Any tips for surviving the long periods apart?

[Sous02]

Wondering if anyone can suggest some ways to deal with the long periods apart you must have endured?
Thanks everyone

[Sous02]

Sorry folks that should have been surviving! Big thumbs little iPad!

[msmobyone]

Skype, imagination and looking forward to meeting again ..you will still go crazy 

[Muzh]

I would suggest you soak it in, the desire of being with her while being apart. It will make you appreciate her much more.


But if you cannot do that, then there is your hand. 

[TagUrIt898]

The absence is a killer, I hate the separation!  I've never taken a moment me and my fiancé had together for granted. In the end I think it will make us stronger.

Okay so on to your question.  Of course there are the usual Skype, Viber or WhatsApp chats you can have.  My fiancé and I exchange pics quite often. Not just posing planned pictures either. Sometimes just everyday life stuff, like me taking my dog to the park, or her going to the track to run laps, it makes you feel that you are there with them. About a month ago (and I'm sure I'm not the first to think of it) I suggested to my P, that we make short videos and send them to each other every now and then. Again with the idea that you are not so far removed from your significant other's life. A video is something that has their voice, obviously their image and you can play it as many times as you want.  Just recently I sent P a video of me making turkey chili 😝. Silly I know, but it's my chance to share with her what's going on here. We share with each other what we do on a daily basis so we can both stay connected. And honestly that's what it's really about, staying connected and not letting the relationship fade away. 

When I have those moments of loneliness and we all have them (if you don't, than you shouldn't be here) I look at the pictures from my trips. I read the emails and messages we've exchanged.  I look at the videos and they all remind me why I'm doing this. It takes so much courage and strength to maintain an FSU relationship.  You both have to remain focused and stay the course. It's not a permanent situation and simply remind yourselves of that.

Tag



I posted a thread similar to your question.

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=19862.msg409971#msg409971

In the post I had Polina, give her side of it all from an FSUW standpoint.

[BillyB]

Just recently I sent P a video of me making turkey chili 😝. Silly I know,

It is silly but not to a fiancée that cares about every detail of what's going on in your life. When I was waiting for my wife to come over, I took photo of the house and showed her what it looked like. She had ideas on how to decorate each room. Although apart, we continued to talk about building a life together.

[Sous02]

The everyday life suggestion is a good one. Being a male sometimes the obvious is not so obvious. That must be why she keeps sending me those kinds of pictures.

[ML]

Simple.  Adopt the navy man's approach to women.

[SANDRO43]

"Any tips for sieving the long periods apart?"

A new meaning, in addition to passing something through a sieve ?

[mendeleyev]

Skype (which has SMS texting), and an internet phone service like Vonage, etc. You can even get her a Vonage unit as unit to unit calls are free. The Vonage app also allows you to use a mobile phone just like a home phone.

Use the time to make "love deposits" into her emotional love bank. Short emails, photos, poems, and anything that suggests that you are thinking about her all the time.

I still tell Mrs M that I only think about her 4 times a day when apart: all morning, all day, all evening, and all night. She has never grown tired of hearing that.

[Boethius]

No one on this forum (and I really do mean no one) had as long a wait as I did.

I was young, so I was in university.  I studied.  I read voraciously.  I studied some more.  And I improved myself.  But more importantly, I seared in my mind what it is like to be alone, and I have never lost sight of that.

[TagUrIt898]

No one on this forum (and I really do mean no one) had as long a wait as I did.

I was young, so I was in university.  I studied.  I read voraciously.  I studied some more.  And I improved myself.  But more importantly, I seared in my mind what it is like to be alone, and I have never lost sight of that.

I can tell by posts and your spirit that you are a strong woman.  I believe you when you said you had a long wait. I'm curious to know how long exactly the process took for you and yours?


Tag

[Boethius]

Years.

[I/O]

Wondering if anyone can suggest some ways to deal with the long periods apart you must have endured?

Enjoy the hell out of being alone..!! Once you're together, you'll wish soon enough for time alone.

[Faux Pas]

Enjoy the hell out of being alone..!! Once you're together, you'll wish soon enough for time alone.

Well I/O, I guess it's a safe bet that the honeymoon is over? 

[I/O]

Hey FP, I'm a realist who tells it how it is - don't tell me you don't understand what I mean.

[Faux Pas]

Hey FP, I'm a realist who tells it how it is - don't tell me you don't understand what I mean.

Yeah I/O I know exactly what you mean. It was a humorous jab  Good to see you posting

[I/O]

I know exactly what you mean.

Have you ever noticed they are in your face about half hour before they wake up and still there half hour after they go to sleep?

[Faux Pas]

Have you ever noticed they are in your face about half hour before they wake up and still there half hour after they go to sleep?

 

I haven't heard it put quite that way before but, yeah. Sometimes in a good way and sometimes, not so good 

[zooble]

I've been doing the pictures of everyday life through whatsapp/email and it is working so far for me. Visits can be over 6 months apart.

Photos are great whether it's of you/her or something you/her are looking at. I'm not exactly having an adventure every week so it does need to be mundane-y stuff most of the time. They don't have to be great from an artistic point of view and ones taken with a phone would be good enough. Of course you still shouldn't look like you've just woken up. If you do have time to make them nice then extra points.

Even if you have hundreds of photos of each other, another one is great to let you know she is thinking of you and you of her, right now.

I'm typically sending and receiving a total of about 3-10 per week.

If you have pets/small children then you have it easy since that is more interesting things to send!

You can also just send funny or interesting pictures you've seen on the internet.

Video/audio is also great but not as easy.

When it's time to see each other again planning a visit/holiday together is always a winner.

If you like taking photos then in the time after the visit/holiday is over those are great to share over time.

Other than direct stuff like that, you could perhaps spend more time with friends and family to make up for the lack of in person contact with each other. Help to keep your mind off it. 

[jone]

Have you ever noticed they are in your face about half hour before they wake up and still there half hour after they go to sleep?

I/O, it's not so bad.  Could be worse.   Worse might be having a bunch of children.  Then they are in your face as well.  Lucky you don't have that problem.

[sparky114]

Live on the right side of the pond .....only 3.5 hours from Moscow here 

[ML]

Live on the right side of the pond .....only 3.5 hours from Moscow here 

Convenient for one of Putin's bombing runs.

[sparky114]

Convenient for one of Putin's bombing runs.

nah . we got you lot looking after us 

But close enough to go and get the goods before you have landed

[Anotherkiwi]

I/O, it's not so bad.  Could be worse.   Worse might be having a bunch of children.  Then they are in your face as well.  Lucky you don't have that problem.

Yes, he does!  He and Mrs I/O have four now.