Hi from Washington

[2jake55]

Hi everyone my name is Jake. I am a 55 year old man who raised 2 daughters by himself. I stopped dating way back when because I wanted to give my daughters all of my attention. So going back into the dating pool has been, well hell!
I am in decent shape and a fairly good looking guy with decent income but the pickings has been rather empty here. I found a Russian dating site (Dream Marriage) rather by accident. I am a little embarrassed as I have probably spent a little too much money on it. I feel that some of the women are legit and some not. My problem is I can't make myself trust any of them.
Anyway I am interested in a variety of topics like: Is there a better way to go forward? What should I really expect from a Ukrainian woman? and so on.
So thanks ahead of time and I look forward to communicating with all of you.

[artisan5308]

Hi Jake,

Welcome to the site. I'm a newbie here myself.

What I found when I first started communicating with RW using online dating sites was that the ladies all seemed interested in meeting me. The sites advise you to communicate with several women and not to key in on just one. That is sound advice from the standpoint that you get to see "what's out there". It is better to stick with writing letters initially, several if you can afford to. Before I decided to make a trip to meet my fiance, I wrote back and forth to her at least thirty five times. Eventually the agency allowed her to give me contact info (cell phone) and I spoke to her several times. It's a big gamble for sure, but you can learn a lot from a persons letters. However, it is when you speak in person you are able to put the voice to the face and get a sense of authenticity that the person and the letters are from the same person. The agency needs to make a buck so they will try to get their fill from you. Eventually you are on your own, come what may. Hope this helps.

[Manny]

Anyway I am interested in a variety of topics like: Is there a better way to go forward?

I suspect many here would suggest Dream Marriage is not a suitable place to start. They do have a certain reputation.

What should I really expect from a Ukrainian woman? and so on.

Just a question: Are you fixed on the idea of Ukraine? And if so, why not Russia?

There is a learning curve that you will latch onto as you read more on sites such as this. You will soon get a feeling for the direction that suits you, and armed with reasonable expectations and some good advice, you will make progress.

Welcome to the site. 

[2jake55]

Thanks Artesian and Manny,
I am not so stuck on Ukraine although I know several people that are from Lviv. It just seems like most of the women I have written so far are from there.
If DM is not as reputable as I would like; any suggestions?

[artisan5308]

try freepersonals.ru 

it is absolutely free and the women post pics that are realistic......very few model shots.

[ML]

 Hi Jake:

Avoid all agencies and any websites that require pay per contacting each woman and/or pay per each letter.

Instead go here:

http://singles.ru/
http://www.luckylovers.net/
http://www.rbrides.com/
http://www.ukrainedate.com/
http://www.allsinglerussiangirls.com/
http://freepersonals.ru/
http://bride.ru/
http://fdating.com
http://www.1vipdating.com/
http://freeukrainianwomen.com/
http://okfreedating.net/
http://luckylifepartner.com/

The below are in Russian language.
 
 http://www.edarling.ru/
 http://vmireznakomstv.ru/
 http://www.your-ideal.com/
 http://www.24open.ru/
 http://loveplanet.ru/
 http://www.maybe.ru/
 http://znakomstva-sitelove.ru/

Go to the above free and monthly cost ($19-30) websites.  Make up a nice profile of yourself.  Use the search engines to find about 800 - 1,000 women who are in the age range you want and have the education, height, weight, language, children, drinking, smoking, etc., parameters that you desire and are in a single target geographical area.

Do this screening first rather than look at pictures first.  After you have done the screening; then look at the pictures.

When you are two months away from your trip departure time, then start sending out your first message.

Send a generic but well written introductory message to all with each individual name typed at the top.

Of those  who reply, filter out all who make you worry in any way or give you concerns.

Send second generic but well written letter to all with their individual names typed at the top.  Modify it a bit to answer any questions that an individual woman may have asked.  Yes, this takes a lot of time.

Repeat these procedures over about 6-8 weekly emails and you will have narrowed down your list to 15-30 gals.  You can continue to use a generic letter for each successive mailing, but be sure to modify it a bit to answer specific questions any gal may have asked and to ask specific questions of your own related to the family, interests, jobs, etc., of each individual woman.  Yes, this takes a lot of time, but each week you will be cutting your list down. 

Finalize your trip plans and start scheduling the women into time slots.

If you follow the above procedure, you will not have any concers about scammers, etc., as you will have filtered out all scammers.  And if any of the women you are writing to give you any sheeeeet or cause you any concern at all, or ask for money for ANYTHING you simply drop them off your lists and continue on.

[TwoBitBandit]

ML's advice is great.


Pay-per-letter sites are usually scams.


I especially recommend that you read the trip reports section.  You can look at what different guys did, how it worked out for them and whether that is the right path for you.  Here's a trip report I wrote last year: http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=11863.0


I went to Novosibirsk.  I set up a FREE profile on mamba.ru.  I spent about $100 having Anastasia Ash (http://www.regaltranslations.com/index.htm) professionally edit my profile so the content and grammar was impeccable.


I wrote to seven hundred girls starting about two months before I left.  I ended up meeting about twenty of them over a two-week period, and I'm still seeing one of them.  I'm optimistic about my relationship with her.


I speak fluent Russian, so I was able to pull this off by myself.  But you could do the same thing paying by-the-hour for interpreters.  You'll meet far more sincere girls on Russian-language sites paying for interpreters than you will on "mail-order bride" sites paying by the letter.


If you don't want to pay for interpreters, then use one of the FREE sites above that caters to English-speaking girls.  The important thing is to be aware that most pay-per-letter sites are scams, especially if the agency covers a wide geographical area.  (There are some honest mom-and-pop agencies that charge by the letter, but they usually only serve a single city and they're a dying breed.)  Most pay-by-the-letter agencies are scams.

[Muzh]

Hi Jake and 
 
You are going through the live and learn phase. Relax and ask questions.
 
My unsolicited advise is avoid sending money. Also, you'll need an open mind to do this.
 
Russia vs Ukraine is that you don't need a visa to go to Ukraine. If you go to Russia, you'll need to find an outfit that will get your visa and once there you have to register so the KGB government will know where you are. In terms of the ladies, I'd say they are equally beautiful and commited, however, some here would argue that Ukrainian women are, well, not lady-like.
 
My other unsolicited advice, stick with women who knows English. Plenty of posts discussing the limitations or fallacy of the advantages of English-speaking FSU women.
 
Most of all, have fun.

[kmin]

Hi Jake,

I would have to give good recommendation to freepersonals.ru   

Free site, can't pay for anything on site at all.  Most women on there are serious and real, but be careful and read the advise on this site.

freepersonals.ru is where I met my girlfriend and she is great.

Remember never send any money to someone you have not met.

[Mila]

Hi Jake,
To my mind, free web sites are much better than agencies, but it doesn't mean that there are no scam. You just have to be always careful and smart and never send any money to the ladies!
I wish you only luck and hope it will work for you  

[Faux Pas]

Hi Jake and welcome to RWD!


Dream Marriage hasn't a good reputation from many who has used them. Pay by the letter sites rarely do. I'm surprised no one has mentioned www.elenasmodels.com yet. It does require a membership for a good effort but, most of the ladies are real and only an email away.


Good luck there fella! 

[veritas]

Dream Marriage hasn't a good reputation from many who has used them. Pay by the letter sites rarely do. I'm surprised no one has mentioned www.elenasmodels.com yet. It does require a membership for a good effort but, most of the ladies are real and only an email away.

+1 on both DM and EM -- I've had enough dealings with each to know that Faux Pas is right on here ...

BTW, Faux Pas, IIRC, didn't you meet your wife through Elena's Models?

Kevin

[jeff9556]

Hi Jake, I am pretty new here also, I use EM and mamba.ru, met some wonderful women through each site. I also used RussianCupid for a while (my first attempt), and while there are some genuine women there are also a lot of scammers (but very easy to weed out, if you use it watch out for women contacting you without viewing your profile, a sure sign).

With EM I found you have to really stick your neck out and make a lot of effort to contact the women, but it pays off. I'm currently in contact with a few on a regular basis but haven't really found a strong connection, yet, one is looking very promising though - this is out of probably over 80 I contacted, and maybe 50% of those have turned into a few emails or Skype chats, then whittled down to a handful.

The main thing with EM is the ratio of men to women is huge, so you have to go hard. Another site I looked at and am thinking about joining is http://www.verifiedrussiangirls.com (not sure if it was mentioned earlier), looks pretty good, but I will only join when my subscription runs out on EM and if I don't make a connection prior to that.

[Faux Pas]

+1 on both DM and EM -- I've had enough dealings with each to know that Faux Pas is right on here ...

BTW, Faux Pas, IIRC, didn't you meet your wife through Elena's Models?

Kevin

Indeed I did. I was a member for about 2 years and never did find a single scammer (on EMs).

[Eduard]

Hey Jake,
Welcome to the forum. Just wanted to mention that you are at a good age to have incredible amount of women who would be interested in you, as long as you keep your age gap parameters realistic. What are the age parameters that you have in mind for your future mate?

[calmissile]

Jake,

I see that you are from the US.  One of the things you might want to consider is the high cost of making trips to Ukraine.  Many of us in the US have used Skype to narrow down the field considerably before spending the money to travel to Ukraine.  You can learn a great deal about each other with regular Skype chats.

Also, as Eduard mentioned, you can find a lot of women interested in your age group.  You can also expand the field considerably by accepting a woman that has a child.  It is far less common to find a woman over 30 without at least one child.  Most of them without children want children so you might consider whether it is better to have new babies or raising one half grown

Good luck

Doug

[SteveOR]

I went to Novosibirsk.  I set up a FREE profile on mamba.ru.  I spent about $100 having Anastasia Ash (http://www.regaltranslations.com/index.htm) professionally edit my profile so the content and grammar was impeccable.

I agree with TwoBit about Anastassia Ash.  Top notch work at a fair price.  I highly recommend her.