Be honest: Why are you looking for a woman in Russia and other countries of FSU

[DonAz]

Do you want to say that guys on this board, guys who are looking for a life partner, go around the world just because their looks and assets do not let them to date and marry a local woman?

I never had a problem meeting and dating very beautiful women in the US. In fact just about every woman I ever dated was very beautiful. I grew up in NY and I was a model in my early twenties. So I dated a good number of models while I lived there.

I am not the least bit shy. I’ve met women at gas stations who were pumping gas on the other side of the same pump I was using. I do not subscribe to the theory that all WW are ……….fill in the blanks. I have found many great ladies in the US. My ex-wife being one of them.

After my divorce I dated quite a bit. I was in my early 40’s and most of the Ladies I dated were in their twenties. Sorry but I am attracted to young beautiful women and had no trouble dating them here. Problem was I could not find one that really trips the love trigger for me. I started to get tired of just dating, was getting older, and wanted to find a life mate, but for some reason it wasn’t happening locally So more out of curiosity and a sense of adventure I started looking at all the hot looking Ladies listed by agencies in the FSU  ( this was back in 2001-2002). I wrote many of them but nothing really developed until I saw my Yulia’s profile. Long story short.  Yulia and I have been together for a little over 5 years now. She is not more beautiful then some of the Ladies I’ve dated in the USA but she is the Lady I fell in love with and I thank God everyday for the miracle of finding that true love half way  around the world.

So my looks and assets did not have anything to do with me looking in the FSU as opposed to the USA or any other place. Except to say, I am only  attracted to very good looking white women. I could go on about how we are very compatible, but that is a subject for another thread.

[Misha]

So either you misread most people's posts or you assumed they weren't being entirely truthful.

The latter in this case. Either people are not entirely truthful to others (it is an internet forum after all) or they are not being entirely truthful to themselves.

[Misha]

Drunk and abusive men are also factors there.  

Russia has its fair share of women who drink too much and are abusive to their children.

Men going out and sleeping with whoever they want is also an issue.

These men have to sleep with someone right? This means they are either sleeping with single women who do not have any objections to sleeping with married men or are sleeping with married women.

This is not every man, but I believe it is very much culture driven.  I saw all this with my own eyes also.  The amount of Vodka, beer, and other drinking is destroying the men there.  I did not see it nearly as much in the women.

Well, I saw quite a bit of drinking with the women. Quite often you would have couples where both were alcoholics.

Yes we have our domestic abuse issues, and you can throw the statistic that we have higher percentage of reported cases.  I will counter that fact with the murder of a domestic partner by men is exponentially higher in the FSU, and the domestic abuse is not reported and also culture defined.  A case would not be reported there, that would have a man here thrown in jail in the USA.

Well, I agree with you there. Sadly, the state has been pretty indifferent and has done little to help.

I also got told by my fiancee's parents that most men there would never support another man's child.

Well, this certainly is a factor in the motivation of some women to seek foreign husbands (not that I am implying that it played a role in your fiancees decision).

Finally, we can talk about the bad men of Russia, but let us not forget that they were mainly raised by Russian women. If the sons are narcissists, then the mothers (and fathers) certainly played a role in that.

[Enot]

Men drinking ... women drinking ... being abusive to spouses/children ... single/married people sleeping around ... it's not just in Russia ... it's in every country of the world.

[Misha]

Men drinking ... women drinking ... being abusive to spouses/children ... single/married people sleeping around ... it's not just in Russia ... it's in every country of the world.

Well, I agree with you here. The point is that there is a tendency on such sites to place RW on a pedestal. Don't get me wrong, there are some great women from Russia, but there are others that are for from great. The same could be said of women (and men) from any country or region of the world. It is not logical to berage Russian men, and somehow believe that Russian women were left untouched by the social problems of the FSU.

[LEGAL]

  Misha you have derailed Olga's thread http://www.illwillpress.com/FOR33.html

[Misha]

  Misha you have derailed Olga's thread http://www.illwillpress.com/FOR33.html

Legal riding in to the rescue LOL. Define derailed? Having an opinion that is contrary to Olga's? This is a discussion forum after all.

[Ade]

The latter in this case. Either people are not entirely truthful to others (it is an internet forum after all) or they are not being entirely truthful to themselves.

I will go as far as to say that there seems to be a lot of WM that rationalize their desire for a very young and pretty FSUW with fantasies of how morale/traditional/Madonna-like/whatever they all are in comparison to women in their own country, which, as I think many of us here can say, is not really the case generally speaking. In fact, in my experience, you're just as likely to find those types of women in any country in Western Europe as the FSU.

I think you should be careful in assuming that we're all lying or deluding ourselves though.

FWIW, I definitely don't want a "traditional" wife. 

[msmoby_ru]

  Misha you have derailed Olga's thread http://www.illwillpress.com/FOR33.html

Robert

AGAIN you're behaving like some "frustrated moderator"... if you think Misha's doing that use the "report moderator" button - and make your point to them...  *I* don't think he is BTW

May be you could tell us why *you* looked for a FSUW women and bring it "on topic" - I did ask Olga if she wanted an explanation from men married to FSUW, but may be she missed it ..

[Enot]

I think the thread was derailed because the question was, why do you searching for a Russian/foreign woman.  The discussion seems to be, not all RW are "morale/traditional/Madonna-like/or whatever".

[Diplomacy]

I do not think the topic is derailed.  The fact is that I wanted a strong woman that is capable of handling anything that life throws at us.  It is also important that Misha is in the trenches over there and many of us, including myself have had very little exposure to the life over there.

I agree completely that there are some real mean women over there also.  This is a very high risk pursuit that we are involved in, and it is important to bring as much information to light as we can.

The statistics and anecdotal evidence I have heard was a factor in my decision in seeking a UW.  My friend's wife and my fiancee both were married to men that were gone one day and never supported the child in any manner. 

As for the drinking, domestic abuse, and cheating on spouses.  I am saying that the percentage of men involved is higher in the FSU, then it is in the USA.  It is a culture that is tolerant and a government that does not have or enforce laws to change the current situation.

I counted between 10-40 people drinking in front of the grocery stores every time I went by.  Usually the men outnumbered the women 4 to 1.  At night you could here the men drinking and cheering in the courtyard of the apartments I stayed in from early in the evening to late at night.

The parks turned into the local bar after dark and were happy hour hangouts all day long.  They were smashing bottles where the children were playing.

To be fair, I am involved in social reformation there.  I was specifically looking for this information, and where to try and stop the perpetuation of this and other issues in future generations.

I would also think about spending time in a woman's center and listening to their story.  No person should be subject to the horror that many of them face.

The way they have been treated and the way they are treated by some wm is a factor to the FSUW seeking WM.  My fiancee did all she could to talk my friend's wife into leaving to America.  She changed her opinion after seeing how she was treated by my friend, and the wonderful life they have together.

For every success story we have on this forum, there are also bad men and bad women who make it harder for the uninformed to pursue this avenue. 

Looks are not the primary attribute that the women are looking for a lot of the time.  You have the reports that support that on the forum.  They want good men, and they are precious to them.  They want a man that is going to be there for them and their family.  Not going to beat them, and treat them like women should be treated.

This is out of the mouth of women that clearly knew I was not an option for marriage.  I was there to hear their story and try and better understand the way life is there. 

I admire anyone that can work full time, raise a family, and in many cases still take classes to better their quality of life in the future.  If you are looking at just the physical attributes of the FSUW, then you better be very careful.  You better be a strong man at the same time, these women are survivors and fighters in many cases.  Their blood boils with the best of them, and the Cozzacks were once glorious warriors. 

[Misha]

I will go as far as to say that there seems to be a lot of WM that rationalize their desire for a very young and pretty FSUW with fantasies of how morale/traditional/Madonna-like/whatever they all are in comparison to women in their own country, which, as I think many of us here can say, is not really the case generally speaking.

I like the way that you phrased it, and can agree with that.

There are a number of reasons why I would say that a man (and woman) would have to be motivated by the idea that they can get something better.

For most men, they lose a lot by seeking a wife in another country:

• Financial, and I am not just talking about plane fares and hotels. As most Western Women work (70% or so and a much higher proportion among women younger than 50 and not on maternity leave) they contribute to the family income. It is rare that a RW will arrive in her new country and start working and making as much as an American woman in the same profession she had back home because of language issues and having to establish a new network in her new country;
• Emotional. A man marrying a woman from another country will follow her on her emotional roller ride over a year as she goes through culture shock. This can be a pretty hellish experience IMHO, even when it is a good marriage and both love each other.
• Time. When you marry a foreign women, you have to spend a great deal of time helping her get settled in, helping her doing things that any woman from your country would already know how to do. How many American men or Canadian men, for example, have to teach their American or Canadian wives how to drive?

A RW woman will also be sacrificing a great deal for a foreign husband. The include:

• A profession that they loved. As I noted, language issues may make it difficult for them to immediately start working in their old profession in their new country. Some are lucky and can immediately find a job in their chosen careers immediately, but I would estimate that these are the exceptions;
• Family and friends who will be thousands of miles away which contributes to the culture shock.

She, presumably would need some pretty strong motivations to leave as well. You hope that she is leaving because she did not find any men that she considered good enough, and married a foreigner because she considered him a better man than the local men she could date and marry. Much better than a woman who is motivated to simply leave for financial reasons and will use any man to achieve this goal. Nonetheless, if a woman considered that she could find a better man in her country, she would not marry a foreigner in most cases.

There are certainly many other disadvantages for both men and women marrying a foreigner.

Given the disadvantages, somebody who is reasonable would need a very strong reason to actively seek a foreign bride or husband, and they would have to really believe they can find someone a lot better than they could back home.

My conclusion based on what I have read and seen is that looks is the main motivator. They hope to get someone prettier, thinner and perhaps younger. All things told, this is probably better than other options. I have met some guys in the past whose main motivation seemed to be their belief that RW would somehow be more docile, submissive and controllable than women in their own country. Other potential options would be the desire to be a knight in shining armor or perhaps cultural reasons (i.e. someone had a grandmother who was Russian).

There are some men who do not fall into these categories. Usually these are the men who worked overseas or happened to meet a RW and fell in love.

As for wanting a "traditional" woman, I would wager that most American men would have much better luck going to a small American town in one of their red states and looking for a woman who identifies herself as "Christian" as the odds are likely much better that she will be truly "traditional" than most RW foreigners are likely to encounter.

Sorry for the long post. Just thinking out loud on the topic.

[OlgaH]

Legal riding in to the rescue LOL. Define derailed? Having an opinion that is contrary to Olga's? This is a discussion forum after all.

Misha, LOL I don't need to be rescued because I'm not perishing as you would like to think    Legal posted his opinion as a member. So what? Just try to keep your train on the rails and everything will be OK 

Yes, after all it is discussion forum and the name of the thread "Be honest: Why are you looking for a woman in Russia and other countries of FSU?" and I have invited members of this board to share their reasons on my question that is arisen from the reason that was given by you.
________________________________________________________________________

Seems to me that looks and the ability(hope) of finding a younger and slimmer woman is the primary criteria listed first in all of the posts so far.

So, Misha, do you hold your opinion that most time men, members of this board, looking for a woman overseas or married a woman from FSU, because of lack of their looks and finances they can not get an attractive woman locally?     

Do you want to say that guys on this board, guys who are looking for a life partner, go around the world just because their looks and assets do not let them to date and marry a local woman?

Most times yes, and most times they will claim other reasons (search for a more traditional woman, cultured women, etc...). If you look at the postings, the most common complaints that always comes up is that American women are overweight (to put it politely). If the men in the MOB thought they could get an equally attractive women at home, few would ever leave their homes in search of foreign brides.

[Diplomacy]

So, Misha, do you hold your opinion that most time men, members of this board, looking for a woman overseas or married a woman from FSU, because of lack of their looks and finances they can not get an attractive woman locally?     

Hehe, Olga just set Misha up for a flogging.  See I told you they are clever.

I believe that the married guys should chime in.  They got the T shirt and all.  The forum is different, because there are guys that care enough to guide the men that are looking.  I think it is fair to say, that they also are known to set the ones straight if their intentions are not well founded. 

What is your husband's input Olga?

[OlgaH]

What is your husband's input Olga?

Robert and I discussed it prior our marriage. When I received the first "hello" from Robert, a nice looking man in suite and tie (oh, that always is my weakness  )   I also was interested in an answer "why in Russia?"

One of the Robert's uncles has been doing business (in the aerospace industry ) in Russia since the 1980s and  married a Russian woman.  Robert saw and heard many good thing about Russia and Russian people. 
After Robert's first trip to Russia, he just fell in love with the Russian culture, history, people and of course cuisine  Robert made friends with some Russian women  in Saint Petersburg, later he introduced me to them,  and we had a wonderful time all together having parties, visiting museums and theaters, and we are still in contact with them.  The friendly personalities of those women, their openness and of course their appearance (always look after oneself), their views on the life, family and men played a great role in Robert's decision to look seriously for a soul mate in Russia, also that women were the first people who told Robert and me that we look great together and were just "created" for each other  Plus add the portion of romanticism that btw is also characteristic of me and played its own part in my decision to look my life partner abroad.  Just imagine: somewhere very very far a person lives thinking about you, you both speak different languages, you are separated by distance and time, but you are together in your thoughts and views on different things in the life 

Here, in America, I have met many of Robert's friends and colleagues. Honestly, it is like a music for my ears when I hear from them about Robert's professionalism, and especially from American women of different ages how lucky I'm to have such husband as Robert   

[Chicagoguy]

Misha,

Thanks for the best well thought out reply I have ever read.

I agree.

[msmoby_ru]

Hehe, Olga just set Misha up for a flogging.  See I told you they are clever.

Hi, Diplomacy - I look forward to Misha's reply.. I'm quite sure he is "up" to the challenge

 
I believe that the married guys should chime in.  They got the T shirt and all.  The forum is different, because there are guys that care enough to guide the men that are looking.  I think it is fair to say, that they also are known to set the ones straight if their intentions are not well founded. 

OK, Sir, as you asked.. here's one married Man's input..

I was always interested in the history of the European nations that were behind the "iron curtain" and *I* don't think we ( a teenager of the 70's) were taught enough about the Soviet block at schools in Britain. It was hard to meet them and harder to be "allowed" to meet the real people. Indeed, my Wife's city was "closed" to foreigners during Soviet times - as it was a major producer of rocket fuel and other important military hardware !!

We were lucky enough to have a "pinko" ( slightly left of centre) English teacher in the times just before Mrs Thatcher and most of my generation couldn't WAIT to be old enough to vote out the Socialists ! ... He was a character and regarded as "eccentric" as he seemed to like too many Russian things - at a time when this meant you had to be a "Communist" a BAD thing .. 

This guy gave us the option to read Soljenitzen's "One day in the life of Ivan Denisovich" and study it for English Literature - my appetite was whetted.  I was interested to know how the real people of Eastern Bloc countries felt and in those days it was FANTASTIC to read about driving a Jaguar into Hungary - to Budapest - and the reaction of the people..

I wanted to see these places...   

Later in life, I moved to Cyprus ( an island which is a former colony of Britain) and found many FSU folk lived there - or were tourists.


Not many people from Britain knew much about the FSU nations and I was keen to mix with these people and even meet a FSU woman :-o

I preferred the company of the Russian speakers - finding them to be intelligent, cultured and YES the women seemed to "wear well" - but may be they needed a little less make up ? )

Many of my clients were Russian speakers and I started going to "The" Ukraine and Russia for "business" reasons .. I really did manage to combine business, and pleasure and have seen many interesting places  I read about in history books.

My Russian speaking friends were always trying to marry me off ( I was a divorcee - but I wanted to find my own woman) and I resolved to try to learn the language and spoke Russian with my coworkers and clients - causing much hilarity ..

Before I left Cyprus for a FSU country ( Ukraine was the first ) I had an idea of customs and what to expect - but nothing can prepare you for state of many ex-Soviet built apartments [especially the entrances ] and then the warmth ( no smiles for a stranger ) of welcome when meeting families.

Personally speaking *I* decided a Russian ( speaking ) Wife would be great. I was looking for a lady close to my age with "Soviet" values - respecting a "strong" man- (how can one phrase that without sounding pompous, or like a control - freak? ) where a family unit is important..

I also "noted" that the FSU women looked good for their age and cared about their appearance- they were intelligent, cultured and damn sexy.

So, I was lucky .. I had Russian speaking friends helping me and I wasn't in a rush - though they will tell you - correctly - that I was desperate for companionship... and love.

I met a few beautiful, attractive, intelligent women with children, who were teenagers or nearly grown up and one lady with a young child.  My wife now says if she knew how many "hero cities" I had visited ( Kiev, Sevastopol, Novorossiysk, Volgograd being examples ) - she might have crossed me off her "list" - but she realised I was interested in her country and it's people.

I placed my profile on a dating site and mentioned I knew a lot about the FSU and could speak some Russian and I received lots of "hits" ....  it is very flattering - too flattering ?! - but I didn't encounter any scammers- may be because they knew I knew some Russian or perhaps the age group I sought - I don't know..

So... Of course looks come into it, and FSU women WANT to please their men in the kitchen and other rooms in the house!

I adore the vast range of different dishes that come from what was the Soviet Union and yet here are women who know how to take care of themselves and look good in a bikini - ( such interesting combinations ) - is it me or have other guys noticed how many FSU women can look pale in the winter and yet have wonderful olive skin that tans so amazingly in the summer - a hang over from Ghenghis Khan ? 

Looks fade and time can dull passion, but I find the small differences in our upbringing and expectations mean there's rarely a dull moment..

OK, so may be I have described a very narrow ( yet generalised ) reasoning - but these delicious combos  worked and work for me..

There is nothing better than being married with a good Russian speaking woman - most of the time

So those of you who haven't tried it - yet - try to learn about the history and culture of the FSU countries and please DON'T be a "keyboard romeo" and never visit - or think just visiting will mean you'll find women queued up to meet and marry you.

Thanks, Olga, for starting this thread.... really !

[Diplomacy]

Thanks Olga! I believe that you are both very lucky in love.

Misha that is well put and thought out. 

Chicago Guy,Cyprus is of a place I will visit one day, it was the last stronghold of Jacque Demoly, until the Saracens pushed them back.  Being from a long line of Masons and of French decent, I think it would be interesting.  On top of the fact it looks beautiful.  Oops, that puts me in the knight in shining armor realm.  We do not wear shining armor, now it is body armor lol.

I told my fiancee that the eyes are from the Khan and she did not think that was one bit true.  Oh well, it is.  They are very enchanting eyes no matter the origin, probably my favorite feature of the women there.  Just a shame there are too many with sad eyes walking around.  They get a real fire to them when they get mad too.

[UTRO]

OK, Sir, as you asked.. here's one married Man's input..

I was always interested in the history of the European nations that were behind the "iron curtain" and *I* don't think we ( a teenager of the 70's) were taught enough about the Soviet block at schools in Britain. It was hard to meet them and harder to be "allowed" to meet the real people. Indeed, my Wife's city was "closed" to foreigners during Soviet times - as it was a major producer of rocket fuel and other important military hardware !!

We were lucky enough to have a "pinko" ( slightly left of centre) English teacher in the times just before Mrs Thatcher and most of my generation couldn't WAIT to be old enough to vote out the Socialists ! ... He was a character and regarded as "eccentric" as he seemed to like too many Russian things - at a time when this meant you had to be a "Communist" a BAD thing .. 

This guy gave us the option to read Soljenitzen's "One day in the life of Ivan Denisovich" and study it for English Literature - my appetite was whetted.  I was interested to know how the real people of Eastern Bloc countries felt and in those days it was FANTASTIC to read about driving a Jaguar into Hungary - to Budapest - and the reaction of the people..

I wanted to see these places...   

Later in life, I moved to Cyprus ( an island which is a former colony of Britain) and found many FSU folk lived there - or were tourists.


Not many people from Britain knew much about the FSU nations and I was keen to mix with these people and even meet a FSU woman :-o

I preferred the company of the Russian speakers - finding them to be intelligent, cultured and YES the women seemed to "wear well" - but may be they needed a little less make up ? )

Many of my clients were Russian speakers and I started going to "The" Ukraine and Russia for "business" reasons .. I really did manage to combine business, and pleasure and have seen many interesting places  I read about in history books.

My Russian speaking friends were always trying to marry me off ( I was a divorcee - but I wanted to find my own woman) and I resolved to try to learn the language and spoke Russian with my coworkers and clients - causing much hilarity ..

Before I left Cyprus for a FSU country ( Ukraine was the first ) I had an idea of customs and what to expect - but nothing can prepare you for state of many ex-Soviet built apartments [especially the entrances ] and then the warmth ( no smiles for a stranger ) of welcome when meeting families.

Personally speaking *I* decided a Russian ( speaking ) Wife would be great. I was looking for a lady close to my age with "Soviet" values - respecting a "strong" man- (how can one phrase that without sounding pompous, or like a control - freak? ) where a family unit is important..

I also "noted" that the FSU women looked good for their age and cared about their appearance- they were intelligent, cultured and damn sexy.

So, I was lucky .. I had Russian speaking friends helping me and I wasn't in a rush - though they will tell you - correctly - that I was desperate for companionship... and love.

I met a few beautiful, attractive, intelligent women with children, who were teenagers or nearly grown up and one lady with a young child.  My wife now says if she knew how many "hero cities" I had visited ( Kiev, Sevastopol, Novorossiysk, Volgograd being examples ) - she might have crossed me off her "list" - but she realised I was interested in her country and it's people.

I placed my profile on a dating site and mentioned I knew a lot about the FSU and could speak some Russian and I received lots of "hits" ....  it is very flattering - too flattering ?! - but I didn't encounter any scammers- may be because they knew I knew some Russian or perhaps the age group I sought - I don't know..

So... Of course looks come into it, and FSU women WANT to please their men in the kitchen and other rooms in the house!

I adore the vast range of different dishes that come what was the Soviet Union and yet here are women who know how to take care of themselves and look good in a bikini - ( such interesting combinations ) - is it me or have other guys noticed how many FSU women can look pale in the winter and yet have wonderful olive skin that tans so amazingly in the summer - a hang over from Genghis Khan ? 

Looks fade and time can dull passion, but I find the small differences in our upbringing and expectations mean there's rarely a dull moment..

OK, so may be I have described a very narrow ( yet generalised ) reasoning - but these delicious combos  worked and work for me..

There is nothing better than being married with a good Russian speaking woman - most of the time

So those of you who haven't tried it - yet - try to learn about the history and culture of the FSU countries and please DON'T be a "keyboard romeo" and never visit - or think just visiting will mean you'll find women queued up to meet and marry you.

Thanks, Olga, for starting this thread.... really !

Your Thoughts are mine Exactly. Great job of putting them to Print

[Misha]

Hehe, Olga just set Misha up for a flogging.  See I told you they are clever.

What is your husband's input Olga?

Olga is on my ignore list, so I don't read what she writes. I only see what she has written as quoted by others.

However, where is my flogging?

Also, it is interesting to note that Legal still has to post a reply to his wife's question.

[msmoby_ru]

Olga is on my ignore list, so I don't read what she writes. I only see what she has written as quoted by others.

Also, it is interesting to note that Legal still has to post a reply to his wife's question.

The "sad" thing about putting people on ignore lists is that you may ( and in this case DID) miss important things..

[GoodOlBoy]

Honestly, I started my search several years ago, because I wanted an INTELLIGENT (well educated), YOUNGER (5-10 years), FEMININE (not feminist), SEXY woman for my lifetime partner (wife). I was really tired of the "cows". I live in N. Miami and I try to go for a walk on the beach almost everyday. I found and married my beautiful Siberian princess, so it doesn't seem to nauseate me anymore when I see all of the 200+ lb. women in 2 piece bathing suits "herding" on the beaches.  

[Diplomacy]

The "sad" thing about putting people on ignore lists is that you may ( and in this case DID) miss important things..

Yes, but it is kind of amusing that it did appear they were in an actual conversation.  It is all null and void, if you did not read the Posts.  Never mind Misha

Goodolboy glad to see yet another success story. 

I broke my own rule with my fiancee.  Find a woman just good looking enough to turn you on, the rest in the looks department is nothing but trouble.

[StickyFly]

I have not read all replies but from the few replies I have read no one says they are looking because they are having difficulty finding a girl of same quality in their own country. Not sure if that's norm for most men looking in FSU or those that fall into that category choose not to reply to avoid looking bad but here is my honest answer.

First with a friend of mine. He has married and divorced two very pretty, self admitted out of league FSU women, and now looking for another FSU woman to marry to. He has trouble talking to women in US.

I have had pretty good luck with women before I moved to New York. After I moved to New York I hit a dry spell, had only been with two women in last two years. So when my friend told me about his socials in FSU it got me curious about international women. I registered an international dating site, not specifically for FSU but all internationals. I started sending out emails to women all over Europe(From France,England, Sweden, Poland to FSU) as well as USA and Canada. When I took my vacation in Thailand she is the only one agreeing to fly there to meet me.

So yes, I was desperate. I felt it is not a temporary dry spell but because I am older(38) and no longer attractive. I moved here knowing no one so it gets lonely sometimes. I want to have a child and I don't know how long it'd take me to meet a girl in US and how long we will have to date before we get married. By that time I may be too old.

[ca71447]

Hi Olga - sorry it has taken me so long to reply to your questions.  A lot has happened in the last month, and none of it has been good ...

If I understood you  you don't have any problem to date a local woman just because your assets don't let you do so,  and it is not your reason why you are looking a woman overseas. If not please correct me. 

I think my main problem with dating local women is more due to my lack of confidence in myself.  I am told quite often that I am very attractive by women.  I get compliments on how well "stacked" I am - I always laugh to myself when I hear that one.  Virtually all of my female friends cannot figure out why I some woman hasn't grabbed me yet.  I always hear that I have a great personality, great sense of humor, and am very friendly.  But I actually have a very poor self image of myself and a definite lack of confidence.  I am currently seeing a psychologist, and even she was amazed by my lack of confidence.  There is a lot more to this, but I won't take up the space for it.  If you want to know more, pm me and I can fill you in ....


Is your look a reason to search a woman overseas, because AW scorn you?

For this answer ... I think I answered it above.  And for the record, due to all that is taking place in my life right now (none of it good), I have given up all hope and stopped looking anywhere.  But I do enjoy coming here and reading and learning about others successes, failures, and lessons learned.  This is really an excellent site for any dating related problems or situations.