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Author Topic: Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?  (Read 9178 times)

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Offline Bruno

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Yes BUT ... like everybody say, don't fall in love of photo... why ? little test... below, you have two photo of woman... make a choice, the more beautiful woman...



I don't know your choice but i can say that you have wrong... no one photo show a more beautiful woman that the other... all the two photo are from Galina, my future wife... it is the same woman...

 

BUT yes, you can fall in love ... Getting to know someone through the internet takes longer and is different than getting to know someone who lives in your local area. Realize that getting to know someone over the internet is different than getting to know someone in person. This may seem obvious, but when you are caught up in emotional and intimate communication with another person through writing words and thoughts and expressing emotions to one another, it is easy to develop what feels like a profound intimacy that is similar to what you would develop with someone who you meet in person. The advantage to long distance communication is that the two of you can focus on sending and receiving words and ideas to one another, and being less obscured by physical attraction.


Yes it's possible to be in love even if you do not see the person and correspond with them just online, on the Internet.


So, if you have feelings for your Russian girlfriend without even having met her yet, and feel comfortable with each other during your communicating, it probably means that when you meet each other that there is a good chance for success.

 

Now, the love can only appear on a long time... and with a lot of letter... only after two month of communication with Galina, we have begin speak about love... two month is very short but in these short delay, she have send me 102 letter... and i say letter, not little post-it about "tender kiss", "i miss you", ...

 

We have write about serious thing... describe our own character, what we think over several thema, what we like and dislike, about the future, children, education, the possible problem,...

 

And now, i have a great question : Is it possible to be in love if you meet the person during only two week of holiday ?

I don't think, two week is very short for know someone... and during a meeting, you are enough busy...

Offline Jack

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #1 on: January 24, 2005, 04:15:25 PM »

 
 
 

Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
 
HELL NO (my opinion only of course)   How can you be in love with someone you have never met?
 
Bruno I think their are many men who think they are in love, hope they are in love and hope she loves him, before meeting. And sometimes it does happen. Sometimes you can win the million dollar lottery as well.
 
I think thru corresponding you can develope an interest in someone and you can feel you want to fall in love with that person, but I think it's hard to fall in love with someone you have never met in person, BUT, I will say, I think their are guys in pursuit for a Russian bride who fall in love everyday with a lady they are writing and have never met.
 
I think a LOT of guys fall in love with a photo as well.
 
 
ps. Nice looking lady!

Offline 5150

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2005, 05:44:04 PM »
No because there are so many more variables that will surface in person that do NOT surface during letters. During a letter you can take your time & REALLY think & evaluate what you are writing. Whereas in person many situation can come up where you will react instantaneously thus showing your "true colors". NOt to mention the little pet peeves etc. that you do NOT see or experience in letters. In other words in a letter you will see the persons "good" side but that is only one facet of the persona.

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #3 on: January 24, 2005, 11:17:50 PM »
What is Love.... several people think to sex when speak about Love... and in so case, when sex and love have the same signification... i agree that Love is not possible without meet the partner...

But when you see Love like friendship but a level more high and intimate ( not physical but spiritual level ) ... love is possible without meet ...

I think that these who fall in Love of photo , these who can't fall in Love with meeting are the same type of people... need of the physical ...

Physical love is only the result of the spiritual love ( like a gift ) but not the main goal...

And "5150" , strange name... with letter, it is not true that you show only your good side... i have write about my bad side... she know that i have grey hair but i use haircolor, that i have bad teeth ( but thank to our medicine, you don't see it too much ), that i have some protection for winter ( good clothes hide these fat )...

It is only a problem of honesty... with your future partner and yourself... she know all about myself and not only by my words... when i feel it can be the right woman, i give the phone number of my ex russian wife... last test... one time, one woman have reply, sorry, we are not compatibel but you are a good man... and with Galina, all was right...

Why i work so... i have not a lot of money... i have write to 800 woman before find Galina... do you see me meet 800 woman... my life is not enough long for this... and each time, in letter, i have slowly show all my black side... because i have no time and money to loose... people need to be honest with herself and the woman they write ... this is the basic of a good relation...

In all case, you can only know that the love is real of not only after some time... and it is possible to be in love but see that life together will be not possible... the best in so case is stay friend...

I have make these error with my previous wife... i have meet very fast her... without know her really and feel love, only some interest... the meeting was enough hot ( don't believe the man who say that russian woman are cold... they don't show easy her felling in public but in private life... my God !!! )... On the physical side, it was perfect, we appreciate each other character and have marry...

But with the time, we have see that we was different, too much... we have try to change, adapt to each other but it was too much difficult and we have choice to make a divorce ... a friendly one... herself say always now that i am a good man, that i can make a woman happy but that between us, love is not possible... i speak about real love... for physical love, it was not a problem, same after the divorce, we have know it... ( but not more since i know Galina )...

Yes, meeting is need but ready the meeting is first priority... know the woman before and don't think that you are not a mormal man when you feel already some love... We are man and think always about sex ... but sex is not love, it is our weak side... man can be blind by great meeting and make the fault that i have make with my first wife... i was young ( all is relative ), not ready, she was sexy, the chimistry was good but we don't know really each other...

Love is like friendship... i have a lot of friend in the world that i have never meet... only contact with internet... after some time, only the good friend stay, the other dissappear...

You already don't believe that it is possible... see the forum... he is enough new now... but only by ready the post of people, you can begin know a little more about these people, what they think...

And Jack, Galina is not a nice looking woman... she is like several other woman... but now that i know her better, i appreciate her inner beauty... when she have send the usual photo, i have almost stop... but for one time, i have use my brain... and understand that beauty is something who have nothing too make with feeling... i see it with my own photo... with my work clothes of the friday evening in disco... one ugly and one good but same man... photo on the Net show the woman at is best ( for these who can pay this ), it is not the woman that you go see each day...

Love definitions :

Love has many meanings in English. It can mean an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or emotional state. In ordinary use, it usually refers to interpersonal love.

There are as many forms of love as there are lovers. However, all forms of love have some common factors and issues.

Discussions of love are inevitably colored by the language used to describe it. Each language, developing alongside a corresponding culture, has a different set of words to describe love. As such, it's difficult to discuss different cultures' views without referencing their language.

unrequited love. Interpersonal love is usually found in an interpersonal relationship, such as between family members, friends, and couples. However, people often express love for other people outside of these relationships through charity and volunteering.

Some elements that are often present in interpersonal love:

Passion, or sexual energy, is probably the most important element in determining how a relationship is seen. This is because passion is often considered undesirable or unhealthy in love. In many religions and systems of ethics, it is wrong to have passionate love for immediate family, or outside of a committed relationship.

Offline Jack

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2005, 04:04:32 AM »

"And Jack, Galina is not a nice looking woman"

Whoaaaaa Bruno, I think maybe you should write me off-line. You do NOT say what you said to a woman you are soon to marry! Bruno, I hope Galina does not read this and if you can I would suggest you delete that pretty quick. And the truth is their is an attractive side to her photo on the right.

Every woman wants to feel she looks good and she especially wants her husband to feel she looks good. You met 800 ladies and could not find a woman who is as beautiful in the inside as outside? Shame on YOU! You admit to finding a woman who has a beautiful inside but NOT a beautiful outside?

Bruno I admit I like your straight forwardness approach to things but their are sometimes when a little white lie is appropriate. For example if you are out on a first date with a woman and you think she is a borderline dog and she ask's you, "So Bruno, do you think I am attractive?", I hope you will not say "No, you are borderline dog, ruff, ruff." Now this is how you truly feel I understand I understand but in my opinion to avoid hurting a woman's feelings you should something like, "Well Lassie, I think you are an attractive woman. I do not feel the chemistry needed for man and wife but I know their is someone out their for you."

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2005, 06:07:53 AM »
I say it again... Galina is not a nice looking woman... but she is a nice woman...

The problem is the word looking... yes, woman appreciate that you say she is beautiful... but if you see only the beauty in a woman, short of late, she drop you... because you are only superficial and don't take care of real value of the woman...

And it is not a problem that Galina see these post... she know what i think, i have write it to her in the begin... but maybe it is need to explain a little more the context...

In the begin, i receive only photo from her where she was beautiful, sexy, sensual... and one day, she have send me two other photo, without make up, normal clothes... and the text of her letter was : " and now ? ..."

And i have send back usual photo of me, with gray hair, beard, working clothes... and i have reply that these photo don't change something... she was not the very beautiful woman i think but a woman like other, ... almost like other because i stay like her, for her inner beauty... and since these day, our relation was more strong and not so much superficial... she have test me and i was the first ( in three year of search ) who is not go away when she send these photo...

Maybe you can better understand with the own word of Galina ( from letter she have send me ) :

"I won(t hide that your answer was a surprise for me, because I though that you would be afraid to continue my communication with me after my revelations. And I was very glad to receive your letter, as it proves that your intentions are really serious and you are sincere, I am just happy to have such a friend as you are. You are already in my heart."

"As for pictures. The agency requires good professional pictures and they never put a girl on the site with bad amateur pictures. At first I was indignant at it - it's a deceit, but they persuaded me in a contrary. I understood that only experienced people worked in the agency who knew how to do better, we could trust them. What happened later you know. Now I can say I don't envy pretty women. I tried it. The beauty attracts a lot of men and many of them like to have a doll near them., but what is inside isn't important."

"Many people talked about beauty very much before us. Everybody understands that it's fleeting that it attracts much attention and admiration, but not always it attracts happiness. Russian writer A.S. Pushkin, you sent me his poetry on my e-mail, evaluated women's beauty. They were his muses, inspiration but the majority of his heroines were unhappy in love and stayed alone in old age when their beauty disappeared. Really the problem of our century is that nobody is interested in inner person's beauty. A beautiful picture attracts us, people like to see around only beautiful things and beautiful people too. But I'm used to choose friends according not to their appearance. He/she should be interesting to talk to any themes. A friend is not a person who envies your achievements but supports you in a hard moment and is glad when something well happens. But when I want to see beauty I go to the museum, to the nature with a friend. Although the person's beauty is nature too. Who said that a man had to be handsome to attract women. For example between Alain Delon and Jean-Paul Belmondo, I chose Belmondo. Why? Because I feel force inside him, none of women can refuse his smile."

Alain Delon is a beautiful man actor... Belmondo is enough ugly but have charm... It is why myself and Galina don't find us beautiful but we have some charm...

And about love via e-mail, i have ask it to Galina in the very beginning of our relation... she have reply me :

"I suppose if such an affection and love (through letters) appear, it may be for the whole life. What is love? It depends on what it like. Love on the physical level is like passion that disappears as quickly as it appeared. If love is on the spiritual level, when people know each other gradually, when the company of one person substitutes you the whole world? and when you are ready to do anything in sake of this person. Everyone chooses what he likes. Perhaps, it also depends on the intellectual level of a person. I agree with you that sex is a really important topic in our lives and if man and a woman are intimate, they must not be ashamed to speak on this theme. But perhaps not in letters, but not before their personal meeting tete-a-tete."

And about little lie, we have choose to be honest over all... no lie and direct speak about problem same little... now, our actual speaking is about religion... we know some problem because of her father... i go to orthodox church but i am catholic... but her father, orthodox cleric, wish i become orthodox...

I have try to a other forum that woman married with western man say what they think... Why ? Because these woman can help man who search to marry a FSU woman... sometime, like now, i go copy and paste what say Galina... only for the last two month, i have around 300 page of letter from her where she say what she think about a lot of thema... politic, religious, love, agency, sex, school, work, integration...

And about the 800 woman, i have find one... Galina ... i have write to 800 woman, around 60 have reply... from this, i have keep only 20... after one month, have stay only 5... after two month, only 2... i have like very much one but we have understand that we was not compatible... have stay Galina. We don't agree on all but we have a lot of common meaning...

I like sex but you need understand that i become more old, i don't search only a woman for good physical pleasure, for the beauty, ... i search a woman that i can life the rest of my day... and i think that Galina will be these woman...

And why i have begin to write at so much woman ... because i know that the chance of success is very low... and that i am become very difficult ... i have use 7 years of my life with the first russian wife... i wish no more a misluck... better hard in the begin for keep the good one... and when it was not lucky, again start write to a lot of woman...

And again, i say that galina is not a beautiful woman like i am not a beautiful man, but she have a lot of charm... and you example with first date is not realistic because both man and woman go try to hide the physical imperfection...

Myself, i feel not me a beautiful man ( but i have no problem with this )... below, two photo of me from december... one at work and the other during the marriage of one Macedonian friend with a Belgium woman... the second is better but i am the same man ... beauty is something who have no value in a very long term relationship... how beautiful you will be in 30 year !!!



 

Offline LookingForRW

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #6 on: January 26, 2005, 09:26:25 AM »
Yes ,its possible,but as a practical matter ,no. Ive been many times speak some Russain and have found 100% of the time the lady was TOTALLY differnet in person than I imagined her ,even after speaking to her (on the phone) and writing letters.First, how do you even know its really a photo of her in the last decade?.Ive met more than 1 lady whom I swear ,the photo (if her) was 10 years old.Second,its that intangable "physical chemistry" that is sooo important ,that can only be known upon meeting (in person).

You got a dilema.You only have 1-2 weeks of vacation and you want to hit the ground running.I understand.But if you rush it and make a mistake,you will have a ton of regrets and costs.Rushing is a terrible idea.

Does anyone know how the spell check works?


Offline LookingForRW

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #7 on: January 26, 2005, 09:43:19 AM »
Did you miss the 6th commanment of the 10 RW commandmentrs?

6) Dont fall in love w/a photo.

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #8 on: January 26, 2005, 10:10:19 AM »
No, i have not forget the 6th commandment from God Dan :-)))

From the begin, i try to explain that fall in love with photo mean nothing... serious.

My two foto are taken in December 2004. The two from Galina, from April 2004...

And i say too, don't rush... take the time to write and know each other very good...

But you write : " 100% of the time the lady was TOTALLY differnet in person than I imagined her "

... maybe it is because you use too much your imagination... make your meaning on what she write and not on what you think... maybe woman can lie... but when you write several time about almost the same thing, she cannot hide always the lie...

You write : "Second,its that intangable "physical chemistry" that is sooo important ,that can only be known upon meeting (in person)."


Why it is so important ??? Same if you make love each day, it is only 1 hours by day... the rest of the time, you live together... and it is where the character is very important, the compatibility of mind... And how you see if the chimistry is good... you count the orgasm,... you check if she know all posity of Kamasoutra... By experience, i can say you that RW are enough hot in the bedroom and i have always know my pleasure without problem... and same if she is not good, you can always learn her how to make :-)))

And why only 1 of two week of vacation... for my next meeting in May, i go use almost all my vacation time, one month... and for December, the rest plus my over hours of work from the year...

Do you know fast food... the meal are bad... the service at restaurent is slow but better... apply the same about search a wife and meet her... take your time... fast dating ( week vacation with several woman ) work but be worry about the quality of the relation...

Yes,  know, time is money... but take more time in the begin can spare you a lot of money after,... in case of divorce if you have find one... of if you need to repeat several time these fast dating for find the good one ( the best one, not the perfect one, because perfection don't exist )...

Offline Jack

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #9 on: January 26, 2005, 10:37:51 AM »
But you write : " 100% of the time the lady was TOTALLY different in person than I imagined her ".......... maybe it is because you use too much your imagination...
 
 
Now just look at what you two wrote.   One of you says that 100% of the women he met were different in person than he had imagined her to be.  And the other of you writes   Maybe it is because too much imagination.
 
ding, ding, ding, does anyone hear any bells going off?
 
If the newer guys will read this exchange of words and will just believe this as being the gospel, then more of you new guys are going to be more efficient in your pursuit.
 
What's one of the biggest mistakes we men make about the women, or women we are writing too?  We imagine them to be something more than they are. Most of us do this. And when you write the same women, 3, 4, 5 times a week, you are probably, without knowing it, making this woman to be bigger than she really is. You are imaging her to be this way and that way. I myself, the one time I wrote one and visited one (wovo), had unknowingly made Ludmila to be 10ft tall in my mind. And when I met her, hell, I walked right by her in the St. Pete airport, never recognized her. Talk about embarrassing. And why?....., because she was only 5ft 7, she wasn't 10ft tall and I was looking for the woman I had built to be 10ft tall.
 
And guess whose mistake that was, ......it was mine, not her's.
 
As Looking for RW refers too, he did the same to all the ladies he met. And as Bruno tells him why, because you imagined them to be more than they were.
 
This happens a lot newby's.
 

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #10 on: January 26, 2005, 11:48:05 AM »
And again, in your example, you speak about the physical... info about the high of the woman, you can read it direct in the ads she have post... but certainly, your eyes was fixed on something other, ... a attractive photo...

The real problem with newby's is they they rush to the first very sexy woman with badpack... meet her, have torrid night, marry her... and cannot life together because they are incompatible...

Second problem is with letter... several newby's write about love... and not about life... take the time to learn the meaning of the woman about several subject who can be important for a future life together...

In your example, you have chance... she is not like you have think... but for me, my ex wife was better that i think... she was hot... i have marry her and divorce seven year after because it was not more possible to life together.... and it was my mistake because i have not take the time to know her really before meet her...

Don't dream, we ( men ) cannot control ourself when our hormon begin work... if your RW is a beauty, when you meet her, you loose your mind... and she control you easy... know her character, hearth, meaning before meet her...

The first steps for newby's is too read the full ads... and when it is not enough information, send all the questions with you first letter, you introduction letter...

How much people don't send directly the introduction letter... beautiful photo... click e-mail address ... copy / paste ... send ... next one ...

My advice to newby's : Be ready BEFORE start.

The very first thing you need to do is take a close look at yourself. Ask yourself some tough questions -- be honest. Who am I? What qualities do I have to offer a woman? Why do I want to meet a Russian woman? It is imperative to know the answers to these questions before you begin your search. You must understand what group of ladies to point yourself toward.

When you are comfortable with your answers to these questions, begin to make two lists of qualities and characteristics of the woman you wish to find. One list should be of the qualities and characteristics that the lady simply must possess. The other list is of the qualities and characteristics you simply will not tolerate. Your eventual goal is to narrow the field down to one perfect lady. There is a big selection so use your ideals as guidelines, but also be reasonable.

And for letter ... If you don't already know this, you should. Every lady's favorite subject is herself. Don't go on and on rambling about yourself. Ask questions. Even general questions at first will impress her with your attentiveness.

However, don't forget to ask questions that are important for the selection process. It's never too soon to start weeding the field. The question might be as simple as, "I like to take walks in the rain because the whole world seems fresh. What do you like to do on a rainy day?" If I know women, they will most likely answer, "Sleep all day," but you can ask just the same. Maybe your passion is skydiving, and you are only interested in a woman with adventurous spirit. This one question could send a lot of candidates to the circular file. Maximize the effectiveness of your letters by asking the important questions.

There are a few more issues about asking questions.

Watch out for the Parrot response. Some women will answer with what they think you want to hear. If you lead, they will follow. Example: "I like Urtica Doica. Do you like Urtica Doica?" Of course, the answer will be, "Yes!" Even if they don't know what a Urtica Doica is. From time to time, throw in a question without explanation.

Another great tip for finding out a person's attitudes and disposition is to ask questions in supposition. Example: "Suppose you are sailing in the ocean. Your boat sinks, and you swim to a small deserted island with nothing but the clothes you are wearing. What would you like to find on the island?" You can learn a lot about a lady's personality this way. If she answers, "Food and water," she's probably practical; "A cellular phone," she's a thinker; "A million dollars," greedy; "Ten studley Polynesian men," well, just run away.


Write letter with your brain... everybody have one, use it ...

cameraguy

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #11 on: January 27, 2005, 10:48:08 AM »
Is it possible to fall in love with someone you have never met
in person?

Yes, both of those photos do look like the same person.
A bad photo and  a good photo.   ...She  IS  cute.

Your question is something I have been asking myself. I think
I agree with you. I have emailed a few women and before
doing that, I have researched the women using astrology.
I have alway sbeen interested in astrology and I have noticed
that there is a pattern to the women I choose. I find that I am
most compatible with certain types: Cancer, Virgo, Leo, Libra,
and Aries.  So that elminates more than half of the women out
there. Those are called 'sun signs'.  I also research the woman's
Venus and Mars signs.

I have exchanged quite a few emails with Larisa from Ukraine
and she is very open, intelligent, and direct. We discuss many
things. from these emails I am getting a picture of who she is
and she's growing on me. This may be love. The real deal.
We both agree that to really determine if we are in love, we must
look into each other's eyes and walk with each other. We already
enjoy communicating. We already have things in common.
When we finally meet, we will know a lot about each other.
This is invaluable. Imagine meeting a woman for the first time
at a 'social' and you feel those good vibes, but what do you
know about the person? On the other hand, I may meet Larisa
and feel no good vibes at all, even though we've had great
emails. I hope that doesn't happen. Her emails seem deep and
sincere. If my impressions are totally different when I do meet
her, then I will have to reassess my strategy.    -doug

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #12 on: January 27, 2005, 01:38:58 PM »
For the first part, i don't believe in astrologie but it is your own choice... and several russian woman are enough supertisious ....

For the second, it is perfect.... first know enough about the woman followed by meeting... direct spring in fast-food-one-week-meeting with a several woman each  day is not the right method to find a good wife...

And about photo, there is not bad of good... from Galina, the first is make in winter and it is enough cold... the second in professional studio... when you RW go life with you, she don't use always beautifull clothes, with some make up, ... only in special occassion... the first photo is like you go see you RW each day... the second for new-year occassion...

Almost all woman can be beautiful when they have the time to take care about herself... but in normal life, they have not time... work, take care of home, shopping, children...

Offline Mamma D

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #13 on: January 27, 2005, 04:11:32 PM »
Dreams are wonderful...but there is always the time, where reality walks in....and often dreams and reality are on a collision course. This is when two people meet for the first time....the ultimate blind date!

People also will change over time....Priorities change... it is a natural thing, if it doen't grow it withers and dies!

In the beginning, it is each other (or should be).
Then there will be children, work...and in todays world, there is need to earn enough money to support the family, and then to nurture it.
There will seem, to never be enough time to meet all the obligations facing both parents.

Both husband and wife will be juggleing many balls...and sometimes one or both will drop one.

What I want you to think about, is how will you face a new life with a partner you do not know?
Does he/she have a volitile temper? Do they hold grudges?
Can he/she sit down and discuss problems as they arise? Does he/she run from adversity or stand strong?
How does he/she deal with disappointment?
And a hundred other questions, you will only know when you have spent time togather. Lots of time....and there is THE problem. Most men do not have the time to travel often to a place half a world away to spend time with the new lady or family....so these things are pushed back to deal with later....they can come back to bite you!

Do what you need to do... take your time and be sure. Trust yourself. Don't spend your time looking for scammers...for you will likely find what you look for.

Look for a lady that is most like the persons you love and respect....one you can sit in the evenings with, and not need to talk... you probably already know where you stand in her world.

What did you see for yourself,the last ime you were at this place in the road of life......how has it worked out....what can you do differantly to make a better life for the both of you?

When reminded, that an old mans Altzshimer diseased wife didn't know him, He replied..."but I know her".

I can only wish you the kind of grin I so often see on three happy faces....It doesn't get any better!


Mamma D
« Last Edit: January 27, 2005, 04:16:00 PM by Mamma D »
May those that love us, love us.
And those that don't love us,May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts,May He turn their ankles,
 So we will know them by their limping.

God put your arm about my shoulder... and your hand over my MOUTH!

cameraguy

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #14 on: January 27, 2005, 08:34:44 PM »
Bruno, the first photo is bad, meaning it's a little out of
focus and the lighting is not good, plus she is too far from
the camera. She herself looks good.

It doesn't matter to me if you understand astrology.
It works for me. 'Love at first sight' also is real, although
many will say it's just lust or fantasy. Those people just have
not experienced it. That's okay. I think love can happen
without meeting someone. Many things are possible.  -doug

Offline KenC

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #15 on: January 28, 2005, 08:08:36 AM »
Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?

NO!

KenC
You are a den of vipers and thieves-Andrew Jackson on banks
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies-Thomas Jefferson

Offline Bruce

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #16 on: January 28, 2005, 08:57:25 AM »
An individual has to go over and meet before he can even realistically think about love.  Lusting after a girl in a photo is one thing - reality hits when you get off the plane and meet.  Some girls look better in person than photos, others the opposite.  My experience showed me that going over to meet one girl was a mistake.  My advice is to go to a target rich environment, meet alot of girls and start realistically (that means real women - not photographs) "weeding" them out.  You can go over and meet one woman, but your chances of finding your ideal girl after meeting just this one woman is exceedingly low. 
« Last Edit: January 28, 2005, 08:58:00 AM by Bruce »
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline Muzh

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #17 on: January 28, 2005, 08:59:02 AM »
I'm not new to this so I will throw in my 0.02.  Is it possible?  I say yes.  But not everyone is the same.  I've been married to my UW for almost 5 years and I fell in love with her eyes the moment I saw her on a free site.  Call me a romantic fool, but we do love each other and life is good.  When we met for the first time the earth shook.  Actually, it was a tremor (3.2 on the scale), but you know what I mean.

Now, there are guys that have to see to believe, and nothing wrong with that.  My experience has been that women in general and former Soyuz W in specific are extremely romantic.  An old saying in the old country is that men love with their eyes, women with their ears.  Can someone that has never met the other fall in love.  I'll bet you that if a man charms the living daylights out of her via long distance (email, phone, instant messages), she will fall head over heels for him.

The problem is that guys have lost the art of charming.  Just look at all the responses here, except for Bruno who is a hopeless romantic.  And Bruno, she is a pretty lady.
"Mr Putin is discovering that global finance is more frightened of the US Securities and Exchange Commission than Russian T90 tanks."

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #18 on: January 28, 2005, 10:22:41 AM »
Muzh,

I agree that Galina is a pretty woman but what i find pretty is not only her physical side, i have take the time to know her... I have write her the first time because i find her attractif... but feeling have appear because our e-mail exchange, our daily SMS, our phone call, our post exchange ... i have learn a lot about her and i have begin feel love...

In the beginning, Galina have think that it was not possible to fall in love without meet... below what she have write about the thema in our letter exchange :

"I think it's easy to get know you, understand you and estimate weather we match each other according to such letter you write me. I think it's not difficult to love a person according to his letter for a romantic nature. And it's easy to get attached and make friends when reading the letter you feel that its author has similar opinion on many things and it looks as if he repeats your thoughts.

I suppose if such an affection and love (through letters) appear, it may be for the whole life. What is love? It depends on what it like. Love on the physical level is like passion that disappears as quickly as it appeared. If love is on the spiritual level, when people know each other gradually, when the company of one person substitutes you the whole world? and when you are ready to do anything in sake of this person. Everyone chooses what he likes. Perhaps, it also depends on the intellectual level of a person."

"I have such a feeling that I know you for a long time and it's easy to talk to you on different themes. I don't want you to doubt in me and promise that if anything changes in my feelings to you I would surely tell you about it."

"My feelings to you every day grow more and more! But I am afraid, not therefore it is terrible to me to start up love in the heart that is why that I am afraid of her to lose."

"That feeling which I test to you now can be named only the beginning of strong feelings. But as far as it will grow and in what to turn depends on us! I very much want to tell sometime to you on an ear : I love you... "

"You know, I start to trust, that it is possible to fall in love with the person on correspondence, not hearing never his voices, not having felt his smell and taste of lips. And all this due to you and your patience. "

"When in agency I have ceased to answer other men with which corresponded in parallel with you, to me have told, that I a rare silly woman. Because it is impossible to be up to the end confident anybody, yet there was no meeting and, that I risk to waste time and again to return to that from what began, that there were cases when weddings were broken. But I never listen to anybody, except for the heart."

"Thanks you for your long letters, for me open new sides of your soul and I, certainly I understand, that we not in all are similar to you, but are not present on the ground of two absolutely identical , but I know, that at us much in common and we shall be happy together."

"Today to us two months! Because on October, 14 I for the first time have received the letter from you! How can be such, what all for two months you became for me the most expensive and favourite person, I do not know? Earlier never would believe, that under letters it is possible to grow fond of the man... "

"Yesterday I talked to father, I told to it about you. Whether I do not remember I spoke you, but my father the opponent of that I searched to myself for the husband abroad and I did not tell to it earlier that I am engaged in it to not force it to worry once again. About it I could talk only to mum. But with you I to it have told about us also it have approved my choice."

"I very much love you and now I do not present the further life without you. To many my girlfriends and relatives I have told about us, because should share with them the happiness."

You can see the evolution... first friendship, followed by some feeling ( soulmate ) and finally love... and the first meeting was wonderful... and i have know the same evolution that Galina...

YES, FALL IN LOVE WITHOUT MEET IS POSSIBLE BUT NOT FOR EVERYBODY...

for this, it is need to write real letter and not only some little text about the weather... it is need to be honest and speak about all is possible... try to know each other...




Offline Jack

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #19 on: January 28, 2005, 12:24:43 PM »
YES, FALL IN LOVE WITHOUT MEET IS POSSIBLE
 
 
Calm down KenC, I can see you fuming.
 
Bruno, how can you fall in love with someone who you have never kissed, never held her hands, never sat two feet from her staring into her eyes and speaking to her in person?   You can't Bruno!
 
Maybe were talking two different love's here. Their's the love we have for good people in general, and then their is the love we have for someone we want to spend the rest of our lives with, someone we want to love the rest of our lives. Which love are you talking about Bruno?

Offline Dave_home

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #20 on: January 28, 2005, 11:11:27 PM »
Quote from: Jack
 Falling in love with someone before you actually meet them in person?  No, not really possible... I was in love with my perception of my girl's photos, and her emails, but I knew it meant nothing until I could look in her eyes, hold her hand, speak to her, kiss her, feel that electrical energy standing close to her, if it happened. When I met my girl the first time, there was definetly good chemistry between us, and we had great rapport as we talked about everything, I could see as my visit went on that she was exactly the girl I had written to in the past year!  but there was something much more to her! , something I didn't expect.... that could NOT be known by emails, phone conversations... and we had  communicated for a year!  It was her sense of HUMOR! she had the same as me.... we laughed and laughed at each other's joking, and it was like the GLUE of Life! the bonding of our souls together. It was as I said, unexpected and an incredible friendship started that we had not known before meeting in person. Everything we found out about each other during my visit was just more icing on the cake. Both of my visits with her were the most romantic experiences of my life.   I  wrote many girls to start with and narrowed it down to just one, and only visited one, she was, and is the last one I needed. I'm flying there in a few weeks to get her and son to come to America and live with me, we plan to marry soon after.   Dave

Offline Bruno

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #21 on: January 29, 2005, 02:28:50 AM »
Yes Jack, we speak about different Love...

I love Galina for her mind and heart... but several man when they speak about love think to sex... and for this, the meeting is needed...

But guy's don't forget that physical love is not for the rest of your life, same with Viagra, the time go come that you can't not more assume it...

But a spiritual love can stay to the end of your life...

I have make a mistake with my first marriage, very fast meeting without really know, ... a sexual attractive woman and i have loose my capacity to think ... i have marry her but we was not compatible...

Now, i don't take care so much about physical, i search a wife for stay with her to my last day... and for this, it is need some spiritual compatibility...

And with Galina, i have find all i need... more young and more sexy woman have write to me but with letter, i have understand that Galina was the right one... and this need time... 

When Jack write :

"Maybe were talking two different love's here. Their's the love we have for good people in general, and then their is the love we have for someone we want to spend the rest of our lives with, someone we want to love the rest of our lives. Which love are you talking about Bruno?"

I speak about the second type of love... but man think that physical attraction and sexual pleasure are from all life... the love spiritual love stay.... the physical dissappear with time...

Maybe Mamma D can teach us a lot about this, she have live a long time with the same man... enough long for the physical love dissappear ( become old )... i think that Mamma D is the best personn for speak about this ...


 

 

 

Offline KenC

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #22 on: January 29, 2005, 04:37:04 AM »
I guess the answer to this question can be found in ones definition of "love".  If your meaning of love has only to do with sexual attraction, then for sure one can fall in love with a photo.  But then it is only a fantasy until you get to know the woman better in person. 

Just so you guys don't think I am not numb to what you are saying here, let me tell you my beginings in this.  I was thunderstruck by a photo of Lena that was posted on a website.  I immediately called her.  I became completely infatuated with her personality through numerous phone calls.  The first time I actually met her, the sight of her took my breath away.  We had instant undeniable chemistry.  It was as though we were made for each other.  After more trips and her arrival to America, we married and have been in total happiness ever since.  But at what point was it "love"?

My answer would have to be some time after she came to America.  You see I think love is something that is built over time.  The time is used to completely know the other person.  You can love everything you know about the other person and still not be "in love" because you do not know enough to come to that conclusion.  By my definition you cannot be in love from a photo or even after a week of visiting.  Some guys get lucky and jump to an early conclusion that turns out OK.  Some are not so lucky.

Lena has turned out to be the love of my life.  I could have proposed over the phone and it probably would have not changed a thing.  But I didn't truly know that until much later when we really got to know each other.  If it is truly love, then there is no harm in being cautious and allowing time to tell all.  As a matter of fact, the courtship phase of our relationship was so wonderful, why would anyone want to rush it?  Only bad things can happen from rushing into a marriage.

KenC
You are a den of vipers and thieves-Andrew Jackson on banks
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies-Thomas Jefferson

cameraguy

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #23 on: January 29, 2005, 07:08:49 AM »
Bruce,

I just re-read your post, and you seem to be saying it's
bad to lust after a photo and that it's necessary to meet her face
to face. That makes sense, but what about the middle ground?
I mean lots of guys write dozens of letters or emails and also
sometimes have phone conversations too. In other words,
I've been emailing Larisa and we talk about everything.
A mental picture is forming of her personality and character.
I recommend doing this for everybody. We are getting to know
each other, just like you would on a series of in-person dates.
So it's not a case of sitting here just lusting after a cute photo. -doug

Offline Donna_Pedro

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Is it possible to be in love even if you do not meet the person ?
« Reply #24 on: January 29, 2005, 07:12:41 AM »
Well, the question needs to be asked in a different form - do you NEED to be  in love with someone  you have never  seen in person..Is it wise to be in love with the picture?  Is it responsible?  I would even put this question  as - is it responsible to fall in love  before you  get to know a person properly, even if you saw him for a few days, most of which you spent in bed? Its the lives of 2-3 people, not pictures we are talking about..
Anyway, this song is getting old...
Kaplah!

 

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