MIL/FIL visits

[BC]

I dunno.. seems quite common in WM/FSUW relationships..

How do you hold up?.. or give up?

[GregfromGa]

I dunno.. seems quite common in WM/FSUW relationships..

How do you hold up?.. or give up?

Is this a trick question?  LOL

[BC]

Is this a trick question?  LOL

No, just that recently I've seen posts where extended MIL visits were mentioned - both in positive and negative light.

My personal experience, yes the visits were nice for a year or two 90 days at a time, then simply got to be  'too much', so much that I had to simply say a 'visit' from afar is a one or max two week 'thing'.

I really think the 'Three day rule' is probably the best.  Welcome them on the first day, enjoy the second together and on the third sincerely wish them well on their way home.

Much better than telling them what a relief it will be taking them to the airport the other 80 some odd days.

[GQBlues]

LOL. Holy smokes!!! Just now noticed this...

The majority of those who participated in the poll voted 'Never' or 'Rarely'. Is this indicative of the overall sentiment of relationships between in-laws, or just a cursory proof of western vs eastern cultural normalcy?

[southernX]

never had any problems with the inlaws

however they have never visited either
i would think 3-6 weeks would be fine personally , but  it will never happen

SX

[Gator]

In laws are great.  Even better have been the friends.  In the 18 months since wifey's arrival, we have had 8 man-months of Russian speaking visitors.   They are a lot of fun; however, I endeavor to stay out of the way.
 
Yet I will take them onto the golf course  (lots of giggles in a one-hole scramble) and hunt for gators and snakes (they just don't get into it). 

[Faux Pas]

LOL. Holy smokes!!! Just now noticed this...

The majority of those who participated in the poll voted 'Never' or 'Rarely'. Is this indicative of the overall sentiment of relationships between in-laws, or just a cursory proof of western vs eastern cultural normalcy?

I was a never. The MIL is elderly and while I think she is interested to travel and take a look, her health likely will never permit it. She does have a standing all expense paid invitation but, she has yet to take advantage of it. My MIL is an old Soviet Babushka of the old order. Not the stoop sitting, sunflower seed spitting sort but, a very classy, local social butterfly whose entire yearly life cycle revolves around her garden. Which is a schedule all of in itself encompasses 12 months

She says she want to visit but, the mere discussion makes her ill. Not because she doesn't want to but, because it takes her away from her garden, her garden preparations or preparations from the yearly garden padgent that truly is her highlight of the year.

I and the wife want her to visit but to date she has not. She has her schedule and I doubt that will ever change. As far as I am concerned, I would love to have her for as long or as short as she would stay but, I don't expect it will ever happen. She treats me like a God when I visit her and I would do the same if she were to visit us. I just don't see it happening

[GQBlues]

I haven't participated in the poll yet because I'm not sure where my sentiment actually belongs to.

I'm crazy about FIL. He's such a character! MIL and I had long since patched up some of our initial misgivings. While I really would like having them around, I still think at most my threshold is about a week to 10 days. I feel the same way with my own Mumski. So I don't believe my situation have anything to do emotionally.

I left 'home' when I was 17.5 and never really looked back. So the thought of having 'parents' living in my home for longer than the noted time above is just too much for me.

[Daveman]

I haven't participated in the poll yet because I'm not sure where my sentiment actually belongs to.

I'm crazy about FIL. He's such a character! MIL and I had long since patched up some of our initial misgivings. While I really would like having them around, I still think at most my threshold is about a week to 10 days. I feel the same way with my own Mumski. So I don't believe my situation have anything to do emotionally.

I left 'home' when I was 17.5 and never really looked back. So the thought of having 'parents' living in my home for longer than the noted time above is just too much for me.

I agree completely.  I can see assisting in getting them set up somewhere sort of close by, but then again, I have that reservation that they'll just show up every day if too close.  That's something that would drive me to strap on a special vest too.


Nah, once children have flown the coop, aside from some kind of medical/economic   emergency on a temporary basis, I just cannot fathom living under the same roof with parents. Of course, if MY parents were to show up here at this point I'm pretty certain we'd get the hell outta here let 'em have the house during the process of exorcism.

[southernX]

The majority of those who participated in the poll voted 'Never' or 'Rarely'. Is this indicative of the overall sentiment of relationships between in-laws, or just a cursory proof of western vs eastern cultural normalcy?

i voted never ,
reason is both our respective parents are now dead , no poll question that suits that one above , so although we both enjoyed our inlaws when alive , we never got to have them visit for extended periods

however if they had of survived for longer , then yes id comfortably  have had them stay with us for a month or so on a vacation , live with us more permanent  , nah , no way , same with our adult kids

my old man used to say you should never live within walking distance of your relatives, as familiarity does breed contempt
that has been a good rule of thumb so far 

SX

[ML]

my old man used to say you should never live within walking distance of your relatives, as familiarity does breed contempt
that has been a good rule of thumb so far 

Wouldn't this have to be tempered for  the actual, existing circumstance.

In Soviet Union times, and still existing in many families, you have 3 or more generations  living together . . . with no alternative . . . contempt breeding or not.