Statistical abberation

[KenC]

You truly are pathetic, Maxx.  Posting supporting posts from dead men and now an anonymous "old timer".     It's like quick sand now, the more you twist and turn, the deeper (and dirtier) you get.

You have no "right" to post lies, innuendos and project your sewer views onto me and my circumstances regardless of what your mystery man says, if he is even real.  Give it up and go away before you embarrass yourself any further.
KenC

[acrzybear]

Something from an old timer you all would welcome with open arms.

Very true.

AJ mentioned camaraderie. That has been missing if it ever was here for sometime. Just take a look a Wayne's "wife split" thread. This nice man was dissected six ways from Sunday when he posted his story. Yep, there is uneven treatment given out by the "high roaders" of this place.


Maxx

  Uneven treatment given out by high roaders? I am not sure what catagory you would place me in, but has there been some leeway given to the folks that have been here since this board was started up?, I would say some latitude has been shown to them in some situations, but over all I would say no. 

There is a difference between hazing and retribution, I see it all of the time with my Officers.  The veteran Officers don't trust the rookies because they have not proven themselves and the rookies are eager to prove themselves or they think they know everything and the veterans are "old school" and don't know what the hell they are talking about. 

 I posted a "trip report" more as a joke then anything serious, the reason is that I really did not want to everyone's B.S about how I should have done things, about how I did this or that wrong and basically turn the trip report in to an inquisition.  When I posted my first 2 trip reports I was given some constructive criticism and told some things I did not really want to hear, but it was given with the intention to assist me with my travels. 

 Now when someone posts a trip report, certain members of this board are like a pack of piranha on an injured animal.  I took a year away from this forum because of some things I had to deal with at work and because the tone of the board was changing.  I see that it has not gotten better.

[GoodOlBoy]

Sorry KenC to interupt your thread, BUT...Since this condescending BOZO decided to post this here, I for one, just wanted to rebut it.

  This thread is a perfect example of why i don't visit here often anymore.

 

.....its about GENERAL board content.

There was a time when many of the boards were pretty wild,,
but still the undercurrent was one of common comradre
and more  a sharing of the experiences,and perhaps something learned from them.........

i don't watch  jerry springer, its not my kind of entertainment at all.....A similar scenerio seems to run thru RW forums,,......

these type of personal back and forths,  were always around,,
but just arnt my cup of tea, and they've become more the norm,than the exception.
my wife has always wondered why i found anything of interest here ..
maybe she's been right all along.......

life has been good for us,,and i hope for you all........

if so,, i'd like to read more supportive threads..
but i have little hope of that..lol

My little heart breaks that RWD no longer meets your lofty standards for entertainment or enlightenment.

You sir, are like a couple of other contemptuous clowns that post here.

Oh Yes we hear it loud and clear.....The I have seen it all, done it all, been to Russia 25 times, so I know everything member's (Messiah Complex).

We have also heard this one to: "I've got mine, so I don't need this place (RWD) anymore".

I never attack another members wife, all I will say in response to your wife's comment is: "Maybe she should get down on her hands and knees and thank God for forums like RWD. Otherwise her happiness here in the GoodOl' USA would have never materialized because you would have probably been scammed by some other FSU woman and walked away bitter like so many others have before the invention of such forums like Dan's".


GOB

BTW....Don't worry, while you are off to the races, the rest of us will continue to trudge along here at RWD and try to help some Newbies stay out of trouble.

[KenC]

GOB,
No need to apologize as this thread has wondered far off it's intended coarse.  But I think you got AJ wrong.  AJ is a good guy and has given some very valuable advice over the years.  He was not attacking the general membership here, but the back biters.
KenC

[acrzybear]

Sorry KenC to interupt your thread, BUT...Since this condensending BOZO decided to post this here, I for one, just wanted to rebut it.



My little heart breaks that RWD no longer meets your lofty standards for entertainment or enlightenment.

You sir, are like a couple of other contemptuous clowns that post here.

Oh Yes.....The I have seen it all, done it all, been to Russia 25 times, so I know everything member (Messiah Complex).

We have also heard this one to: "I've got mine, so I don't need this place (RWD) anymore".

I never attack another members wife, all I will say in response to your wife's comment is: "Maybe she should get down on her hands and knees and thank God for forums like RWD. Otherwise her happiness here in the GoodOl' USA would have never materialized because you would have probably been scammed by some FSU woman and walked away bitter like so many have before the invention of such forums like Dan's".

GOB

 GOB
 You never attack another mans wife, yet what do you know about AJ? Do you know how he met his wife? Did he meet his wife prior or after RWD? Do you have any idea of how AJ pursued his wife?  

 So Bill (I presume that is whom you are talking about) has visited FSU 25 times and has not found a wife, so what?  You got lucky and met your wife rather quickly, not everyone is so fortunate.

All I have seen you do since I have returned to this forum is harp on other people and disagree with everyone that does not fall into your line of thinking.

 

[AugustD]

I fall into the category of "read a lot but post little"...lurker I think is more appropriate.  I rarely can think of something worth saying in advice because frankly I haven't figured out American women let alone Russian women or Ukrainian women so I am no expert on such subjects.  Also I do not wish to interrupt this forum to play the E-Rodney King and ask for all to "just get along" either.

My point is that this division based on personalities stops me from posting.  I have a Russian woman and a new 10 year old Russian son coming to the US in 2 months and I have questions...lots...I want to understand what moves I should make with schools and should I replenish him with toys he is leaving behind and should I get an English Teacher and how do I deal with a father that does not want to sign permission to leave the country and and and...

I am afraid to put my personal questions out there.  This is very close to my heart and very dear to me and I cannot handle sniping taking place over my new family.  There is no way I can use this forum and the plethora of knowledge I NEED.  There is no way.

I am not alone.  Lots of others stop because of the aggressive nature of this community.  I dont mind someone putting one of those bat things to my mistakes.  I normally need one.  I dont mind differing opinions because that is cool..that sereba or whatever her name was was a great example of that.  She could p!ss me off so fast but she was smart as a whip.  Then she starts posting personal photos of others families on the internet?  That is psycho.  So ultimately not so cool.  KenC I respect, I/O, groovlsk, and many others but this thread has gone too far.  It is the divisive nature of the community.  Not everyone of course but the nature is divisive and it gets pretty nasty.

A guy has hung out his personal life and it has been ugly what has followed.  I have rambled and added little to this discussion and for that I am sorry.  If you can bottle some of the courage you are showing recovering from what you have faced recently KenC please let me know.  I will be first in line.

FWIW...I struck gold in Kazan Russia.  I hit the lottery.  I could be on Elena's models for the next decade and not find this woman again.  Pure luck.  I am not as charming as AJ nor as persuasive as I/O.  Pure freaking lottery luck.  Wouldn't happen twice in a lifetime.  I pray that we continue to grow in our upcoming marriage and I can be a good father and husband to two wonderful people giving up their lives to join me.

KenC as I said on one of the first pages of this thread, I am sorry to hear the direction your marriage went and I wish you well.  I hope you can overlook some of the people baiting you to respond and can continue with your story.  Thank you for having the guts to share your story publicly as I could not do the same.

[Maxx2]

I never attack another members wife, all I will say in response to your wife's comment is: "Maybe she should get down on her hands and knees and thank God for forums like RWD. Otherwise her happiness here in the GoodOl' USA would have never materialized because you would have probably been scammed by some FSU woman and walked away bitter like so many others have before the invention of such forums like Dan's".

Once upon a time on a Planet called Love certain members here called a wife of another member here a "c" and a "w". I can see why this man and AJ are hesitant to post here. Leopolds do not change their spots.


Maxx

[Sculpto]

Ken,
I have avoided posting in your thread because I don't really know you or your story but tonight I am sitting here taking a break from the lathe and there hasn't been much activity on the forum so I decided to get caught up and see what was sustaining the thread.

I am very sorry people have attacked you this way.  It is really uncalled for.  I have been getting more than my share as I am sure you noticed. 

So what the heck is going on people?  Is everyone just more frustrated than normal because of the way things are going in the country?  Are we all stressed out about our jobs and homes and lifestyles and using the forum as a place to relatively anonymously vent our fears on relative strangers?  Not looking for answers to the questions, just proposing that people give it some thought.

I have no idea.  But when I read about guys who are afraid to post their questions because of what they see here in Ken's thread and I might guess also some of the responses I have gotten to my story I can not say that I blame them.  Not everyone can take it.

But I do think it would be worth it for everyone to think before they post and especially think how they would feel if the tables were turned.

Ken, my best to you.  As an expert in breaking up I can totally empathise with all that you are going through.  The silver lining is that better days are ahead.  Keep the chin up. 

[LiveFromUkraine]

I don' t really hit this forum much anymore.  Nor others like it just because of what AJ stated and life is much better offline with my wife.  


I wanted to post on here to say one thing.  I won't get into the crap fest that others decided to bring just out of revenge.

Ken is a real man.  Look at how he is treating the breakup and how he rebounded.  We all come across problems in life. These are the times that define us.  The way Ken is handling this situation tells me Ken is a man and I can see why Lena fell in love with him.  For those that think Lena did it for other reasons have their heads up their asses.  It takes a lot for a marriage to work.  Sometimes Love isn't enough especially when two people are at different stages in life.  I can totally see what Ken stated when he was stressed regarding the financial hit this economy took on him and many others.  In fact, I could relate to how we, as men, can make things like that much worst because our own egos.  I know I am guilty of this many times.


I congratulate you on your resolve and know you will be better than ever.  I don't think you made a mistake nor a bad choice.  Those times are what makes us who we are.  We grow as a person because we keep moving forward.  Those that stay in the past only get more jealous of others living their lives.  You can even see it from people in this thread.  They are not even worth replying to.


I didn't post here to dissect anything but to say that I can understand the reasons why.


Forget the sadness.  I see it as a exciting time for Ken.  A new business, a new life and who knows where it will take you.  Exciting stuff is coming for you.




Thomas

[Makkin]

  Aj is one cool dude.

Makkin

[acrzybear]

AugustD

 When I first posted here in 2005 I had no clue as to what the hell I was doing, but various members of this board took the time to set me straight and help me out.  The difference is that even when they where hitting me (or others) with the clue bat, it was never mean spirited and they only wished to help a "newbie".  Well time moves on and people find different things of interest and the the next "generation" takes over, and the board has become more negative.

  Prime example there was a member here that had a business in Russia and had a heart attack and ran into some financial difficulties.  Myself and several other members were in a position to help and we did without him ever asking, I would not see that happening now.  I ran into some unexpected problems in Russia and JB helped me out without a seconds hesitation and I had only met him face to face one time.

 This used to be a community, now it's a viper pit.
 

[Ade]

I have to shake my head at some of the hypocrisy in this thread. I mean seriously, the "tough love " mantra that I hear so much is usually just an excuse for some opinionated, aggressive and antagonistic bullies, uh sorry, "real men" to vent at a new guy or someone they just plain disagree with. Guys can try to make Ken into a martyr if they want but I'm sure he anticipated a lot more "tough love" here than he's actually got and a lot less than he would dish out himself if the tables were turned.

Now here are a couple of "tough love" questions for Ken; do you consider the failure of your relationship to be primarily your fault? Did your illness and financial stresses bring out the worse in you and your wife just didn't like what she saw?

[LiveFromUkraine]

opinionated, aggressive and antagonistic bullies

I can understand with a name of SeriouslyJaded, you wouldn't understand how a person can dust themselves off and make themselves even better.  We call it moving on which I doubt, based on the name you use, you are able to understand.

As for your "Tough Love" questions, it seems they have already been answered.   How many times would you like the man to say the same thing over and over again?

[KenC]

I'm sure he anticipated a lot more "tough love" here than he's actually got and a lot less than he would dish out himself if the tables were turned.

You might want to run this "theory" you present here to ScottinCrimea.  Or if you even had read his comments here, up thread you would know that your comment is BS.

Now here are a couple of "tough love" questions for Ken; do you consider the failure of your relationship to be primarily your fault?

This question kind of stumped me to be honest.  I never have been asked about "fault" nor did I ever even consider that our divorce was anymore my fault than Lena's.

Did your illness and financial stresses bring out the worse in you and your wife just didn't like what she saw?

i think I have explained this point quite well.
KenC

[LiveFromUkraine]

I'm sure to the shock of many on the board here, KenC and I had a great conversation by telephone yesterday about our current situations and he had great words of support and comfort for me.  He's truly a class act.

He asked me, if given the chance, would I do it all again.  Despite the difficulties I am now going through that I have shared with others, my answer to him was, "Definitely!".

One can't dismiss 5 years (and in KenC's case 10 years) of the journey with all the wonderful experiences and memories just because the journey takes an unexpected path later on.

Do I think that life experience had something to do with my breakup, even with "only" a 15 year age gap?  Looking back on things, I believe it did.

Scott, I am really sorry to hear this.  Are you still in the states or do you have plans on going back to Ukraine?  Personally, I will visit Ukraine for a couple of weeks or a month at the most.  I will never move back. 



Thomas

[Ade]

You might want to run this "theory" you present here to ScottinCrimea.  Or if you even had read his comments here, up thread you would know that your comment is BS.

Well, if Scott wasn't one of your forum buddies I would concede the point but he is isn't he? Even so, if you hadn't gone through a recent break up yourself and gained a little empathy I wouldn't have put it passed you to have given him a little "tough love" too. It would have certainly have fit what I've seen of your MO.

Come on Ken, you and the JB-like posters all post in similar aggressive and antagonistic ways, you know and surely you are not so stupid as to believe your own rhetoric on "tough love".  

This question kind of stumped me to be honest.  I never have been asked about "fault" nor did I ever even consider that our divorce was anymore my fault than Lena's.

Okay, let me put this another way, given the same financial and health circumstances do you think that there was anything you could have done to prevent the failure of your marriage?

[Ade]

I can understand with a name of SeriouslyJaded, you wouldn't understand how a person can dust themselves off and make themselves even better.  We call it moving on which I doubt, based on the name you use, you are able to understand.

Nice try but I would be careful on reading too much into internet pseudonyms. I had an international marriage for a little longer than Ken which, btw, also ended amicably and we remain friends to this day.

[tim 360]

I sympathize with AugustD who has relevant questions and would like to post them but does not want to get the attacks he might get from some.  Probably he would prefer answers without the BS.  I would recommend that he simply PM some of the members whom he thinks will give him a good answer because he is correct--this board HAS become much more mean spirited than ever.  AJ and Crzybear are correct that there are some "know it all" posters who jump all over others.  Dan should be weeding them out.  Let them post their swill elsewhere.  It is a shame they are keeping new and veteran members from participating.  Maybe now RWD is a "Big Board" but there is a meaness to it now which was not here just a year ago.  The ghouls have taken over and its like the WWF....ready to rumble.

Just look at KenC and his thread which was I believe and honest expression of how his 10 year marriage failed.  It took a big man to tell his story and just look at the mess here.  It was a disgrace how some of these vipers replied and continue to.  Probably they are just plain miserable focks who need to vent their bitterness on the internet.  Send them somewhere else to vent their poop. 

[Admin]

I sympathize with AugustD who has relevant questions and would like to post them but does not want to get the attacks he might get from some.  Probably he would prefer answers without the BS.  I would recommend that he simply PM some of the members whom he thinks will give him a good answer because he is correct--this board HAS become much more mean spirited than ever.  AJ and Crzybear are correct that there are some "know it all" posters who jump all over others.  Dan should be weeding them out.  Let them post their swill elsewhere.  It is a shame they are keeping new and veteran members from participating.  Maybe now RWD is a "Big Board" but there is a meaness to it now which was not here just a year ago.  The ghouls have taken over and its like the WWF....ready to rumble.

Just look at KenC and his thread which was I believe and honest expression of how his 10 year marriage failed.  It took a big man to tell his story and just look at the mess here.  It was a disgrace how some of these vipers replied and continue to.  Probably they are just plain miserable focks who need to vent their bitterness on the internet.  Send them somewhere else to vent their poop. 

Tim (and others),

I confess that I have not been "weeding them out." I am not sure exactly WHO you reference, but it is true, I am not "weeding" anyone out. Take this past week for example. I have hardly even read RWD. Popped in on occasion. Been too busy grappling with the loss of my father a week ago. Somehow "weeding them out" at RWD did not make it into the top of my priority list.

As for the longer term, I *am* doing my best to follow the tenets of the RWD Vision, found here -- http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?pid=33 - which references "maximum inclusivity." Are you suggesting a change in the RWD Vision?

Out of curiosity - what are YOU doing to make a difference in our community?

- Dan

[Ade]

I sympathize with AugustD who has relevant questions and would like to post them but does not want to get the attacks he might get from some.  Probably he would prefer answers without the BS.  I would recommend that he simply PM some of the members whom he thinks will give him a good answer because he is correct--this board HAS become much more mean spirited than ever.  AJ and Crzybear are correct that there are some "know it all" posters who jump all over others.  Dan should be weeding them out.  Let them post their swill elsewhere.  It is a shame they are keeping new and veteran members from participating.  Maybe now RWD is a "Big Board" but there is a meaness to it now which was not here just a year ago.  The ghouls have taken over and its like the WWF....ready to rumble.

Well, I found this forum just over a year ago and, if anything, it was worse back then than it is now. Several of the more aggressive and antagonistic posters seem to be pretty much absent of late.

Just look at KenC and his thread which was I believe and honest expression of how his 10 year marriage failed.  It took a big man to tell his story and just look at the mess here.  It was a disgrace how some of these vipers replied and continue to.  Probably they are just plain miserable focks who need to vent their bitterness on the internet.  Send them somewhere else to vent their poop. 

Yes, just look at KenC. Some people see him as one of the "mean spirited attackers" as you put it. Amazing how a shift in perspective can make all the difference.

[Admin]

Once upon a time on a Planet called Love certain members here called a wife of another member here a "c" and a "w". I can see why this man and AJ are hesitant to post here. Leopolds do not change their spots.


Maxx

>>Once upon a time on a Planet called Love certain members here called a wife of another member here a "c" and a "w".<<

Were you there Dave? Did you actually READ those words?!?

Are you aware of how long ago that exchange occurred?

The exchange transpired at PL in October of 2002. It was replayed on RWG in ... oh, I am not sure - 2005 or so.

Since I was a part of it, I know EXACTLY what was written - and still have copies of it.

This merely shows, again, how petty you have become (or always were). Not only do you want to trumpet your own perceived injustices - you now bring into play other's - and have no idea of what you are referencing.

Get help Dave - soon. You've lost it.

- Dan

[KenC]

I have been thinking about this thread and the line of thinking expressed here that RWD has become a mean and unfeeling community.  I have to now disagree with that characterization.  There has been an overwhelming amount of support posted here with many many PM's of support.  We must not let a handful of mean spirited and classless members whom have chosen to take me to task for my posting style at this time deter us from the fact that the mass majority here have been kind and supportive.

I also knew that when I made the original post that some here would act like hyenas and look to feed on my current situation with their attacks.  Obtaining some sort of retribution when a man is down takes a rather small person.  Unfortunately, we have some small minded people as members here. But let us not let the classless comments from a few blind us to the fact that there is a core community here that are helpful, considerate and very caring.
KenC

[ECOCKS]

Pursuing this on KenC's marital status thread is neither constructive for the OP, helpful to addreessing the concerns from AJ nor likely to accomplish any sort of meaningful dialogue towards easing the atmosphere of the board.

This badly needs to be shifted to its own thread for discussion.

[Ade]

Pursuing this on KenC's marital status thread is neither constructive for the OP, helpful to addreessing the concerns from AJ nor likely to accomplish any sort of meaningful dialogue towards easing the atmosphere of the board.

This badly needs to be shifted to its own thread for discussion.

Possibly, but really, I have to take issue with those that are portraying Ken as the good guy martyr dishing out his altruistic "tough love" and everyone that has something to say to the contrary are "back biters". Seriously, what a joke.

But I guess that Ken is a big boy now and can take it as well as dish it out. His sympathy inducing comment about his current situation is stretching it a little though as he keeps on stressing that it was 8 or 9 months ago that they split very amicably and that life is just hunky dory now and "better than ever".

Whatever, I'm just classless I guess. 

[KenC]

Whatever, I'm just classless I guess. 

I guess you are too.
KenC