Intimacy..any rules existing?

[justme100]

Good evening,gentlemen(ladies are are also welcome ).
Here comes a question from Russian lady(well, Ukranian in fact) to men)
the hot discussion is held now on the same forum but from the women part.Some are already banned so the thred is really hot.
The question is when to your mind is the right moment for intimacy between man and a woman?first meeting, second meeting?are there any rules?are there any prejudices among men as to this?
The opinions were expressed among women, that this is only the question of readiness of both and nothing more.Others aggressively deny this, claiming that if woman agrees to have sex with a man during the first meeting(talking about the first meeting i mean not first day,but the whole first meeting in general,the terms vary).man will have negative opinion of her as abroad all decent women have a rule of 3 dates, meaning intimacy can be not earlier than 3 dates.
So, what REALLY men think as to this?

[Eduard]

[size=78%]The opinions were expressed among women, that this is only the question of readiness of both and nothing more.[/size]

+1

[justme100]

+1

+1 

[Eduard]

Good evening,gentlemen(ladies are are also welcome ).
Here comes a question from Russian lady(well, Ukranian in fact) to men)
the hot discussion is held now on the same forum but from the women part.Some are already banned so the thred is really hot.
The question is when to your mind is the right moment for intimacy between man and a woman?first meeting, second meeting?are there any rules?are there any prejudices among men as to this?
The opinions were expressed among women, that this is only the question of readiness of both and nothing more.Others aggressively deny this, claiming that if woman agrees to have sex with a man during the first meeting(talking about the first meeting i mean not first day,but the whole first meeting in general,the terms vary).man will have negative opinion of her as abroad all decent women have a rule of 3 dates, meaning intimacy can be not earlier than 3 dates.
So, what REALLY men think as to this?

Althoughsome cultural and religious considerations might come into play as well, and those will change things.

[CDW]

Good evening,gentlemen(ladies are are also welcome ).
Here comes a question from Russian lady(well, Ukranian in fact) to men)
the hot discussion is held now on the same forum but from the women part.Some are already banned so the thred is really hot.
The question is when to your mind is the right moment for intimacy between man and a woman?first meeting, second meeting?are there any rules?are there any prejudices among men as to this?
The opinions were expressed among women, that this is only the question of readiness of both and nothing more.Others aggressively deny this, claiming that if woman agrees to have sex with a man during the first meeting(talking about the first meeting i mean not first day,but the whole first meeting in general,the terms vary).man will have negative opinion of her as abroad all decent women have a rule of 3 dates, meaning intimacy can be not earlier than 3 dates.
So, what REALLY men think as to this?

Who decide it should be 3rd meeting? !!!!

It should be decided by both men and women whether they have sex during the 1st meeting or 4th meeting or 36th meeting!! 

[calmissile]

I can only relate to my personal experience with Ukraine women.....
Some women desire sex after being comfortable with you... only a few days.
Other women take longer to warm up.. maybe a week or so.
Lesson to me.... Let the woman decide.  She will be sure to let you know when it is time for her to take a shower.  LOL
Trying to "Be a man" and be assertive about having sex pisses off the women and they do not respect you.  Just my experience.
Being patient works.... hardly any of them I have met are frigid.  LOL

[justme100]

Lesson to me.... Let the woman decide.

Very right conclusion in fact but what i was asking is if the evaluation of a woman in man's eyes suffer if this happens too soon?Considering the woman is regarded for serious.

[LAman]

I think it is more an individual decision by both parties but there are differences in how intimacy is looked at by men and women. For men it is about sex and for women it is about emotions.
I do know many men that would think negative about intimacy too soon...the rational ( from a man) is women will/have sleep with many men.
I have also heard the thoughts from women that men come to FSU as 'sex tourists'......
I have always felt that intimacy should be held in high regard and 2 people should share feelings from the heart instead of the hormones.

[LAman]

Very right conclusion in fact but what i was asking is if the evaluation of a woman in man's eyes suffer if this happens too soon?Considering the woman is regarded for serious.

Just a thought justme..... assuming a girl is serious. There are many guys that will do or say......almost anything to get a girl to sleep with him. How will a girl know rather quickly what a man's real intentions are?

[justme100]

 LAman,thanks for your post,i really liked what you've written.
And as to your question, I don't know what to say...Not sure all men are so vigorous in lie  so that women do not to notice the true intentions.maybe sometimes women should just  take off their pink glasses and turn on their brain in working mode?

[calmissile]

Very right conclusion in fact but what i was asking is if the evaluation of a woman in man's eyes suffer if this happens too soon?Considering the woman is regarded for serious.

Sorry, I missed the question the first time I read it.

In my experience, I do not think less of a women that wants to have sex early in the first real meeting.  It seems more appropriate when you have had lengthy chats on line and got to know each other to some extent beforehand.  In any case, it does not affect my judgement towards her, although I understand the logic and feelings of those that are offended by early sex.  I guess it is up to the person.

Being a little analytical............. if you both have the goal of being together for life, you both plan to have sex at some point.  What's the reason for prolonging the inevitable?  Might as well find out soon if the compatibility is mutual.   LOL

[Misha]

So, what REALLY men think as to this?

Personally, when I was dating, if a woman did not show any signs of interest after a few dates, I would move on. For example, if after two or three dates, we had not even kissed, I would take it as a sign that there was no reciprocated physical attraction... So, I would say, that in most cases not enough intimacy would be more negative than too much too quickly...

[Eduard]

I think it is more an individual decision by both parties but there are differences in how intimacy is looked at by men and women. For men it is about sex and for women it is about emotions.

[size=78%]It can also be just the opposite...[/size]

[LAman]

[size=78%]It can also be just the opposite...[/size]

That is very true Eduard.....but tell me what is more likely??

[Eduard]

That is very true Eduard.....but tell me what is more likely??

what is more likely for me may be the oppsite of what's more likely for you 

[calmissile]

Personally, when I was dating, if a woman did not show any signs of interest after a few dates, I would move on. For example, if after two or three dates, we had not even kissed, I would take it as a sign that there was no reciprocated physical attraction... So, I would say, that in most cases not enough intimacy would be more negative than too much too quickly...

Agree, but I am glad that I was patient this last time.  Almost kicked her to the curb for the very reason you stated.  LOL

Futhermore, making up for lost time is a lot of fun also!

[Gator]

.... but what i was asking is if the evaluation of a woman in man's eyes suffer if this happens too soon?  Considering the woman is regarded for serious.

Sometimes everything is so ideal as to not wait.  Any man who would devalue a serious woman simply because she did not wait is not well adjusted.    Good riddance of such men.
 
 

[TheTraveler]

Sometimes everything is so ideal as to not wait.  Any man who would devalue a serious woman simply because she did not wait is not well adjusted.    Good riddance of such men.

what he said!

great post!

[cc3]

I can only relate to my personal experience with Ukraine women.....
Some women desire sex after being comfortable with you... only a few days.
Other women take longer to warm up.. maybe a week or so.
Lesson to me.... Let the woman decide.  She will be sure to let you know when it is time for her to take a shower.  LOL
Trying to "Be a man" and be assertive about having sex pisses off the women and they do not respect you.  Just my experience.
Being patient works.... hardly any of them I have met are frigid.  LOL

+1

[EvilElvis]

Very right conclusion in fact but what i was asking is if the evaluation of a woman in man's eyes suffer if this happens too soon?Considering the woman is regarded for serious.

How soon is too soon?

I personally would prefer to leave the airport first.... 

Really though, if two people have that spark and feeling why not go for it early. It may actually help the first part of the relationship by defusing any tension that may otherwise be a nervous barrier between them, affecting communication.

I always figured a lot of awkwardness is relieved after a good frolic, providing both people are on the same page, at least you know you truly have one thing in common.

My opinion of a woman who did this would not be negative.

[jone]

Not a question of negativity.  I don't think negatively about a women who shares herself with a man.  My experience is that it tends to crystalize the relationship.  For some that means that the relationship is now a 'going concern' or that the two are a couple.  But that does not ring true for some men - or even women.

If the relationship is consumated, whether early or later, it is a watershed event and evaluations will be forthcoming.  If a man does not have interest in the woman as a mate, intimacy may be the kiss of death for the relationship.  On the other hand, intimacy could very well be the jump start into a long term relationship.

But it will crystalize any thinking that is there.  And if the women isn't sure of the man's perspective, she probably will be sure after spending intimate moments.

[ECOCKS]

Rules?


Yeah, one....there are no rules.


1st date, 3rd date, 1st visit, 5th month, American, Russian, Ukrainian, Filipina, Swahili....it's a mutual decision based on personal choices, emotions and chemistry.


Sometimes you (or her) will make a bad call. If it happens, get over it.


Rules? 

[Patagonie]

Good evening,gentlemen(ladies are are also welcome ).
Here comes a question from Russian lady(well, Ukranian in fact) to men)
the hot discussion is held now on the same forum but from the women part.Some are already banned so the thred is really hot.
The question is when to your mind is the right moment for intimacy between man and a woman?first meeting, second meeting?are there any rules?are there any prejudices among men as to this?
The opinions were expressed among women, that this is only the question of readiness of both and nothing more.Others aggressively deny this, claiming that if woman agrees to have sex with a man during the first meeting(talking about the first meeting i mean not first day,but the whole first meeting in general,the terms vary).man will have negative opinion of her as abroad all decent women have a rule of 3 dates, meaning intimacy can be not earlier than 3 dates.
So, what REALLY men think as to this?

Hi
There are no rules about intimacy.
The only one you wrote it : the question is just about to be both ready about this and nothing more.
Usually the PUA community says that 8 hours are required with the person but it can be more or it can be less, everybody is different. The key is that you are comfortable with a man. This is very important. It is why a long correspondance is greatly improving comfort.
In my opinion girls who say that you shouldn't have sex during the first travel are wrong. If they wrote this as a rule, if attraction, comfort are there and the guy is worthwhile so etablish a rule which is saying that you shouldn't have sex during guy's first trip is stupid.
The key is here : how deep do you know the guy ? Sex first date, first time you see this person, is probably too fast for a decent goal.
As man who want a serious relationship i would scratch my head if after two
hours a girl i have never met before is leaving her panties on the sofa.
But on an other hand if all is fine and i date her (VO) seriously 1/ the lack of touching by her would raise a red flag since the third meeting 2/ if all is fine and i have many signs of interest i am waiting that the next step is having sex after few days, in a VO (dating her exclusively of course). After one week of constant dating, and before leaving her, no sexual relation would be an orange flag or a red flag, at least.

[tsr1959]

A woman can expect, that most men will not kick out her of the bedroom (or where ever it may be happen....) if she shows her desire for having sex.   

From the other side it´s much more difficult and men are in need of all their knowledge about the psychology of women. And the chance to do wrong is 50%. 

If a woman is forcing a man on 1st date is one of them a real "hottie". Both should be happy about this fact.

[ML]

I see most are having a hard time focusing on the question the OP asked.

What will man think about a woman who has quick sex with him.

For me, I didn't think badly of such women.  One good thing for sure was that these women had an above average desire for sex.

Sure it crossed my  mind somewhat . . . the wondering how many other quick partners she had . . . but I pushed that aside and focused on the other aspects of the woman as to whether she was someone I wanted to be with long term.

These other aspects were intelligence, interesting conversationalist, similar interests to mine regarding daily life and free time activities, etc.

I assumed that if I kept her sexually satisfied for her high level sex drive, that she wouldn't be seeking out other men.  In any event, it is worth taking the chance, just to be with a woman having high sex drive.  At least until I am in  my  90s.

There are always men (perhaps the majority) who have this silly notion that if the woman has quick sex with them, she probably has quick sex with many.

And women, knowing this, do not have quick sex with the man they see as a potential marriage partner . . . while continuing to have quick sex with other men.  So it is a fool's game with such men who make judgements based on quick sex or no quick sex.