ML and Ukrainian Women.

[OlgaH]

She is free to do that anytime she wants . . . in her own apartment or house.

The words above would be a big red flag for me. And it is not just about bread. Some women don't pay attention to such statements or they think they are smarter than a man and after you can see them on RW forums... with their sad stories...

[OlgaH]

"my house my rules".  The basis of a relationship based on mutual respect and love . . .

+1 

[ECOCKS]

"my house my rules".  The basis of a relationship based on mutual respect and love . . .

Well, clearly the woman knows his rule and has agreed to it. If he truly has her "forced" to live a breadless lifestyle against her wishes that would be another thing.

My advice to guys marrying an FSUW, "Buy her a loaf of artisan pumpernickel." Try several types/brands and let her pick which one she likes best.

[Ade]

The words above would be a big red flag for me. And it is not just about bread. Some women don't pay attention to such statements or they think they are smarter than a man and after you can see them on RW forums... with their sad stories...

There are as many (if not more) self deluded FSUW in this game as Western men. We know several that chose to ignore "quirky personality traits" or thought they could change their man after they were married. Of course, they are not happy now and one is actively seeking avenues of escape from her husband and screwing around in the process. I don't particularly agree with her methods and I think she, as an adult is responsible for the decisions she made in the absolutely blinding light of day (if you ask me), however, it still should be a wake up call to the dudes in this game that marrying a woman is one thing, having a long lasting happy marriage is quite another.

[BillyB]

Gentleman, it's okay to tell a woman "no". A big problem with guys are that they always say "yes".
Last page I read Manlooking said he's getting in better shape. Did anybody else read that or just the part where he's reducing the food intake of his gal? Whatever deal they have going between them is between them.
The gal may have encountered one too many men who always said "yes" to everything she wants. I dated RW who dumped men like that. Usually those kind of men were young. They felt those men can't think for themselves and make decisions since the answer is always the same. Gal didn't dump Manlooking over the lack of bread. Maybe she's happy she finally found a man who isn't going to kiss her azz all the time.

[Ade]

Gentleman, it's okay to tell a woman "no". A big problem with guys are that they always say "yes".
Last page I read Manlooking said he's getting in better shape. Did anybody else read that or just the part where he's reducing the food intake of his gal? Whatever deal they have going between them is between them.
The gal may have encountered one too many men who always said "yes" to everything she wants. I dated RW who dumped men like that. Usually those kind of men were young. They felt those men can't think for themselves and make decisions since the answer is always the same. Gal didn't dump Manlooking over the lack of bread. Maybe she's happy she finally found a man who isn't going to kiss her azz all the time.

Billy, you are as simplistic as an on/off switch; it's one extreme or the other for you. Life is far more complex for the rest of normal humanity. 

[BillyB]

Billy, you are as simplistic as an on/off switch; it's one extreme or the other for you. Life is far more complex for the rest of normal humanity. 

 Ever notice when someone disagrees with you that they are ignorant or an idiot?
 
Saying "yes" all the time is extreme and I suspect you are one of those predictable type of guys. Wife wants something and she already knows your answer. Predictable.
 
I'd like to eat chocolate and bacon everyday but if I want to attract women, I need to make some adjustments and control my wants. I do it for the ladies, not myself. If nobody cared, most people would let go of their bodies, hygiene, attitudes, etc... Manlooking cares about his gal's looks so she may get the point of keeping in shape if she cares about pleasing him. As long as he is looking good for her in return, I don't see a problem.

[Ade]

 Ever notice when someone disagrees with you that they are ignorant or an idiot?
 
Saying "yes" all the time is extreme and I suspect you are one of those predictable type of guys. Wife wants something and she already knows your answer. Predictable.
 
I'd like to eat chocolate and bacon everyday but if I want to attract women, I need to make some adjustments and control my wants. I do it for the ladies, not myself. If nobody cared, most people would let go of their bodies, hygiene, attitudes, etc... Manlooking cares about his gal's looks so she may get the point of keeping in shape if she cares about pleasing him. As long as he is looking good for her in return, I don't see a problem.

Yet again you prove my point. 

[GoodOlBoy]

I seek to control no one.  No one is ever forced to visit my home, eat a non-bread meal in my home,  or live in my home.

If anyone seeks bread rather than my company, the door is open.

Yep, that sentence just about says it all. 
 
GOB

[GoodOlBoy]

Well, clearly the woman knows his rule and has agreed to it.

This is true, for now....... But after some time here (in the GoodOl' USA), she will come to the realization that she married a selfish "control freak".

How you ask?
 
Her neighbors and friends ( if she is "allowed" to have any  ) will show her the real skinny on how marriages are supposed to be (mutual respect between 2 human beings) and then:
 

....they think they are smarter than a man and after you can see them on RW forums... with their sad stories...

 
GOB
 
 
 

[Boethius]

ML and the lady living with him are not married.  He did not do a K-1 for her either.  I believe she entered the U.S. as a student, though I may be wrong on that.

[GoodOlBoy]

ML and the lady living with him are not married.  He did not do a K-1 for her either.  I believe she entered the U.S. as a student, though I may be wrong on that.

Oh.... my bad  .
In that case it makes his behavior twice as bad.
This is certainly NO WAY to treat a guest in your household.
 
GOB

[JR]

Bread is arguably the worst thing for you to eat, JR. Unless you're Jewish, then it's OK. You can then break a loaf or two everyday if you want. But then if you're Jewish, you can't go to the gym. Jewish folks don't work-out as you'll never see one near a gym...
 
There's a guy who opened up a plush gym in Beverly Hills couple of years ago or so. It went broke after 8 months. No one showed up, LOL.

I go to the gym regularly, one near BH, there are a lot Jews there. Some are in amazingly good shape.
But my point was, stop trying to control her, it's up to her. If she wants bread encourage her to exercise, buy "good" bread, there is such a thing. Getting into arguements over two slices of bread will lead to a lot more than a few lbs either way.

[Muzh]

Oh.... my bad  .
In that case it makes his behavior twice as bad.
This is certainly NO WAY to treat a guest in your household.
 
GOB

+10

[ECOCKS]

ML and the lady living with him are not married.  He did not do a K-1 for her either.  I believe she entered the U.S. as a student, though I may be wrong on that.

Sorry, but I'm not buying this as particularly "controlling".

I don't allow other dogs, cats or cigarettes in "my house" either. That's MY HOUSE as in the place I live which isn't the same as implying he's running Auschwitz.

Maybe he IS an over-controlling freak but so far I haven't seen a long enough list that would make me think that. I don't read all he writes though, are there any other additions to the list of demands, decrees and arbitrary rules in HIS HOUSE that I have missed. How long is the list?

Wait, OMG, my wife doesn't allow shoes in our house AND she's saying that we CANNOT replace the dog when she passes away, should I start watching her for other evidence of over-control?

Come on guys, I'm not ML's buddy or anything but aren't you reaching a bit on this?

[Faux Pas]

Billy, you are as simplistic as an on/off switch; it's one extreme or the other for you. Life is far more complex for the rest of normal humanity. 

Attempting to explain controlling behavior to Billy would be akin to teaching a pig to sing. It's impossible to do and it only annoys the pig

[Muzh]

Come on guys, I'm not ML's buddy or anything but aren't you reaching a bit on this?

Nope.
 
It is just bread, not dogs, not cats and not cigarrettes. I'm surprised that for someone who complains too much about someone else dictating your life, suddenly this is a non-issue.

[Jack]

Nope.
 
It is just bread, not dogs, not cats and not cigarrettes. I'm surprised that for someone who complains too much about someone else dictating your life, suddenly this is a non-issue.

+1

[ECOCKS]

Nope.
 
It is just bread, not dogs, not cats and not cigarrettes. I'm surprised that for someone who complains too much about someone else dictating your life, suddenly this is a non-issue.

And I'm not really surprised at a comment like that coming from the sort of person who is determined to tell everyone how they have to live their life.


Guess you're going to have to submit your prohibited list for analysis ML.

After careful consideration the jury will come back and let you know whether the list is too long and arbitrary enough to make you officially "controlling".

After that you'll probably need to bring them to a public location to make her declaration that she has a full understanding of your limitations and is a willing participant. She'll be examined for chain marks and assured she can go into protective custody if necessary.

So much for innocent until proven guilty, the witch hunt is in full swing and the peasants will be there with pitchforks, tar and feathers.

[Boethius]

Sorry, Ed, it is selfish and controlling. 


A cat or dog is a big responsibility, plus come with potential allergies.  They, and cigarettes, affect everyone in the house.


ML has stated he is not giving the woman bread, notwithstanding the fact she has asked for bread, because he doesn't want her to gain weight.  Heck, why not have a scale in the kitchen?  He can weigh her, and if she has gained 20g, no food for her! 


Wouldn't you be humiliated, as an adult, if you wanted a chocolate and your wife forbadeyou from eating a chocolate because it "goes straight to your waistline"?  Don't you think that would also demonstrate your wife had zero respect for you?


I agree with GOB, this is not how one treats a guest, particularly a guest one presumably has affection for and is sleeping with.

[BillyB]

Wouldn't you be humiliated, as an adult, if you wanted a chocolate and your wife forbade you from eating a chocolate because it "goes straight to your waistline"?  Don't you think that would also demonstrate your wife had zero respect for you?

My fiancee is going to buy our food. I already know she's going to buy much healthier than I have done. I don't think it's about control, she's going to do it because she love and cares about me. She also told me she can't do much with a fat man.
 

this is not how one treats a guest, particularly a guest one presumably has affection for and is sleeping with.

I haven't read all this thread but if the lady is just a guest, Manlooking should buy her some bread but I suspect they are more than just friends so before marriage people got to feel each other out. Only the woman understands Manlooking and how he's taking care of her. Is she or is she not satisfied? If she is currently sleeping with him, then many of you are bothered by the bread situation than she.

[GQBlues]

 
I go to the gym regularly, one near BH, there are a lot Jews there. Some are in amazingly good shape.

I was being facetious, JR. You know...Last supper, breaking bread, Jews, not good for your health...
 
As for gyms, the majority of these facilities are owned and ran by Jewish old monies...just like everything else in Hollywood. Just ask Mel    Matter of fact, join a 1-year membership in any of these gyms, they'll give you a choice of discounted coupons from either Canter's, Langer's or Brent's....the best kosher delis in town. Notwitstanding Jerry's....
 

But my point was, stop trying to control her, it's up to her. If she wants bread encourage her to exercise, buy "good" bread, there is such a thing. Getting into arguements over two slices of bread will lead to a lot more than a few lbs either way.

True. But I'd rather give the lady credit that if she isn't accomodating to ML's standard, nothing really should be stopping her. The fact she hasn't, suggests to me they're the  ol  birds of feathers...

[OlgaH]

One of the distinctive features of people with controlling behavior is they deny authenticity of other people. They try to impose their standards on a partner and mold the partner into their ideal image. When they say they love in reality they love not a real person but a perfect image in their own mind. They usually don't give a choice, or if they give a choice it is equal to "do what I say or you are free to leave and do what you want but without me... not in my place" and so on.

A perfect partner for the controllers would be a person with a lack of self-control, for example if a person can not control their eating habits a partner-controller can do it perfectly for them, a person with a lack of self-confidence and a lack of self-esteem, when he/she needs to seek an approval, for example comparing, her/himself with other people and feeling better if there is someone who looks worse ...

A controlling behavior also may display itself in a negative comments with direct and indirect insults,  for example in such comments as "only idiots can do such thing... or can say such thing". When one of my girlfriend shared with me a correspondence with an AM there was a line in his letter that gave us a red flag, instead of saying "I'm sorry I think you misunderstood..." or something like that  he just put her down with his remark on her English, maybe he did it unintentionally,  but devil is in the details... that are often overlooked

Actually,  to each his own and for every controller there is a person who would like to be controlled.




   
 

[Boethius]

My fiancee is going to buy our food. I already know she's going to buy much healthier than I have done. I don't think it's about control, she's going to do it because she love and cares about me. She also told me she can't do much with a fat man.

Most Ukrainians eat bread daily.  Have a look on the streets of any Ukrainian city for the evidence of bread consumption on body weights.
 

I haven't read all this thread but if the lady is just a guest, Manlooking should buy her some bread but I suspect they are more than just friends so before marriage people got to feel each other out. Only the woman understands Manlooking and how he's taking care of her. Is she or is she not satisfied? If she is currently sleeping with him, then many of you are bothered by the bread situation than she.

If she had her own income (enough to live on in the U.S.) and a green card, you'd have a point.  She is dependent on him and has asked him to buy her bread. 

[Misha]

She is dependent on him and has asked him to buy her bread.

IIRC, she had enough money to buy a new car once she arrived. I doubt she is dependent on him to buy bread if this is the case.