Gifts - first meeting

[OlgaH]

To  give her the only one expensive present in 1t day is worth than give her cheap flours every day. Ask what she likes and try to surprise her. Your efforts will be appreciated.

ask her and if her answer will be diamonds - try to surprise her and impress in the first day of your meeting face to face after several weeks of emails and phone calls   

[gemini]

Personally I don't think to give a book at first meeting is a great idea.  Everybody now can go on line and find all information about the place where person lives.
I think flowers and candies are good enough.

My husband brought the nice books about Chicago when he visited me first time, there were mostly the pictures in the books. He brought one for  my parents too. I spent lots of time looking at the pictures, imagining the life in Chicago. I have to admit, I didn't have a computer that time. Some of my friends in Russia still don't have a computer or use it only to send the emails because it is expensive to have unlimited internet. I thing even you have internet, the books are different, they are like your personal friends.

[lovelyannie]

Let me ask the guys who visited girls in Russia, whether you expected any gifts  from girls and whether they  give you any. What  if they didnt? Would that  change your  opinion about the girl to the worse?

[lovelyannie]

Box of chocolate is always a winner... Bring a book about the place where you live too and flowers. If everything goes well, you will be a gift for her..if not ... you will be glad to have not bought something too expensive.

You sound like a very  cheap guy. A box of chocolates is nice of course, but if someone gives me just  a box of chocolates and a book, i would consider him being not serious and he would not have any chance  with me.
An appropriate gift  for the fist meeting could be some jewelry, even not exspensive, may be simulant - to match girl's eyes  with a nice compliment to add. A gift should express  your affection and adoration, it should show you think of her and look for a chance to give her pleasure. A box of chocolates  and a book are too formal girfts for the first  meeting as they are totally meaningless.

[groovlstk]

Let me ask the guys who visited girls in Russia, whether you expected any gifts  from girls and whether they  give you any. What  if they didnt? Would that  change your  opinion about the girl to the worse?

I always bought small gifts w/me, books w/photos of NYC, prints of old photos of monuments, etc. I disagree that books are not so relevant now that anyone can find the same photos online - give someone you admire a book and she can read it in bed before falling asleep, take it on the metro on her way to work, all the while thinking of you and what your life must be like.

FWIW, on my first visit with the woman I married, I bought several such gifts but my wife gave me many more. Most I keep on display in my office at work since they are now symbols of our first meeting. Except for the manpurse - I wore that once in Moscow out of obligation and once was enough. 

[Faux Pas]

Let me ask the guys who visited girls in Russia, whether you expected any gifts  from girls and whether they  give you any. What  if they didnt? Would that  change your  opinion about the girl to the worse?

I never expected any gifts nor did I expect them in later subsequent trips but I always do receive gifts. If she didn't give a gift it wouldn't matter. Gifts are for giving and one should never expect a gift.  

You sound like a very  cheap guy. A box of chocolates is nice of course, but if someone gives me just  a box of chocolates and a book, i would consider him being not serious and he would not have any chance  with me.
An appropriate gift  for the fist meeting could be some jewelry, even not exspensive, may be simulant - to match girl's eyes  with a nice compliment to add. A gift should express  your affection and adoration, it should show you think of her and look for a chance to give her pleasure. A box of chocolates  and a book are too formal girfts for the first  meeting as they are totally meaningless.

I agree. Regardless of what one gives or how many gifts they give, if it is a romantic visit one should present a "personal" gift. This is IMO but I usually take many gifts, some food, some drink, other trinkets I find that may interest her and always a nice piece of jewelry. Sometimes expensive, sometimes not.

[Whynot]

Let me ask the guys who visited girls in Russia, whether you expected any gifts  from girls and whether they  give you any. What  if they didnt? Would that  change your  opinion about the girl to the worse?

I certainly expected nothing but was surprised to receive a small gift.  It didn't change my opinion of the woman at all - i'd already decided that i liked her - but i did appreciate the gesture. 

 

You sound like a very  cheap guy. A box of chocolates is nice of course, but if someone gives me just  a box of chocolates and a book, i would consider him being not serious and he would not have any chance  with me.  An appropriate gift  for the fist meeting could be some jewelry, even not exspensive, may be simulant - to match girl's eyes  with a nice compliment to add. A gift should express  your affection and adoration, it should show you think of her and look for a chance to give her pleasure. A box of chocolates  and a book are too formal girfts for the first  meeting as they are totally meaningless.

Interesting view.  IMHO women who expect jewelry from a guy they haven't met previously would put some guys off.  For me personally, i wouldn't want to know her. Totally different matter after there's a mutual connection and both decide that they want to take things further.  I guess though that there may be very different expectations between FSUW and western women.  If you rocked up to a first date (after meeting someone through the net and swapping a number of emails) and gave a western woman a small item of jewelry most would think you a bit 'creepy'. 

[I/O]

A gift should express  your affection and adoration

After 7 emails and maybe 3 phone calls? 

BTW gifts never formed any significant part of our relationship early on.

I/O

[lovelyannie]

After 7 emails and maybe 3 phone calls? 

BTW gifts never formed any significant part of our relationship early on.

I/O

Who ever spends thousands of dollars for a visit with a girl who he hardly knows??? Use video calls in the net to get to know  the person properly/ My faince and me had been dating in SKype for half a year  before we met in person and it seemed to both of us during the first meeting that  we were just  spouses who met  after being far apart for long.There is no sense to visit  anyone after a couple emails or phone calls. It woudl be silly.

[Ooooops]

What is a "personal" gift?   From the last posts I've understood that it's something you don't eat.       

[lovelyannie]

Interesting view.  IMHO women who expect jewelry from a guy they haven't met previously would put some guys off.  For me personally, i wouldn't want to know her. Totally different matter after there's a mutual connection and both decide that they want to take things further.  I guess though that there may be very different expectations between FSUW and western women.  If you rocked up to a first date (after meeting someone through the net and swapping a number of emails) and gave a western woman a small item of jewelry most would think you a bit 'creepy'. 

Did  you see that  i actuyally  said - CHEEP JEWELRY? A book and a box of chocolates is a gift which can be given to anyone  - eitgher  to your Grandma, or to your lady boss/ The gift for romance meeting must be romantic.

[I/O]

Who ever spends thousands of dollars for a visit with a girl who he hardly knows???

The vast majority.

I/O

[Zmejka]

A box of chocolates is nice of course, but if someone gives me just  a box of chocolates and a book, i would consider him being not serious and he would not have any chance  with me

So would you reject your fiance if he brought you a box of chocolate and a book for your first meeting - not giving him a "second chance" and putting his gifts before him as a person? or did you tell him in advance what do you expect him to bring?
And would you reject him if he wouldn't have congratulated you with the Woman's Day (for example) because he never heard of it?