the "P" word....

[SANDRO43]

IIRC, we've discussed good manners before.

Some view them as empty formalities, others as signs of good upbringing. Apart from other considerations, I think their delivery is important to judge motive. A "thank you" in an ice-cold voice may be worst than any lack of acknowledgement, in a vacuous voice it may sound totally empty and insincere.

Similarly with smiles, if only the mouth moves in a 'conditioned-reflex' action and eyes are not involved as well.

To me, sincere good manners mean awareness and consideration of others. Rude people are almost always selfish people who only care about themselves, the others be damned .

[RussianWind]

are you implying i use my husband to perform dogs functions i bring him socks too

Brilliant answer Aloe, let me shake your paw 

[AramisLux]

thanks everyone for all of the input. it is greatly appreciated.

Aloe and RussianWind:

i really liked your suggestions, but it would be most helpful if you would show me how i should pronounce your suggestions. please do what Vaughn did in reply number 2 (if you can). thanks to Vaughn, i feel like i can say "excuse me, please" in russian and get reasonably close to how it should sound in russian.

and i think i can pronounce "говорить по-русски" and "ya goveryou poruski" without any additional guidance. all of the other words you suggest are a little new to me.

this thread is showing me that i need to make more progress with my own russian studies, and that i probably should get a better russian-english dictionary - one with english pronounciation.

oh, and to answer one other question for me that is in this thread: yeah, i would love to date this girl, but i don't want to use any approach with her that sounds like i am just trying to "hit on her". i have seen lots of other guys do that (in english) and they obviously got nowhere with her.

for the present time, i would just like to have regular conversations with her and see what happens.

[Shadow]

this thread is showing me that i need to make more progress with my own russian studies, and that i probably should get a better russian-english dictionary - one with english pronounciation.

Instead of trying to get the pronounciation from a dictionary, with all funny results it might give, better study the pronounciation rules of Russian-written words.
Russian is a highly phonetic language and once you learn the Cyrillic alphabet and pronounciation it becomes easy to read. Not easier to understand, but easy to read. 

[AramisLux]

Shadow:

it is a little ironic that you posted that. i had decided that i need to study the pronounciation rules much more than i have; so you and i seem to think very much the same way.

i feel like i can read russian pretty well now; but speaking russian face to face with a native russian speaker (if that is what she truly is) has me feeling a bit 'insecure' which is something i am not used to.

one thing that i hope in: that she will find me funny and want me to speak more russian 'for her amusement'.

[dgellis]

In my two trips to Russia I said please and thank you, in Russian, when I normally would in English.

I found that Russian people were very polite, and helpful.  Often I would say something in Russian, they would very politely correct me, and be grateful to me for trying to speak their language.

"When running with wolves, howl like a wolf."

-D

[RussianWind]

one thing that i hope in: that she will find me funny and want me to speak more russian 'for her amusement'.

Yes, just go for it, don't be afraid. Whatever you say it will be ok. Keep my fingers croessed 

[SANDRO43]

Ii had decided that i need to study the pronounciation rules much more than i have

Have a look at the links on PRONUNCIATION OF RUSSIAN WORDS at the bottom of this page of our RWDpedia: http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/mwiki/index.php?title=Learn_Russian .

[AramisLux]

thanks SANDRO43

lots of really helpful resources!!

[SANDRO43]

lots of really helpful resources!!

Yes, rather odd that few bother to consult it . Incidentally, it's open to any member's contribution .

[RussianWind]

Yes, rather odd that few bother to consult it .

Hey Mr Treccani I know you will do it better 

But seriously I didn't understand the question. Must be blond today 

[SANDRO43]

But seriously I didn't understand the question.

Neither do I , did I pose one here ?

[OlgaH]

In approaching a FSUW in the USA, using 'poe ja loos sta', assuming you are
pronouncing it correctly, is fine - but if your Russian is limited, why not just approach
her in your native English with which you are more comfortable?

If you insist on trying Russian, stick with извините, пожалуйста (excuse me, please)
and continue from there.... roughly pronounced eez-vee-NEE-tyeh   pah-ZHAL-sta with the
stress on Capitalized syllables. Good luck dude.

In Russia when we address our requests or question we also use "Будьте добры" (bood'-tye dobry) or "Будьте любезны" (bood'-tye  lyu-bye-zny) as equivalents to пожалуйста (please)

I think English equivalent to Russian "Будьте добры" and  "Будьте любезны" is  "would you be so kind to..."

[OlgaH]

To me, sincere good manners mean awareness and consideration of others. Rude people are almost always selfish people who only care about themselves, the others be damned .

Agree.

[AramisLux]

THANK YOU OlgaH!!!!!!

this is exactly what i am looking for: a good way to say "would you please be so kind as to...."

you are soooooo helpful.

[Vaughn]

I thank you too, Olga. It's always a challenge finding contemporary phrases as used
in social situations. 

[OlgaH]

THANK YOU OlgaH!!!!!!

I thank you too, Olga.

пожалуйста, AramisLux and Vaughn.

 In Russia the word пожалуйста (pah-zhah-loosta) is also a polite  response to "thank you" (Russian спасибо spah-see-bah) as English "you are welcome)