Moscow trip report, I have returned.

[Sculpto]

brave girl..

as you may have noticed i haven't been posting at all about my relationship.  Things got very strange and there was a lot of drama related to the death of her father last march.  Some of the drama she created was 100% fiction designed to test me, some of it was her being emotionally distressed.  At the end of a lot of effort we have worked through the problems, she has opened herself up and has been a real sweetheart since.

[facetrock]

   Your fiancee created a bunch of drama to test you?  That seems a little strange Fiction. I thought RWs tested you at the shopping mall.

[Sculpto]

Facet.. it was strange.  But, given the circumstances of her Fathers death, and the fact that she was never looking for a foreign man and has a lot of reasons NOT to leave Russia, she wanted to be sure that I wasn't playing her.  Honestly it sucked and I was on the verge of quitting with her many times, but, we have always seemed to find a way through problems. 

[KenC]

Facet.. it was strange.  But, given the circumstances of her Fathers death, and the fact that she was never looking for a foreign man and has a lot of reasons NOT to leave Russia, she wanted to be sure that I wasn't playing her.  Honestly it sucked and I was on the verge of quitting with her many times, but, we have always seemed to find a way through problems. 

Yeah, like you making more excuses for her bad behavior.
 
KenC

[Sculpto]

Yeah, like you making more excuses for her bad behavior.
 
KenC

Yeah but at least she cooks, cleans and sleeps in the same bed with me. 

[BillyB]

 Visa interview next Thursday.  Barring any unforseens she will be here in 4-5 weeks.

Whoa!!!! You were educating Judnnc about risks and you are marrying that woman you wrote about in a trip report 2 1/2 months ago?


Don't you remember you said she was "corrupt, a hypocrite, a life with her will be a life that proceeds from one crisis/conflict to the next, and, no matter what the reality, it will always be my fault and she admitted to me that she had been hospitalized for a psychological disorder, one that would automatically make her ineligible for the fiance visa.  Its another lie that she told me months ago.", "The other hypocrisy relative to her earning money would also make her ineligible.","questions of character and morality, (seems strange coming from me but its serious) a warped self esteem that is beyond arrogance or stubborn.. I don't think there is a word.. oh wait, there is, the one she used to describe herself.. Tyrant, like Stalin... an absolute ability to not compromise and go forward with bad decisions made in the heat of an emotional moment and finally the worst of all is an irrational and emotional insistence on reading between the lines and finding hidden meanings, usually highly inaccurate, that have ultimately proven to be the greatest source of conflict during the entire relationship.", "she was trying to train me, and to test me, AGAIN."." She is carrying a lot of crap around that she had hidden quite well over the last two years. "

There are other things about her you said you didn't want to speak about. Somehow, so far, I feel you've been kind in your assessment of her.

I don't think in the history of this or any RW forum a poster has spoken so poorly of a woman and the woman's character that he's visited and proceeded with marriage.

You said her job and her psychological problems will not make her eligible for a visa so do you recommend her lying to the interviewer?

Judnnc may have seem to be rushing his marriage but at least he doesn't have negative things to say about the lady he's visiting.

Mr. Fiction, if this is the best you can do, I'm practically speechless. I'd rather be a single man that marry Hell. All I can say is that I'm not going to be happy if this blows up in your face only to have a crazed and corrupt person milking the social programs we have in this country. I'm not trying to insult your fiancee but just basing my thoughts off your words and feelings about her.

No matter if she recently turned into a sweetheart, she is what she is. I also think the power of the bush has control over you and your eagerness to marry has desperation written all over it. I feel better all those bad things you've said about me aren't as bad as what you would say about your own fiancee.

[KenC]

Yeah but at least she cooks, cleans and sleeps in the same bed with me. 

You're a long long way from throwing such stones.  She has yet to marry you, yet to even pass her interview which even YOU doubt she will pass.  Keep dreaming of "how it's gonna be!"  We will believe it, when and if it happens.
KenC

[GregfromGa]

You're a long long way from throwing such stones.  She has yet to marry you, yet to even pass her interview which even YOU doubt she will pass.  Keep dreaming of "how it's gonna be!"  We will believe it, when and if it happens.
KenC

She aint coming here. Poor bastard has ZERO chance.

[Sculpto]

LOL.

This is why you guys give bad advice.  You don't know the scenario, make massive assumptions, and think you know everything.  I am not talking about me specifically, I am talking about 99% of the garbage you spew. 

So.. move on to the next subject.  I will not respond further to this one. 

[KenC]

Typical blowhard actions by Sculpto 20012.  Run his mouth and then run away.  (Hope you don't have to change your name here again out of embarrassment 2012.)
KenC

[LEGAL]

________________

[Sculpto]

Hey Ken.. sorry to say it bud but you don't give advice.  You clue bat everyone when YOU are the one that needs the clue bat.  Get a grip on reality dude.

[brave girl]

brave girl..

as you may have noticed i haven't been posting at all about my relationship.  Things got very strange and there was a lot of drama related to the death of her father last march.  Some of the drama she created was 100% fiction designed to test me, some of it was her being emotionally distressed.  At the end of a lot of effort we have worked through the problems, she has opened herself up and has been a real sweetheart since.

Yes, yes... and does Siberia understand about this "dating" behavior with other woman from your sphere?? (while you patiently wait for Siberia arrival!!)   brave girl

met an RW this weekend..

When we left the film....When we got to the car she actually leaned in for a kiss and I pulled back and said "see ya" and turned my back with her lips still puckered up.  I hope she thinks a lot about why I haven't and will not call her again, but, I doubt she will. 

May be "free love"?? :evil:  brave girl

[JR]

Yes, yes... and does Siberia understand about this "dating" behavior with other woman from your sphere?? (while you patiently wait for Siberia arrival!!)   brave girl


May be "free love"?? :evil:  brave girl

Tsk Tsk Tsk Brave Girl, you are behind the times. He also has a "Back Up" girl in Mexico he goes to visit for more than a kiss )))

[Wienerin]

Dan,
I don't want to put words in 2012's mouth, but I think he means more along the lines of; the law is either outdated or due to changes in society we could benefit from a new mechanism which would allow for this new development concerning foreign spouses. It is what the meaning of my post was as well. Times change, rules and laws change when there is sufficient logic/support for it.
It seems that by the use of a procedure, which wasn't meant to be used in the manner it is being used, due to changes in society, it would be logical to think it might be a good idea to facilitate these changes.

I don't mean to offend you if you are a politician, with my "DC boys" comment.

That's what I don't understand about this whole issue - what's "unfair", "poorly written", etc. And now even talking about "spouses" - which spouses? Taken within the context of the immigration law there's  nothing THAT special about K-1. Who said that the only way for your fiance/e to see your family, etc. is to "lie" at the interview for K-1 and then use the 90 days for unintended purpose?

Why she/he cannot get a B visa? Oh, US Consulate isn't that eager to give tourist visas to Russians etc.? Tough titty guys, - but nothing to do with "unfairness" of K1. Dame old, same old... A country is entitled to protect it's borders, and choose whom it wants to let in. There's no entitlement for an alien to come in whenever or why he/she chooses. And many Russians, Ukrainians, etc. DO come on tourist visas, - there are published  USCIS statistics, open for everyone.

And I know for sure that many future K1 beneficiaries did make a trip or two beforehand - on tourist, work-and-travel, business, etc. temp visas. Also I know for sure that many came on a temp. visa - and got married (as they intended all along) "to avoid the hassle" with K1. Go figure why the consuls are reluctant to allow single women come visiting single men - not to mention how many FSU people come on
temp. visas and simply never (or for many years) return to their countries... same applies to Chinese, Indians, Philippinos, people of other countries - Asian and African.

I greatly deplore the trait ofmy many former compatriots to seek offence and "unfair" treatment as directed specifically at "Russians"... nohow-noway

[Kunstkammer]

So has homeboy gotten married yet or what? It is almost July..

[Gylden]

That's what I don't understand about this whole issue - what's "unfair", "poorly written", etc. And now even talking about "spouses" - which spouses? Taken within the context of the immigration law there's  nothing THAT special about K-1. Who said that the only way for your fiance/e to see your family, etc. is to "lie" at the interview for K-1 and then use the 90 days for unintended purpose?

Why she/he cannot get a B visa? Oh, US Consulate isn't that eager to give tourist visas to Russians etc.? Tough titty guys, - but nothing to do with "unfairness" of K1. Dame old, same old... A country is entitled to protect it's borders, and choose whom it wants to let in. There's no entitlement for an alien to come in whenever or why he/she chooses. And many Russians, Ukrainians, etc. DO come on tourist visas, - there are published  USCIS statistics, open for everyone.

And I know for sure that many future K1 beneficiaries did make a trip or two beforehand - on tourist, work-and-travel, business, etc. temp visas. Also I know for sure that many came on a temp. visa - and got married (as they intended all along) "to avoid the hassle" with K1. Go figure why the consuls are reluctant to allow single women come visiting single men - not to mention how many FSU people come on
temp. visas and simply never (or for many years) return to their countries... same applies to Chinese, Indians, Philippinos, people of other countries - Asian and African.

I greatly deplore the trait ofmy many former compatriots to seek offence and "unfair" treatment as directed specifically at "Russians"... nohow-noway

Weinerin,
Well before you get yourself all worked up about some missunderstanding, you might want to research the history of the K-1 visa process.
Also you might want to familiarise yourself with some of my other posts regarding visa's, immigration politics, etc.
The US, by the way is not against immigration or that a man or woman finds a foreign spouse. Immigration is open to those who seek it.
 

[Daveman]

Weinerin,
Well before you get yourself all worked up about some missunderstanding, you might want to research the history of the K-1 visa process.
Also you might want to familiarise yourself with some of my other posts regarding visa's, immigration politics, etc.
The US, by the way is not against immigration or that a man or woman finds a foreign spouse. Immigration is open to those who seek it.
 

Just went through and read this thread today.  Wow, definitely a speedy one for the OP.  Makes one wonder what the update would actually be at this point.

Anyway, I agree with you Gylden about the 'benefit' that a different K process for a fiancée to be able to travel here for the sole purpose of spending time, meeting family and friends, seeing her environment, etc.  I'm sure it would give a more rational thought process on marriage knowing what she/he will be moving into as well as having the time to carefully consider.  And of course there would be those who would abuse that - find a sponsor and disappear, but it does make a lot of sense. 

The current system isn't an 'injustice' but certainly could be made more pragmatic to the goal.  I kinda like the idea of a 1 year multiple entry visa for a legitimate fiancée (scrutinized the same way as the K-1 for a valid relationship, et al), with the option to marry the guy during the stay and be adjusted to permanent, or go back home after the end of the term and later file for the K-1.  Not sure how it would effect the overall divorce rate, but should at least eliminate the ones involving environment shock factor and some of the ones with an incompatibility factor (unless of course we factor in the statistic of divorce percentages of those "living together" prior to marriage being higher.. hmmm).  Seems a good idea to me.

[Gylden]

Daveman,
Yeah, you know the K-1 is just an outdated tool, needs to be updated IMO. Plenty of good ideas out there. Procedures will be abused/bent no matter what (just ask any good accountant/lawyer).

But why not implement regulations which apply to more modern times?

 

[Daveman]

Daveman,
Yeah, you know the K-1 is just an outdated tool, needs to be updated IMO. Plenty of good ideas out there. Procedures will be abused/bent no matter what (just ask any good accountant/lawyer).

But why not implement regulations which apply to more modern times?

 

Yep, I guess the problem lies in that gov't isn't all that worried about the main benefit of increasing the likelihood of better informed decisions, because even if there's a divorce in whatever time period, the immigration was/is legal and their onus abated so to speak.  So they're just trying to curtail illegal immigration rather than give people the proper avenues to know each other and environment more thoroughly.  It would certainly be logical to combine the two concepts, but I guess having "logical" and "government" in the same sentence rarely flies.

[Faux Pas]

judnc has sent me a few updates I assume to prove me wrong. I really hope he does. According to judnnc his K-1 is progressing nicely and apparently his lady had a scheduled interview in Moscow from the last I heard from him. Thats been a month or so ago. I haven't heard anything since.