts it in her purse for later. 

Finally the road gets near the Black Sea and you can smell the salt in the air.  We cross a narrow part of the peninsula and we are entering Crimea.  We drive for a little ways and come upon a large fish market along the side of the road.  Fish markets will be all along the road for the next 50-60 kilometers. 

Fishermen are selling every conceivable kind of fish from carts, tables, backs of cars, you name it.  We do not have time to stop but I am amazed at the size of some of these fish.  We drive by one guy and he holds this giant flounder above his head for us, hoping to entice our car to stop.  This fish is huge!  The guy could barely lift it above his head.  There is octopus, squid, every shape and size of fish to be bought fresh from today's catch along this road.

I will find out that fresh food is the norm in Crimea.  It reminds me of Greece and I believe the climate is fairly similar.  I will get spoiled by the awesome fresh food over the course of the next week.  I was worried before my trip if the food would be any good over here.  I had visions of Babushkas serving leeks and cabbage with the odd potato dish thrown in.  I was so worried I almost brought Spam.  Taz assured me over the phone prior to our trip that the food in Ukraine is quite good, as good as in the US.

Taz was wrong, the food in Ukraine is MUCH BETTER than the food in the US.  It is all FRESH!  Now that I am back home I find that I am missing the awesome quality of the fresh ingredients that everything was prepared from during my visit. 

We are making great time as we near Simferopol.  Zana calls her sister who lives in Simf and asks where is a good restaurant?  The ones she suggests are either too far away or too hard to find.  We roll through Simferopol and head out of town.  Going up a long hill we hit a curve in the road and Taz recognizes a good place he has eaten at before as we drive by it so he slams on the brakes and we whip a U-turn in the middle of the highway into the parking lot. 

The restaurant is on the east side of a hill with nice woods behind it.  There is a nice little landscaped courtyard in front.  We head into the restaurant and the hostess takes our group off to the side into a VIP room with a little TV in it.  We sit at a big round table but on the side that has booth seating.  Zana and I snuggle in together. 

Taz says the food here is great and they serve authentic Georgian and Tatar food.  They even have menus in English.  This is going to be a great meal, I can tell, and the atmosphere can't be beat in our own room.

We order a kalidescope of food and we all sample bites of each others dishes to try them.  The food is beyond belief good.  And we have a ton of it.  I have the best Greek salad I have ever had in my life to start off.  Incredibly fresh feta and vegetables.  Zana and I both have a thing for olives so at this and many other meals in the future we order trays of both black and green olives.  Lana likes borscht and sevlanka and gets sevlanka this time.  I like soups too so I will follow her example in many meals to come.       

I decide on the Pork combination plate that is recommended by Taz.  He says they take fresh cutlets and beat the crap out of them before preparing.  I am glad I took his advice and the first are roasted and very flavorful and tender and the second style are roasted and then baked with melted cheese.  They are then served with these awesome mashed potatoes with cheese.  It was very, very good, the entire meal.  It makes my mouth water just thinking of it again....

We thoroughly enjoy our incredible meal and the conversation flows freely.  We are all having a great time.  Lots of laughter.  I notice a little shot glass with cyrillic script on it and tell the waitress I would like to buy one as a souvenir.  She comes back in a few minutes with a shot of vodka in one of the glasses.  OK, I'm game...  It goes down very smooth and now I have my little glass. 

I think the name of this place was "Ali Baba's".  Our bill for 4 people was only about $50 with drinks.  We ordered a LOT of food.  I highly recommend this place.  The service was top-notch and the food was fantastic!  Some of the best I have ever had....


   

       

[Taz]

You b@st@rd. You had to go and post the pics of the restaurant! 

I've been craving that place for days already since I was writing about it. It is likely my absolute favorite restaurant in Ukraine. I've been going there for about 7 years or so. I definitely tried to hook you up with good food while there that is for sure.

I've been trying to keep my posts somewhat droll so you can relate some of the more interesting things such as the double-entendre comments. Can you say "warm, wet, ..."  You know the rest. We never did tell myrddin about these. 

[Ooooops]

Sounds like great trip!   

But isn't it "Zhanna", not Zana, and "solyanka" ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solyanka ), not sevlanka?

[Taz]

The entire premise was to use fake names. Zana, Zhana, etc. isn't her real name. He could call her kumquat or potato or even potatoe and it would still all be ok. 

The main thing is we all know who is talking about and it is more personal that A, B, C, D, ...

[Ooooops]

The entire premise was to use fake names. Zana, Zhana, etc. isn't her real name. He could call her kumquat or potato or even potatoe and it would still all be ok. 

Is it the same with sevlyanka - so nobody can know what they eat for real?   

[Taz]

SwissKid will never know what he ate for sure! 

[Ooooops]

SwissKid will never know what he ate for sure! 

Poor SwissKid...   

But thanks for reminding me - I should make solyanka for my next Russian dinner.   I used to love that stuff but haven't cooked it for a while...

[docmon]

Great posts Swisskids! Can't wait to  hear what happens next!

[Jumper]

solyanka ..mmmmmm 

Swiss kid..
thanks, great trip report!
its interesting with  taz ,myriddin also giving this triple play perspective on the events

brings back a lot of memories! (its been 7 years or so, since i met my wife)
 Zhana sounds like a bubbly and a fun person to be around , lucky guy!


I can really relate to your car ride from mari to simf, and
"just being happy in the moment" feeling.
 despiye being a OMB,  I still live a lot of those moments !!
(my wife is one of those sparkly, funny, bubbly people whom can make you appreciate just those moments easily with a smile or jesture ) 

i wish for you guys that happiness!