Hello, I am Nina from Russia

[NinaG]

Hello everybody. My name is Nina. I am 26 yo. I live in St. Petersburg, Russia. I'm finding for two years. Thanks to search, I began to learn English. For me it's a big plus. But for me the big disadvantage is that I do not understand a lot in international dating. I found this forum here and decided to find out how men are looking for Russian wives. And I'm surprised. Some themes easily support the desire of men to meet with two or more girls. It's a shame. We girls are talking with many men. But when there is a planning meeting, socializing with other men almost stops. I promised to come to the two men. Both broke his leg before the trip. Coincidence? I'll be glad to talk with you about finding. Perhaps here I see my mistakes in the search for and finally find my beloved man.
Thanks.

[jone]

NinaG,

Welcome to our forum.  Your input is valuable as you can describe your experiences with men who are searching.

Only five percent of men who are present on the internet actually make the trip to Russia or other FSU countries.  Making a connection with a man and having that connection result in a meeting and, then, actually in a relationship or marriage is a low percentage.

Should you stay on this forum, you will learn much about men seeking women.  Perhaps you will even find your man among our ranks. 

Thank you for writing and welcome.

[JayH]

Nina -- welcome. I am sure many will be interested in what you have to say !

 

[NinaG]

Thanks..
Listen to the man. First of all dating sites written advice is to make a good picture. And men are often asked to photos and more. I have a question. Men make the collection? I'm an ordinary girl. I have a few extra pounds and I do not often make new photos. I suggest going on Skype, because I have a webcam. Many men say compliments and very lively talk. And then disappear. Why can not immediately say that the conversation is not on Inters?
Second .. I am surprised by men who are not willing to travel to Russia. Yesterday I received a letter in which the man with whom we are talking about 3 months, proposed a meeting. All is fine, but the meeting appointed for Christmas! I am shocked.
Just surprises me a lot of "grandfathers" who are looking 20 years younger than they are. Many men do not understand how you can earn $ 200 a month and do not want to get a tourist visa to America.

All my search it - find a man from 27 to 37 years. Those who are willing to come to Russia, is ready for a serious relationship. Who are willing to understand my, as yet, bad English. I understand that money is made difficult. But I do not understand how in such a prosperous country like America need to save more than 6 months for a trip to Russia. Especially now a very good exchange rate for those who have dollars)))
Still would like to add. Men are afraid of scammers. I understand. But when a man can not send a bouquet of flowers in 3 months .. This I do not understand. Girls love romance.

[Anotherkiwi]

First,  Nina!

...First of all dating sites written advice is to make a good picture....I'm an ordinary girl. I have a few extra pounds and I do not often make new photos

Good photos are very important.  Although good men will try to find what is beneath the surface, and do not judge everybody simply by how they look, I think that most people want to present themselves in the best possible way.  If that means making new photos, then do it.  If you or a friend has a good digital camera, or a phone with a good camera, it won't cost anything.

I suggest going on Skype, because I have a webcam. Many men say compliments and very lively talk. And then disappear. Why can not immediately say that the conversation is not on Inters?

I think this is simply because many men are not willing to tell a lady face to face that they are not interested.  They think they are polite by only telling her in an email or phone call.

Second .. I am surprised by men who are not willing to travel to Russia. Yesterday I received a letter in which the man with whom we are talking about 3 months, proposed a meeting. All is fine, but the meeting appointed for Christmas! I am shocked.

The man who wrote to you is obviously not a member of this forum!  Everybody here says that men should be ready to travel within three months of starting to write to someone, if they feel there is mutual interest.  It has also been suggested that men should make their travel bookings BEFORE they start looking for someone on the internet - that way they can tell ladies that, for example, they will arrive in St Petersburg on 15th April.

Just surprises me a lot of "grandfathers" who are looking 20 years younger than they are. Many men do not understand how you can earn $ 200 a month and do not want to get a tourist visa to America.

Unfortunately there are many websites, such as AnastasiaDate, which promote the idea that there are thousands of beautiful Russian and Ukrainian women ready to leave their homes for any man of any age.  What is worse is that many men believe this nonsense, and start corresponding with what they believe are sincere young women, only to find that they have been writing to "Hairy Boris," the Employee of the Month.

All my search it - find a man from 27 to 37 years. Those who are willing to come to Russia, is ready for a serious relationship. Who are willing to understand my, as yet, bad English. I understand that money is made difficult. But I do not understand how in such a prosperous country like America need to save more than 6 months for a trip to Russia. Especially now a very good exchange rate for those who have dollars)))

I wish you good luck in your search.

Still would like to add. Men are afraid of scammers. I understand. But when a man can not send a bouquet of flowers in 3 months .. This I do not understand. Girls love romance.

I agree - but did you know that most websites offering flowers charge more for one bouquet than you earn in a month?  I have only sent flowers through the internet once, which cost me over $US 200.  In both Russia and Ukraine I found flower shops and kiosks where I could almost have all their flowers for that price!  On my first trip I visited my lady friend in her own city, and she could keep flowers at home, so I bought her a huge bouquet of roses one day while we were out walking.  The quality of these flowers was so good that they were still alive two weeks later when I returned to New Zealand.

[NinaG]

I agree - but did you know that most websites offering flowers charge more for one bouquet than you earn in a month?  I have only sent flowers through the internet once, which cost me over $US 200.  In both Russia and Ukraine I found flower shops and kiosks where I could almost have all their flowers for that price!  On my first trip I visited my lady friend in her own city, and she could keep flowers at home, so I bought her a huge bouquet of roses one day while we were out walking.  The quality of these flowers was so good that they were still alive two weeks later when I returned to New Zealand.

I know. I get paid adapted (small course) for Russia. I think men get more than $ 200 a month. I do not insist on a bouquet of flowers to the first meeting. For Russian girls are very important to see evidence of serious intent. I still have not seen such.
By the way some time ago, I seriously thought of finding a husband among farmers. I love to garden and design. For me it is the welfare of a large house, dog, garden. Of course the beloved husband. But here's the strange thing .. farmers are not in a hurry to Russia for their weird that a girl 26 years old wants to live a rural life.

[NinaG]

Men, I have a question for you. How can I understand the seriousness of a man or not? What are the signs that a man came to a dating site to find love and his wife?

[jone]

Nina,

You have asked many questions.  I will take on the most general of the questions you asked, but one which does not have an easy or favorable answer.

You want a man under forty years of age.  Your age range specified between 27 and 37 years.  I tell you honestly that most of the men looking on the typical Russian websites are not in that age range.  Most of the men looking in the FSU are in their second relationship.  (Or third or fourth!) 

Looking to the FSU is a fallback for many men who do not qualify or cannot find a woman in their home country.  Their idea is that they can get a better woman in Russia than they could at home.  It doesn't work the other way around.  If a Russian woman does not find a man in her country, she does not have the allure, simply because she is from Russia, to attract a man from the West.  Typically she is prettier and younger than the women he would be matched with in his home country.

So how do you find a man in your age range that perhaps wants to marry a Russian woman and is interested in farming?  I have a suggestion.  You should keep working on your English skills, which are quite good.  Then you should register yourself on a website called:  www.farmersonly.com

This is a website for online dating for men who typically live a farmer's life and are looking for a wife that is also interested in a farmer's life.  These men have not thought to look in Russia.  And you will have to convince them that you are serious.  But I believe you might find a good match there.

The added benefit of such a man is that he is not, typically, going to be scared of you as a scammer. 

Udachi.

[AC]

Men, I have a question for you. How can I understand the seriousness of a man or not? What are the signs that a man came to a dating site to find love and his wife?

NinaG,  to this site.  Not sure if you can tell this until you meet in person.  If he is serious he should be making plans to meet you in person within one month, maybe two months maximum of initial contact with you, in my opinion.

[Hammer2722]

Welcome to the forum NinaG. I recommend you read many of the posts here about relationships and even some of the trip reports. I think you will get some good information about the minds of some Western men. Don't give up your search and much good luck.

[Anathema]

Welcome Nina and good luck with your search!

 

[vwrw]

I have a few extra pounds

Welcome NinaG. That is very unusual for a FSW who is living in Russia to measure her weight in pounds. 

[ML]

And I'm surprised. Some themes easily support the desire of men to meet with two or more girls. It's a shame. We girls are talking with many men. But when there is a planning meeting, socializing with other men almost stops.

If you use a little logic here Nina, you could easily see the true situation.

The girl talks to several men; when she plans to meet with a particular man, socializing with other men 'ALMOST' stops.

You and he have a brief meeting and find you have no compatibility.  You stop seeing him after first date.

The man has spent thousands  of dollars to come to you.  And he has used up all his yearly vacation time.

He is devastated.

Meanwhile you have invested nothing and lost nothing. 

You meet with your girlfriends and laugh about how a silly man came so far to meet you; and you resume your socializing with other men.

[NinaG]

Welcome NinaG. That is very unusual for a FSW who is living in Russia to measure her weight in pounds. 

It's easy. I'm too lazy to write the word kilogram))

[NinaG]

You want a man under forty years of age.  Your age range specified between 27 and 37 years.  I tell you honestly that most of the men looking on the typical Russian websites are not in that age range.  Most of the men looking in the FSU are in their second relationship.  (Or third or fourth!)

So how do you find a man in your age range that perhaps wants to marry a Russian woman and is interested in farming?  I have a suggestion.  You should keep working on your English skills, which are quite good.  Then you should register yourself on a website called:  www.farmersonly.com

This site is down for those who are from Russia. And for all with the Russian ip match.сom closed. I know there are many themed dating sites (Christians, single parents, Mormons, fishermen, farmers, high, low). I checked many of them. In Russia, it does not work.  scammers...

About age. Have you seen on TLC show "Visa bride"? All the men there to 30 and only one who married a Russian, 31 years old.

[jone]

Hopefully, one of our brilliant members who know computer networks better than I can give you a back door entry into the dating sites of the United States.  Anyone care to give it a try?

[Lily]

Hello Ninochka!

Welcome to the forum!  In 2007, I joined this forum with the same idea in mind, to find out what the foreign men looking in Russian women. After a few months of my activity here, I realized that it would be better for me to search for a man on his native soil Then I applied for immigration, and now I am searching in Canada 

You know, some men are equally hard to get on a real date even if they live 20 km apart from me!

[JohnDearGreen]

This site is down for those who are from Russia. And for all with the Russian ip match.сom closed. I know there are many themed dating sites (Christians, single parents, Mormons, fishermen, farmers, high, low). I checked many of them. In Russia, it does not work.   

Host your own web site with a couple of pages of pictures.  In html, you can include what is called meta tags. Meta keywords help search engines to find your web page.  So you can add keywords like AFA, Anastasia, Cupid, Russiandating, etc.   Also when a man emails you, you can just point him to your web page, instead of having to attach pics to emails to each and every man.


http://www.sitepoint.com/meta-tags-html-basics-best-practices/

[BillyB]

Some themes easily support the desire of men to meet with two or more girls. It's a shame. We girls are talking with many men. But when there is a planning meeting, socializing with other men almost stops.

 

Welcome to the forum Nina,


Until there is a commitment, men and women are free to see and talk to other people. Like you said in another post, men may make a promise to come and disappear. Why should women waste months of their life for a man that may not show up? She is free to communicate with other men until the man who promises to visit her makes a commitment to a relationship.

I'm an ordinary girl. I have a few extra pounds and I do not often make new photos. I suggest going on Skype, because I have a webcam. Many men say compliments and very lively talk. And then disappear. Why can not immediately say that the conversation is not on Inters?

20% of the most beautiful women will get 80% of the attention from men. If you feel you are not as beautiful as most women, then men will often disappear when they think a more beautiful woman is giving them attention. You must win a man over with your personality and character and if you can't speak good English, then men will have a difficult time understanding you.


I wish every man and women looking for international marriages success but the truth is most women who look for an international man for marriage will not be successful. You should find the best man for you even if he is living in your city. Don't waste your life with international men who can't make a decision within a few months to visit you.

[LuckyLovers]

Hi Nina,

Welcome to RWD!  Your written English is great for someone who learnt just 2 years ago.  Good luck with your search.

We are new to RWD too.  Looking forward to meeting up in the forum.

Best regards,
Lida from LuckyLovers

[mendeleyev]

Добро пожаловать, Нина!

[Natali_Tsymbalyuk]

Привет, Нина !
Приятно видеть тут  русскоязычных девушек )))
Какие сайты ты использовала для знакомства, если не секрет  ?

[Gator]

NinaG,

 

Your words suggest you are a sincere woman who would make a wonderful wife.   Also, you are lucky to reside in St. Petersburg.  It is a glorious city, and many a man should want to travel to St. Petersburg merely for the tourism.  Add to that the opportunity to have a fine RW be his tour guide, and it is heaven on earth.

Finding a foreign husband is not easy.   I met many, many RW and all seemed to have the same experience -   most of the men will just waste your time.   It is generally accepted that 95% of the men who write RW will never take a trip.  Many simply do not have the money.  Some are troubled by the language barrier.  Many could already be married but are bored, so they play on the Internet.  Many are good guys but are not ready to marry. 

Even if you meet a serious man, the odds do not favor that your two personalities, values, goals, etc. will be compatible. 
When searching in Russia and Ukraine, I was serious.  I spent a lot of time communicating with a RW before deciding to meet her.  Over several years, I met about 25 RW.  All were attractive women, most much younger than I dated in America.   Of these 25 women, only two met the following criteria:

1)  She and I really enjoyed spending time together.

2)  After a few days together,  I felt some mutual connection (not love, but loving feelings). 



I do not want to discourage you.  Instead I encourage you to keep fishing! I give you the following advice:



-  PATIENCE is important when fishing.

-  Relax and enjoy the process of getting to know different men - this should be fun, not work.

-  Do not invest your emotions in any man until you meet him (similar to our advice for men  not to fall in love with a photo).

-  Do not demand anything from the man such as he can meet only you while visiting Russia.   

-  When on Skype with men, talk freely about simple things to determine if this man makes you feel easy, even makes you laugh.

-  Use 25% of your Skype time to discuss serious questions:  his family and your family, whether he has decided he is ready to marry if he meets Ms. Right, whether he wants babies and how many, his goals in his professional life, etc.

-  Eliminate the men who express little interest in learning something about Russia or who say many negative things about Russia.  I say this because such men may not respect what it means to be a RW, and would not recognize your needs in adjusting to his country.    Also, eliminate the men who show little interest in traveling to St. Piter to meet you. 

-  Smile a lot, say "thank you," ...... the other American mannerisms.

 

[jone]

Nina,

I sent a request to the customer service department of Farmers Only to see if there was something that they could do to allow your participation.

We'll see what they come back with.

[NinaG]

Привет, Нина !
Приятно видеть тут  русскоязычных девушек )))
Какие сайты ты использовала для знакомства, если не секрет  ?

Спасибо. Я использую Craigslist, Elenasmodels (там очень много отказов у меня), russiancupid, 7brides, bellove. Пока это все. А ты какие используешь если не секрет?

Even if you meet a serious man, the odds do not favor that your two personalities, values, goals, etc. will be compatible. 
When searching in Russia and Ukraine, I was serious.  I spent a lot of time communicating with a RW before deciding to meet her.  Over several years, I met about 25 RW.  All were attractive women, most much younger than I dated in America.   Of these 25 women, only two met the following criteria:

1)  She and I really enjoyed spending time together.

2)  After a few days together,  I felt some mutual connection (not love, but loving feelings). 

I know it's not easy. Just makes me wonder what I am looking for 2 years and have never met in real life with men. I thought to go to a dating agency, but it turned out that Russian girls are fee. And very much so. Now I take photos. And please evaluate the two of them and tell me how easy is it to find a man with such appearance? Maybe something in me no wrong?