Hello from New England

[GQBlues]

Sure, but somehow many American families manage to buy insurance.

Most American families who do have insurance have it by way of their employment. Few actually purchased these on their own, like the OP, who is self-employed. Others just flat-out not buy it at all and just milk the government. Others still just come to this country illegally and demand entitlement.
 
 

Again, where is it written that all four must go back to the FSU every year? I have a friend, a Russian woman, who has never been back in over 12 years. Now, she has plenty of money, and could go every month if she wanted to, but she prefers Hawaii and Disneyland for some reason 

That would work although I don't believe the OP is interested in your friend 

[Muzh]

 
LOL, well unlike perfect families like the one Muzh has, where the kids even walked to the dealers on 3' of snow - uphill, after brushing their teeth in the morning and cleaning their bedrooms ( ) What a Brady Bunch of a family, eh? But the OP's 'kids' likely don't know who Greg is from Marsha despite knowing who Peter is...

Oy, no need to be jealous. Just telling it like it is.
 
They also walked uphill twice.
 

Anyway, yes kids can buy their own cars and pay for the insurance fully themselves. Many AM kids do that, yes! Many AM kids do not.
 

Is this why Peter here has to make over $100K? I guess those Bimmers are rather expensive. Not to mention how much to insure a teenager driving those. 

 

So for the sake of keeping this on topic, what do you think the chances of a 16 year old kid from FSU doing so at such a relatively immediate time? Nah, she can take the bus to go to her university, which is likely within the year, more or less, she arrived, right?

Holy shit Batman!
 
Peter better re-think about marrying this woman with inept and totally useless children. Or is the water in California a little bit different than in New England?
 

How well do you think (not believe) a newly arrived FSU kids would mesh right into a public school system considering obvious language difficulties? You think maybe they ought to have *special* language tutors?
 

If they drink the New England water they should be fine. I've seen quite a few Russian kids who hit the grounds running. Not to mention all the attention they got while on their first year in their new school. By the end of that year you could barely notice their accent. Just like in the Brady Bunch.

Of course charter schools are making huge headway in their academia lately, but the fact remains these kids won't exactly be the same as those already born into this system. At least not in the immediate future they arrive.
 

What in the world are you talking about? The majority of these kids (FSU) have better study habits than the kids here. My wife's best friend had a pre-teenage girl when she came to NY. After six months in (public) schools she was asked by the school's administration if she would agree to advance her daughter to a higher grade. Her mother declined because she felt it was more important for her daughter's social development. She's done with HS for almost two years and doing fine right now. Yes, I know it is one example. However, this girl is pretty much an average Russian girl that was moved to a different country and a different culture.
 

If you keep reading this likely 2 more times, then you can snatch the pebble from my hand.  Lather, rinse, repeat. The point will not be missed.

You know GQ, normaly you give advice that is very pragmatic. Why veer into the extreme?

[Misha]

For the exercise, I'll use most of your sampling to its bare minimum:
 
Since I filed K1, and assuming so would the OP, then I'll cite what their approximate costs will be. He can file for I-130 instead of I-129f/I-130, but there will be add cost for him going there to do so...
 
Visas/Medical              $ 2,000.00
Tickets (OP's x 4)        $  3,360.00
AOS, (765), AP            $ 4,000.00
Food (yours x4)           $10,200.00
Clothes (yours x4)        $ 6,800.00
Insurance (Gator's x 4)  $ 16,000.00 (hope no one requires to spend that 10K deductible)
Dental (kids visits?)       $ 1,000.00 (?) 
One kid trip visit            $1,100.00   

Technically, the $100 per month for clothes was for the both both of us, so if you se our numbers it should be x2, not four, so clothes would be $2,400 and not $6,600.

Using your numbers, then, the cost is really as follows:

Cost to bring them to the USA including all the visa costs and the AOS = $9,360
Cost of living with four new people per year (with health insurance) = $30,700
Cost of living with four new people per year (not including health insurance) = $14,700

In other words, the OP should have already in hand the $9,360 to pay for the visa and other costs to bring them to the USA and rationally should seek a job where hew will have some form of health insurance included    If he does that, then the cost of the new family would be an extra $15k or so. Sure, it is is extra money, but a far cry from 100k. Of course, if hypothetically speaking his wife does something crazy like get a job with health insurance included, the next thing you know she will be earning the iPods/iPads and the trips to Disneyland, the family treks back to the homeland...
 

Add all these up, it totals to almost $44,500.00. That's bare minimum according to your information. They all stayed home the entire year. No entertainment, no vacation, zip, nada.

As noted, you inflated the clothing costs, so it really is $40k. However, most of that sum is the one time moving and visa costs and of course the health insurance costs. If he or she were to get coverage through work, most of that 40k would no longer have to be paid. 

No toys, hobbies, activities, no PUBLIC schools related expense, zip, nada.
No road trips, no gas used to zip here and there for whatever reason, zip, nada.
No expense for wedding, no goodbye celebration expense, zip, nada.
No additional car, insurance, gas zip, nada.

There are many hobbies that are free and one can enjoy life without spending a fortune. Public librairies even offer these things called books (as well as movies, music and much else) for free
 

So you can be as cute and frugal you'd wanna be and try to make this reality out to be the way you'd like Misha, but the 44G exercise above to the high number I cited of 125 - or somewhere in between is the OP's reality. And everyone else can ask themselves where their respective reality is.

Again, it is really $40k, of that $10k is the one-time moving and visa expenses (+AOS) and of the remaining most is health insurance. The cost of living minus the health insurance is roughly $15k and even here you could pare down that number. If he has a garden in back, you could grow a lot of food that would save on food costs and if anything the cost of food is often cheaper in the USA than in Canada.
 

...or one can take ML's Bloomberg estimate, divided by 18 years - multiplied by 3 accordingly by their respective years: $226,000/18= 12,600/child x 3 = $37,800. Now add visa cost plus Mumski's expense, plus tickets, etc...

Spin it however you want, but we still don't have the $100k you said it would cost.
 

...or, for a 3rd sampling, Gator can tell us exactly how much he spent with his ex-wife plus two kids their first year here. Divide that by 3 then multiplied by 4.

Or take Muzh's experience as he was able to support his family somehow on 50k per year 
 

[Misha]

That would work although I don't believe the OP is interested in your friend 

As cheap zingers go, this one is actually not bad. Still does not detract from my point that not all women from the FSU insist on going back to their home country every year or even multiple times per year 

[Muzh]

For the exercise, I'll use most of your sampling to its bare minimum:
 
Since I filed K1, and assuming so would the OP, then I'll cite what their approximate costs will be. He can file for I-130 instead of I-129f/I-130, but there will be add cost for him going there to do so...
 
Visas/Medical              $ 2,000.00
Tickets (OP's x 4)        $  3,360.00
AOS, (765), AP            $ 4,000.00
Food (yours x4)           $10,200.00
Clothes (yours x4)        $ 6,800.00
Insurance (Gator's x 4)  $ 16,000.00 (hope no one requires to spend that 10K deductible)
Dental (kids visits?)       $ 1,000.00 (?) 
One kid trip visit            $1,100.00   
 
Add all these up, it totals to almost $44,500.00. That's bare minimum according to your information.
 

Hmm.
 
I-129f - $340. (There is no fee for petitions for K-3 status based on an immigrant petition filed by the same U.S. citizen.)
 
Affidavit of support I-134 - $0
 
Application to Register Permanent Residence or Adjust Status I-485 - $985. (Add $85 biometric fee for a total of $1070, where applicable. See the form instructions for payment details.)
 
Petition to Remove the Conditions of Residence I-751 $505. (Add $85 biometric fee for a total of $590, where applicable.)
 
Am I missing any forms? If not that adds up to $1900
 
Can't remember if he is flying to RUS or UA so I'll include both
 
Flight R/T BOS to SVO $735 x 4 = $2940
Flight R/T BOS to KBP  $852 x 4 = $3480
 
AND One kid trip visit ~ $800
 
Ladies and gents, everything else is irrelevant since it will cost the same if he marries someone from New England, Russia or Timbuktu. Also, lobstah in New England is a lot cheaper than California sushi. If we are discusing the other points, are we telling Peter he cannot marry at all because it is too expensive?
 
So that leaves us with a one time expenditure of ~ $6100
 
 

[GQBlues]

Oy, no need to be jealous. Just telling it like it is.
 
They also walked uphill twice.
 

Sure. This is the internet, man. I gotcha...
 

Is this why Peter here has to make over $100K? I guess those Bimmers are rather expensive. Not to mention how much to insure a teenager driving those. 

 
Yada, yada..crunch us some numbers, will you. Let's see...minimum wage is how much, $8/hr?
if that 16-17 year old worked full-time, it's $320/wk.., etc....you ought to be able to spill numbers out Muzh seeing as your own kids had done this. Tell us how much 'teenager rates' are in your town. You can even make this look nice by telling me their autos were added to your own policy simply by naming them as additional drivers/insured. I don't care how you do it, but just give (the OP) us numbers to talk about instead of endless drivels.

 

Holy shit Batman!
 
Peter better re-think about marrying this woman with inept and totally useless children. Or is the water in California a little bit different than in New England?
 
If they drink the New England water they should be fine. I've seen quite a few Russian kids who hit the grounds running. Not to mention all the attention they got while on their first year in their new school. By the end of that year you could barely notice their accent. Just like in the Brady Bunch.

Sure, and I have seen a few kids who needed additional attention (tutoring) to make the transition in the beginning. Unless you're clueless of this reality or just simply deny it happens to serve your cause. So, from Peter's POV, how do you plan on something like this that realistically can go either way.

What in the world are you talking about? The majority of these kids (FSU) have better study habits than the kids here. My wife's best friend had a pre-teenage girl when she came to NY. After six months in (public) schools she was asked by the school's administration if she would agree to advance her daughter to a higher grade. Her mother declined because she felt it was more important for her daughter's social development. She's done with HS for almost two years and doing fine right now. Yes, I know it is one example. However, this girl is pretty much an average Russian girl that was moved to a different country and a different culture.

LOL.
 
Based on that response, you obviously hadn't the clue what Charter School is. It's OK, neither did Mike and Carol. So here...
 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charter_school
 
Read so you can act like you always knew, which I'm very certain you will...
 
 

You know GQ, normaly you give advice that is very pragmatic. Why veer into the extreme?

Veer into the extreme? LOL.
 
Actually, the reality is none of any of this was actually tabled for the OP. This site is available for all not only as a venue to pat folks in the back and scream rah-rahs or be engaged on endless drivels.  Or worst, a venue to use to try and convince folks in the internet how perfect their lives are (LOL) as obviously no one else in reality believes them.
 
 
No, you share information to others based upon your own experiences, along with others who had gone before, so that others that follow may take all or a little within these info and usefully apply them unto their own and thereby make better judgment.
 
 
I laid out my last post with Misha, based on his personal criteria/experience, Bare minimum using his frugal way of life, adopted to the OP's situation, is in the range of $45,000.00. I estimated this will likely cost him, all things considered as shown on my very first post on this thread, more in the vicinity of 100-125K.
 
 
Now, you can be helpful and start contributing to the exercise instead of continually blathering about your kid's ability to jump high buildings on the single bounce. It's pointless. Everyone already believe you, OK. So, your choice...
 
 
Sheeessh.

[GQBlues]

...Ladies and gents, everything else is irrelevant since it will cost the same if he marries someone from New England, Russia or Timbuktu. Also, lobstah in New England is a lot cheaper than California sushi. If we are discusing the other points, are we telling Peter he cannot marry at all because it is too expensive?

 
No it isn't...a local gal would likely already have a job, and all the other life belongings a foreign woman will not, etc...

[GQBlues]

....

If you don't understand what 'bare minimum' is, I can't help you. If you somehow believe $200.00/mo is enough to clothe a woman and her 3 children, then more power to you.
 
There was a RM who married a woman from Moscow. She came here with her 19 year old son. We all lived in a Marina complex where they had boat docks located right in the middle of the property. Anyway, all the unit's water heaters are heated by electricity, so that can get pretty expensive, you know. The guy (he is actually a doctor) was so frugal he had his SIL take shower from the boater's washroom because his bills started to take a bite out of his wallet.
 
 
Got his wife a van with this huge gash/hole on the top backside, so when it rained, they had to tape plastic over it so it won't get musty inside. LOL.
 
Was he someone you went to school with Misha? Bet you two are related. LOL.
 
Anyway, that marriage lasted 9 months...Mumski and son are now back in Moscow.

[Misha]

If you don't understand what 'bare minimum' is, I can't help you.

No, it it simply that the world does not have to live according to your standards are your bare minimum   

[Muzh]

 
Yada, yada..crunch us some numbers, will you. Let's see...minimum wage is how much, $8/hr?
if that 16-17 year old worked full-time, it's $320/wk.., etc....you ought to be able to spill numbers out Muzh seeing as your own kids had done this. Tell us how much 'teenager rates' are in your town. You can even make this look nice by telling me their autos were added to your own policy simply by naming them as additional drivers/insured. I don't care how you do it, but just give (the OP) us numbers to talk about instead of endless drivels.

Since you asked. My daughter cannot work more than 20 hr/week since she is 16. She gets paid $8.25/hr. You do the numbers. Here in the Northeast, parents put their children in their own insurance until they are of age AND have enough to pay on their own. I have no clue how is it the the country of California but my guess it is about the same. BTW, she pays ~$1200 per year because she got the Brady Bunch discount. Seriously. So Peter, check with me if you need additional info. 
 
   

Sure, and I have seen a few kids who needed additional attention (tutoring) to make the transition in the beginning. Unless you're clueless of this reality or just simply deny it happens to serve your cause. So, from Peter's POV, how do you plan on something like this that realistically can go either way.

Very good point. Peter should get an IQ estimation and an assessment from a child psychologist and determine if these children are totally inept or the can hold their own. If they are to be hand held, I suggest to Peter to drop this woman like a hot potato. Not worth it. <sarcasm>
 

Based on that response, you obviously hadn't the clue what Charter School is. It's OK, neither did Mike and Carol. So here...
 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charter_school
 
Read so you can act like you always knew, which I'm very certain you will...

I know what charter schools are BUT do YOU know the situation where Peter lives? If not, then mum please.
 
 

 

No, you share information to others based upon your own experiences, along with others who had gone before, so that others that follow may take all or a little within these info and usefully apply them unto their own and thereby make better judgment.
 

Right. My experience is useless because it is not the same as yours. Not to mention that the country of California offers a better example of actual living in the Northeast than people who live in the Northeast. Silly me.

 

I laid out my last post with Misha, based on his personal criteria/experience, Bare minimum using his frugal way of life, adopted to the OP's situation, is in the range of $45,000.00. I estimated this will likely cost him, all things considered as shown on my very first post on this thread, more in the vicinity of 100-125K.
 

As I mentioned earlier, aside of the one-time shots of visas/paperwork and trips, everything else you have pointed out to him clearly indicates that Peter would be irresponsible to even consider marriage with any woman who has children. Very nice. You heard it right there Peter.

Now, you can be helpful and start contributing to the exercise instead of continually blathering about your kid's ability to jump high buildings on the single bounce. It's pointless. Everyone already believe you, OK. So, your choice...

Jealosy does not suit you, did you know that? 
 
I think I'll refrain from contributing publicly on this thread because my blathering is annoying the annointed one. What I'll do is offer Peter my advice in private, as we've done already.

[GQBlues]

Since you asked. My daughter cannot work more than 20 hr/week since she is 16. She gets paid $8.25/hr. You do the numbers. Here in the Northeast, parents put their children in their own insurance until they are of age AND have enough to pay on their own. I have no clue how is it the the country of California but my guess it is about the same. BTW, she pays ~$1200 per year because she got the Brady Bunch discount. Seriously. So Peter, check with me if you need additional info.     

Good info. That's what I'm talkin' about!...so when all is said and done, these kids really aren't getting their own car plus all their expenses on their own, no? In more ways than one, they still are somewhat causing 'some' additional cost to the household expense, no?
 

......

 
LOL. The rest of your post is nothing more than a silly attempt to thump your chest some more...see what I mean?
 
You just can't help it, can you? LOL.

[Misha]

If you somehow believe $200.00/mo is enough to clothe a woman and her 3 children, then more power to you.

Also, forgot to add, sure $200 is not enough if you buy piles of designer clothes, but if you explore other options (garage sales, yards sales, online sales...) you can easily get good clothes for children for quite cheap bought from the people who love status so much that they buy piles of expensive clothes that the kids outgrow before they actually get a chance to wear it 

[GQBlues]

Also, forgot to add, sure $200 is not enough if you buy piles of designer clothes, but if you explore other options (garage sales, yards sales, online sales...) you can easily get good clothes for children for quite cheap bought from the people who love status so much that they buy piles of expensive clothes that the kids outgrow before they actually get a chance to wear it     

 
LOL.        WTF!
 
So to hit your $200/mo clothing allowance, the OP need to hunt for garage/yard sales to clothe his new family to make this work, I see. LOL.
 
Funny how things can be so ironic when you come full circle, you know...is it you now who's being facetious?
 
Bare minimum is simply that, bare minimum. It means while you've noted probable, highly probable, somewhat probable, potential, etc...cost components in your budget, you didn't include it in despite understanding there's better than a good chance they'll arrive at your doorsteps one way or another.
 
SO, you do what many of us folks do, called contingency planning.
 
I don't care if Peter plans to drag his family to their neighborhood's garage sales every weekend so they can indulge themselves to the luxury of filling their wardrobe. But it is contingent upon him to at the very LEAST, explain this reality to his future wife and family before anything else, no?
 
 

[Misha]

 
LOL.        WTF!
 
So to hit your $200/mo clothing allowance, the OP need to hunt for garage/yard sales to clothe his new family to make this work, I see. LOL.

You missed the point completely, there are ways of saving money when buying clothes and that you don't have to go down to the Gap or whatever other boutique and buy clothes off the rack. Many, perhaps even most, families look for other options whether sales or used or hand-me-downs to clothe their kids.
 

Funny how things can be so ironic when you come full circle, you know...is it you now who's being facetious?

No, but then again most of the Russian women that I know love to go shopping at our local used clothing store 
 

Bare minimum is simply that, bare minimum. It means while you've noted probable, highly probable, somewhat probable, potential, etc...cost components in your budget, you didn't include it in despite understanding there's better than a good chance they'll arrive at your doorsteps one way or another.

Running out of arguments I see. The fact of the matter is that clothes are easier to budget for and find savings. They don't have an expiry date and if you take care of clothes they can last years or decades. If you simply buy when you find deals and buy what is necessary (i.e. not simply to fill closets with clothes that will never be worn), then you don't have to spend that much on clothes.
 

I don't care if Peter plans to drag his family to their neighborhood's garage sales every weekend so they can indulge themselves to the luxury of filling their wardrobe. But it is contingent upon him to at the very LEAST, explain this reality to his future wife and family before anything else, no?

Sure, and if he found the right woman, I am sure she will even find new ways for him to save money 

[GQBlues]

You missed the point completely, there are ways of saving money when buying clothes and that you don't have to go down to the Gap or whatever other boutique and buy clothes off the rack. Many, perhaps even most, families look for other options whether sales or used or hand-me-downs to clothe their kids.
 

No, but then again most of the Russian women that I know love to go shopping at our local used clothing store 
 

Running out of arguments I see. The fact of the matter is that clothes are easier to budget for and find savings. They don't have an expiry date and if you take care of clothes they can last years or decades. If you simply buy when you find deals and buy what is necessary (i.e. not simply to fill closets with clothes that will never be worn), then you don't have to spend that much on clothes.
 

Sure, and if he found the right woman, I am sure she will even find new ways for him to save money     

Yeah, sure Misha. I'm sure Peter can also find a shelter in his neighborhood so he can get his new family on a soup line every Wednesday night. Great way for a family to spend quality time together. Those pea soup is tolerable, but the chicken noodle soup is much less to be desired. LOL.
 
I'm sure those used, previously owned, mix-matched clothing the family will be wearing will make them all fit right in. However, mumski may have a bit of a problem finding something her size considering ALL AWs are fat according to the lot of you. LOL. 
 

I'm also certain many FSUWs are tripping over one another in Ukraine ready to sacrifice all that she has ever known hoping for such a life with folks like you. Oh boy!
 

Great points and contribution, dude. It is so realistic....
 
I bet their eyes would light up everytime they see signs like this...
 

[Misha]

GQ, I am still happily married to a woman who loves, so guys like us do well. But, I am out of here. Feel free to rant away...

[Gator]

 

...or, for a 3rd sampling, Gator can tell us exactly how much he spent with his ex-wife plus two kids their first year here. Divide that by 3 then multiplied by 4.
 

 

Or take Muzh's experience as he was able to support his family somehow on 50k per year 

 
 
Everyone is different. 
 
The incremental cost of the kids was not that great in my opinion.  Nights out on the town decline and become replaced by family life:   potluck picnics with AM/RW families,  watching soccer games, attending recitals where no one can hit a note, school gatherings, and ordering pizza for movie night at home.  We had no extraordinary expenses such a bad illness.  One year of private school for the boy was $15,000  but that was on trial basis and would not have been continued. 
 
Without doubt the wife was  the largest expense:  English lessons at the university, expense of her having a car to drive (the Lexus stayed with me when we divorced), real estate school, etc.  The largest line item expense was my attorney for a prenup  (money well spent as his fees were greater than the amount I paid to settle the divorce).
 
In my opinion a new AM-RW family can easily adjust their lifestyle to fit the AM's income provided the wife is satisfied with such a lifestyle (as seems to be the case with M&M (Muzh and Misha).  Some of the happiest times of my life were first as a starving student and later as a newlywed working at an entry-level job.  I met a few AM/RW couples who impressed me as living a basic lifestyle, yet they seemed happy.  I suppose health is the wildcard variable.
 
Also, keep in mind that the AM's lifestyle even with severe financial constraints is probably a step up for the RW.  Just be sure of your wife's expectations.  Even if your lifestyle is a step up, I imagine some RW want far more.   

[GQBlues]

GQ, I am still happily married to a woman who loves, so guys like us do well. But, I am out of here. Feel free to rant away...

So one last thing (LOL)...
 
Once you & Mrs. get back home from your weekly garage sale loot and find out the pants didn't fit you, do you actually drive back to get a refund? Do the Mrs go with you since there's really only one car in the household, or, do you both take the bus to accomplish this mission while carefully carrying the one pair of pants with you? Do they wrap it in a brown paper bag, or in those grocery plastic ones? Do you streamline these times where you can go stop at the grocers, barbershop, etc...to maximize your use of gas? LOL, these info might be useful for the OP, you know.
 
 

[artisan5308]

 :deadhorse:Think it's time to close this thread

[GQBlues]

...
Everyone is different....

 
 
Of course they are, as do situations...
 
What these dynamic duo is missing are these very simple facts.
 
1. Misha lives in Canada, so inherently health coverage isnt much of a problem. Muzh was likely gainfully employed so his Mrs can be easily added unto his employment coverage. The OP is self-employed thus health coverage isn't as readily had. It'll cut more extensively in his available funds where the dynamic didn't have to factor that in.
 
2. We now know where Misha shops, and Muzh's alleged 50K is worth what today? $70,000.00?
 
3. Both of them only had to care for one beneficiary, whereas the OP has 4.
 
 
This really wasn't to tough to figure out. These things should not not be taken lightly, especially health care. When it involves children, even more so. But, maybe that's just me.

[Muzh]

:deadhorse:Think it's time to close this thread

Well, I guess the annointed one managed to kill it for good.

[GQBlues]

Well, I guess the annointed one managed to kill it for good.

LOL. Exactly. 3 years is long enough.
 
But hopefully in a year's time we can erase the collective wisdom of a band of idiots who thought they knew better , as always, back in  '08. Know what I mean?

[artisan5308]

I've tried to post a few pics already..to no avail. Maybe they are too large. Funny that i can post them on other sites though, suggestions anyone?

let me try again

[artisan5308]

shrank them, it worked

[artisan5308]

previous post pic taken at biker bar in kiev

this one in Yalta