Wife split!

[OlgaH]

The truth from Wayne's point of view is shared with us. And yes, I do tend to believe what he has posted as he has always been, IMO, up front with us here but I am lost on how you can equate the total truth with your disclaimer. I'm sure it makes sense to you but it is not the all encompassing truth and really has no bearing on the situation at hand.

catzenmouse,

When a member shares his problem and tell us his story we have to choices: to trust or not to trust. When we doubt and question his truth, more over try to write our own versions and guesses of his truth it is already distrust. So, members who wish to share their problems with us (with other members) should realize in advance that they will be distrusted and probably it doesn't even worth to share the problems and story.     

[OlgaH]

No guesses - that she came here only to get a GC. What a treasure - everyone wants it so bad 

Wayne's fictitious (by her own wish) wife wanted to get a GC so bad   

Wife admits she has a boyfriend and moved in with him.  I wondered how she was getting all the expensive new clothes.  Tells me her immigration lawyer says she has to live with me for the green card issue.  Says she is moving back in. 

[catzenmouse]

catzenmouse,

When a member shares his problem and tell us his story we have to choices: to trust or not to trust. When we doubt and question his truth, more over try to write our own versions and guesses of his truth it is already distrust. So, members who wish to share their problems with us (with other members) should realize in advance that they will be distrusted and probably it doesn't even worth to share the problems and story.     

OlgaH,

 If someone comes here who is new or completely unknown then their story will be questioned. What I have seen in this thread is more of a "feeding frenzy" of people wanting to convict the woman based on, what is in reality, no real evidence.

 Wayne has been around here for some time so his story, IMO, has more validity due to that time that we (as a community) have come to know him.

 Plenty of folks have shared their stories here, both good and bad, and while there have been questions and requests for clarification they generally do not result in this type of thread where people are sniping at each other or making accusations about each other which have absolutely nothing to do with the situation being discussed.

FWIW

[Doll]

Of course the bank doesn't care who pays, but they do care whose name is on the contract.  In their eyes, he is responsible for 100% of the amount owed for a car that he now does not have posession of.

As for Wayne- it is 100% clear, we were talking of "let's say ".
Lets say the car is on two names then the banks don't care of 50% or 25% or whatever- they will get the money (the whole thing ) from any of the spouses. It would be the joint property , doesn't matter who pays what percent. And it can not be claimed stolen till they are no longer married and the court decided whose car it is.

[Doll]

Enlighten me then, what was her reason??? Am I wrong and it was really about the GC and she just used her daughter to accuse him of that to leave? Was it another man, her boss from work, a secret friend, is she a lesbian and left him for another woman? Did she have a backup plan?
The flood gates are now open. What were her reasons?

felix8787

No, she didn't use her daughter to accuse and she didn't accuse him through court- they made the agreement.
I was talking of the reasons for her to marry an AM- she said she wanted the US citizenship through marriage but she would try to keep the marriage as it is much easier to survive with a husband. Speaking of this- I was talking of it 30 pages ago  but nobody wanted to hear it.
Yous said she really was a wife as she got a job and so on. She got a job to be somebody here.
One more thing- what was the itch for Wayne's wife to rush to work? Guys, the woman is 3 or 4 months (how long? I forgot) in this country and the husband is angry about her not getting the job! Come on, she is an immigrant with language and cultural problems! Ah, ah- she didn't get job! What are you talking of? If she has a caring (like you say) husband why would she be in a hurry?
Lets ask BC or Jet about their wives work.

[Ooooops]

I'm confused - did Wayne file for divorce already or not?   

[OlgaH]

 Plenty of folks have shared their stories here, both good and bad, and while there have been questions and requests for clarification they generally do not result in this type of thread where people are sniping at each other or making accusations about each other which have absolutely nothing to do with the situation being discussed.

FWIW

catzenmouse,

I really don't know what you mean saying "sniping", but all these, as your say, accusations about each other are not accusations, it is all about trust and distrust towards Wayne's story about his problems.

I already expressed my opinion, but I will do it again
When a member, even a new member, come to such boards to share his/her problems (as Wayne's problems) with us trying to get a most effective advice from other people, IMO he will not lie or hide the facts, because every reasonable person understands  if he gives a wrong story or wrong description of his problems he will get a wrong advice. If a person gives a wrong story it is his own problem.  To doubt the honesty of OP, when he willingly shares his problems, is equal to insult  him. Think about new members  when they will try to ask for advice how to resolve a problem and we will be ready to tell them "Sorry, but you are holding something back and now we will tell you what you are holding back" 

[Misha]

I was talking of the reasons for her to marry an AM- she said she wanted the US citizenship through marriage but she would try to keep the marriage as it is much easier to survive with a husband.

To summarize, you have a continuum of women who enter into marriages of convenience:

1. Woman who will leave as soon as she can and take as much as she can;
2. Woman who will leave as soon as she can, not too worried as to how much she can get, other than a green card;
3. Woman who doesn't love her husband, but is willing to put up with him as he does make life easier;
4. Woman who doesn't love her husband, but will only stick with him if he shells out enough to satisfy her tastes.

 

[Doll]

you have a continuum of women

why "have" and why "continuum"
I've just been om RW forum for years and talked to some of RW.

[OlgaH]

One more thing- what was the itch for Wayne's wife to rush to work? Guys, the woman is 3 or 4 months (how long? I forgot) in this country and the husband is angry about her not getting the job! Come on, she is an immigrant with language and cultural problems! Ah, ah- she didn't get job! What are you talking of? If she has a caring (like you say) husband why would she be in a hurry?

Sorry Doll, but you missed the facts  as usually it is your inattentiveness 

Oksana wants to work and to save money for a college education for Yana. 

Oksana is a Hairdresser.  I bought some used salon chairs and have an area where I can install a shampoo sink, as the plumbing is already there.  She will not be able to get a job in a salon until after she gets the Michigan license, but she can practice on friends and family at our home. 

I down loaded all the information that she will need and printed it out for obtaining the Hairdresser license.

I tried to help wife find work.  I printed out many job opening descriptions.  I found an opening for a full time "Front Desk Person" at a very fancy, upscale European spa in the downtown area.  This position would not require a license as she would not be working on customers.  The name of this spa is based on the world famous Russian Ballerina, Anna Pavlova.  What better person could you have greet you as you enter this spa than a beautiful Russian woman, with the cute accent? Wife never even went to check on this position.
 

[Doll]

Misha, you have made a funny classification, I am too tired (cooked for Thanksgiving  ) to really understand the slight difference in 1, 2, 3 or 4 but I will tell you what- a woman will never leave the husband who takes a good care of her and her kids, will never leave home where she is comfortable and safe.

[Ooooops]

The question is.....she is here, she has her green card, would she of ever gotten married to Wayne?

If she's drop dead gorgeous and he's a regular Joe with not much money - no, she wouldn't have.   But I'm not really sure if that's the case.   Where there hard evidence shown in this thread - her photos and his bank statements?   

[Doll]

Olga, Ok, now I remember. So what? She didn't take one job- it happens all the time because we don't like something about this or that job.
BTW do you work? Just curious.

[Misha]

Misha, you have made a funny classification, I am too tired (cooked for Thanksgiving  ) to really understand the slight difference in 1, 2, 3 or 4 but I will tell you what- a woman will never leave the husband who takes a good care of her and her kids, will never leave home where she is comfortable and safe.

You are right, I have to tweak my classification system. I will move my 4 to the top and all yours at the bottom: "A woman who stays with her husband because he takes care of her and her kids. She does not love him but she feels comfortable and safe. Over the years, she may grow to love him."

[Doll]

Ooooops , O is much younger than Wayne, I think 20 years or so.
Oh , no- she had her daughter when she was 19 so 19+18 is 37, Wayne I think in his 60s. More than 20.
 So no unless we'll see the bank statements with lots of money.
So no.
Like many RW who marry AM would never marry them if they were American women and live here.

[OlgaH]

a woman will never leave the husband who takes a good care of her and her kids, will never leave home where she is comfortable and safe.

If she doesn't love her husband one day she will leave... or not...  One woman before leaving her unloved husband will try to get so much as she can from him and then she will leave him. Other woman will continue to live with her unloved husband just using him...

[OlgaH]

BTW do you work? Just curious.

Yes, I do.

[catzenmouse]

<throwing my hands up and walking away from this as it is obvious that too many people are too convinced they are the only ones who are right>

Happy Thanksgiving and good bye

[Ooooops]

One woman before leaving her unloved husband will try to get so much as she can from him and then she will leave him.

She can (legally) take from him only as much as the law allows.   And Femida wears blindfold for the reason, you know.      And if wife takes more than lawful then she's just a criminal and should be prosecuted - love or no love... 

[Doll]

She can (legally) take from him only as much as the law allows.   And Femida wears blindfold for the reason, you know.      And if wife takes more than lawful then she's just a criminal and should be prosecuted - love or no love... 

It is time to b-tch the laws that allow wives to get what they are entitled to.

[OlgaH]

So what?

So what... Wayne was trying to do his best helping her in her adjusting... and brought it upon himself 

As we say in Russia she paid him back according to Russian saying "Вашим же салом вам по мусалам"

[OlgaH]

She can (legally) take from him only as much as the law allows.   And Femida wears blindfold for the reason, you know.        

I even can guess who put blindfold on Femida's eyes and made holes in law in such matter 

[Ooooops]

I even can guess who put blindfold on Femida's eyes and made holes in law in such matter 

Who?   

[felix8787]

No, she didn't use her daughter to accuse and she didn't accuse him through court- they made the agreement.
I was talking of the reasons for her to marry an AM- she said she wanted the US citizenship through marriage but she would try to keep the marriage as it is much easier to survive with a husband. Speaking of this- I was talking of it 30 pages ago  but nobody wanted to hear it.
Yous said she really was a wife as she got a job and so on. She got a job to be somebody here.
One more thing- what was the itch for Wayne's wife to rush to work? Guys, the woman is 3 or 4 months (how long? I forgot) in this country and the husband is angry about her not getting the job! Come on, she is an immigrant with language and cultural problems! Ah, ah- she didn't get job! What are you talking of? If she has a caring (like you say) husband why would she be in a hurry?
Lets ask BC or Jet about their wives work.

So basically she is in a loveless relationship for a GC.........or is she hoping that one day she will love him? Are they still together in this loveless convenience relationship?

[Russiangirl]

   
 she moved out of his bedroom the very next day...  She married him ONLY because of the green card, then started looking for ways to get away once it arrived. 

If I may venture a suggestion... She moved out of his bedroom the very next day? I don't mean to be unkind, but inevitable guess is that perhaps the marrital bed was not quite what the newlywed wife had hoped for?

Instead of looking for sinister motives, perhaps the explanation is much simpler.

   
 Wayne, You are still responsible for the car no matter who has it... Imagine, for example, that she doesn't keep the car insurance current and gets in a big accident where someone is injured.  As owner of the car, you will be named in any subsequent lawsuit...

Agreed. Who eventually keeps the car is a secondary issue. Until it's settled, and actual possession (from her to him) or title ownership (from him to her) transfered, Wayne should make sure his car insurance is current.