Thoughts on Southern Ukraine

[OmegaSupreme]

Hey all.

It's been a while since I've been around these parts, but after talking with another member who also hasn't been around here for a while, I thought I'd share some of my experiences here in Ukraine. I've been living in Ukraine for almost a year now, so some of this stuff is old news, but I thought I'd go ahead and share a few posts from a blog that I keep (no, I won't tell you which, it's a secret!).


****

The Arrival

Arriving in Ukraine was a bit of a surreal experience. I spent a total of around 24 hours traveling, if you include the time spent on layovers. Actually, it would be more if you count the marshrutka ride from Odessa to my destination city.

I flew a 5 hour flight from a city in the western half of the US to New York City, and slept the entire flight. Something like this is rare, as I always have difficulty with sleeping on planes. I think I nodded off shortly after take-off, and woke up around the time the plane was touching down in New York. I certainly didn't mind sleeping on that flight, but given a choice, I would've picked the next flight.

The flight from New York to Moscow was by far the longest amount of time I've ever spent on an airplane, and probably also one of the worst. The flight was on Russia's state-owned national airline, Aeroflot, as they had the cheapest tickets. I can't say the problem was so much the aircraft, which was an Airbus A330, but damn, the seats were very cramped. Or at least the one I sat in was. My knees were pressed firmly into the back of the seat in front of me for the entire flight, and I was unable to sleep a wink. The service by the steward, a burly Russian man with minimal English skills who apparently forgot how to smile sometime prior to the fall of the Soviet Union, didn't so much ask for your order as much as demand it. I will say this, though, they kept the food and drinks coming pretty much non-stop, and didn't charge for any of it. I'll take that over a smiling overweight stewardess asking you to show the money just to get some water any day.

Despite the discomfort of my seat, the flight went smoothly, and was made all that much more so by a large video display that showed the progress of the aircraft. That was a nice feature that I'd love to see on more airlines. After 9 hours, the plane touched down in Moscow, and I was able to stretch my legs and amuse the customs agents with my horrible Russian while waiting for the connecting flight to Odessa.

Arriving in Odessa was oddly similar to how I imagined it was like flying to the Soviet Union back in the day. The trip to Odessa went smoothly, and my seat was much more comfortable. However, by the time we touched down, I was having trouble staying awake. As soon as the plane stopped, we promptly disembarked from the plane and herded towards a waiting bus, which was to take us to the terminal. After an uncomfortably long wait on the bus, we were driven to the customs building and then herded into neat, orderly lines. All of the passengers were deathly quiet, leading to an ominous feeling that was added to by the grimaces of the customs agents.

When my turn finally came, the short but very cute girl behind the desk wordlessly took my passport and immigration card, and spent about 5 minutes doing something that I couldn't discern. Then, strangely, with what appeared to be a smile and a subtle wink, she handed both back to me, and in English welcomed me to Ukraine.


***

"Vy govorite po-angliyskiy?"

Navigating through Ukraine is not easy when one has a weak grasp of Russian. I thought my knowledge of Russian was good enough to get me by here until I actually arrived. I found this out shortly after arriving in my destination city. I took a marshrutka from Odessa, a trip of around 2.5 hours, and was absolutely exhausted by the time I got off. To be honest, I'm not even sure exactly where I had ended up. The only thing I knew was that I was somewhere within the city, but at 9pm at night, it's hard to get one's bearings when one has been without sleep for almost a full 24 hours.

Standing on a dark street corner with a full suitcase and luggage and not able to figure out where the hell you are is a bit of a frightening experience. All I saw around me were sidewalk kiosks that were closed for the night, and groups of guys outfitted in the latest Russian street thug fashion (track suits, beanies, and pointy-tipped dress shoes) roaming around. Thankfully, a middle aged woman was kind enough to humor my poor attempt at speaking Russian, and was able to understand enough of it to walk me to the next street over to find a marshrutka heading to where I needed to be.

For those who have never been on a Ukrainian marshrutka before, let me say that your first time is an experience you'll never forget, and not in a good way. Regardless of how long your stay on the marshrutka will be, you will most likely experience at least 3 near accidents while the driver tests the limits of the brakes. You will experience all of this while either sitting in an extremely cramped seat meant for someone half your size (if you're lucky), or standing in the aisle, holding onto the hand bar for dear life while your feet slip out from under you every 30 seconds.

Once my second harrowing experience on a marshrutka ended, I found myself on the main central street of the city, looking for the office of the school that was to be my new employer. Again, wandering around on a dark street asking everyone "Vy govorite po-angliyskiy?" ("Do you speak English?" in Russian) isn't for the faint-of-heart. A good samaritan, armed with a rudimentary grasp of English and a map program on his smartphone, helped me find the office, only to find out it was closed. Ok, no problem. I then wandered the streets (still carrying my backpack and suitcase, of course) until another good samaritan helped me find the closest "gostinitsa" (hotel). Well, at least I thought he was a good samaritan until he asked me for money afterwards. The slurred speech and strong smell of alcohol should have tipped me off, but thankfully, he was happy with the 3 gryvna I gave him. I then checked in for the night, showered, let everyone back home know I was safe and sound, and then slipped into an exhaustion-induced coma.

***

Sticking Out

It doesn't take long to figure out which people you encounter are locals and which ones aren't. Ukrainians have a pretty distinctive way of dressing, and their standing in society is easily reflected by how they do so. The lower class men tend to dress in "gopnik" gear, which I had detailed before. Track suits and pointy-tipped dress shoes are all the rage with them. The higher class people tend to like to show off that fact, by walking around with headless phone pieces and dressed in a sports coat. I'd tell you how the middle class dresses, but honestly, there's not much of a middle class here.

The women, on the other hand, all dress the same. In winter weather, they're sporting fur-lined winter coats, and high heels. In fact, it's ALL high heels. I don't think any self-respecting Ukrainian woman would be caught dead wearing any other type of footwear.

Foreigners, though, stick out like a sore thumb. There's really no shortage of foreign men to be encountered in this town. This city is one of the capitals for the online marriage agency business, so naturally this place tends to get a lot of foreign men looking for either love, sex, or some combination of both. And it only takes a second to figure out who isn't from here. For one, if they're not as sharply dressed as the locals, they're also not wearing a track suit. They also tend to walk around looking completely lost, speaking loudly in English (or another language), and almost all of them are north of 40.

I can't say I've fully integrated, although I've been learning the lay of the land a bit better. But I'm sure I still stick out like a sore thumb here.

****

That's all for now. I may post a few more things later on, if everyone wants.

[Anotherkiwi]

Nice start, but why not just say that you're in Nikolaev or Kherson?  It is hardly a state secret, surely! 

[jone]

Well, his profile says Mykolaiv (Nickolaev for you Russki speakers).

Am just wondering if this is his school?

[OmegaSupreme]

Dixie BBQ marked the halfway point of the two different schools I worked at. I'm no longer in Nikolaev. I may post a little more later, if anyone is interested.

[jone]

I have to laugh at a guy who hides his face, but posts it anyway on his Avatar.  It is like trying to say:  "Here I am, but I'm hiding!"

For those who don't know, Dixie BBQ is one of the local brothels in Mykolaiv.  It is right next to the McDonalds.  While I have never been to this fine establishment, I can say that it was pointed out to me by many of the locals.

[OmegaSupreme]

I'm not sure what you mean by that. I value the little bit of anonymity that I'm granted while participating on the internet. Those who know me (including some from this forum) know what I look like.

[jone]

Oh, I don't know?  Perhaps the hardhat to cover your hair?  Perhaps the goggles to distort your eyes?  Could even be the mask covering your nose and mouth? 

Hell, if you want to hide, just choose another avatar.  But this one looks silly.  My opinion.  I have friends who hide all of their features, but then, if I looked like they do, I might consider doing so as well.  Hah!  Not that I'm a handsome guy, either.

There were a lot of games being played with English lessons about a year ago, and a teaching staff in Mykolaiv.   When I lived there this summer, I heard my fair share of the stories.   I was simply wondering why someone would put their face up on the forum and then try to hide the features.

By all means, ignore me and proceed with your tale!

[OmegaSupreme]

I'm not sure why you feel the need to insult my choice of avatar. It's a photo I put up as a joke for some other members I met in chat when I first joined this site 4 years ago. I wanted to come here and contribute some information based on my experiences here. If you have a problem with my avatar, then, sucks to be you. Anyways, my apologies for trying to contribute to this forum.

[jone]

Yeah, it does suck to be me.   

Stop it with the thin skin.   Tell your tale!  We're all waiting.  Who said you had to apologize?  If you can't see the humor in what I was pointing out, and have the ability to laugh at yourself (as I certainly do) then you are going to have problems on more than just this forum.

Put your feet on the table.  Enjoy life.  Laugh a little.  I was teasing you when I threw the picture of the local whorehouse up on the forum.  Instead of laughing at it, you reacted by stating that it was equal distant from both of the schools you taught at.  But then shrouded your present location in mystery.  But then you didn't even acknowledge you were ever in Mykolaiv until it was pointed out by one of the other members.  (You DO know that it says Mykolaiv on your profile?)

We are all here for entertainment.  Hopefully that's why you're here too.

[OmegaSupreme]

With your patronizing tone and admission of less than stellar genetics, trust me when I say that I wouldn't ever choose to swap lives with you. Continue with it if you want, it doesn't bother me. I'm having too much fun here in Ukraine to worry about what some keyboard warrior thinks about my avatar. I kept my location private in my blog posts, but obviously didn't worry about disclosing my location here on the forum. The fact that I didn't update my old blog post cut'n'pastes with my location was just oversight on my part, not any intention to remain "mysterious". As far as Dixie BBQ goes, I never stepped foot in the place, so I had nothing to comment on other than the fact that it was almost literally half-way between the two different schools I worked at in Nikolaev. You're simply reading more into my posts than what was put there.

[jone]

OMG.  You really take yourself too seriously.  And with your avatar, that is just TOOO funny.

Please.  Switch lives with me.  My life here is TERRIBLE.  I am a keyboard warrior.  I have no life but that which I post on this here forum.   

Enjoy.

[cc3]

With your patronizing tone and admission of less than stellar genetics, trust me when I say that I wouldn't ever choose to swap lives with you. Continue with it if you want, it doesn't bother me. I'm having too much fun here in Ukraine to worry about what some keyboard warrior thinks about my avatar. I kept my location private in my blog posts, but obviously didn't worry about disclosing my location here on the forum. The fact that I didn't update my old blog post cut'n'pastes with my location was just oversight on my part, not any intention to remain "mysterious". As far as Dixie BBQ goes, I never stepped foot in the place, so I had nothing to comment on other than the fact that it was almost literally half-way between the two different schools I worked at in Nikolaev. You're simply reading more into my posts than what was put there.

Hey Omega, jone is one of the most even-tempered, patient, and experienced contributors to this forum. Be more tolerant and accepting! Hang around and learn who the participants are. There are some whom you will find far more objectionable!

[tfcrew]

 
Now I remember.
OS traded keys w/Amerkanski a few years ago.
OS was in Las Vegas...Amerk was in Volgograd.

[JayH]

OMG.  You really take yourself too seriously.  And with your avatar, that is just TOOO funny.

Please.  Switch lives with me.  My life here is TERRIBLE.  I am a keyboard warrior.  I have no life but that which I post on this here forum.   

Enjoy.

Will you get a life  guy!! Stop with the terrorising of the OP here!!

To the OP --OS -- a few observations-- some others on forum have been in Ukraine- some even to Nikolaev-- some to near enough every city in that area!  Which btw-- it is more central than southern--Crimea is south Ukraine. Kiev & Sevastopol are approx equidistant  to Nikolaev .
The reason it is of interest exactly what your location is that there are local issues that people on the forum are familiar with-- so it is relevant to know!! 

[jone]

Will you get a life  guy!! Stop with the terrorising of the OP here!!

To the OP --OS -- a few observations-- some others on forum have been in Ukraine- some even to Nikolaev-- some to near enough every city in that area!  Which btw-- it is more central than southern--Crimea is south Ukraine. Kiev & Sevastopol are approx equidistant  to Nikolaev .
The reason it is of interest exactly what your location is that there are local issues that people on the forum are familiar with-- so it is relevant to know!! 

You LOSER!  Can't you see, I'm busy here!

(To the OP .... just 'cause Jay acts like he's been to Mykolaiv, you need to get proof from him before you believe him.)

(Chuckle.) 

Mr. OP, if you get to know us, you will see that we really do get together to have a good laugh.  Take teasing for what it is worth.  An effort to evoke a response and draw you out a little bit.  I have no dog in this hunt.  Since you cannot take me for the teaser I am, I will gracefully bow out.  But not before I have one more shot at Jay:  Double loser!

[Ade]

I thought I'd share some of my experiences here in Ukraine. I've been living in Ukraine for almost a year now, so some of this stuff is old news, but I thought I'd go ahead and share a few posts from a blog that I keep (no, I won't tell you which, it's a secret!).

You mean this one? http://eccentricxpat.blogspot.no/?m=1

[jone]

I read that blog.  I ain't a gonna touch it.   

[JayH]

That would be where?  Lugansk? 

So-not "southern"  nor even central  regardless of how it is described-- but eastern?

[lonedrake]

but I thought I'd go ahead and share a few posts from a blog that I keep

 You left out all of the "mind blowing sex" blog posts

 You know.....jone had me confused why he was being such a "hilarious" ass......but I guess he has his own reasons and they are not from this thread.

 Why not just own up to the blog in the first place? If you are embarrassed by it....why not just delete it? 

[LiveFromUkraine]

Hey Omega, jone is one of the most even-tempered, patient, and experienced contributors to this forum. Be more tolerant and accepting! Hang around and learn who the participants are. There are some whom you will find far more objectionable!

If by even-tempered you mean passive aggressive than I agree.

[LiveFromUkraine]

With your patronizing tone and admission of less than stellar genetics, trust me when I say that I wouldn't ever choose to swap lives with you. Continue with it if you want, it doesn't bother me. I'm having too much fun here in Ukraine to worry about what some keyboard warrior thinks about my avatar. I kept my location private in my blog posts, but obviously didn't worry about disclosing my location here on the forum. The fact that I didn't update my old blog post cut'n'pastes with my location was just oversight on my part, not any intention to remain "mysterious". As far as Dixie BBQ goes, I never stepped foot in the place, so I had nothing to comment on other than the fact that it was almost literally half-way between the two different schools I worked at in Nikolaev. You're simply reading more into my posts than what was put there.

Some guys on here are socially retarded.  Don't mind them.  They are their own worst nightmares, obviously.

[OmegaSupreme]

I really don't care too much about outing my own blog, otherwise I wouldn't have posted from it. I'm more than aware that plugging in a sentence or two from it in a search engine would lead the curious to it. No big deal.


Obviously, I left out the racier parts of the blog, as I didn't think they would apply to this forum, or even be appropriate, for that matter. What I wanted to post here were the more level-headed parts of it, as I thought some here might find them of value.


BTW, tfcrew, you have a good memory. I talked alot to Amerkanski in chat all those years ago. I take it he hasn't been back here since then?

[Gator]

As far as Dixie BBQ goes, I never stepped foot in the place....

Too bad, because I wanted to know if their BBQ recipe was Texas-style or more like the styles of Alabama and Carolina.

[Jumper]

Too bad, because I wanted to know if their BBQ recipe was Texas-style or more like the styles of Alabama and Carolina.

hmm, I never went there, but walked by it  a few times..
being naive, I thought it was a cafe..
one i had heard  known for expat patrons, but nothing more.

 

[LAman]

I really don't care too much about outing my own blog, otherwise I wouldn't have posted from it. I'm more than aware that plugging in a sentence or two from it in a search engine would lead the curious to it. No big deal.


Obviously, I left out the racier parts of the blog, as I didn't think they would apply to this forum, or even be appropriate, for that matter. What I wanted to post here were the more level-headed parts of it, as I thought some here might find them of value.

I do enjoy reading stories of guys experiences in their travels to Ukraine, thanks for that!!! But I cannot fully agree that your 'arrangements' to get from Odessa to *****City can be labeled as 'level headed', I find it to be irrational and dangerous. A foreign country, at night, on cheap buses, reeking of a foreigner, unfamiliar with area, hopeful on locals to get around, speak poorly local language, thugs hanging about....... It could have quickly turned into a mess. Reminds me of Calmissle's trip report!!! I am glad things turned ok for you. Good luck with your new job and travels!!! Keep us informed of life in Ukraine!!!