Is It Smart To Be "THE" One Week Wonder

[Markus]

Well, that title is an "attention getter" for those that know me via posting. I guess this is my "Hey I joined this board" statement, and my name here reflects who I am and what I did.  But, since being short on words is not my weakness, I wish to add to that "attention getter."

Let me begin by admitting that I have been an observer on this board, knowing the history of some of the posters. I have followed how Dan has dealt with people who bring in subjects of other threads, these posters using something irrelevant that they learned to try and debate.  Usually, such people are taking personal shots at someone, admitting they don't have the capability of dealing with the current subject. Dan has provided rebukes to such posters and to posters who get totally off subject with degrading agendas. I like what Dan is doing.

What I dislike are the posts from people who don't have the intellectual ability to exchange ideas, so they revert to their emotional thinking. Let me just say that I have experienced the arrogant posts from people who found a wife and use their situation as a springboard to ridicule men who are beginning this process.  When reviewing a newbies thoughts, some things stand out as "You're doing the wrong thing" such as sending money. But, I have seen men use their "opinion" to say  degrading things to men. What I have noticed on this board, knowing some of those men are on this board, is that they have "toned down" what they say. Their arrogance has decreased. I wonder, have these men learned a lesson? I think they have.

I have noticed that there isn't that much activity here, which is why some folks from RWG have made an effort to bring up controversial subjects to get folks involved. There's no need for someone to bring up controversial subjects; I'm good at that. But, I actually have a subject that is, in my opinion, nice.

Mark

[BC]

Well welcome.

From the tone and content of your posts you feel RWD needs a court jester to hasten the pace around here?

[Turboguy]

I am glad you decided to jump on board.  I hang out a lot more here than anywhere else but I think I have seen your nick a few times on the other boards but I was not there enough or did not pay enough attention to get any real feel for you.   From what you have said in the two posts I have read here, I like the way you think and I am glad you have decided to be more involved here.

Has anyone from the other boards toned down, humm, if they have I am glad I missed it there.  Just kidding a bit.  They have some good thoughts and I often disagree with more the way they say it than with what they say.  I think everywhere something a little controversial tends to create a flurry of activity.   I have noticed that a lot of people who post here have been banned repeatidly at other boards.  Most of these guys have a lot of good things to say, and some not so good but I think someone has to be really off the wall to get banned here.

I do agree with you Dan does a great job.   I think as an online community designed to help AM looking or married to a FSU woman this site is tops.  Once again, I am glad you have jumped out of the shaddows.

[BillyB]

Mark, are you the 1wkwonder from Texas? I wanted to welcome you with a joke but nevermind since I wore it out already. Please don't bring a personal vendetta into your threads as was interpreted at RWG. Let's focus on the issues.

[TomT]

Well welcome.

From the tone and content of your posts you feel RWD needs a court jester to hasten the pace around here?

 

BC,

If RWG ever restores 1WkWonder's classic of insipience entitled, "Don't you guys not know nothing," you will have abundant confirmation of your first impression.

 

[BC]

Well hells bells... another word I had to look up on dictionary.com

but well worth the trouble!

Thanks Tom

[Maxx2]

 

"Don't you guys not know nothing,"
 

That had me puzzled until I translated it as, "Do not you guys not have any knowledge about nothing" OK I am still puzzled. The knowledge is about nothing. OK? as in understanding a void. Then the "not know" means "not understanding the knowledge of understanding the void" So the "Don't you guys" could mean "you guys may not know". So putting it all together it would be "You guys may not know about not understanding the knowledge of understanding the void." But I think it just means "Do you dummys understand anything?"

Maxx

[Markus]

Thanks for the replies. My first two posts were the first on this board, and my reply is the first with the new format. I haven't had a chance to explore the new look, but all the new buttons look fun.

The comment that tagged the title "Don't you guys not know nothing" to me is a literal fabrication from the poster. What more can I say about that except that I did post a double negative in the same sentence on a title.  I can't even access RWG to do a search. Perhaps the poster can that search and post the correct title instead of "making up" his own title.

As far as having a personal vendetta, I guess those thoughts would come from threads such as "Is It Smart For a 45 Year Old Man to Target a 20 Year Old FSUW." If one goes back and reads that thread, there is not any mention of names or specific people from me. Names were brought up by other people later in the thread, but not by me. People can interpret anything they wish, but don't apply it to me when it not was stated.

There are times when newbies need facts without beating them over the head. However, even after applying the "clue bat" from jb, some newbies won't listen to reason. But, there are ways to convey thoughts without beating people over the head with opinions. As is usual in some of my posts, I use sarcasm and rhetoric to make people think. But, sometimes people's thinking goes way out in left field in their responses.  

I can't post everyday, but I would like to offer my experiences to newbies if I feel I can contribute with posts that will help the individuals in their decisions with this process. I also care to counter strong opinions from "experienced" folks who care only about their opinions and not about what the newbie is experiencing.  So until then...

Mark

[Killer-B]

Mark-us from Tex-as.... Welcome -

As a fellow RWG convert - Not only have I read the aforementioned posts, but partook in some of the "banter" as well... I'd also agree that some other RWG'ers here have indeed "toned down" their rhetoric... Not always - but - that's one of the reasons I came over here (Besides Spence selling out and nuking the Mods - but that topic is being beaten to death in "anything goes") and I digress... Dan runs a semi-tight ship and we (RWG'ers) have all "watched" this board for some time... I also agree it has a slower pace... But is less vindictive... Which is also a welcome reprieve from the venom elsewhere (I was digressing wasn't I? LOL)

Anyway - Look forward to exchanging thoughts with you... and your posts/pix are usually insightful (But hey, no pressure!  )

Cheers,

Killer (aka ______) LOL

[KenC]

Well, that title is an "attention getter" for those that know me via posting. I guess this is my "Hey I joined this board" statement, and my name here reflects who I am and what I did.  But, since being short on words is not my weakness, I wish to add to that "attention getter."

Let me begin by admitting that I have been an observer on this board, knowing the history of some of the posters. I have followed how Dan has dealt with people who bring in subjects of other threads, these posters using something irrelevant that they learned to try and debate.  Usually, such people are taking personal shots at someone, admitting they don't have the capability of dealing with the current subject. Dan has provided rebukes to such posters and to posters who get totally off subject with degrading agendas. I like what Dan is doing.

What I dislike are the posts from people who don't have the intellectual ability to exchange ideas, so they revert to their emotional thinking. Let me just say that I have experienced the arrogant posts from people who found a wife and use their situation as a springboard to ridicule men who are beginning this process.  When reviewing a newbies thoughts, some things stand out as "You're doing the wrong thing" such as sending money. But, I have seen men use their "opinion" to say  degrading things to men. What I have noticed on this board, knowing some of those men are on this board, is that they have "toned down" what they say. Their arrogance has decreased. I wonder, have these men learned a lesson? I think they have.

I have noticed that there isn't that much activity here, which is why some folks from RWG have made an effort to bring up controversial subjects to get folks involved. There's no need for someone to bring up controversial subjects; I'm good at that. But, I actually have a subject that is, in my opinion, nice.

Mark

Oh thank you for enlightening us with your valuable (?) opinion of how we should or should not post here.  (Talk about arrogance) Silly me, I thought we were doing just fine without the likes of you.  Why don't you get off your damn soap box and quit lecturing us and post about something you know about?  Maybe like your relationship with your wife.  Some how you never seem to post about her.  Why is that?  And didn't the guys on RWG run you out on a rail?  Isn't that really why you're here?
KenC

[Killer-B]

LOL - Well, that didn't take long... I figured "someone" (cough) would jump in...

Whilst I don't have a Dog in this fight, knowing both ya'll, I wouldn't be casting too many stones Ken... But will let you 2 duke it out ... (preferably as gentlemen)

As someone up-thread kindly mentioned... Let's keep comments to the topic at hand... Am sure you all could start a whole new thread on who was on which rail when it was run out of town - 

Peace...

KB

[KenC]

Killer,
I don't know what your talking about.  I still occasionally post over there and was asked to be a mod more than a few times.
KenC

[Turboguy]

Sometimes as I listen to people talk I wonder how anyone is left over there.  It seemed to me like everyone has been banned for life a few times and those who weren't got fired as moderators in the change even if they were the best guys there.   You should have accepted Ken, then you could join the fired club since you weren't in the banned club.

[Son of Clyde]

You are "THE" infamous Mark from Texas who jumped all over me after I posted one of my many swan songs on RWG? Or are you the One Week Wonder I have spoken with on the telephone who is a very nice guy? I can only remember one guy posting as the One Week Wonder and I don't remember him being from Texas.

[Markus]

Clyde,

I spoke to you on the phone a while back.  As far as jumping all over you, I think you are referring to MarkInTX.

Mark

[Turboguy]

Darn, I wish I had someone with a handle close to mine.  That way I could blame him for all the bad things and take credit for all the good things, both his and mine.

[catzenmouse]

Darn, I wish I had someone with a handle close to mine.  That way I could blame him for all the bad things and take credit for all the good things, both his and mine.

TG,

 Create a new profile from your home computer called Tarboguy and with it you can be your evil twin and say all kinds of nasty things and be a total butthead. You can even get into arguments with Turboguy if you want to liven things up a bit...

Ken

[Jack]

Welcome One Week Wonder

First let me say for future reference in my humble opinion that I would not use the word smart and one week wonder in the same sentence.

I think some of the poster's here are having an identity aberration. I do not know much about TheOneWeekWonder, I do not know if he is married, I don't know if he met one lady and proposed in the first week and ended up getting married, just don't know.  I don't know if  TOWW is from Texas or not but I feel certain that TOWW is not the Boy Blunder from Texas.

OneWeekWonder as I mentioned "welcome to the RWD". For those of us who may have missed your experience, what you did, how you came up with the name One Week Wonder, would you please enlighten those of us you do not know, curious minds would like to know.

Are you married? When did you begin your pursuit for God's gift to man, Russian woman. How many trips, did you met one marry one, meet many ladies, still looking, etc.

[Son of Clyde]

Clyde,

I spoke to you on the phone a while back.¦nbsp; As far as jumping all over you, I think you are referring to MarkInTX.

Mark

I remember you and the fact that you supported me when MarkinTx went on a tirade after my post. You are the good guy I was referring to.

[jb]

    I do believe a "smart one-week-wonder" is an oxymoron.

[Markus]

Hello Jack,

I had asked a question on RWG and subsequently Kenc started a thread named "Is It Smart To Be A One Week Wonder." It was a very lengthy thread. I decided later to change my name to OWW. But Kenc originally coined the term.

Here's my history:

Sep 2003 - Began correspondence with my now wife
Jan 2004 - Visited for the first time and proposed on that trip
Mar 2004 - Visited again
Jul 2004  - Got married in Russia
Nov 2004 - Visited again
I made 3 more visits in 2005 and my wife came back with me in Nov 2005
I've been to the FSU 7 times and my wife and I will be returning to Russia for her 1st visit back and my 8th trip during Aug of this year.

Mark

[Bruce]

Oneweekwonder,

  Any particulars on her age and your age?  Where is she from and where are you from?  Are there any children involved?  How did you know she was the one and why did you marry in the FSU (Russia I assume)? 

[Jooky]

Some guy might down a twelve pack of beer, hop on a motorcycle without a helmet, and take it for a screaming ride down the freeway.

It might end up being an enjoyable ride, with nothing bad coming from it.

But it still ain't smart!

[ronin308]

I also started out as a one week wonder.  I proposed to a woman I didn't know very well at all.  I had met her that week and proposed and started the K-1 process the same week.  I felt that she and I had good chemistry (at least as good as it can be through a terp)

Probably the best thing that happened to us is the fact that we are going on 9 months while waiting for the K-1.  I have been back on average every 2 months and will be visiting her for the 6th time in June (with the hope that USCIS will have finally extracted head from rear orifice).

The "chemistry" we felt did lead to love, but I would say that I was not smart in proposing as early as I did.  Once I did this though I felt it was important to take advantage of the wait for the K-1 by returning as often as possible.  My job allows for time off when I want it and I can afford many trips back to visit.

We've also gone to where she could understand most of what I said to her to where today we discussed what was happing in Ukraine and the US economies and what was to blame.  We've also been able to discuss most of the intimate issues as they come up, not without emotions though.

The single most important thing for both of us is that we are patient enough when the "challenges" pop up as they will.  I can remember a time when she was crying because she felt she couldn't communicate something to me.  It took the next 1/2 hour with her dictionary and writing pad to finally get to the root of the issue and solve it.  If she had spoken my language it might have been resolved quicker, however since many women in the US wouldn't tell me the things she did in the first place it's possible I would have never have known what was bothering her until our relationship died.

While I started as a OWW I feel I moved away from that having now spent over 44 days with her one on one.  Twice the trips were to foreign countries which was great for me because I love to travel.  The other 2 were in her home town where I got to watch how she interacted with her family and a few friends.

I spent the time at the apartment she shared with her mother which was great as I was able to get the immersion course in Russian.  I also gained an understanding of what it is going to be like when she comes to the US.  I also understand why some people might have an understanding of the language but lack the confidence to speak it.  (I would constantly ask her about conversations we heard to clarify my understanding of Russian). 

I think if we had not had this time and I had been a typical 1 week wonder I would not be feeling the way I do now about our marriage.  After spending as much time as I have with her, plus averaging 4 hours a week on the phone I don't have any question in my mind about the marriage.  In my case we will not be using the K-1 as a trial period instead we will plan a 1st class wedding which will be cool.

[jb]

308,

Yes indeedie, you are a long way ahead of the typical "OWW", light years ahead IMHO.

I think the issue I'd have with the typical "OWW" scenario is that the second time he sees the woman he's going to marry is when she gets off the plane with the K-1 visa in her hand.  A la PhotoGuy Doug.  At that juncture she is virtually a complete stranger to him and they have 90 days to either fall in love or he ships her home.  If, as the topic originator stipulated, and as a matter of fact in the PhotoGuy/Larissa case, she also has little or no English when she steps off the plane, I think asking her to become proficient enough in English AND fall in love, all in less than 89 days is placing an unreasonable burden on the fiancee.

Perhaps it's just me, but I've never experienced love at first sight, although I've often experienced lust at first sight, it never turned into a lasting love.  I've dated many women in my life for greater than 90 days periods where I thought everything was just hunky, only for the two of us to discover 6 months into the dating relationship that we were not made to order for each other.

Using my own experience as a yardstick, that which builds my personal opinions.   I have to say, I think the man who rushes to marriage without the benefit of additional visits to the FSU woman's home town to meet family and friends, and to further get to know the lady, is playing with fire. Getting married under such circumstances is not, once again, IMHO, not wise.  The preacher at the altar may not be handing him a wife, but instead, a ticking time bomb with a delayed fuse set to go off in 6 months.

YMMV