RW: Do you want men to push the sexual envelope on a first meet?

[Gator]

Getting some western men in the search to interact with the girls seemed like a good idea at first but the honeymoon didn't last.

Years ago Dan asked me to spearhead a committee to write guidelines for men dating RW, and we produced this:
 
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?action=ezportal;sa=page;p=24
 
 
There was much uproar by RWD men when Dan and I asked AD to join the committee.  IIRC Daveman worked the most with AD representatives including asking the AD members a number of questions about men's behavior.   Kuna compiled, sorted and analyzed the AD responses.
 
I felt AD's participation was beneficial to the project.  Nevertheless the vicious and unjustified roasting of 2tallBill revealed a troubling darkside.   The leaders at AD made up their minds before all information had been presented, and there was no due process before 2tall was lynched from a tree.  Sounds familiar with some RW I have met.     RW have much pride and never, never insult them.

[Gator]

I've chatted with Kvinna and made peace. I've moved on and
put all that behind me.

Is your photo and name still on their list?

[2tallbill]

Is your photo and name still on their list?

Name yes, but on a less derogatory list and they took the photo down.

[Daveman]

Name yes, but on a less derogatory list and they took the photo down.

Oh good lord.. what is it now, six years after the fact? and you're still on any AD list? IIRC all because one of the ladies in your trip report outed herself as a participant and exploded in "victimized agony".


Those were some strange days indeed.

[2tallbill]

Oh good lord.. what is it now, six years after the fact? and you're still on any AD list? IIRC all because one of the ladies in your trip report outed herself as a participant and exploded in "victimized agony".


Those were some strange days indeed.

In August last year I was meeting an FSUW in Oregon who had a US
tourist visa. While I was driving to Oregon from North Dakota somewhere
in the State of Montana to meet her, she came across the thread. She said
that she didn't want to meet me.


I pulled over, did some fast talking. I directed her to the original thread
along with the skype addresses of two different FSUW that I've met. She
talked to one of them and then read the thread and decided I was worth
meeting after all.


In the end we didn't have chemistry but I kept in good contact with a few
of the girls that I've met in the past. They gave me sterling references about
my intentions. After reading the thread she wondered what the hell they
were even upset about.


I've been pursuing one woman since January and have been to meet her
three times. I am planning to see her again in January.

[calmissile]

I assume that with your very busy work schedule this past year, your new gal must be stateside?

[2tallbill]

I assume that with your very busy work schedule this past year, your new gal must be stateside?

No she is in Russia. I set up my busy work schedule to visit Russia as
often as possible.

[Faux Pas]

In August last year I was meeting an FSUW in Oregon who had a US
tourist visa. While I was driving to Oregon from North Dakota somewhere
in the State of Montana to meet her, she came across the thread. She said
that she didn't want to meet me.


I pulled over, did some fast talking. I directed her to the original thread
along with the skype addresses of two different FSUW that I've met. She
talked to one of them and then read the thread and decided I was worth
meeting after all.


In the end we didn't have chemistry but I kept in good contact with a few
of the girls that I've met in the past. They gave me sterling references about
my intentions. After reading the thread she wondered what the hell they
were even upset about.


I've been pursuing one woman since January and have been to meet her
three times. I am planning to see her again in January.

North Dakota, really? Last TR of yours that I read, you were in Californicate, weren't you? What would possess such a drastic change?

[GQBlues]

Congrats on you finally meeting your gal, Bill.

But going back to the AD situation, I thought what initiated that was when you posted your (I believe) first T/R that comprised of various photos showing you with different ladies where you blackened the eye areas as an attempt to mask their identity. I thought it was a member named 'Helen' (I actually liked her - feisty gal) that created the raucous because one of the photo was actually taken bedside and ultimately got you the label 'sex tourist' on AD.

'Wild Orchid' tried to protect your reputation and actually debated from your side but didn't help....

Is this not so?

[2tallbill]

North Dakota, really? Last TR of yours that I read, you were in Californicate, weren't you? What would possess such a drastic change?

The economy took a dump so I went where the jobs, money and
opportunities are[size=78%] [/size]

[2tallbill]

Congrats on you finally meeting your gal, Bill.

But going back to the AD situation, I thought what initiated that was when you posted your (I believe) first T/R that comprised of various photos showing you with different ladies where you blackened the eye areas as an attempt to mask their identity. I thought it was a member named 'Helen' (I actually liked her - feisty gal) that created the raucous because one of the photo was actually taken bedside and ultimately got you the label 'sex tourist' on AD.

'Wild Orchid' tried to protect your reputation and actually debated from your side but didn't help....

Is this not so?

The whole thing is far in the past. Your cliffnotes version is fairly
accurate.


Helen didn't instigate anything. (I like her too)
Wild Orchid did in fact help out and finally got the thread closed.
Legals Olga helped on my behalf as well.

[Елена]

"I would like to hear an answer from an actual Russian woman"
I'm a real Russian woman and I live in Russia . Now I am in search of a husband , so I can talk about it. so many women refuse to have sex on the first or second day. Mainly in Russia puritanical upbringing and many women and men consider sex for the first day of dating a sign of promiscuity and non-serious relationships. A woman is offended if she feels that her man nuzhet only sex . If the man in the beginning of the correspondence , and more difficult to talk about sex - many women stop such familiarity . easy sex speaks about the relationship without commitment. Sex is easy to find in their own country. then there is no point in spending a lot of time and effort to ask the foreign men . sex, of course , very important, but family is more important to have a mutual understanding. if there is mutual understanding and relationship with the soul, the sex will be good. Therefore, if you do not respect a woman offers her sex on the first day of dating. But , of course, can be a strong passion .

[Lily]

 A woman is offended if she feels that her man nuzhet only sex .

May I take the liberty to clarify this a little.
 
A woman feels offended if she feels that it's just sex that the man wants of her.

[Muzh]

May I take the liberty to clarify this a little.
 
A woman feels offended if she feels that it's just sex that the man wants of her.

And what else can they offer if they cannot communicate with a common language?
 
As someone here posted "point at the bulge in his pants."

[Daveman]

May I take the liberty to clarify this a little.
 
A woman feels offended if she feels that it's just sex that the man wants of her.

This is true only on Venus.


The Mars perspective would be something like, "Wow!! ... really???? IIIIIIIII think we can work with that..."   

[TomT]

I'm a real Russian woman and I live in Russia . Now I am in search of a husband , so I can talk about it. so many women refuse to have sex on the first or second day. Mainly in Russia puritanical upbringing and many women and men consider sex for the first day of dating a sign of promiscuity and non-serious relationships. A woman is offended if she feels that her man nuzhet only sex . If the man in the beginning of the correspondence , and more difficult to talk about sex - many women stop such familiarity . easy sex speaks about the relationship without commitment. Sex is easy to find in their own country. then there is no point in spending a lot of time and effort to ask the foreign men . sex, of course , very important, but family is more important to have a mutual understanding. if there is mutual understanding and relationship with the soul, the sex will be good. Therefore, if you do not respect a woman offers her sex on the first day of dating. But , of course, can be a strong passion .

Specific circumstances vary greatly but, in general, everything that you have written is reasonable.

[ML]

If there is mutual understanding and relationship with the soul, the sex will be good.

This is by no means guaranteed; no matter what with respect to understanding and soul.

Good sex is very hard to come by; and most men and women have never experienced good sex, so they think the sex they have experienced is good sex.

[Faux Pas]

This is by no means guaranteed; no matter what with respect to understanding and soul.

Good sex is very hard to come by; and most men and women have never experienced good sex, so they think the sex they have experienced is good sex.

Maybe you just ain't doing it right. The worst I had was still pretty dang good   

[Lily]

This is true only on Venus.

   

Yes. This thread asks the women's opinion, doesn't it?

[Daveman]

Yes. This thread asks the women's opinion, doesn't it?

LoL.. touche'

[Ooooops]

But , of course, can be a strong passion .

A-ha!  I knew there was a loophole! 

[Anotherkiwi]

Maybe you just ain't doing it right. The worst I had was still pretty dang good   

But how do you know?     Maybe if you had ML's sexometer with you...

[Faux Pas]

But how do you know?     Maybe if you had ML's sexometer with you...

Yanno, after the orgasm, does any of it "really" matter? 

Yeah you might have something there. Silly me. All this time I thought I was giving and receiving great sex, I find out it probably isn't even good sex.  How could I have been so wrong? Why o' why couldn't "I" have been a sexual Troubadour like ML?

I'm finding it difficult to undo all my grand memories of my great sex and labeling it "not even good sex" 

[lonedrake]

Good sex is very hard to come by

 How much more does it cost?

[mies]

Some time ago, I wrote about planning for a first meeting, and I read a few replies regarding being intimate. So I am wondering what's the importance of being intimate on a first meet? Would the total lack of sex be perceived as a deal-breaker by most women or do most people keep it PG-13?

Well, to be honest, I really don't "test drive" when dating. It makes it hard for me to be objective about a person when you mix sex into it. Plus, I know myself, and I already have all these hopes and expectations of how she would be and having sex would be like breaking a dam inside of me; I don't want to get carried away.

Now of course, I won't be cold, but I don't know what are the dating expectations of Russians. I haven't discussed sexual history with her or anything, I personally think it's a bit rude, but I get a feeling she's also a little guarded.
I'm just looking to meet her and explore her city together. Perhaps on another trip once I know where we stand and if she's serious about the whole thing.

Not sure what you mean by "intimate on a first meeting" but generally speaking, success of anything related to intimacy happening on the first meeting depends on how physically and sexually attractive you are.
If you are unattractive - it doesn't matter whether you act hot or cold. Actually, if you are unattractive and act modest it will be easier to tolerate you and will give you extra time to win her heart with your beautiful soul, whereas if you make an un-welcomed sexual pass on her - this may end your meeting short and without hopes for continuation.
There is a category of women who like confident jerks, and start finding the guy attractive if he acts like one, but there are two questions: whether you would be able to genuinely act like such guy, and why would you need a woman with psychological issues.