What about Prenuptial agreement??

[George_123]

I heard of guys getting divorce with RW so often. Do you think we should get a prenuptial agreement?? Why or why not?
Thanks

[Bruno]

I heard of guys getting divorce with RW so often. Do you think we should get a prenuptial agreement?? Why or why not?
Thanks

A 14 page topic on Pre-nups :

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=71.0

PS : You can use the search function from the forum... with almost 33000 post, it is a needed tool for find reply to your questions...

[Daknack]

Get one. Simple as that dont care if you only have 5 cents in your pocket.  Saves a world of grief

[PeeWee]

I heard of guys getting divorce with RW so often. Do you think we should get a prenuptial agreement?? Why or why not?
Thanks

I have a customer of mine who is a lawyer. The other day, as we were conducting business, I asked him about agreements. He said to deffinately get one. He is single but will get one if he ever gets married. You want one and there is no other option for you. Come divorce time you will be left in the street pennyless if you don't have a prenup.

Peewee

[BC]

This has been discussed to death.

Prenups are not an insurance policy for bad decisions. 

[PeeWee]

This has been discussed to death.

Prenups are not an insurance policy for bad decisions. 

I am 100% the other way on that BC. They will save your financial butt for you making a bad decsioion and sometimes good decisions go bad. That meaning the rosy marriage of 10 years that goes sour. Women will flat out financial rape you if you don't have a contract. Remember the contract of for her benefit too.

Peewee

[BC]

PeeWee,

Why is it that guys start asking questions about prenups when they are interested in RW?

Remember the majority have been divorced at least once.

Whatever law applies is the minimum that will apply to a prenup.. The only realistic scenario I would support for a prenup is to decide the venue should a divorce be necessary.

I would say that most of the men interested in prenups are interested for the wrong reasons.. period.

Heck a good portion of em really have nothing to loose anyway.  Trying to split debts?.. hahaha

JMHO

[Bruno]

I would say that most of the men interested in prenups are interested for the wrong reasons.. period.

From my past experience with russian women, the only reason that i can use a pre-nups is about child... I have take care of a wonderfull daughter from her 3.5 year until her 10 year... but now, i have no right since i am not the genetic father... a pre-nups can have allow visit right or maybe co-parental right...

A pre-nups is not always about money... it can be related to other family thing...

[jb]

BC,

Trying to be kinder and gentler here,,, George123 may be "Big Daddy Warbucks" with millions to protect from the clutches of a greedy RW.  If that's the case he might need to spend $5+K for a pre-nup that would hold up in court.  On the other hand, if he's an average guy with a few bucks in the bank, a house, a few cars, and a decent job, and has the good luck to live in a "Community Property" state, he doesn't probably need a pre-marriage contract, since everything he owned prior to the marriage is protected anyway.

He needs to explain why he thinks he should be getting a pre-nup before anyone should start advising him.

[BC]

jb,

Good point.. BigDaddyWarbucks would certainly not be asking here.

You are being gentile.. with 5k .. you're counting on the woman covering the cost of her lawyer and translator?

Remember folks it's not the cost of the prenup, you also have to consider the costs of eventually defending it.

[jb]

you also have to consider the costs of eventually defending it.

Excellent point, unless someone is intent on screwing his future wife in the event of divorce, (sounds almost like premeditation to me), it's not my cup o' tea.  If I didn't trust her I would not have married her.  But with the plethora, the super abundance, of OWWs we've seen lately I can understand their trepidation and need to CYA, because bad decision making can be expensive.

[PeeWee]

Something you guys are not thinking about. Prenup is also for understanding what happens to property in the event of death of either spouse, not limited to only divorce. I marry an RW, she has children, I have children, and then I die. What happens to property? What if her children argue or object about something? What protects my children? In other words who speaks on their behalf in the event of a dispute? The prenup does.

It is an insurance policy to be sure but everything we do in life is covered by a policy of some kind. You have workman's comp. plan, 401K, life insurance, and car insurance. So why not marriage insurance too?

Would any doctor practice medicine without having medical malpractice insurance? Why would any sane person who has everyother kind of insurance not want to cover their financial ass when he enter into a marriage, knowing full well that he has a 50% chance of making the marriage last, and if it does last then a 100% chance of the marriage ending in the death of one or the other partners. Why would you not have a written document in place to spell out what happens if?

Peewee

[Daknack]

In my case a prenup would save alot of very serious physical pain.  I have a disorder called crohns disease. To save you the research looking it up, its a digestive disorder in which your body feels your digestive system is a disease to be killed.  Typically if you have ever heard someone complain about pain from an ulcer flare up, imagne someone with a digestive system littered with ulcer after ulcer or one which is several feet long in your intestine (when they are usually the size of a dime or a quarter).  Now... somethings set off the pain of the disorder.  Being sick (which kicks in your immune system) certain types of food, and one of the biggest STRESS.  Now being married of course everyone has ups and downs, that "normal" stresses"  I mean more unique stress.  Examples could be getting fired from a job, or someone close dies, or in my case dealing with the prick lawyer my ex hired.  Every time I had dealings with this guy I would get so sick physically from the pain I often needed to lie down for a day or two to recover.  Even if the issue wasnt big, I wouldnt know it until I was already upset.  It was in all seriousness very much like physical torture to deal with this over the course of a year and a half, and have your ex pick fights over something as stupid as butter dishes.  There is NO WAY IN HELL, that I am going to suffer like that again and I dont give a damn who the woman is or where shes from there will be a prenup.  I dont care if we both have 5 cents to our name.  I tell you your going to save the $ just in lawyers fees fighting over stupid non-sense.  More and more people in the US are getting prenups and the overwhelming majority of them are getting married to AW.... not RW.  So to make it an issue of "Your only interested in a prenup because its is a RW" is a load of crap in alot of cases (although I admit certainly not all).  Everyone needs a prenup.  It saves time, confusion, and it decreases motivation for a divorce from either party looking for a quick pay out.  Its a hell of alot more fair than fighting afterwards because you actually LIKE each other while your doing it.  If so many marriages were not breaking (divorce), men and women wouldnt need the broom (prenup) to sweep up the pieces.

[PeeWee]

Yep, what a prenup does is it sets up a series of what ifs and agreed divisions of assests when everyone is thinking rationally. The agreement is then put away in hopes of never being seen again. Later, if needed, the ration agreement resufaces and everyone has agreed to it and all is fine and everyone goes their seperate ways. If you do not have the rational agreement then what you end up dealing with is a ball busting lawyer plotting with a ball busting man hating woman who together try to bust your balls too. It is all based on emotion and hate. No way can you win and if you had but $5.00 going into it they will take your $5.00 and then you will go into debt or bankruptcy in order to pay off what is owed to everyone.

A prenup is a happy thing. Her lawyer meet with your lawyer. Discussions are had and deals are made. Everyone agrees and that is the way it is, forever.

Peewee

[jb]

PeeWee, you just about deserve to put on the "ignore" list for that idiotic summation.  That is not the purpose of a pre-nup and you know better than that.

[BillyB]

Some men say pre-nups are a joke for men who don't trust their woman. I guess those men can guarantee their woman's fidelity besides their own. Also people change over the years. Some get better, some get worse.

Some women are turned off by the thought of signing a pre-nup. They either don't know what a pre-nup is about or they have a nutcase for a man or they want an easy piece of the pie that was hard earned by her fiance.

With a pre-nup, you know what you're getting going into the marriage and you know what you're getting if you want to leave the marriage. With money issues aside, the two people can focus on marrying for love. Penalties can rack up with each case of infidelity according to some of those Hollywood pre-nups.

[PeeWee]

PeeWee, you just about deserve to put on the "ignore" list for that idiotic summation.  That is not the purpose of a pre-nup and you know better than that.

Then I guess one lawyer wasted his good hard earned money when he went to law school then because that is how he explained it to me. As far as you go I'd rather take the advice of a professional rather than a layman (you) any given day. You know absolutlely nothing about the subject, hence your opinion is not relevent to my summation.


Peewee

[PeeWee]

Some men say pre-nups are a joke for men who don't trust their woman. I guess those men can guarantee their woman's fidelity besides their own. Also people change over the years. Some get better, some get worse.

Some women are turned off by the thought of signing a pre-nup. They either don't know what a pre-nup is about or they have a nutcase for a man or they want an easy piece of the pie that was hard earned by her fiance.

With a pre-nup, you know what you're getting going into the marriage and you know what you're getting if you want to leave the marriage. With money issues aside, the two people can focus on marrying for love. Penalties can rack up with each case of infidelity according to some of those Hollywood pre-nups.

Another I can agree with. Those women who are turned off by the thought of signing the agreement are mostly likely the ones with a hidden agenda anyway. If you play the odds any marriage will not last at the rate of 50% or better. What is California now? 60% divorce rate? Why would any sane person want to insure against their demise by not insisting on an agreement?

Peewee

[Maxx2]

After experiencing a divorce with a Russian woman I can say that getting a pre-nup is not something that should assure one that the ending of such a marriage will be easy. There are other issues that can hurt just as much as who gets what. On the other hand losing a great deal of one's assets can prevent one from moving on with his life especially with another (Russian?  ) woman. After being in one of these marriages anyone I can tell you that you need to be well financed or there will be no joy.

So a pre-nup might be good at protecting your house and business but at the expence that your wife may not feel that either are hers or work to support either. Will the marriage become like "This is mine and that is yours" ?

Maxx

[PeeWee]

After experiencing a divorce with a Russian woman I can say that getting a pre-nup is not something that should assure one that the ending of such a marriage will be easy. There are other issues that can hurt just as much as who gets what. On the other hand losing a great deal of one's assets can prevent one from moving on with his life especially with another (Russian?  ) woman. After being in one of these marriages anyone I can tell you that you need to be well financed or there will be no joy.

So a pre-nup might be good at protecting your house and business but at the expence that your wife may not feel that either are hers or work to support either. Will the marriage become like "This is mine and that is yours" ?

Maxx

You make a very good point, Maxx. This appears to be one of the proverbial damned if you do damned if you don't paradoxes. Somewhat simple is the community property States. Before the marriage is yours, after the marriage is ours. I live in a comminity property State. And I'm still being advised to get one.

Peewee

[BillyB]

Maxx, a good pre-nup doesn't have only "This, this and this is MINE!!!" language. It can guarantee the woman getting some things based on her contributing to the marriage for many years without any infidelity so that she may move on with her life without missing a beat financially. Tell your woman that even if things don't work out, that you both don't need to fight in the end and guarantee her some things for her future welfare so you both can seperate without hard feelings. A smart woman knows half the marriages end in ugly divorce anyway. If you're a sensible and reasonable man and you know how to talk about pre-nups, putting a smile on your woman's face is possible. Some women can't be pleased regardless and would put up a hissy fit. Hopefully you're marrying a mature woman and hopefully you're a mature man when drafting the language to a pre-nup.

I have no problems signing a pre-nup if a woman has tons of money, property or heirlooms she wants to protect. I realize a woman could attained things in her life before me and those things aren't mine and I don't care attain those things through marriage. Some people isn't logical, they're whacked.

PeeWee, I live in WA too. Even in this community property State, A Pastor told me pre-nups are a smart thing to do. Obviously he must've seen lots of divorces with lots of bad results. Most divorces are never easy.

[PeeWee]

Maxx, a good pre-nup doesn't have only "This, this and this is MINE!!!" language. It can guarantee the woman getting some things based on her contributing to the marriage for many years without any infidelity so that she may move on with her life without missing a beat financially. Tell your woman that even if things don't work out, that you both don't need to fight in the end and guarantee her some things for her future welfare so you both can seperate without hard feelings. A smart woman knows half the marriages end in ugly divorce anyway. If you're a sensible and reasonable man and you know how to talk about pre-nups, putting a smile on your woman's face is possible. Some women can't be pleased regardless and would put up a hissy fit. Hopefully you're marrying a mature woman and hopefully you're a mature man when drafting the language to a pre-nup.

I have no problems signing a pre-nup if a woman has tons of money, property or heirlooms she wants to protect. I realize a woman could attained things in her life before me and those things aren't mine and I don't care attain those things through marriage. Some people isn't logical, they're whacked.

PeeWee, I live in WA too. Even in this community property State, A Pastor told me pre-nups are a smart thing to do. Obviously he must've seen lots of divorces with lots of bad results. Most divorces are never easy.

'

It appears that more of us are for them than against them. Like I said it is much easier to  have made a plan for a division of property when minds and hearts are light and emtions are positive rather than trying to accomplish the same thing when hearts have turned cold and emotions are at the stress level.

Peewee

[Bruno]

PeeWee, you just about deserve to put on the "ignore" list for that idiotic summation.

Number two !!! At these speed, when i will be back from my trip in 3 week, JB will "ignore" everybody and see only his own post 

[PeeWee]

Number two !!! At these speed, when i will be back from my trip in 3 week, JB will "ignore" everybody and see only his own post 

One never knows, Bruno, he may very well end up putting himself on ignore. I have yet to think to put anyone on ignore. I just ignore them in my mind for a while and then I forget about it and go back to reading everyone's opinion.

Peewee

[Bruno]

...I have yet to think to put anyone on ignore. I just ignore them in my mind for a while and then I forget about it and go back to reading everyone's opinion.

I will never ignore someone, specialy these i don't agree... Ignore them is the perfect way for them to post what they will without counterside... Not really a plus for a forum who is about discussion... If someone don't wish that people go again own opinion, they don't need post in a forum, they can start a blog ( new option thank to Dan ) who is more personal...