To Kerch the Wong way... Or was it Wight?

[TheWongs]

Hi guys,

I started this trip report in December 05 on other forums, but thought I'd post it here too. Maybe it will help someone here? I hope so!

A lot of you have probably read most of it, so bear with me, be patient and the story will end.... Eventually!

[TheWongs]

I'm off to Kerch on the 8th of December. Tell y'all about it later. Bye.............................


Kidding!

Well, what can I say? I'm a WOVO optimist! I've been writing to this lady every week day since July, and I'm 100% convinced it's worth a try! This lady had something special right from the start! Hard to put a finger on it, but there are a few things that help. 1# She writes EVERY working day, even if it's to let me know that she's in a hurry and has no news! There's one letter I have and she says " I'm very busy today! Sorry. I will write tomorrow. Thinking of you". It does something to your ego to know someone is thinking about you enough to do that! Ok. I was disappointed to get that letter, but then I thought... At least she wrote, and she's thinking about me! See? I'm an optimist! 2# NEVER, in the time we have been writing, has she ever mentioned money. In fact, I'm the one who told her I would understand if she can't write every day. Her response was "don't worry about the money. I like you and I want to write to you!" The content of the letters, the little psychology tests to find out about my personality, everything. It all boils down to her being a genuine, good hearted and, nice lady. Wow! Listen to me! You'd think I'd fallen for her or something!

So, here I am, making the arrangements to get my a$$ over there! I'm not a great writer, but I'll do my best to write about the experience as I go along. I'm not even sure if I'll be near an internet cafe out there, or have the time, so I'll try to take notes where possible. I'll post my notes whenever possible... Depending on the content, of course!

My trip will take me from Belfast, N. Ireland, leaving at 21.45 on 7th of December, to Birmingham, England, arriving at about 22.45. From there, it's straight to Kiev on the 8th at 01.30. The plan is to be met at the airport, handed some train tickets and driven to the train station. I say "the plan is", because... Well... That's the plan! What happens is up to fate! Whatever does happen, you'll hear about it. I decided to take the train to Kerch for a number of reasons... First, and most important reason is my unbelievable fear of flying! It has taken me some serious "self therapy" to consider flying as far as Kiev! It's ok for you "jet setters"! You can laugh all you want, but this is serious stuff to someone like me! I was going to get a ferry to England with the car and pay for parking, while I took a coach trip to Kiev! That's how bad it is! Thankfully, I have plucked up the courage to use a silly little twin engine flying thing, to get me across the Irish sea to England, where I hope to meet a much bigger, more stable flying thing to take me to Kiev. Thats it! I'm not flying another foot after that! Anyway, there are more reasons... The train costs very little, but takes 23 hours. If I fly, it will take 1.5 hours to get to Simferopol, then I have to get a bus, train or taxi to Kerch, taking anywhere from 2.5 up to 6 hours. More connections and more trouble! As any good electrician (or plumber) will tell you "the connections are the weakest point"! Anyway, it's a LOT cheaper to use the train. The drawback is the time spent on it! I don't think it'll bother me at all. I'm used to long trips on the bike. I'll let you all know how it goes.

When I arrive in Kerch on Thursday 8th of December, there will be a beautiful blonde lady with green eyes, running up the platform, hair blowing in the breeze, boobies bouncing, arms stretched out to hug me and ki........ OH! Sorry, got carried away! She should be there to meet me and say "YUK" (in Russian of course. I don't know the translation for that word. Is it "Yukski"?)

So, that's it for the first post. I'll do updates when I have updates to do.

Cheers for now,

Chris

[TheWongs]

It was suggested that I take a notebook to write about the trip. I have my notebook packed and ready! I even remembered to pack a pen!

I intend to have a great time... No matter what happens, or doesn't happen, as the case may be!

I'm only going for 7 days in Kerch, but I think that's enough to "see how it goes". Lets face it... If she hates me, that will be six days too long!

Gee, I nearly forgot the camera!

Can't wait to get there now! Plane tickets are booked and confirmed. Still trying to get a "good" price for transfer to the train and the tickets. I'll keep you posted on this. In fact, this is the hardest part to arrange! Starting to pi$$ me off a little. Some people over there want to charge a months wages to give you a lift across town!

[TheWongs]

You're not going to believe this!... I hit the submit button on my last post and received an email, as if by magic! The email was from Pavel in Kiev with a sensible price for my train tickets to and from Kerch and the transfers to and from the train station! I am officially a happy man! Now.... Where did I leave my passport? Mmmmm...................

[TheWongs]

The daily letters are still arriving, although it's only every working day (only, he says!), so I'm expecting my first for this week later today. It's the only thing that's keeping me sane at the moment!

She's taking the time off work to be with me every day, but she may have to see a few patients (she's a dentist). Fair enough, I thought.

To be perfectly honest dudes... I'm sh1tting myself!!!! I have no idea what's going on in my head at the moment! Sure, I've met women online before, gone out, had fun and sometimes more , but for some reason this one has me in a state of panic! Maybe I'm mistaking the panic of getting on a plane, with the panic of meeting her, but it doesn't feel like that from where I'm sitting! I haven't thought about flying yet! I've had knots in my belly all weekend. Imagine how I'm going to feel when I get on the plane, or even worse, when the train is pulling into Kerch station! Don't worry, I'll get over it. I'll try to approach the situation with determination, confidence... Like a man!

I want my mommy!!!!

[TheWongs]

Got my daily letter. I must say this lady (D) is one of the only things keeping me sane at the moment! I was going to post a little part of her letter, but changed my mind... Sorry dudes. It just didn't seem right to post parts of her letter, without her permission. Basically, she's looking forward to this meeting as much as I am! She puts it into much better words, but you get the general idea. It all helps to keep me from going nuts.

If it wasn't for this board and her letters, I'd be foaming at the mouth, surrounded by rubber walls and wearing a long sleeved jacket by now! Thanks to everyone here for helping to keep me sane.... Well, as sane as I'll ever be!

[TheWongs]

Ok, I'm going to try to get myself mentally back on track with an update on the travel situation;

The flights to and from England turned out to be a b@st@rd, due to me arriving back from Kiev at 7.50pm on Friday 16th. Too late for the last flight home! Costs more to fly on a Saturday, so... Higher cost (67.00 + Hotel for a night) No big deal, but I want to keep the books straight!

I shopped til I dropped for a decent price for transfer to the train station and the train tickets! Some people must think we're nuts! Don't tell them! Somewhere in another post, someone mentioned contacting Pavel in Kiev. Well, these guys are cool (the one who suggested Pavel, and Pavel himself)! Transfer to and from train, tickets to and from Kerch in a private cabin, comes to 136 UK Pounds. Not bad at all. Not even near (in the right direction) my best price before that! So, I'm all set now. All transport is sorted out! There is a remote chance I may have to catch the train home a day earlier, I'm taking advice on this. The thinking is if the train was delayed in any way, I'd miss my flight home! There's a 7 hour buffer to play with, but Pavel is recommending a night in Kiev to make sure. I'm just waiting for the final word on this. No matter what way it goes, it should not affect the pricing too much. One night lost in Kerch is one gained in Kiev.

So, here's the updated breakdown so far;
Flight to England £67 return + Hotel there @ about £50
Flight to Kiev £199 return (special winter offer).
Apartment in Kerch £218.88 for 8 nights.
Trains & transfer £136 (includes spending the day with Pavel in Kiev)

= 670.88 UK + spends. That's about 1,159 US. I was aiming for doing the trip for about 1000 UK, so I don't think I'm too far off.

Spending money? I was thinking about 40UK per day, that's about 69US. I'll just have to hope it's enough. I've always got the good old plastic backup. Don't forget to contact your CC company and let them know you will be away!

[TheWongs]

Well, after all the nervous panic and mad things going on in my head about everything that could possibly go wrong with this trip, something happened today that totally changed my train of thought and got me thinking about why I am doing this! I got a letter... Not just any old letter... This was from "D" and it had a few sentences at the end that changed me and calmed my thoughts totally! I don't like to post letters, or parts of, but I think this is worthy!

" My dear Chris, please, take a warm jacket and a hat with you, as the weather can change. I don't want you to get cold.

I wish you a nice journey. I will meet you at the station. I am very excited!

With tenderness and kisses,

Your D*****"

Now, I don't know (or really care) if you think that's nothing. To me, it meant so, so much! It meant she cares!!!!

I'm off tomorrow, and I can't wait!

[TheWongs]

OK!... Its farewell to all you guys until I either return, post in Kiev on route, get married, mugged, or all of the above! Maybe I could post while I'm in Kerch? Mmmmm... I'm hoping I'll not have the time or inclination to post while I'm in Kerch! I've packed my bags, drunk lots of vodka (purely medicinal of course, for the flying).

I'm not worried about Ukraine and all it can do to me, cos I'm a big boy and can look after myself. I'm not even worried about meeting "D" now! I know when I step off that train in Kerch, she'll be there, with a big smile for me, even if it is a shy one! I also know she and I will be ok and we'll have fun, no matter what happens! If it turns out to be a great partnership, then bring it on! If not, then that's fine... At least we gave it a shot and had fun trying.

Today, I had another "uplifting" letter from my "D". At the end of her letter there was a PS... "PS My heart is beating faster. Please, remember I am a very shy person. ". After reading that, I'm ready for anything. It's so sweet and cute! I love those little details that tell me she actually wants me to be there! I want to hug her to death! If it means getting on a plane, then so be it!

So, oh so... It's off to Kerch I go! (think of the 7 dwarfs...)

I've my notepad, pen, passport, tickets, camera and myself. Right, I'm off... Byeeeee!!!......Oops! Forgot my suitcase! Silly me!

Missing you already!

Chris

[TheWongs]

3 weeks later....

Yes! It's me! Back to the land of fields and Guinness, from the land of potholes and bumps (and not just bumps on the road )!

If there's anyone reading this who likes the short version... You may want to go elsewhere! I was told to take a notepad and pen, so I did. The pad lasted 2 days, then I bought a bigger one! You've only yourselves to blame for telling me to write! What I did was write about my trip and I wrote about how I was feeling along the way. Was I supposed to write about the sights too? Oops!

Maybe this cr@p will bore a lot of you, but it's an honest description of what happened to me and how it made me feel...

[TheWongs]

Getting there....

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When I arrived at the airport in Belfast, I was remarkably calm, considering how much I hate flying. I haven't been in a plane since I returned home from a near disaster in Hong Kong in 1987! Now, I'm a bit thick sometimes and I can think of everything except the obvious! When I was in the departure lounge, it suddenly occurred to me that it would be a nice touch to take something from Ireland with me. Told you I was thick! The gift shop in this airport is rubbish! The only thing I managed to find was a couple of key rings in the shape of Ireland. I bought 2 anyway, just a token gesture for Galina at the agency and "D", so they'll do.

So, I'm sitting watching the tv in the departure lounge. I couldn't believe what they put on! A program about mans efforts to fly, including a lot of crashes! Typical Irish sense of humor! I walked up to the BAE 146 on the runway, examined it for cracks and rust, checked the landing gear was there (it was), then climbed aboard. It's a small plane, so I thought it would be the worst part of the trip. We took off. TheWongs has left the building!

Once in the air, I was fine. Hey guys!!! I can see my house from up here! I flew over Liverpool, waved at luckylucky (b@st@rd didn't wave back), and landed at Birmingham airport at about 9.00pm. I had 4.5 hours to kill, so started to look around for something to keep me amused. I had nothing better to do, so off I went to check in. I wanted to avoid the crowds, so I was at the desk before it opened. Lady at the desk was cool and said she would check me in anyway. Computer was down! Moved to a different desk... Computer was down! She made a few calls then told someone on the phone she would have to "switch to manual". This is airport tech-speak for "I have to write the boarding passes with a pen". She wasn't a happy bunny... Until she saw how many passengers there were... There was TWO people on the plane!!!... The International airport was empty! 

Found coffee and went for a walk. I also found a man walking around looking a bit like me. He's not getting away! I need someone to talk to! I started chatting to this bloke and the poor man had to wait til 8.00am before his flight. We found a bar and sat for a chat. It turned out this man was heading to meet his finance in Thailand! We chatted for a while, then they announced "would the only remaining passenger for flight VV264 please go to the departure lounge". Oops! Off I went. There was about 15 staff and 2 people, so we were well looked after. It became a running joke about us having our own private jet. I went to the duty free shop and bought a Gucci perfume for "D". I knew I'd be stepping off the train after 23 hours, so flowers would be impractical. I met the other passenger and we chatted.

I noticed he had flowers and gifts in a bag and thought "Mmmmmm... Same as me"?... He asked what was taking me to Kiev, so I told him. I thought this would make him feel more comfortable since we had something in common to talk about on the flight... Nope. He was a business man who owned factories and did a lot of dealing with Ukraine. The presents were for his staff there. There was an announcement "Would Mr M and Mr R please proceed to gate A. Your private jet is ready"! The airport came alive with the sound of laughter! On board, this beautiful Ukrainian stewardess said we could sit anywhere we wanted, so... Me being who I am, said "where are you sitting" She pointed to the seats where they sit for takeoff so I sat there! She smiled and said "but not there". Oh well, can't blame a man for trying! We took off, had a great laugh with the staff and the other passenger. We exchanged life stories and business cards as we landed in Kiev at 7.00am. The snow was everywhere! Holy sh!t, it's cold! We felt like a couple of rock stars, standing at the door of the plane, with crowds of staff waiting to "help" us...

We got onto the bus. The staff were very confused! 2 people? After the "short" ride to the terminal building, we walked into an empty room. Empty, apart from about 8 security staff scattered around. The other bloke had been here before, so I followed his lead and went to the stand, lifted the customs deceleration forms and started writing. He asked one of the security staff if anyone spoke English. This hot female said she spoke a little. He asked her what to fill in where is says destination. She said "where you are staying"! "I don't know where I'm staying. In a hotel" "I can't let you past until you provide the information"! During this, I was filling in my form, so knew I had to do that or there would be trouble. All I had was "D"s address, so I just put the postcode and Kerch, hoping for the best. After a long discussion, this bloke said his hotel was near some nightclub and told them the name. The staff chatted for a while and started naming hotels in that area. Hooray! They mentioned the name of one, he reacted so they told him what to write. My first impression was that they were strict and miserable, but it changed when I realized they were trying to help him, they just weren't smiling!

Then, it's of to customs. This "Thing" sat behind the glass with the sourest face I've ever seen! She scared the sh!t out of me. I'd rather fly! She just sat there, looking at us, then at her hands, then back to us again. I put my cases down. This is going to take some time. As soon as I put them down, she motioned for me to come over. Typical! I handed the papers and passport to her. She looked at them, then me, then them again. This seemed to take forever. Being my first time there, it was not a good experience. Eventually, she stamped the passport and let me in. On closer inspetion, I noticed a scrap of paper inside my passport. This must be the bit I read about! The scrap of paper you guard with your life! Next was the security check. I put the cases on the conveyor and handed another security man my passport. The guys at the x-ray machine chatted, laughed, then put it in reverse! I caught my bags before they hit the ground. He told me to replace them, so I did, but kept my hands on the handles. You only get to play with TheWongs once! He looked at me and smiled. I smiled back. He switched it on... The right direction this time! I went round to pick them up on the other side. The other bloke took a quick look at my passport and waved me through. I think they were just bored and wanted to play. It was cool. I walked out into the main building...

Welcome to Kiev!...

[TheWongs]

I walked out into the main building expecting a flood of taxi drivers to descend on me. Nope... There was a man standing with a board. On the board was my name. It was Pavel! I was very happy and relieved to see this man! We shook hands and he welcomed me to Ukraine. I liked this man as soon as I met him! There is nothing to dislike about Pavel! He grabbed one of my bags and led me outside to a car and driver that was waiting. We climbed aboard for my first experience of driving in Kiev. At first I thought... HELP! I want my mommy! Then.... Hang on a moment... This driver guy knows what he's doing! He was all over the road at a silly speed, but he was picking the best line on the road for avoiding the potholes! He did good! On the way, we stopped to pick up the drivers kids to drop them at school and Pavel changed some of my UK pounds. Kids dropped off, the driver took us to the train station. I have 12 hours to kill in Kiev, but Pavel recommended I leave my bags in the train stations "lockup" area. This is a room where you leave you bag and get a token to retrieve it later. I think it was about 12 Grivna.

Now all I had was my small case with the "valuables", so it was very light. He took me to the underground and introduced me to the way people get around this place. This was about 8.30 - 9.00am, so you can imagine the amount of people! Crazy!!!! We fought our way through a sea of bodies (some quite nice ones too) and I must say Pavel was a star! He kept checking I was ok and getting me in front of him so there would be no problems and he could see me at all times. I was wearing a jacket with zips on the pockets. All my money, passport etc was in my inside pocket and zipped. Everything else I was carrying was zipped into the others. Common sense is a wonderful thing... Use it!

We fought our way down to the platform and a train arrived within seconds. Picture this... Vertical sardines! Trying to get into a train is not for polite people. These dudes just walk all over you and through you! We squash ourselves into a carriage, with Pavel making sure we both get on the same one! A few stops later we pop out like corks into the city centre and Pavel takes me for a walk around. The whole experience was good fun! To be honest guys, I can't remember the names of where I went, but it was cool. Pavel took a couple of pics of me standing beside a few things, then off we went to his apartment.

Pavel's wife was making borsh, especially for me! We arrived at Pavel's apartment and I got my first opportunity to send some emails. His wife prepares dinner and we eat. I enjoyed the food very much! I think I'm going to like it here! After lunch, we sat down to watch "Forest Gump". I was sitting there watching the film, but my eyes wouldn't stay open! Pavel's wife thought this was a little amusing. I had been traveling for quite a few hours and hadn't thought of sleep! She is a very kind and lovely lady. They tucked me up on the sofa with a blanket and left me to sleep for a while. What seemed like 2 minutes later, Pavel came in to check his emails and told me it was nearly time to leave! I must have switched off like a light! The very fact I could fall asleep in this strange environment shows the trust I had for these people in a very short time! Would you fall asleep in a strangers house? I can't stress enough how much I like these two people!

So, it's off to the train station. On the way, we stopped at a shop and picked up some food and beer for my train ride. Back to the underground. Not nearly as bad now, so it was easy to get there. We even managed to get a seat! We went to the "lockup" and retrieved my bag, then up to the top floor of the train station for a coffee. I like the new section of this place. It's pretty cool and modern, with a massive water feature up the centre. I wanted to take a picture, but I also didn't want to look like a prat, taking a photo of a train station. I'm quite shy and self-conscious you know.  After our coffee, it was down to the platform to find my carriage. This carriage was being guarded by a big, very scary looking woman with more facial hair than I've ever had! I want my mommy again! Pavel showed her my ticket and had a chat with her. I think he said something like "you better look after this guy or I'll pluck your face". Maybe it was something nicer, but you get the picture. She smiled at me and I wanted my mommy again. Half her mouth was filled with gold teeth. I'd heard about these ladies, but never actually seen one! I'm making her sound bad, but she was very good to me. Once I said farewell to Pavel and settled down in my cabin, she came and offered coffee.

The cabin was about 6ft by 7ft long, with 4 bunks and a small table. Nothing fancy at all, but it would do me for 23 hours. I'm easy to please! I'm glad I booked the whole cabin because the thought of having to share that small space is scary. It's even more scary to think of sharing it with "Boris" the 7ft gay wrestler, who doesn't speak English and 2 of his "friends"! The other side of the coin could be thinking about sharing it with 3 25 year old nymphomaniacs who hate clothes! Life is a lottery my friends, life is a lottery... The train pulled away and TheWongs was off to Kerch!....

[TheWongs]

The train ride...

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This is for anyone thinking of going to Kerch, or to Simferopol on this train. I can only speak for my own experience, so I'm not saying all the trains are the same! After a few minutes, the big lady came to offer coffee and took my ticket. When she returned with the coffee, she brought sheets in a sealed plastic bag. 10 Grivna for the sheets and 2 for the coffee. I had a bad headache and a very sore ear from the plane landing in Kiev. I drunk about half of the tar... I mean... "coffee", then I sat, writing in my notebook and listening to Russian lessons on my portable CD player for a while. After about an hour, my headache and ear were much better. I swear it was the coffee, so I drunk the rest! Back to the Russian lessons and writing. I looked at my phone to check the time. 4 hours had passed! This isn't going to be such a bad journey after all. It was midnight already, so I locked my cabin and put my head down for a while. The train stops at a lot of stations on the way down. Sometimes they're adding or removing carriages (at least, that's what I think they were doing). You can always tell because there is nothing gentle about this operation! One time, I was standing up, arranging my "bed" when they attached a carriage. Don't stand up when they are doing this! The impact was enough to make me fly across the cabin and smack my head on the top bunk! Kids started crying and people were swearing (I think). The headache returns!... I slept, woke, eat, drank, listened to music, and then slept some more. The time passed without any problems. I found the people on board to be fine and friendly. I did take the precaution of locking my cabin when I was in it. The main reason was that I was sometimes drifting off to sleep and didn't know when it would happen! The toilets are quite disgusting and thankfully I only used them a few times. Do please remember the TP! I was glad to have it!

I noticed it took about 2 days for the after effects of the train to wear off. The after effects involve you thinking you're moving when you're not. It's no big deal. I found that when I closed my eyes, or stood very still, I felt like I was still on the train. Quite funny! It's amazing what 23 hours of moving side to side in a train can do to you...

[TheWongs]

Arrival and.... Meeting!

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I slept fairly well on the train so with about an hour to go, I started to prepare myself. I used the sink in the toilet to wash and shave, returned to my cabin an got changed. My heart was starting to beat faster with every turn of the wheels! I prepared myself as best I could under the circumstances. I did ok. I just finished getting my bags organized, everything put away when the train started to slow down and my cabin door knocked. The nice big lady said "Kerch"! My pulse must have been off the scale! I was shaking with excitement! Pull yourself together man!.... The train stopped and I made my way to the door. I looked out at a sea of faces. It looked like the whole of Kerch was at the station! It's not how I imagined it at all. I imagined "D" standing alone on the platform with her golden hair blowing in the wind. I would walk up to her, let my bags fall to the floor and hug her! Anyway, I looked across this sea of faces but could not see "D", or anyone who looked like her. I started to get a little worried, but put those thoughts out of my mind. Galina from the agency was going to be there with "D" to take us to my apartment and give me the key. I'm sure it was a great help for "D" too. As I'm looking across this sea, I see some very nice ladies. There is one who's image will be forever embedded in my mind! This gorgeous creature, standing alone. I was blown away by her! Some lucky bast.... ok... Maybe it's a good idea to put these thoughts away and concentrate on finding "D" and Galina? Ok... I brave the elements and descend to the platform. The steps of the train are narrow and steep. I remember thinking to myself "don't fall, don't fall don't fall"! I made it to the platform without a major incident or making a prat of myself. I managed to walk about 4 steps when a hand plunged through the crowd and grabbed my arm. It was Galina! She said "Krriss! Com vith me. "D" iz vaiting"! She led me through the crowd and off the platform. It was a lot quieter here. The gorgeous creature I saw from the train is standing not far in front of us and I have another look. WoW! She walks over to me and says "Hello Kriss". I nearly sh!t myself! Where's "D"? This lady's very cute, but I came here to meet my "D"! I don't want this one!... Go and get my..... Hang on.... That smile looks a little familiar!... The eyes?... Holy sh!t... It's my "D"!!!!!! TheWongs is in love! This lady's pictures make her look ugly compared to the real "D"! She put her hand out, we shook hands and looked into each others eyes. Deep Green eyes! Mmmmmm............. She asked me how my trip was as we walked to the taxi, so I said it was ok etc, etc. She has been studying English for 5 months and I must say she has worked hard! Not bad at all. Everything is looking great so far! We got into the taxi and Galina told the taxi driver where to go. On the way, "D" is quiet and shy. She did warn me she was a little shy, so Galina starts chatting to me, asking about Kiev etc. All the time, I was talking, I kept looking over at "D". She was stealing shy looks at me and smiling when I caught her doing it. Very cute indeed! It's a fair distance from the train station to the city centre and the roads are pretty rough. These guys are good drivers. They have to be to avoid the craters, pedestrians, busses and other cars that are driving on the wrong side of the road to avoid craters too! They don't waste any time either because time is money! We arrived at the apartment block about 15 minutes later and I paid the taxi driver 15 Grivna. These apartments all look alike in Ukraine, so there's not much to say about the appearance. Dark, miserable building... What else do you expect? Galina lead the way into the building and we climbed three flights of steps to get to my home for the next eight days. Was there pi$$ in the hall? No! Was there needles? No! Did it have a big steel door? Yes! But you couldn't see it because it was lined with nice wood panelling. It was a whole lot more than I was expecting. Quite clean really! She put the funny-looking key into the door and showed me how to lock/ unlock it. Turn the key 4 times. Not rocket science, I think I can handle it. We stepped inside the apartment and I was quite surprised with what I saw. It was like new! Nice layout, tasteful and modern. Electric water heater in the really cool bathroom that comes on once a day. It provides a tank of hot water. Very happy Wong! "D" took off her coat and Galina asked what I thought... Bad question! There is no way in hell I was going to be honest answering that one when I saw "D" in a tight skirt and tight woollen sweater! Holy mother of god! What a shape! I had only seen three pictures of "D" in the five months of writing. None of them showed her shape. I did some trolling around the sites, looking for ladies of the same height/ weight ratio, just to have some idea of what to expect. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw! Get the picture?... Good! I gave Galina and "D" the Irish key rings, then gave "D" the Gucci perfume. She was thrilled with it and said I had good taste! Galina thanked me, handed me the key, said her goodbye's and left. It was just the two of us, at last! We did the shoes thing and went into the living/ bedroom and sat down. We had a short discussion about Kiev and the train. Her English is very good considering the short time she's been learning, but not great, so I pulled it out... Not that!!! My translator you perverts! She asked if I needed anything and suggested we go to the shop before it closed at 10.00pm. It was 9.00pm, so I told her I needed a quick shower and she could play with it for a few minutes (the freaking translator!). I showed her the basics of operation and figured she could work the rest out. She was happy with this arrangement, so off I went. I returned and she was watching tv. She didn't like the translator at all, but had her own book and knew how to find the words faster, so everything was cool. She asked what I needed at the shop, so we made a list of the basics for survival... Coffee! I also needed stuff for breakfast, so off we went. I was happy to see there was a shopping centre just round the corner, so the walk was quite short. While we were walking, I asked why it was so quiet. She said "because it is not safe to be out at night". GULP! What in the name of f**k are we doing out then? That's what I thought, not what I said. What I did say was "you'll be ok with me". It was fine. We went to the shop, got the stuff and returned to the apartment. No problems. As I opened the door, I thought to myself "I'm sure I left the light on". I had left the light on!... No power! "D" threw her hands in the air, smiled and said those famous words... "This is Ukraine"! I laughed my a$$ off. I've read that so many times on this board! "D" sprung into action like a Ninja! She found a candle, lit it and the problem was solved! I got out my portable cd player and placed the headphones in a bucket. "D" laughed and said "that is what we do with clock to get awake in mornings". We listened to some cd's I brought for her. I tried to get the conversation going, but she was fairly quiet. I had to try to keep the conversation going and it was a little difficult at times. I showed her some pictures I'd brought of Ireland, my kids and that freaking dog. She was looking at her watch, so I asked if she had to go. She said her last bus leaves very soon and she had to get up for work in the morning. I told her not to worry about the bus, I'll get her a taxi. No way! She will not hear of it! I finally agree to let her go. I wasn't going to start an argument on our first night! She put her coat and shoes on and ran to catch her bus. On the way out she said she finishes work at 2.00pm and will be here at 3.00pm. I watched from the apartment balcony as she ran to the bus stop. The bus arrived within seconds. Oh well... Nothing to do and I've done some serious traveling, so it's time for bed..... I dream about "D" and the things we'll do tomorrow. I can't wait til 3.00! I'm happy here already and don't care about the lack of electricity... I slept like a baby! ........

[TheWongs]

Arrival and.... Meeting!

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I slept fairly well on the train so with about an hour to go, I started to prepare myself. I used the sink in the toilet to wash and shave, returned to my cabin and got changed. My heart was starting to beat faster with every turn of the wheels! I prepared myself as best I could under the circumstances. I did ok. I just finished getting my bags organized, everything put away when the train started to slow down and my cabin door knocked. The nice big lady said "Kerch"! My pulse must have been off the scale! I was shaking with excitement! Pull yourself together man!....

The train stopped and I made my way to the door. I looked out at a sea of faces. It looked like the whole of Kerch was at the station! It's not how I imagined it at all. I imagined "D" standing alone on the platform with her golden hair blowing in the wind. I would walk up to her, let my bags fall to the floor, kiss and hug her! Anyway, I looked across this sea of faces but could not see "D", or anyone who looked like her. I started to get a little worried, but put those thoughts out of my mind. Galina from the agency was going to be there with "D" to take us to my apartment and give me the key. I'm sure it was a great help for "D" too.

As I'm looking across this sea, I see some very nice ladies. There is one who's image will be forever embedded in my mind! This gorgeous creature, standing alone. I was blown away by her! Some lucky bast.... ok... Maybe it's a good idea to put these thoughts away and concentrate on finding "D" and Galina? Ok... I brave the elements and descend to the platform. The steps of the train are narrow and steep. I remember thinking to myself "don't fall, don't fall don't fall"! I made it to the platform without a major incident or making a prat of myself. I managed to walk about 4 steps when a hand plunged through the crowd and grabbed my arm. It was Galina! She said "Krriss! Com vith me. "D" iz vaiting"!

She led me through the crowd and off the platform. It was a lot quieter here. The gorgeous creature I saw from the train is standing not far in front of us and I have another look. WoW! What a beautiful woman! She walks over to me and says "Hello Kriss". I nearly sh!t myself! Where's "D"? This lady's very cute, but I came here to meet my "D"! I don't want this one!... Go and get my..... Hang on.... That smile looks a little familiar!... The eyes?... Holy sh!t... It's my "D"!!!!!! TheWongs is in love! This lady's pictures make her look ugly compared to the real "D"! She put her hand out, we shook hands and looked into each others eyes. Deep Green eyes! Mmmmmm.............

She asked me how my trip was as we walked to the taxi, so I said it was ok etc, etc. She has been studying English for 5 months and I must say she has worked hard! Not bad at all. Everything is looking great so far! We got into the taxi and Galina told the taxi driver where to go. On the way, "D" is quiet and shy. She did warn me she was a little shy, so Galina starts chatting to me, asking about Kiev etc. All the time, I was talking, I kept looking over at "D". She was stealing shy looks at me and smiling when I caught her doing it. Very cute indeed!

It's a fair distance from the train station to the city centre and the roads are pretty rough. These guys are good drivers. They have to be to avoid the craters, pedestrians, busses and other cars that are driving on the wrong side of the road to avoid craters too! They don't waste any time either because time is money! We arrived at the apartment block about 15 minutes later and I paid the taxi driver 15 Grivna. These apartments all look alike in Ukraine, so there's not much to say about the appearance. Dark, miserable building... What else do you expect? Galina lead the way into the building and we climbed three flights of steps to get to my home for the next eight days. Was there pi$$ in the hall? No! Was there needles? No! Did it have a big steel door? Yes! But you couldn't see it because it was lined with nice wood panelling. It was a whole lot more than I was expecting. Quite clean really! She put the funny-looking key into the door and showed me how to lock/ unlock it. Turn the key 4 times. Not rocket science, I think I can handle it.

We stepped inside the apartment and I was quite surprised with what I saw. It was like new! Nice layout, tasteful and modern. Electric water heater in the really cool bathroom that comes on once a day. It provides a tank of hot water. Very happy Wong! "D" took off her coat and Galina asked what I thought... Bad question! There is no way in hell I was going to be honest answering that one when I saw "D" in a tight skirt and tight woollen sweater! Holy mother of god! What a shape! I had only seen three pictures of "D" in the five months of writing. None of them showed her shape. I even did some trolling around sites, looking for ladies of the same height / weight ratio, just to have some idea of what to expect. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw! Get the picture?... Good!

I gave Galina and "D" the Irish key rings, then gave "D" the Gucci perfume. She was thrilled with it and said I had good taste! Galina thanked me, handed me the key, said her goodbye's and left. It was just the two of us, at last! We did the shoes thing and went into the living / bedroom and sat down. We had a short discussion about Kiev and the train. Her English is very good considering the short time she's been learning, but not great, so I pulled it out... Not that!!! My translator you perverts! She asked if I needed anything and suggested we go to the shop before it closed at 10.00pm. It was 9.00pm, so I told her I needed a quick shower and she could play with it for a few minutes (the translator you perverts!). I showed her the basics of operation and figured she could work the rest out. She was happy with this arrangement, so off I went.

I returned and she was watching tv. She didn't like the translator at all, but had her own book and knew how to find the words faster, so everything was cool. She asked what I needed at the shop, so we made a list of the basics for survival... Coffee! I also needed stuff for breakfast, so off we went. I was happy to see there was a shopping centre just round the corner, so the walk was quite short. While we were walking, I asked why it was so quiet. She said "because it is not safe to be out at night". GULP! What in the name of f**k are we doing out then? That's what I thought, not what I said. What I did say was "you'll be ok with me". It was fine. I'm Irish, so what dangers could possibly be there that I havn't already seen? We got to the shop, got the stuff and returned to the apartment. No problems.

As I opened the door, I thought to myself "I'm sure I left the light on". I had left the light on!... No power! "D" threw her hands in the air, smiled and said those famous words... "This is Ukraine"! I laughed my a$$ off! I've read that so many times on this board! "D" sprung into action like a Ninja! She found a candle, lit it and the problem was solved! I got out my portable cd player and placed the headphones in a bucket. "D" laughed and said "that is what we do with clock to get awake in mornings". We listened to some cd's I brought for her. I tried to get the conversation going, but she was fairly quiet. I had to try to keep the conversation going but it was a little difficult at times.

I showed her some pictures I'd brought of Ireland, my kids and that freaking dog. She was looking at her watch, so I asked if she had to go. She said her last bus leaves very soon and she had to get up for work in the morning. I told her not to worry about the bus, I'll get her a taxi. No way! She will not hear of it! I finally agree to let her go. I wasn't going to start an argument on our first night! She put her coat and shoes on and ran to catch her bus. On the way out she said she finishes work at 2.00pm and will be here at 3.00pm. I watched from the apartment balcony as she ran to the bus stop. The bus arrived within seconds. Oh well... Nothing to do and I've done some serious traveling, so it's time for bed..... I dream about "D" and the things we'll do tomorrow. I can't wait til 3.00! I'm happy here already and don't care about the lack of electricity... I slept like a baby! ........

[TheWongs]

Friday - First full day

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I woke early the next morning and felt like a new man (not literally). I showered, dressed, had breakfast and thought about the afternoon. There was still no power and I was glad I bought muesli, milk and pure orange. It was almost as if I had planned for having no power. Something to plan for next time! Where could we go and what could we do? I thought it would be nice to go for a walk, then for a meal. At least it would help to get some conversation flowing if "D" was showing me around Kerch. With my sense of fun and adventure, it has to be a good way to "break the ice". There was a gentle tapping at my door at 9.30. It was Galina. She said my doorbell wasn't working and I told her it was the lack of electricity. She made a few calls and told me she would try to have the problem sorted. She said she would show me Kerch. Cool!

Off we went. The apartment was a fair distance from the centre, but not too bad. We walked and talked during the 15 minute walk. I instantly liked this lady. She seemed very kind and honest. While we were walking, I noticed she was carrying some bags, so I offered to carry them for her. She said "You are a good and very kind man". As we walked, she was pointing out the buildings and telling me what they were. She pointed to a large building and told me it was a fish university. I replied "Is this why the fish are so intelligent in Ukraine"? I could tell by her blank look and friendly smile that she didn't get it, so I pulled out my trusty translator and typed the word intelligent. I explained again and pointed at the translator. She went into a fit of laughter! I see the lady has a sense of humor. This is going to be a good day.

We walked along the sea front and she was telling me about the three ports in Kerch. Each port does different things. It's a lot bigger than I thought it would be. She asks if I had breakfast and I explained I had, but could not have coffee because no power. Ok... To the house of tea! On the way she told me she had to meet her best friend, so she phoned her and told her to meet us there. I ordered coffee and she ordered tea. The coffee comes in a tiny cup, but the tea comes in a jug!  This place is very nice and is well worth a visit if you go to Kerch. She took a few pictures of me with my camera in here, but I look like sh!t, so I'm not showing them to you!

Her friend arrives and they sit chatting in Russian for a few minutes. I was introduced to "L" who has a smile that lights up the world! I instantly liked this lady. All she needed to do was look at me to make me feel happy. She is a little large, so not my type, but she makes up for it with the beautiful smile and shining eyes. Galina explained that she had to go back to work and "L" would show me some more of the town. Fine by me, but does she speak English? She does!

We all left the house of tea together and Galina took a picture of "L" and myself standing outside. I may post this, although I still look like sh!t. I must explain to you guys that I had not dressed to meet people today. I threw on some crappy jeans and stuff to be comfortable. Galina headed off to work and "L" started to show me the fish university again. I did the same as I did with Galina and she laughed even harder. Easy to please these ladies! She learnt her English at school and says she's forgotten most of it, but we had no problem chatting at all! I showed her my translator and she thought it was cool. She called it my notebook. Every time there was a word she was stuck with, she said "notbook! Notbook"! She asked if there was anything I needed. The only thing I needed was money changed, so off to the bank we went. Nyet! Don't change UK pounds. Next bank... Nyet!... This went on until we covered all the banks in Kerch! We were walking, laughing and being quite funny until she made a phone call and said "you have a serious problem. The nearest place to change your money is Simferopol"! My sense of humor left me at this point and she could see it in my face. Her face changed suddenly, from this happy, cheerful lady, into a very serious lady. I had enough to get to Simferopol and I had my plastic for emergency, so it was no real panic, more of a big pain in the a$$.

As we were walking, she suddenly changed direction, said "com vis me" and headed up a small street. She led my into a small, dark bar, told me to wait and started talking to a bloke sitting in the corner. A few minutes later, she came back and said he will give me 150 Grivna for a 20 pound note. So, the deal was done and I had cash. We went for lunch and I couldn't understand the menu, so said "you choose". We had soup and vodka (not mixed). When it was served, I watched as she picked up a spoon and started polishing it with a napkin. I reached for the other spoon to do the same and she said "No. This one is for you". She asked how old I was and I told her to guess. "37, maybe 38"? I like this lady! She was blown away when I told her about my 26 year old son, my 24 year old daughter and their 2 year old babies! She asked where I was staying. Oops! I don't know. I forgot! Up that road somewhere? I got a little worried, so pulled out my mobile to ask Galina, but before I could dial she put her hand on mine, smiled, winked with both eyes and said "I kid vis you. I know vere you apartment" we walked back laughing and joking. It's 1 - 0 to Ukraine, but I'll get her back! On the way, I was thinking about the spoon thing. Maybe she knows nothing about "D" and is trying to hit on me? I remember the words on a forum... "When a RW likes you, you know it"!..... Guys... I know it!

This isn't fair to this wonderful lady, so I explained the whole story about writing to "D" for 5 months etc, etc. I just wanted to make it clear to her why I was here and she was cool with it. At the apartment and still no power. She gave me her mobile number, insisted on testing it and left, telling me to SMS if I need anything. What a wonderful lady!

3.00 came and went. No "D"! 3.30, no "D. 3.45 the door knocked and it was "D" wearing a big smile. A different lady. I could sense a change in her attitude. She took off her coat to reveal a tight sweater and a pair of sprayed on jeans! Oh... My... God!!! She then put her hand into her bag and pulled out a handfull of pictures. We sat down and she showed them to me. As I was holding each picture, she would point to it, explaining where, who etc, sometimes resting her hand on mine. This is more like it!

There was still no power, so she phoned Galina. "Pack your bags, you're moving somewhere else". 10 minutes later Galina's husband arrived in a taxi and we moved. This apartment was a little older, but just as nice as the first. It also had power!  When we were settled in, "D" asked how my day was, so I told her all about it, and how Galina had to go to work, but her friend showed me some of the town. I explained about the problem getting money changed here, but told her it would be ok when we go bowling in Simferopol. She said "I can not go bowling. I have work"! Hold the boat! "you told me we would go there to play bowls. It's the weekend". "No. I have to work". "You mean every day I'm here? Even Sunday"? "Yes". Fu**ing great! "Oh well, if you gotta work, you gotta work. What do you want to do? Go for dinner"? "Not hungry". "Go for a walk? You could show me some sights". "No. Tired after work, but you must eat something. What do you want"? I remembered one of her letters talking about a new pizza place, so I said "Pizza". "We don't need to go out for that. I'll order it to be delivered".

20 minutes later, we had pizza and beer. She turned on the tv and we sat for a while. I cracked a few jokes, told a few stories from home etc. She was cheerful enough and we had a few laughs. I was looking at the tv when I noticed her playing with her mobile phone. I looked at her and she was pointing it at me. She clicked and took my picture with a cheeky grin. A few moments later, she showed it to me, set as the background image! She then took the key ring from Ireland out of her bag and showed it to me... With her apartment keys on it! I started to relax a little and started to think her only problem was shyness.

At 9.00pm she said "I must go home now. Work in the morning". What?????!!!!! She put on her coat and shoes and said "I will try to get here early tomorrow". I thought "at least we may get to do something". We say goodbye and she goes home. I couldn't stop thinking about all the promises she made about us having fun and how she would make me a romantic dinner. All the nice things that we discussed over 5 months. Tonight was better and there seemed to be some progress made. If she didn't like me, she wouldn't come, or she would at least tell Galina... Wouldn't she?

Something's still not quite right. Tomorrow may be better. Who knows?....

[TheWongs]

Saturday...

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Early hours of Saturday morning and I'm lying wide awake, wondering what's going on. She told me she would be working til 2.00pm, but when she left, she said "I don't know when I will finish. I'll SMS you". She took my mobile number, but never bothered testing it. I'm starting to feel like a prat. Am I being taken for a ride? It looks like she wants to spend the minimum amount of time with me. Maybe she thinks she has to spend time with me because I made the effort to come to see her? Why did she not tell me before I left about her having to work? Maybe she genuinely is very pi$$ed at having to work and this is adding to her embarrassment? I sit there frying my brain, texting luckylucky and not a very happy bunny! 

I said if things didn't work with this lady, I'd still have a good time. That's not looking very promising at the moment! Luckylucky phoned me and I was very glad to hear from him! He managed to help me to wind down and we decided on two possibilities. 1# She didn't like me and felt guilty, so was spending some time with me. 2# She liked me, but was very shy and having to work was making things worse. When I was telling him my story, there was something about it that rang a bell... Donaz's story! The "Noooooo!" part of his story got to me. I asked lucky to send don an email asking him to contact me. I need answers! Either one suits me fine. If she doesn't like me, then I'll move on and enjoy myself. Maybe meet some more ladies, go out and see what the town has to offer for night entertainment. It's the not knowing that's hurting!

Donaz phoned! Good to hear his voice too! I explained the situation and he was in agreement. Sounds like shyness is the problem. I'm going to fix that today! I can't thank these guys enough! Two of the best people I know! Now I need a plan...

Today is "D Day" (Dinner Day)! I will enlist the help of "L" to go shopping. I'm not bad with the pasta, so I'll cook us dinner. She likes sweet red wine and chocolates, so she's getting the works! Candles and all! The plan is set and I drifted off to sleep at about 5.00am... I woke up at 8.30 and sent a text to "D" saying "Have a good day at work. Thinking of you. Chris". Next was a text to "L" asking if she wanted a coffee. I knew her smile would cheer me up too! She replied with "I have a problem. I can meet you at 1.00pm"! Oh sh!t! That's not giving me much time, but it may still work. "L" sends another text "Do you need money? I will change for you". Great! We arrange to meet in the town centre at 1.00pm so I get myself ready and go for a walk around Kerch.

To be honest, I don't remember what I saw because my mind was not working in "tourist mode". I was outside the bank when I spotted "L" walking up the road. I started to run towards her with my arms out straight, just like the movies. She did the same, but when we were about to embrace, I changed direction and hugged a lamp post! She was in pieces with laughter! She said "28"! "What"? "I said yesterday you looked 38. Now 28"! Funny lady. I explained the plan, changed some money and we went for lunch. She polished my spoon, smiled lots and made me feel happy again. She compared me to a Turkish man with 4 wives. When I asked why and who, she said Galina, "D" and her! I looked around the restaurant, said I needed the fourth and called the waitress (who was very hot by the way). "L" nearly had kittens as the waitress approached! She went white! I ordered some vodka while she laughed and shook her head with a twinkle in her eye. I knew I'd get her back! It's one each now! I have some good fun with this lady!

We finished and went shopping. I got all the stuff I needed and we walked back. It was nearly 3.00! While we were walking I told her how much I appreciated her help. I could do nothing without her. She said I was a very good man, she likes me very much and she is happy to help. As we approached the apartment, "D" was standing outside texting on her phone! "L" said "I will go other way", and crossed the road. I thanked her and told her I'd contact her later. I really do love this woman! She is so understanding and considerate! I walked up to "D" and said "Hi! Did you get my text this morning"? "No". Of course she didn't because she gave me the wrong number! Fat Yuri probably got it and had a great day at work!

We went inside and I told her she was not allowed in the kitchen. She watched tv for about 30 seconds before barging in to see what was happening. "Go away. I'm making you dinner. You have been at work all day"! Not having any of it! She looks at the ingredients, decides what it is I'm making and told me to sit down and have a beer! "Vee need ekks" "What"? "ekks". "What"? "Ekks! From a chikin"! "she puts her coat on, gives me orders to cook the pasta, and runs to the shop. So much for my cool plan! She returns and gets to work. I use the opportunity to take a picture. As I click the camera, she turns to look at me with a smile. The picture ended up a little fuzzy, but it's nice. If you are good boys, I'll post it. The dinner was excellent! Maybe it was a good thing that she took over the kitchen? We sat and I had beer, she had wine and told me it was a very sweet thing for me to think of her. She smiled sweetly and we moved to the living room. The TV was switched on and all was good in the world. I gave her a box of chocolates and sat beside her. After a short time, I decided it was time to see if this shyness thing is going to go away. I grabbed her hand and stroked it while smiling at her, then placed it in my hand, then put my hand on my lap. She smiled and relaxed. A few minutes later, I jumped up, grabbed my camera, put the timer on and set it on the TV. 10 seconds later, we had a picture! I AM going to post this picture for all you guys, but not just yet. There is a reason for not showing the photo and all will be clear when I do.

I sat down beside her again and placed my hand on my lap, palm up and fingers spread. I looked at her, then she got the message and put her hand into mine. I felt like a trainer who just taught a new trick, but I also felt like we were getting somewhere! 8.30 and she says she has to go! WHHHAAAATTTTT???????? She said she was tired and to be fair, she did look a little tired. She got up and put her coat on. I said "D. If you do not want to see me, then I do not want you to come here". She looked me straight in the eyes and said "Kriss (I love that!) I understand! I will come early tomorrow. Ok"? She said goodbye and left me feeling pi$$ed off and angry! I drank the rest of her wine and finished the beers. I have now started smoking again! 6 months of not smoking and three days in Kerch. F**king great! I went to bed not happy.......

[TheWongs]

Sunday...

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Up at 7.30 and the first thing is a text to "D" to wish her a good day. We sorted the numbers out last night and tested them! I sent about 8 to "L" and tried to ring her 3 times... No answer. I started to get very worried about her! There's nothing I can do, so I go for a walk to get my head together. At 11.45 "L" sends me a text. "good morning my darling". Good morning? I'll give you good freaking morning! I've been worried sick! I phoned her and told her I was walking around Kerch worrying about two women now! She laughed and explained she had left her phone at home when she went to sort some problems out with one of her apartments. She owns three apartments in Kerch, rents two and lives in the other. She was flattered that I was worried and said she was busy, but could come to my place at 3.00pm. No good, "D" will be there, so she says to call her when "D" leaves.

I walk back home, put the kettle on and make coffee. Doorbell rings at 12.00 and it's Galina's husband, just to check I'm ok and to bring me some things I left behind in the other place. Nice guy! 12.30 the doorbell again! I'm a popular boy today. It's "L". She explains that she has to go back to work so she could only spend a short time with me. She changes some more money for me and we arrange to go to Simferopol tomorrow. I need to get my money thing sorted. "L" keeps changing it for me, but I feel bad because this lady is babysitting a dumb tourist and having to do everything for me! The plan is to go there early, spend the day looking around, get my money changed and come back in the evening. Suits me, but it means I'll not be able to see "D" on Monday. After talking for a short time it turns out she walked over a mile from her work to help me! I feel really bad about the trouble I'm causing her and I tell her to stop going out of her way for me. I'm a big boy now! She gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and tells me to call her later.

"D" said she would be early, so I jump into the shower and get ready. I'm sitting watching TV at 2.00pm, waiting for her. I'm still sitting watching TV at 4.45pm when she arrives! She asked what I did today and I replied "Nothing. I was waiting for you because you said you'd be here early". No reply, sorry, nothing! "Have you eaten today"? "No". "You must eat something. What do you want"? "I want us to go out for a meal". "I'm not hungry, but there is a shop close, so I will cook for you". I get the feeling she does not want to be seen in public with me! Surely I'm not that bad? She saw about 30 pictures of me over the last 5 months! I have a list of things I need, so it's ok. At least I can get them. She goes into the kitchen and looks to see what I have. We decide on fried eggs and sausage with some salad. I grab my list and we head to the shops.

We walk down the steps of the apartment and she is ahead of me. The outside door has a strong spring to keep it closed, so she pushes it wide open and lets it go as I'm walking through! Good start! Luckily, I'm fairly quick, so I managed to block it from doing any damage to myself. She looks at me and starts to walk to the shop. This is the second time we've walked together since I arrived! The first time was to a shop around the corner too! We arrived at the shop and she asks what I need. I go through the list. Washing powder for my clothes, stuff for my cracked lips, pain killers for my freaking head etc, etc. She walks around the shop and it has most of what I need. She then goes to the meat counter, talks to the lady serving, tells me we are leaving and goes outside! "What was the problem"? "I don't like her selection! There's another shop". We walk to the other shop and up to the meat counter. She buys some sausages and walks out of the shop. What about my freaking list? I need milk for my breakfast! Oh hell, I am past caring now!

She cooks the dinner and I try to be friendly and nice. Something about me... I'm consistently nice! As she is cooking, her attitude drops and she starts to chat again. After the meal we go into the living room and she takes up her position in front of the tv. I explain the situation about going to Simferopol tomorrow and ask her if she can come instead of "L". "No, I'm working". "Well I have to go, so I don't know what time I'll be back. If it's early, I'll ring you". She is ok with this (as expected) and she relaxes and cheers up a little. I'm thinking maybe she had a bad day? Ok! Now I'm going to test the water! I move her handbag from between us, put my arm around her and pull her towards me. I get her comfortable in my arms and tell her to relax and watch tv. She smiles sweetly at me and does not move. After about 2 minutes of holding this log, I give up, get up and got to the kitchen for a beer. I return and sit in my "usual" spot.

While we are watching TV, something funny sprang into my head... On another post here, someone compared Donaz's wife Yulia to Tigger. "Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy". If "D" was in the Tigger movie, she would play the part of Eeyore!

7.45 arrives, she stretches and says "I must go home now". I didn't miss a beat! I jumped up and said "OK"! She pulled back with shock! I went to the hall and lifted her coat. She was still sitting there looking shocked, but then she got up slowly and walked over to me casually. I could see it in her eyes that I rattled her cage! I helped her to put her coat on and as she is putting on her shoes, I opened the front door. She turned to face me and I said nothing. "Maybe you will SMS me tomorrow"? I opened the door further and said "Maybe. Goodbye". As she is turning towards the door I said "Do I get a hug"? She spun round quickly and hugged me. I kissed her on the cheek and said "Goodbye D". The door was closed as soon as she stepped out. "D" is history!

I've been a little hard on "D" in this post, but that's just my anger. She is a very beautiful lady with some very nice qualities. It seems we were not as compatible as she led me to believe in her letters.

I phoned "L" and she came to see me at 10.15. She brought pain killers, because she knew I had a headache earlier... "D" also knew I had a headache! She also brought me some cigarettes because she noticed I only had about 6 in my packet. This is the sort of lady I want in my life! Someone who gives a sh!t about me and wants to help!

Ok... I've had my little rant, so I'll continue... "L" stayed for 15 minutes. During that time, she told me that Galina had phoned her and told her I could not to to Simferopol unless it was through her agency. I was livid! I can go where and with who I want! Then she explained why... Apparently, Galina is responsible for me because it's her address on the forms I filled in at customs. Fair enough. I start to cool down, then it hits me! How did Galina know we were going to Simferopol?

"L" tells me that "D" phoned Galina as soon as she left me! Why would she do that? Now I'm pi$$ed! I'm going to the office in the morning. I want some freaking answers! "L" calms me down, makes me coffee, feeds me pain killers and has to go. "I will come in the morning". Don't get me wrong guys. I wasn't jumping around cursing. I remained polite and nice. All the above is what I was thinking, not saying. "L" could read me like a book and knew what I was thinking! When I gathered my thoughts, I decided to go to see Galina in the morning and maybe meet some other ladies. Why not?

Now TheWongs is gonna have some much deserved fun!.....

[TheWongs]

Monday...

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My wittle head was going nuts in the middle of the night again! Was this agency a scam? Were they getting ladies to tempt suckers like me to come here? Can't be! I've a great apartment at a good price and I've spent virtually nothing. There is no reason to suspect that! "D" couldn't afford a phone card yesterday, yet she was able to write to me every day for 5 months and tell me not to worry about the cost? No answer for that one, unless she's paying by the month when she gets paid? I don't know. Do I care now?

I got little sleep again, but managed some. I got myself up, showered and ready to go see Galina at the office. Forgot to get food for breakfast, but that was the last thing on my mind. I'll get something later. I was finishing my coffee when the doorbell rang. Strange... I'm not expecting anyone. It's "L". She tells me she has taken the day off work and has a full day planned for me!

What about the office? Aww, to hell with the office. I need some fun! Lets go!

We walked to the bus station and bought tickets to Feodosiya. There was time for breakfast, so we went into the new restaurant at the bus station. This is a cool place! I had a very nice breakfast for about 6 Grivna in a very nice environment, with nice staff. Go there!  We went to the bus and hit the road. As we were driving along, "L" looked at me a few times. I'm looking into space, but I "feel" her looking. I turned and looked into her eyes. She said "vot you think-ink"? I said "you don't want to know"! She held my hand and smiled. The smile made me feel a hundred times better! She knew everything that's happened to me since that first day and she genuinely cared. It's a long bus ride, so it was about lunchtime when we arrived. She checked when we could get the next bus and we had time for lunch. Beside the main bus terminal in Feodosiya, there's is some shops and cafes. As we were heading towards a cafe, she went into another shop, so I followed. She talked to the assistant, asked me for 2 Grivna and handed me a stick of stuff for my lips. Cool, considerate lady indeed!

We had a very nice lunch, laced with good old fashioned vodka. During the meal, she looked into my eyes for a long time and said "vot you think-ink"? I looked back into hers and said "you don't need to ask. You know"! She smiled broadly and winked both eyes at me. I think she was downloading the latest information from my head when she looked into my eyes! We finished and got another bus to Koktebel. When we arrived, we walked down to the sea. She tells me this place is a mass of people in the summer, but it's almost deserted at this time of year. A real summer place. People come from all over to stay. On the way back we saw a bowling ally and it was open, so it's Ireland v Ukraine! She told me she has played a few times and I've played once, so she has the advantage... Or does she? Not many strikes were being made, but I was kicking her a$$.  We decided to make it more interesting and said if anyone gets 3 strikes in any game, the other has to buy a bottle of champagne.

No champagne was had that day! We headed back to the bus and back to Feodosiya. Had a pizza there and decided not to bother with the bus and just get a taxi back to Kerch. In Kerch we did some shopping, bought a bottle of vodka and returned to my place. No electric! "This is Ukraine" I shouted with my hands in the air. We laughed, I got the candle lit and poured the vodka. I can safely say this has been the best day of my trip so far! "L" phoned Galina and broke the news to her about the power. "You are moving back to the other place. Pick up Galina at her house on the way". We packed my stuff and ordered a taxi. We picked up Galina and things got interesting... Galina asked how I was getting on with "D", so I gave her the straight answer, adding that she knew how we were getting on because "D" phoned her to tell her about me going to Simferopol! This shocked her! She said "D" phoned to tell her I was going there, but nothing about us. Galina had asked "D" and she said we were great and she had spent the weekend with me! 

Well... I put the story straight for the lady and told her everything. She was under the impression we were going out, having meals and doing things! Who told her that croc? I moved back to my original apartment, had a laugh about the situation and she left. Before she left she told me in all her years, there has never been anyone who has had to move apartments twice and she was impressed with the way I handled it with smiles and laughter. I said "I'm Irish. That how we handle things"! "L" and I had a few vodka's. She looked at me with that big smile and I smiled back. She told me how my smile made her feel happy inside and this is why she wanted to help me. She wanted to see me happy so I would smile for her! She said I now had three wives in Kerch. Galina, "D" and her! I replied by saying it wasn't fair... They would have to find more wives! I then added that Galina was married, "D" was history, so that left only one. I know what she means by a smile making you want to make someone happy. Hers did the same for me! She is such a sweet, sweet lady! Before she left, I got directions to Galina's office for the following morning...

[TheWongs]

Tuesday...

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I prepared for the long walk across town to Galina's office. I had plenty of time because "L" was working til about 3.00pm. I took my time and enjoyed the walk. It took about 30 mins and I saw some more of the town. I like this place! The town centre is in good condition judging by the standards I'd seen so far.

I arrived at the apartment block where the office is. This place was more like the ones I've read about here. Was there pi$$ in the hall? Yes! was it dirty and miserable? Yes! Was there needles lying on the stairway? No! I can only assume they have not yet discovered the pleasures of a rusty needle here.

I walked up to the 3rd floor and rang the bell. This beautiful lady opened the door and I said "Galina"? She turned and called her. Galina appeared and seemed to be genuinely happy to see me. She welcomed me in and made some tea. We chatted about how I was getting on and made small talk, but she knew why I was here and the conversation turned to "D". She told me I should have contacted her earlier if there was a problem and I replied that "D" knew there was a problem before she phoned her on Sunday. She conceded this and phoned "D". After a few minutes on the phone, she asked me to go into another room with her. There was a sofa and a table and chairs. I sat at the table and Galina called one of the girls from the "main" working area. This girl was stunning! She was a translator and her English was better than mine, but that's not saying much!  Galina's English isn't the best and she wanted to make sure I got the message correctly. She chatted to the interpreter for a few moments and sat back.

The interpreter then told me the score... "D" had told her that when we met, there was no chemistry! Why the f**k did she not say so before? Galina then told me I should have told her earlier again! I was getting a little wound up by this and explained it again to the translator, adding that if I had known sooner there would never have been a problem. This messing about has wasted four days! That's what makes me angry and not "D" feeling no chemistry! There was a short conversation and Galina got the message. She asked if I wanted to meet someone else and I replied by saying there was no point with me only having two days left. She talked me into it and I thought "what the hell". We went to the main area, sat at a computer and looked at some profiles. While I was looking I thought "Mmmmmm... Another introduction fee"? Maybe this is why she wanted to help? Oh, what the hell. Go for it!

I narrowed my search to three ladies. All three were very nice indeed, but nothing spectacular. They were all between 35 and 40. I wanted to meet a real lady! I asked if they spoke English and this narrowed it down to two. She showed me more pictures of them both and I made a choice... "E"! Jet black hair, Green eyes and 5'7", 1" shorter than me. Galina phoned her, chatted and hung up. "She can meet you at 4.30 for a short time. She works night shift at a steel plant and has to be there at 7.00pm" Cool! that's ok by me! "where do you want to meet her"? "The house of tea. It's the only place I know well". "Ok. She's phoning me back at 3.00pm, so you go and get ready and I'll tell her to meet you there". "Great! Tell her I will wait outside so she can find me easily, because she has never seen me". "Ok". All was set. The other translators were tapping away at letters and I said "I'd better go make myself pretty then". Galina looked a little puzzled while the other two creased with laughter. They translated for Galina what I'd said and she started! I was on a roll! I asked if there was a plastic surgeon in town and off they went again, translated for Galina and off she went again! It was hilariuos! I like these people! The stunning one who helped with the "D" translation looked at me and said "Don't worry. You don't need a plastic surgeon. You have nice eyes"! I felt like Tom Cruise and wished I was 10 years younger! We said our goodbye's and I skipped happily up the road to "make myself pretty".

This time, I'm doing it right. Out came the suit and the shiny shoes! Quick shower, dressed, smelly stuff on and I'm off. As I'm walking down the road, I feel great! There is pretty girls all over this town and they were looking at me as I passed. At one point I stopped to check my zipper because a real beauty looked at me for about 50 yards until we passed each other. As she passed she smiled! There must be something wrong here! Mmmmmm... My zippers ok and I've nothing hanging out that would make a lady smile. Oh well... On I go... I arrived at the house of tea at 4.00pm and waited... And waited... And waited some more. 4.45 and I get a text from Galina. "She will be there in a few minutes. Please wait"! I replied saying I was here and I'm not going anywhere! "L" sends me a text to ask if I want to meet. I explain the situation and she asks me to call her when I'm free.

As I'm waiting, there is hundreds of nice ladies passing by.  I'm wondering how I'm going to spot "E" amongst all this beauty! This very nice lady walked past me without looking and into the house of tea. I was hoping it was her as she approached, but she walked straight past without a glance. I thought "What's the matter? Not good enough for you? All the others looked"!

5.10 and I'm still here. The stunner came back out of the tea house, walked straight up to me and said "Krissss"? I said *GULP* "E"? She started chatting like mad in Russian and I asked her to speak English. Nyet... No English! Oh for f**k sake! Great week I'm having! We stood looking at each other and trying simple words, but it was useless. I phoned Galina and explained the situation. "Huston, we have a problem"! All her translators are at home and so is she. Great! "Explain to this lady please"! "Hang on. I'll be there in 15 minutes"! I handed the phone to "E" and Galina explained the same to her.

While we waited, I thought "I know! My translator! At least we can communicate in some form until Galina arrives". I show her, explain English - Russian - English. She laughs, tosses her long black hair and nods YES! Progress!  She has a good manner and I was impressed by her light hearted attitude to the whole thing. I switch it on... Nothing! I play with the batteries and try again... Nothing! Things could be a little better at this point! I remember "L" was using it earlier. Maybe she forgot to switch it off? I pull the batteries out and make the motion of throwing them away. She got the picture, laughed and pointed in the direction of the shops. I nodded and off we went. Got new batteries, fitted them and... Nyet!!!!!!! Now she thinks this is real funny, so I laugh my best false laugh and close it with a bang! Not long til Galina arrives so we head back to meet her. On the way, I try it again with no joy.

Now... I have the reputation of being able to fix anything so I used my professional approach. I closed it and hit it almost hard enough to break the screen! That's where the professionalism is, you see? Knowing how hard you can hit it without breaking the screen!  I try again... Bingo! I told you I can fix anything! We arrived back to meet Galina and I start to type. Hang on... Something's not right. It's reset itself to Russian menus and the setting are screwed. I had to set this thing up when I got it and it was a pain. It went back into my pocket and Galina arrived!

We chatted, had tea, chatted some more. I showed her pictures of Ireland etc, etc. We got on very well with Galina translating and this lady has a great sense of humour! She would need to have after that circus! I asked her if she would like to spend the day with me tomorrow with a translator (make it the cute one, pleeeeze). She agrees and it's all set! Happy days! Galina said that I looked VERY nice in my suit and I thanked her very much. We walked "E" to the bus stop and she left for work. Galina asked if I knew how to get to my apartment and I told her I was a local now! While I walked her back to her bus stop, I was waiting for her to ask for the intro fee... Nothing! She said the translator was 6 Euro's per hour and I could just let her know how many hours and pay her before I left for home. Sounds fair to me.

She goes home and so do I. I sent "L" a message to let her know I'm on my way home. I arrived at the apartment and 10 minutes later the door bell rang. I opened the door, but didn't know who this was... Until I looked closer! It was "L" with makeup, hair done and dressed to impress! She told me I looked like a bridegroom and we were going out for dinner. Where would I like to go? I said "You choose". This has become my standard phrase meaning "I trust you". She looked at me with a devilish smile and said "ok". So, off we go!

A short taxi later, we were at Captain Nemo's. A real cool place! Fish and divers everywhere and very modern. It looks very expensive, but I don't care! I like it and tonight were gonna enjoy ourselves! We ordered a three course steak dinner with wine and beer. The service was superb and the food just as good. I told her we were going to have the champagne that nobody won at the bowling ally, so the champagne was ordered, drunk (and so were we) and another bottle ordered. It was also finished, but we were not! After some great fun, some pictures taken and a slow dance, the conversation turned to feelings... Wish it hadn't!... She asked how I felt about my trip, "D", "E" etc... My eyes filled and tears streamed down my face! It was a sudden release of all the emotional sh!t that I'd been pretending didn't matter. All the cr@p that I'd been laughing and joking about all week came out in a few moments. I laugh, joke and make fun of any situation, but it doesn't mean I don't feel it! Hope that makes sense to you guys? As I'm typing this, the same feelings are coming back, so I'll quickly move on from the soppy, girly nonsense and continue!...

She looked deep into my eyes and smiled. It never failed to make me happy! I pulled myself together and we continued having fun like nothing happened. We grabbed a taxi to my place via a shop. At the shop we grabbed two more bottles of champagne stuff for my breakfast and some cigarettes for me. While we were looking into the cigarette cabinet, there was a row of condoms below the cigarettes. "L" looked at them and said "vot you think"? I never missed a beat and said "if you want to smoke, it's ok with me". To be honest, I wasn't 100% sure she was looking at the condoms, so this was the safe and funny answer. As we got into the taxi, she said "wait pleeze, I forget something". She ran back into the shop and emerged a few minutes later. We went to my place...

To be continued............

[TheWongs]

Tuesday continued...

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When we arrived at the apartment, We opened the bottle and had ourselves a party! We were well gone and had one of the funniest nights of my life. The relief of having sorted myself out helped with the good times! We talked about everything in our lives and when we came to the part where I told her I used to walk on my hands, she had to have a demonstration! I have not done this since I was a kid, but she insisted I tried. I managed to do the full length of the apartment, much to her delight (and mine)! I still don't know how I did it. I tried again when I was sober and kept falling over! Maybe alcohol works upside down? If you walk on your hands, you can walk straight! Mmmmmm....

At one point, she looked at me and said "You are fox". I asked her to explain. "You are fox and I am hare. Fox tries to catch hare"! It got very hot, so I took off my jacket. This prompted her to start shouting "Strip! Strip! Strip!" I told her if she said it three more times, I'd do it! So she did! And I did! I'm quite a shy boy, but I'm happy with my body! She was in hysterics!

After the fun and games, I made myself decent and sat down. I said "You are the fox, because you have caught me. I must be the hare"! We opened the next bottle! She was looking at me... Deep into my eyes... I could feel her reading my mind... She started to cry! I put my arms around her and comforted her, asking what was wrong. She said she likes me too much and she didn't like it when I met the other lady today. I felt like a real sh!t!!!!!!! The only thing I could think of to say, was that Galina wanted me to meet her because it didn't work with "D". Galina was trying to help me. She settled down a little and I made her laugh a few times. She looked into my eyes again. This time it was different... It was as if she was letting me read her mind.... I moved closer to her... We kissed... Then I felt even worse! I was playing with this beautiful woman's feelings! Or was I? Maybe she was the fox? We came to our senses and sat apart. I still felt rotten and she knew it. She knew everything that went on in my head! We had half the other bottle, a few more laughs and called it a night.

She called a taxi. When it arrived, we hugged for what seemed like an eternity and then she left. I went to bed, still feeling like a complete b@st@rd! I worried all night because the last thing in this world I wanted to do was to hurt this very wonderful lady.....

[TheWongs]

Wednesday...

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My last full day in Kerch and I woke after yet another restless night. My body clock is completely up the left now! Don't know if I'm awake or just having a nightmare about writing a trip report!

Today, I have a meeting with the beautiful "E", but I considered cancelling it. I sent a text to "L" to see how she is... No reply" Great! Now I've pi$$ed her off! My phone rings and it's Galina. "E" feels that she is too tall for you and will not be there today". I could hardly contain my joy! "That's cool! Bye"! After I hung up, I thought "Too tall"? Shallow b!tch!  Then my mind wandered to some things I'd missed yesterday...

Why did "L" arrive dressed up and ready for a night out? How did she know I'd be dressed up? She didn't have time to get dressed up from the time I told her I was on my way. She had ordered the taxi before she came into my apartment, so if I wasn't ready, it would have to wait... I smell fish! Why was I introduced to "L" on my first day? To let Galina go to work? Mmmmmm... Did "E" think I was too short? Or did "E" get a phone call like mine to say I thought she was too thin? How would "L" find out that I was wearing my suit? There's only one person I know who saw me wearing it and had the chance to let her know to get dressed up... Her best friend... Galina! This turned my mind back to "D", but none of that made any sense. It was all pure speculation on my part, but it's possible!

Still no answer from "L", so I phone her, but there's no reply. I guess I'm on my own today then... I decided to go for a walk to clear my head, get coffee and see Kerch. I'm out walking and I get a text from "L". We arrange to meet at 3.00pm, so I go back to my place to tidy the mess from last night. "L" arrived at 3.30pm and I made her a coffee. She looked like she needed it. We sat quietly and didn't say much. I was wondering if she was regretting last night... I think she was definitely regretting last night! She asked me what I was thinking in her usual cute way and I didn't have the b@lls to tell her. We decided to got to our usual cafe for our usual soup, but without the vodka! As we walked I was thinking how much I wished I'd kept my lips to myself last night! This was my last full day here and it was like a wet Sunday! I can only imagine how she felt!

Over lunch she looked into my eyes to download the latest news and said "vot you think-ink"? I told her that I thought she was upset about last night and how bad it made me feel. I like it when she smiles too, but she was not smiling and it was because of me! She said that she liked me too much and she wished I had been writing to her for 5 months! With that out of the way, the air cleared the mood improved slightly. At least none of us regretted last night too much... I think.

Earlier in the week she had sent me a text and it said "I kiss you". I had replied with "I kiss you too", but I use predictive text and didn't check what I was sending, she received "I lips you too". When she arrived that day, she was confused and I had to explain and show her why I sent it. She thought this was very funny and had sent me a few "lips" since, just to pi$$ me off (in a good way of course) 

As we walked towards my apartment, I sent her "I lips you". She looked at her phone and started to laugh. The mood improved some more and we were on the happy path again. When we arrived at the apartment, the fun starts again with her throwing things at me to see if she can hit me before I block them with my hands. This is a game that started when I told her my reactions are quite fast. She was laughing her head off and throwing everything she could get her hands on. Just one of those silly things you do when you're having fun... Unless there's something Wong with me and you guys don't do this stuff?

She has to go at 8.30 but tells me that she'll come back when she's sorted some things at home. As she's leaving, I give her a hug and pucker up for her to kiss me. She turns her cheek and I kiss it. She gives me a wink and one of her cheeky smiles, then leaves. I don't know if she will come back. I sat watching tv, but couldn't think about anything else but "L". I think to myself how different things would have been if I had written to her for 5 months! This lady is going to make some lucky man very, very happy! Why do I have to be so f**king shallow? She's not my type, simply because of her shape. That's sad! The more I think about it, the more I hate myself! Maybe I'm just a stupid Irishman?...

Just as I expected. 10.30 and "L" sends me a text to say she has a problem at home and can't come back. A long and lonely last night in Kerch! Nobody to blame but myself. Stop feeling sorry for yourself man and go to bed... Sh!t!!! I miss her already! Why? She's not who I came to meet and she's not even my type! Do I even have a type any more? What sort of fool am I?...... I finish the rest of the champagne, watch some tv and hit the hay.......

[TheWongs]

Thursday...

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I was awake for most of the night, but I don't really know why I've not been sleeping well. Yes, I've put up with some sh!t, but I've also had some brilliant times! I jump into the shower and prepare for my next torture!

I phoned Galina and asked her to meet me at the train station instead of her collecting me in a taxi. She doesn't question why!!! While I'm on the phone I asked to buy a nice bunch of flowers and bring them with her. She asked me what sort, so I told her to choose something really nice. She didn't ask why, or for who!!! This directed my mind back to my thoughts about the dressing up and "E" cancelling our date. I don't care now anyway. Who was "E" or "D" anyway? I can't even remember! I wish I'd spent the whole week with "L" and if I had it would have been a very special week indeed!

I start to get a little worried that she won't show up to say goodbye. I put those thoughts out of my mind. Of course she will!.. Will she?... I don't want to leave this place! Is it too late to change my flight and train? If I thought I could do it, I surely would!... "L" arrived at my place at 8.45 and we went for breakfast. She took me to a different part of town this time. As we rode in the bus, I wrote a shopping list of things to eat on the train. We could pick them up later. We found a nice cafe and ordered my last meal in Kerch. "L was not happy and I understood why. I felt the same way! We were both sad that our time had come to an end. We spent a lot of time looking at each other, but not speaking. there was no need to say anything because we could see it in each others eyes!

It was a wonderful breakfast with good conversation... The conversation of minds! We left the cafe and went to the shopping centre. During the trip around here, she suddenly stopped at the sweet stand, picked up a few packets of "Rondo" mints and put them in the basket. She knew I liked these mints! The consideration and attention to detail still amazes me! Tears filled my eyes. She stroked my face and gave me that now famous wink and smile. I was back to normal again, so we finished up and went back to my apartment. We checked I had everything packed and we drank coffee for the last time together. We had some laughs and chatted about some stuff. The time departed and the taxi arrived. I put on my coat and she fixed my collar like my mommy would!

I climbed into the front of the taxi and she sat behind me. As we were driving, I put my hand behind the seat. She held it and stroked it until we arrived at the station. As we pulled up, Galina was standing with a large bunch of orchids. Perfect! I jumped out of the taxi and took the flowers from Galina, who gave me a big wink and I turned round and handed them to "L". I said "These flowers are not enough to show you how much I have enjoyed being with you this week". She smiled a little, then started to cry. I held her and kissed her cheek. I don't know, or care what Galina made of this (or the taxi driver. He was shouting at me to take my cases from the boot of his car)!

My opinion is that Galina knew exactly what was going on since we met. I also think she is a very good, kind lady and there was no malicious intent IF she did help to "push" us together. She cares about her ladies and her clients. "L" isn't one of her ladies, but you know what I mean. I gave her enough to cover the flowers plus some extra. She deserved it for having to move me twice, fix me up with someone else, listen to me whining about "D" etc. I climbed aboard the train, found my cabin and loaded my bags into the metal lockers under the seats. Galina and "L" joined me and Galina thanked me for coming and for being such good fun to be with and talk to. I'm quite flattered and am glad that I can communicate with and make these people laugh. This was something I was worried about believe it or not! She told me what a good man I am and she's sorry it didn't work out with "D" (Who?). She says "I will leave you two to say goodbye. Come back to see us again Krisss"...

"L" and I sat on opposite seats holding both hands for a while. There is still 5 minutes to go, so she takes me back off the train so I can have a last smoke. Never stops thinking of me! The 2 minute whistle blows. I turned to "L" and moved forward to kiss her. She turned her cheek, so I kissed it. I did it again so she turned the other cheek, so I kissed it too. She is grinning her cheeky grin and I kiss her softly on the lips. "Goodbye "L". "Goodbye Krisss". She fixed my collar again, I climbed aboard and made my way to the cabin. "L" was standing outside my window, holding her flowers like she was in some mushy romantic movie. I took a photo of her with my phone through the very dirty train window. The train pulled away and we blew each other a final kiss. Goodbye Kerch! Goodbye "L"!.....

[TheWongs]

No point in boring you with details of the trip home. The train ride was the same as the first, with no problems at all. Pavel was there to meet me. It was great to see his smiling face again! We went to his house, relaxed with a beer, watched a movie and had a great chat. Then, off to the airport. Check in was a doddle and nothing was a problem. Before I knew it I was on the plane and in the air! I landed in Birmingham, met my good mate Luckylucky and we had far too many pints! The following morning I was in the air and back home in no time.

TheWongs has landed!....

[TheWongs]

Final thoughts... For what they're worth...

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I joined this forum after very nearly sending money to a scammer. I was writing to another lady too and this turned out to be an email scam by the agency (I think). I knew nothing of this process! I still look upon myself as being a new kid and I don't think of myself as having much to offer except some (nearly) funny comments.

I feel a little guilty about this and, same as some other guys here, I want to give something back. I'm not sure if anything I've written could ever be of any help to anyone, but I hope so. This forum has taught me how to do, and how not to do. It has provided the tools, information, contacts and above all, the friendship and support for me to get off my a$$ and do this!

For all that, I thank everyone here for making it possible for a thick Irishman like me to go to, see and meet the people in a very wonderful place!

I've spent some time thinking about what I did wrong and what I did right (that was a short list). I don't feel that I did anything very stupid, but I did make mistakes. It could happen to all of us, and has happened to a lot of us. It's like meeting the most beautiful girl in the world... Her smiling and winking at you... Everything is going beautifully... Then you break wind! The farts are out there... And they will find you!

I was a total fool for thinking that writing to "D" for 5 months would be the key to success! It could have been different if the chemistry was there, but hey, that's the way it goes! I hold no ill feeling towards "D" at all, apart from the frustration of loosing 4 days. Big deal! 4 days is a gift when compared with a lifetime of misery! I wish her every happiness and I've already sent an email to Galina to pass that message to her. Sure, it's good to write and establish contacts and yes, it's good to phone them. But there is nothing and I mean NOTHING, will EVER replace getting over there and doing it! I met one that I'd been writing to and another that was arranged because we both were looking for a partner. Who do I fall for??? One I wouldn't consider "my type" and I was introduced to as the friend of the agency owner over coffee! Do and say what you like! There's no way anyone can know anything until they are face to face with a genuine lady with a beautiful personality! You can't write that, see it on a video, or hear it on a phone! All you can do is get some clues. You must look into those eyes and feel her reading your thoughts! You must notice all the tiny, considerate little things she does for you! You must know who this lady is by looking into her eyes and feeling her warmth for you! The feeling of complete trust in someone! There is no technology, letter, or web page that can do that, or will ever do that! Yes, there are GCG's and scammers, but when you meet someone genuine and special, those famous words will ring so very true... "When a Russian lady likes you... You WILL know it"! I always wondered what that statement meant... Until now! Remember those words when you meet your special lady. You have to feel it to know what it really means! My profile has been changed from WOVO to say that my approach is "Unsure", but there are two things I AM sure of... 1# I'm 100% sure this is what I AM going to do and I will not give up!... 2# I will return to this place Kerch... Of that, I am very, VERY sure!...

Many, many, thanks to Don and Luckylucky for phoning me and keeping me sane while I was there! I love you guys dearly!!!

Did I go to Kerch the Wong way? I don't think so!

It's been an emotional rollercoaster.

But you know what?... I can't wait for my next ride!

Until next time my friends......