How do you feel about Russian Women dating in the US?

[YoungBuck]

Occasionally, I have seen a few Russian women who are living in the US, listed on the agency sites. Has anyone tried their luck with them, and what happened? I feel the proximity factor is huge, and since traditional values are learned at youth, then they should be equally as good. Also, most of these women speak fluent English which reading through the forums is a reason why many first-meets actually fail. Communication is key in my opinion.

[Lily]

Also, most of these women speak fluent English which reading through the forums is a reason why many first-meets actually fail. Communication is key in my opinion.

How come that you believe the fluent English might be a reason why many first meets fail? 
 
I'd tell you something. We RW are taught to respect attention from men. If there is an opportunity, we are inclined to accept his invitation to meet in person, even though from his profile and letters we feel that we don't quite want to meet him. If a man acts or looks outright repulsively, then women politely decline the meeting. The general thinking is something like, okay, 'he is likely would not be something interesting for me, but I think I'd go and see. Heck, what do I got to lose, jist a little time'.
 
I was told that Northern American women will not go to see a man where they feel no potential, moreover, they just won't reply in such cases. A Russian woman however will appreciate and honor his attention, although she may also feel no potential.
 
This would be one reason why people don't proceed over the first meeting.

[vwrw]

How do I feel about Russian Women dating in the US?...Well, I am fine with it as long as their behaviors help forming a favorable stereotype about RW in general.   

[Gator]

How come that you believe the fluent English might be a reason why many first meets fail? 

 
He did not express it precisely; I belive he feels the lack of English is the reason for many failures. 

I'd tell you something. We RW are taught to respect attention from men. If there is an opportunity, we are inclined to accept his invitation to meet in person, even though from his profile and letters we feel that we don't quite want to meet him. If a man acts or looks outright repulsively, then women politely decline the meeting. The general thinking is something like, okay, 'he is likely would not be something interesting for me, but I think I'd go and see. Heck, what do I got to lose, jist a little time'.
 
I was told that Northern American women will not go to see a man where they feel no potential, moreover, they just won't reply in such cases. A Russian woman however will appreciate and honor his attention, although she may also feel no potential.
 

Very interesting, very interesting indeed.
 
 

[Lily]

Very interesting, very interesting indeed.

It is, and I ask myself why this issue does not come up often on this board. RW do quite a number of things that they feel they should do, not because they want to do it. Or they just want to give a chance to any slight possibility.  Just too shy to offend the man with rejection!

[vwrw]

Also, most of these women speak fluent English which reading through the forums is a reason why many first-meets actually fail.

Many first-meets actually fail because either the Rome's or Juliette's real appearance  fails to live up to the expectations that were formed during the correspondence period.


If the Juliette is uglier than it was expected, men usually report that she did not look like her pics.
If the Romeo is uglier than Juliette was expecting, men usually report a lack of chemistry.   

[vwrw]

Also, most of these women speak fluent English which reading through the forums is a reason why many first-meets actually fail.

The strongest evidence that your assumption is incorrect is that fact that almost every "potential" couple communicates via the telephone at least a few times before meeting; therefore,  men usually have some idea of the English level  the woman possesses

[Pkeel]

Lily,

You are absolutely correct about the AW.  They think nothing of not responding or even being insulted by a man's attention.  I have been out with several AW from dating sites and none have worked out.  There was one that told me I was the man she would spend the rest of her life with on our first date.  There were many that we would share a few emails and then she would disappear.  There were many that ignored the contact and quite a few that blocked from the first email.  Many also were interested in a free dinner and nothing else.

My best experience was with a Russian woman that moved here from Magnitogorsk (sp) 15 years ago.  I valued her for her honesty and forthrightness.  She is why I joined a website for Russian women.  We were not well suited for each other and we discussed it like adults and moved on.

[BillyB]

Occasionally, I have seen a few Russian women who are living in the US, listed on the agency sites. Has anyone tried their luck with them, and what happened?

Here's a link to my thread Life Changes 2 and in the first post there is a link to part 1. Both threads talk about dozens of my experience and what happened on dates with RW living in the USA.
 
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=11638.0

[ML]

The general thinking is something like, okay, 'he is likely would not be something interesting for me, but I think I'd go and see. Heck, what do I got to lose, just a little time'.

But there is another side to this, even an ugly side.

At low end, the women who agree to such meetings are mostly wasting the man's valuable time and his money.  Leads to the idea often voiced here that the women are just interested in a free meal.

At the extreme end, the man is actually on a WOVO.  In this case, while it is true that the woman loses 'just a little time,' the man loses his entire trip.  Happens often, as we read about here.

[Larry1]

How do I feel about Russian Women dating in the US?...Well, I am fine with it as long as their behaviors help forming a favorable stereotype about RW in general.   

Before I began my search for FSUW I went out with several FSUW in the US.  Each of them helped form a favorable impression of FSUW.  Dates with them were enjoyable, like dates used to be here, and not like barely disguised job interviews, which so many first dates with AW had become.  Also, they were all attractive and not overweight.  One of them joked  that her teenage daughter who had grown up in the US ate like an American girl.  Another, originally from Georgia, was one of the most impressive women I've ever dated.

While out with one of them I asked something about Russia, but nothing related to women.  She responded, "Don't tell me YOU'RE going to Russia to find a wife!  Why is it that almost every guy I know is going to Russia to find a wife?"

Of course it involves less expense to date a FSUW in your own country.  But I will point out one significant advantage of going to FSU to find a wife instead of finding a FSUW to marry in the West.  The latter will be in huge demand among guys here.  Your chances of succeeding with her will consequently be less than your chances of succeeding with a girl of similar qualities in FSU.

[Lily]

At low end, the women who agree to such meetings are mostly wasting the man's valuable time and his money.  Leads to the idea often voiced here that the women are just interested in a free meal.

In case of an AM is going to the FSU, yes. The topic is about local relationships, though. Therefore, there is hardly a considerable waste of time, especially if a first meeting is in a Starbucks and not in an expensive eatery.

While out with one of them I asked something about Russia, but nothing related to women.  She responded, "Don't tell me YOU'RE going to Russia to find a wife!  Why is it that almost every guy I know is going to Russia to find a wife?"

A good answer to this might be, 'The reason would be quite the same as why RM in the 1990s went to Germany for a gently used Mercedes'

[ML]

In case of an AM is going to the FSU, yes. The topic is about local relationships, though.

Yes Lily, it appears I did not read the topic heading carefully enough!!
 

[Gator]

But I will point out one significant advantage of going to FSU to find a wife instead of finding a FSUW to marry in the West.  The latter will be in huge demand among guys here.  Your chances of succeeding with her will consequently be less than your chances of succeeding with a girl of similar qualities in FSU.

More confidence please.  Only one person can win the "Closest to the Pin" contest.  Why not you?  Anything is possible.

[Misha]

Occasionally, I have seen a few Russian women who are living in the US, listed on the agency sites.

I would just find it odd that they are on an agency site instead of a larger site whether lavalife or eharmony or any other such site that would have many more men looking.

[Larry1]

I would just find it odd that they are on an agency site instead of a larger site whether lavalife or eharmony or any other such site that would have many more men looking.

Yes, Misha, that surprised me too.  Every one of the FSUW I've seen on the FSUW dating sites who lives here would get far more responses on sites such as Match.com or Plenty of Fish.  It's entirely possible that they are on both local sites and FSUW sites.  I don't think the FSUW sites charge women for membership.

[mendeleyev]

I'm in agreement with Lily and Vwrw for the most part on this topic however I believe it is more than a local issue and does extend to overseas travel.

While it would be an over generalization to say that all RW would response the same, my wife calls this general type of thing as "good upbringing" in being polite. Locally that could mean a lady agreeing to meet a man just for getting to know someone new, trying out the local dating scene to see what it is like, filling an otherwise boring Friday evening with a decent guy, etc.

While she may feel the evening not wasted by meeting someone new even if the relationship goes no further than the first date there is a danger of a man having unjustified expectations about a local date. Just because she is local doesn't mean that she is desperate, isn't getting much attention, or can't get dates because of language issues, etc.

[mendeleyev]

I would just find it odd that they are on an agency site instead of a larger site whether lavalife or eharmony or any other such site that would have many more men looking.

I find that surprising too, Misha. Do you think that they are targeting men who are specifically seeking RW?

[Pkeel]

I have talked to women on POF and Match.  These women are inundated with men, I have had friends tell me that they are routinely sent photo's of naked male body parts.  These pictures are of course sent with requests to have private pictures sent back.

Maybe I am giving too much credit to men searching for an FSUW woman, but I am betting these men are more gentlemanly in their search.  I noted a few of them on Elena's and never really thought too much about why they weren't on match or POF.  I figured they were looking for men that understood proper manners.

[Misha]

I find that surprising too, Misha. Do you think that they are targeting men who are specifically seeking RW?

Yes, but the question would be why, and I can't really provide an answer.

[Boethius]

Read former member Vasilissa's comments about being on POF.   She was called a b@tch by some guy because she didn't respond to him as quickly as he deemed necessary.  Her stories seem to conform to these, relayed in old POF forum posts -
 
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts1741689.aspx
 
I know two women who met their husbands on POF.  But they were ruthless in ignoring men in whom they had no interest.  Another over 40 woman I know was on match.com.  She said she met two normal men in a year, and went on plenty of dates.  She even dated a decade younger Russian guy for a few months, but I think his er, appetites, wore her out.  She also said that most men lie about their age.
 
The women I know who have been on dating sites have had the experiences Pkeel relays.

[Misha]

I have talked to women on POF and Match.  These women are inundated with men, I have had friends tell me that they are routinely sent photo's of naked male body parts.  These pictures are of course sent with requests to have private pictures sent back.

Perhaps, but all internet dating is about filtering, triage and sifting through as many candidates as possible to find potentially suitable matches. You have to put time and effort into it to be successful, and this applies to both men and women.

[vwrw]

Yes, but the question would be why, and I can't really provide an answer.

The answer is simple...despite all the dirt that some members of this forum throw at men who look for RW, there are good men on the sites devoted to introduce RW to foreign men. At least, those RW think so.

[Muzh]

Here's a link to my thread Life Changes 2 and in the first post there is a link to part 1. Both threads talk about dozens of my experience and what happened on dates with RW living in the USA.
 
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=11638.0

Caveat: Both threads, in its entirety, should be how NOT to do it.

[vwrw]

I have not dated RW living here and probably should not speculated about them. However, I feel like I want to do it so here it goes.

First, it is important to understand what sort of individuals make up RW living here. I suppose they are:

1. Divorcees who come here with good faith to love their first trial until death makes them apart.

2. Divorcees who were brought here by so called "mules"

3. RW who arrived here as teen daughters of the Russian wives

4. "Self-delivered" RW who come here on the student or work visas.

Now, let's analyze each subgroup.

Group #1- they might be nice women but the recently ruined hopes in combination with a huge work overload may render them emotionally wrenched. A man would have to be very caring, supportive,  and patient  to earn trust of these women. However, the end result may be worthy of all the effort put in.

Be aware of the group #2

Group # 3 will have as long list of requirements that a promising candidate must possess as the  young and good looking Americans have. If you cannot get the AW, do not expect to get these RW.   

And last group # 4 must be full of gems. It takes a lot of courage, some smarts, persistence and pro-activity to accomplish what they have done. They must make good life partners.