Ways my wife can meet new friends (especially RW) after arrival in America

[Ooooops]

I'm really impressed that you, guys, invest so much time and thoughts into introducing your new wife into new life.   I had to live with scenario "throw it off the boat and see if it can swim"       But I think it was the right thing to do, anyway...    If a woman can survive on her own in Russian - life in USA will be a smooth sailing for her...   

[ECOCKS]

We may be in the minority, but we never found Russian friends to be particularly helpful or desirable, as a rule.

As Viktoriya put it to me once: "Why would I hang around a bunch of women that I wouldn't be friends with in Ukraine just because they speak the same language I do?"

Most of the Russian/Ukrainian women we knew who would hang around together and go places all the time together did so because they had bad marriages and didn't want to be around their husband. Not all. But most.

There were a couple Russian women that Viktoriya actually liked, but most of them were just unhappy women who used to hang around and bad-mouth America and Americans. If the men could actually know what their wives say about them (in Russian) their hair would stand on end.

If you really want to find ways of hooking your wife up with those kinds of women... good luck...

YMMV...

My wife asked me to tell you that she likes your wife's sentiment on this issue.

[Aloe]

sometimes i wish my fiance (husband in 2 days ) would understand that i'm leaving my home country to be with him in a place i'd never consider as a place to live otherwise, and that it is a sacrifice on my part, cuz he treats it like its nothing unusual   i read europeans aren't very patriotic, maybe that's why.

[Shadow]

sometimes i wish my fiance (husband in 2 days ) would understand that i'm leaving my home country to be with him in a place i'd never consider as a place to live otherwise, and that it is a sacrifice on my part, cuz he treats it like its nothing unusual   i read europeans aren't very patriotic, maybe that's why.

It depends on the country. If you will take people from the larger countries like France, Germany and Spain, you will find a lot of patriottism. Those from the smaller countries have been brought up more international, as a small country can not survive without international trade. Remember that in many ways Belgium is about as big as Moscow, which means that leaving a home country would be as big an issue as moving from Moscow to St Petersburg...

[GQBlues]

I had to live with scenario "throw it off the boat and see if it can swim"       But I think it was the right thing to do, anyway...    If a woman can survive on her own in Russian - life in USA will be a smooth sailing for her...   

That's how it generally is for the majority of immigrants who arrived without the benefit of receiving relatives. I agree with you. In more ways than one there's advantages in acquiring general awareness when an immigrant embark on his/her acclimation solely relying only upon their own self and faculties. Sort of like the metaphor you used above.

When I looked at how I adjusted to this society and its system, and looked at how my wife went through with hers, the difference is remarkable. Despite the nagging homesickness most go through, all, including my wife, really doesn't fully realize how relatively 'easy' it is for them/her nowadays. Anytime my wife felt how hard things seem to be for her the first 2 years, she basically used her knowledge on my adjustment time to help re-load her perspective. It helps steer her state of mind a little better.

Domestic support (financial, social, mental, etc) and guidance are a 'given' for most of them. Emails, webcams, language softwares, networking, and general globalization effects these days were nowhere near available not too long ago. Lastly, the likelihood of being able to return within a year, sometimes multiple trips back or lenghty stays, etc...are another sets of realities not afforded too many immigrating persons.

Just putting things in perspectives.

[Blues Fairy]

sometimes i wish my fiance (husband in 2 days ) would understand that i'm leaving my home country to be with him in a place i'd never consider as a place to live otherwise, and that it is a sacrifice on my part, cuz he treats it like its nothing unusual   i read europeans aren't very patriotic, maybe that's why.

While your frustration is understandable, you would be wise to never remind him what a great sacrifice you're making to be with him.  When hammered down one's throat, it can only cause resentment.  Besides, relocating is really no big deal in the great scheme of things.

[GoodOlBoy]

.....i'm leaving my home country to be with him in a place i'd never consider as a place to live otherwise,......

While your frustration is understandable, you would be wise to never remind him what a great sacrifice you're making to be with him. 

BF is correct Aloe.

Never tell your husband about this.

It will cause a major resentment/guilt factor in your relationship with him.

Every married man on this forum (RWD) is well aware and appreciative of the sacrifices our RW's have made to be here with us.


GOB

[Misha]

While your frustration is understandable, you would be wise to never remind him what a great sacrifice you're making to be with him.  When hammered down one's throat, it can only cause resentment.  Besides, relocating is really no big deal in the great scheme of things.

Yes, because at some point he will remind you that you had the choice to say no and that nobody forced you to leave your country or marry your husband.

[Ooooops]

Just putting things in perspectives.

Yep...