Realities of FSUW

[Zhena]

Somebody here said he is unemployed but very happy.
You can be that way if you re single,or if you have enough savings not to work at all. Otherwise who will  pay the bills and for food and etc for the future family? Maybe your wife? You re searching for RW-I can  accept that she has some convertible degree and will start to work as soon as possible. But will she be happy about the situation when she has to tear her butt and you re enjoying your unemployed life? I doubt. I can suggest that she will leave you soon,not cos the money,but cos you dont do anything to improve. It is very irresponsible,to have a family and be so relaxed.

[brucen36]

Is the majority always right? Humor IMHO is like finding a spouse, you don't have to please all people, just the one you are with 

As I said before, the majority is all we have when considering discussions or trying to find answers a priori.  Sure you can find the one spouse that is not part of the rule....but that is after the fact.

[Sculpto]

what is this obsession with improvement?

I rejected millions when I could have easily had them.  I can still to this day go crawling back to my Father and ask for a job and be president of a big company tomorrow..  Is that going to make me happy?  NO

I am happy I can go to the park or the beach or the mountains whenever I want.  If my woman is obsessed with constant improvement financially, well, you are right, it won't last long because I will not stay in it.  Life is way too short to spend it working all the time.  There are too many beautiful places to see, too many interesting things to do and experience..

This is an extreme example.. but i once met a family when travelling.. this family travelled.. Dad, Mom and two kids.. they were artisans and travelled the world making crafts and selling them wherever they went.. they had been moving around for five eyars when I met them and I occasionally get a word from them from some new place, 7 years after I met them.. some of the happiest people I ever met.

Point is.. there are all kinds of ways to make a living and enjoy this world.. but.. sometimes it seems when discussing such things with FSUW there is only ONE way to do things and any derivation from that one way is not normal and bad.  Such a narrow view of the world is truly sad.

[Misha]

As I said before, the majority is all we have when considering discussions or trying to find answers a priori.  Sure you can find the one spouse that is not part of the rule....but that is after the fact.

The fact of the matter is that nobody tries to please the "majority." You find friends who like you, you find a wife/husband that you can please, you find a profession that suits your skills.... Nobody tries to please a majority all of the time or even most of the time  

[brucen36]

The fact of the matter is that nobody tries to please the "majority." You find friends who like you, you find a wife/husband that you can please, you find a profession that suits your skills.... Nobody tries to please a majority all of the time or even most of the time  

Actually that's not true.  In fact most people use the majority as a guideline before making their decisions.  And most decisions end up within the majority, which is why it was a majority in the first place.  Anyways my initial point is the reason you made a certain decision is not necessarily what you rationalize it to be in your head.  i.e a woman may think she chose a man because he was so caring, etc etc, and that certainly contributed, but other things like symmetry, height, wallet, all played a role in the total decision whether she likes to think those factors played a role or not.  The question is which qualities are stronger influences, character or monetary success?  I would say monetary success plays more of a role than you would like to think.

[brucen36]

The fact of the matter is that nobody tries to please the "majority." 

This in fact further proves the point.  No one consciously tries to please the "majority".  Yet a majority exists.  All people who fall within the majority will rationalize different reasons for their choice...these reasons are all fluff - the real influencing powers are the commonalities that made all of them choose the majority.  A statistical evaluation of these commonalities will show the true influences.  These types of analyses have been done.

[Misha]

Actually that's not true.  In fact most people use the majority as a guideline before making their decisions.

I agree that they will seek to conform to social norms, but this won't necessarily be those of an absolute majority. A member of a gang will seek to conform to what his gangs does (the majority in his social circle), but his conformity won't fit, unfortunately, what the majority of people in his city or country think.

Anyways my initial point is the reason you made a certain decision is not necessarily what you rationalize it to be in your head.  i.e a woman may think she chose a man because he was so caring, etc etc, and that certainly contributed, but other things like symmetry, height, wallet, all played a role in the total decision whether she likes to think those factors played a role or not.

I agree, partially. Yes, she may not be fully aware of all the factors that led to her decision. However, there is the other danger that we will impose on her choices intentions that were not there. We could say, for example, "since I believe that all women choose a man for his money, then any woman who is saying this was not important is either lying or deluding herself or will eventually come to her senses."

The question is which qualities are stronger influences, character or monetary success?  I would say monetary success plays more of a role than you would like to think.

Let me guess, you certainly think that you have much monetary success  

[Misha]

Yet a majority exists. 

Where? See my previous post. The "majority" can be in your circle of friends, can be in your neighborhood, can be in your city, can be in your state/province, country, etc.... The views of the "majority" in San Francisco, for example, may not be the same as the majority in Texas  :evil:

[brucen36]

Let me guess, you certainly think that you have much monetary success  

Me??  Hardly.  I am not well to do at all.  I am only a seeker of the truth, whether that truth underscores my position or not.

[Zhena]

what is this obsession with improvement?

I rejected millions when I could have easily had them.  I can still to this day go crawling back to my Father and ask for a job and be president of a big company tomorrow..  Is that going to make me happy?  NO

I am happy I can go to the park or the beach or the mountains whenever I want.  If my woman is obsessed with constant improvement financially, well, you are right, it won't last long because I will not stay in it.  Life is way too short to spend it working all the time.  There are too many beautiful places to see, too many interesting things to do and experience..

This is an extreme example.. but i once met a family when travelling.. this family travelled.. Dad, Mom and two kids.. they were artisans and travelled the world making crafts and selling them wherever they went.. they had been moving around for five eyars when I met them and I occasionally get a word from them from some new place, 7 years after I met them.. some of the happiest people I ever met.

Point is.. there are all kinds of ways to make a living and enjoy this world.. but.. sometimes it seems when discussing such things with FSUW there is only ONE way to do things and any derivation from that one way is not normal and bad.  Such a narrow view of the world is truly sad.

You know,I think the travelling idea is awesome. I am crazy about the travelling. What money that family travelled on? The crafts they selled? What kind of crafts? I like to travel in comfort and would prefer the millions to travel all around the world. But if its possible without big money, would do that too,cos its very interesting.
Though you have to think about the future and your kids.
I dont nderstand the happines of observing the stars when yo have the empty wallet. Then ,by this philosophy,the homeless people-the most happy ones. They free as the birds and have the opportunity to observe the stas as much as they want. Would I like to be the one of them? Never.

[Misha]

Me??  Hardly.  I am not well to do at all.  I am only a seeker of the truth, whether that truth underscores my position or not.

Here is another example of the dangers of following the majority. What do you think the majority of Americans would think about WM seeking RW? I would wager that it would be hardly a positive evaluation  :evil: Yet, some still seek Russian wives. Why? Shouldn't they conform to the majority?

[Sculpto]

Actually that's not true.  In fact most people use the majority as a guideline before making their decisions.  And most decisions end up within the majority, which is why it was a majority in the first place.  Anyways my initial point is the reason you made a certain decision is not necessarily what you rationalize it to be in your head.  i.e a woman may think she chose a man because he was so caring, etc etc, and that certainly contributed, but other things like symmetry, height, wallet, all played a role in the total decision whether she likes to think those factors played a role or not.  The question is which qualities are stronger influences, character or monetary success?  I would say monetary success plays more of a role than you would like to think.

The majority is boring.  It is the exceptional people that make life interesting.  

Besides.. who wants to live their life like a sheep?

[brucen36]

I agree, partially. Yes, she may not be fully aware of all the factors that led to her decision. However, there is the other danger that we will impose on her choices intentions that were not there. We could say, for example, "since I believe that all women choose a man for his money, then any woman who is saying this was not important is either lying or deluding herself or will eventually come to her senses."

Let me guess, you certainly think that you have much monetary success  

I would hardly call this a danger.  First of all, remove "belief" from the equation.  Simply look at the statistics.  If the statistics say that 90% of the women put high monetary success as first on their list, then case 'x' has a high probability of falling within this majority.  It's not an absolute truth, but a liklihood.  And then it is fair to say that in all liklihood, such a woman who says it was not important is in fact deluding herself - I emphasize liklihood.  10% chance she is not.

[Zhena]

Well,lets say  everybody gets what they want.
I like the winners,not the quiters. I like the competitive men also. Of course I will look for those only.
Who doesnt need anything exceptm the sky above the head,will attract the same man I guess.

[Misha]

I would hardly call this a danger.  First of all, remove "belief" from the equation.  Simply look at the statistics.  If the statistics say that 90% of the women put high monetary success as first on their list, then case 'x' has a high probability of falling within this majority.  It's not an absolute truth, but a liklihood.  And then it is fair to say that in all liklihood, such a woman who says it was not important is in fact deluding herself - I emphasize liklihood.  10% chance she is not.

How does it go, there are liars, damned liars and statistics. Depending on how you design your questionnaire and how you go about choosing a sample, you can produce statistics to prove just about anything  :evil:

[brucen36]

Here is another example of the dangers of following the majority. What do you think the majority of Americans would think about WM seeking RW? I would wager that it would be hardly a positive evaluation  :evil: Yet, some still seek Russian wives. Why? Shouldn't they conform to the majority?

I think the majority of Americans would say those seeking online dating are 'losers' much less seeking wives oversea.  But we would have to do a survey to see the reality.  But so what?  Majority does not mean you have to conform, but the liklihood is that you will.  That is the definition.  Those of us here looking for Russian wives are in the minority....so what?

[brucen36]

How does it go, there are liars, damned liars and statistics. Depending on how you design your questionnaire and how you go about choosing a sample, you can produce statistics to prove just about anything  :evil:

But it's all we have.  It's not perfect, but it's certainly better than subjective opinions based on one person's anecdotal evidence or someone "IMHO"'s in their experience with meeting oh let's say even a hundred russian women.  It's essentially meaningless in so far as trying to evaluate what is the "truth".

[Sculpto]

You know,I think the travelling idea is awesome. I am crazy about the travelling. What money that family travelled on? The crafts they selled? What kind of crafts? I like to travel in comfort and would prefer the millions to travel all around the world. But if its possible without big money, would do that too,cos its very interesting.
Though you have to think about the future and your kids.
I dont nderstand the happines of observing the stars when yo have the empty wallet. Then ,by this philosophy,the homeless people-the most happy ones. They free as the birds and have the opportunity to observe the stas as much as they want. Would I like to be the one of them? Never.

Comfort is very relative Zhena.  Some people would be satisfied with nothing less than 5 stars while others are perfectly happy with a hammock and a thatched roof.  The family i mentioned was the thatched roof type.  Their kids were amazing.  I have never met young kids with a greater curiosity about the world than these two.  Imagine all the amazing things they had seen before they were even ten!  In fact, I have an artist friend that grew up that way.. never attended school until University.. he is an amazing person, really well adapted to whatever situation comes up.  There are all kinds of ways to raise kids also and frankly given the current state of affairs in the school system in this country I am personally not very inclined to put my kids, when I have them, into this school system.  

The family I spoke of made silver and gold jewlery.. they went to Colombia and bought emeralds.. Brazil for other kinds of stones.. they were always buying materials and organized some of their travelling around the places where exotic materials could be purchased directly from the miners.  They carried small torches, hand tools and a tiny centrifuge for casting.  They traveled by bus mostly.  They had stores that would buy their stuff as well as selling in craft markets and fairs.

Regarding your comments about star gazing.. sure lots of people can not live that way without some sense of home security.  But, isn't that just conditioning?  You claim to be some kind of psychologist, so, you should be able to answer that question.  If you have been told all your life that you must have a certain style of security it can be very difficult to break such a pattern.  But, that doesn't mean you can't.  Anyone can do anything they wish.. its called free will.  It doesn't mean everyhtig will be a bed of roses.. but.. if you wish to have a certain way of life that does not conform with your upbringing and social conditioning any person has the power to change that if they really want it.  

That is what makes people exceptional.  And, in my eyes, truly successfull.  Excercizing your free will, in whatever direction you choose.

[brucen36]

The majority is boring.  It is the exceptional people that make life interesting.  

Besides.. who wants to live their life like a sheep?

In that case, everyone will strive to be the exceptional minority, in which case that becomes the majority.  It's inescapable.

[Misha]

But it's all we have.  It's not perfect, but it's certainly better than subjective opinions based on one person's anecdotal evidence or someone "IMHO"'s in their experience with meeting oh let's say even a hundred russian women.  It's essentially meaningless in so far as trying to evaluate what is the "truth".

I am curious. Are you married? Have you been to the FSU?

[Sculpto]

But it's all we have.  It's not perfect, but it's certainly better than subjective opinions based on one person's anecdotal evidence or someone "IMHO"'s in their experience with meeting oh let's say even a hundred russian women.  It's essentially meaningless in so far as trying to evaluate what is the "truth".

Where are you getting your statistics first of all.

Second, who cares?  If you base your decisions and actions on statistical evidence of one thing or another.. sorry but that is not living.  Might as well go ahead and dig the hole and jump in.  

I remember an episode from "All In the Family", sorry to the FSUWs who will not have a chance at remembering this..

Archie sees Michael outting on his shoes a certain way.. one shoe on, tie the shoe, other shoe on tie the shoe.  He chastises Michael for putting his shoes on wrong and goes on to explain.. right shoe on first, left shoe second, tie right shoe, tie left shoe...

That is what I see coming from your posts Bruce.. and you could not be further from any kind of reality I would want to live in.

[Sculpto]

In that case, everyone will strive to be the exceptional minority, in which case that becomes the majority.  It's inescapable.

....................

I am curious. Are you married? Have you been to the FSU?

I cant wait for the answer to this.. what is your age also Bruce?

[brucen36]

I am curious. Are you married? Have you been to the FSU?

Not married yet.  But yes I have been to the FSU.  Only once.  However, I have spoken to many many FSU people online.  But why curious?  Even if I had never known or spoken to a russian person in my life, it would not change the argument about majority and best approximation of truth.  I guess the only point I was making was that just because a person vehemently says they went for character, and genuinely believes it, does not make it the sole and true motive.  

[Misha]

Not married yet.  But yes I have been to the FSU.  Only once.  However, I have spoken to many many FSU people online. But why curious?  

You wrote: "It's not perfect, but it's certainly better than subjective opinions based on one person's anecdotal evidence or someone "IMHO"'s in their experience with meeting oh let's say even a hundred russian women."

This is usually what men who have spent little time with Russian or in the FSU say  I did not use statistics, but I was right 

[brucen36]

Where are you getting your statistics first of all.

What statistics?  I haven't quoted any stat.