How soon to call a woman?

[dragonkid]

I thought it would be a nice change to the politics. So how soon do you guys get a woman over to skype or over the phone? What about language barriers?

For me , i give my number to the woman, as soon as she adds me onto whatsapp, i ring her right away, i don't even say hey back. Maybe there is some mystery that intrigues her to answer the phone i don't know. Some of the women speak good English, but others don't, but for me i know a bit of Russian, and have a lot of fun with the both of us trying to speak both Russian and english.

Share your thoughts and experiences

[Larry1]

I thought it would be a nice change to the politics. So how soon do you guys get a woman over to skype or over the phone? What about language barriers?

... Share your thoughts and experiences

When I was searching I tried to move to skype as soon as possible, preferably within a few days. At times I was successful and at times I was not. If a girl delayed without a good reason I would stop trying with her and move on. I heard a raft of different excuses for why a girl did not want to go to skype.

One of the nicest RW I came across did not have a good enough internet connection to allow skype video. We tried a few times but it never worked.  But she took a bus across town to an internet cafe to skype with me.

As for the language barrier I tried several times to develop rapport with a girl who didn't speak much English , but was never successful.

[dragonkid]

As for the language barrier I tried several times to develop rapport with a girl who didn't speak much English , but was never successful.

It is very hard, nearly impossible over skype. I dated my ex who couldn't speak english, you would think it was terrible, but it wasn't (this is in person). It was really funny, and we both had a laugh trying to figure out what the other person said. She thought she could let me ramble away, whilst she smiled and listened, till i told her if she didn't say anything in the next 30 seconds, i was going to have to kiss her , in simpler way of course. She got the message loud and clear, and couldn't stop trying to string along a conversation. Back then i couldn't speak a word of russian. 2 weeks later her english was good enough for basics conversations.

[BillyB]

I would ask for a phone number if I thought something was there to build on with the woman. After learning about each others beliefs and goals through messages or emails, I'd make a decision to call or abandon a woman. Once a woman gives you her number, she expects things to progress. There have been times I message the woman and after a few back and forth messages that seem to be going smooth and I feel she's excited, I'd ask for a phone number or even a date same day and get one if we happen to be in the same city.

[msmobyone]

No hard and fast rules

1/ you email

2/ you want to hear her voice - call using cellphone / viber whatsapp

3/ you skype - it works more reliably than viber for video - for us


With SC the emails went on for three days and then a phone call followed by - ''Let's see if the real you matches the photos''..

Viber / Whatsapp are relatively new phenomena and 'older' ladies are less likely to have a smart phone


You shouldn't need to push to skype unless she has a hang-up about how she looks.

Many FSU women like to be made up -looking their best and plan their calls  ..

After a while she'll call you anytime, if all's good 

[Trenchcoat]

When I was searching I tried to move to skype as soon as possible, preferably within a few days. At times I was successful and at times I was not. If a girl delayed without a good reason I would stop trying with her and move on. I heard a raft of different excuses for why a girl did not want to go to skype.

One of the nicest RW I came across did not have a good enough internet connection to allow skype video. We tried a few times but it never worked.  But she took a bus across town to an internet cafe to skype with me.

As for the language barrier I tried several times to develop rapport with a girl who didn't speak much English , but was never successful.

A girl may have decent reasons for not wanting to skype, may not be a scammer, etc. Too nervous, Fed up off spending time talking to guys that never come/decide on someone else, technology problem - not all can afford it or are knowledgeable/comfortable with technology, time it takes etc. I agree the girl is someone who must me considered more closely that she may be a scammer/not serious but I wouldn't write her off, not at the moment at least, lol.

The girl I am going to see I have not skyped with which may sound crazy, but I have forewarned her that I am not going to be taken in by any scams - not necessarily by her (did not go down well, lol). End of the day I've done my research and happy enough to give it a punt, there's risks but they can rarely be totally eliminated in this game. Upside is that if my intuition is correct and this girl is for real then she'll have turned off most other guys because her stance is likely to be raising red flags by refusing skype, etc. I think it is her personality in this case that is adverse to skype and demeanor - typical direct FSW girl.

As per my post the other day, I find it difficult conversing with girls who's English isn't great - will try shorter sentences when I next get one come up, but found skype a major pain in the arse if girl's English is not great as some of you will remember. Only thing that can save that is if girl has the hots for you, otherwise its just painfully awkward in a real life way. 

[BillyB]

The girl I am going to see I have not skyped with which may sound crazy, but I have forewarned her that I am not going to be taken in by any scams - not necessarily by her (did not go down well, lol).

Extremely bad move to bring up scams before a visit. You decided to visit her and yet you still bring up you're worried about scams. Shows you don't trust her or her ability to be a good hostess when taking care of you in her country. It also shows you failed to identify the person she is before making the decision to visit. Do not even mention what the last lady did to you that you visited. If you're asked if you ever been to the FSU before. You can answer truthfully that you did and that you came looking for love and didn't find it. Say no more even if she asks what kind of woman the last one was.

Your move reminds me of some of the ladies on American dating sites. Some announce they will not respond to men who send the dick pics. Instead of allowing men to be who they really are so they are identified more easily, they are giving the perverts of the world a hint they can get a date with them if they don't send them dick pics. If by chance you are meeting a scammer or gold digger, she will clean up her act to get a date with you.

[msmobyone]

Trench,

I want to be proven wrong - but you are indeed CRAZY going to meet a lass

1/without having a video chat..

2/ Having brought up the scam issue...

Nevertheless, I wish you good luck.

[Trenchcoat]

Do not even mention what the last lady did to you that you visited. If you're asked if you ever been to the FSU before. You can answer truthfully that you did and that you came looking for love and didn't find it. Say no more even if she asks what kind of woman the last one was.

s**t, too late on this one, that bridge has already been crossed. Still something for us all to remember in future I guess. This is all good stuff for us all too know.

I see where you are coming from on the scamming thing, don't let on so she can adjust and not put her foot in it in the communication. I'm hoping it will work the other way and forewarning her & others on my profile will put them off as for all they know the slightest hint of a scam and I'll be off. In any case it will be a learning experience. I am hoping that despite all my potential faux pas it will still come good. I think even messing up a few do's & don't of the minor variety does not necessarily mean an overall complete mess. After all you can do everything right but its still a no go, no chemistry there, etc.

[dragonkid]

Worse thing you can do is be jaded. People think by stating they don't want X, they are being smart, they are not, they are just jaded. picture this

I want serious man, all men who want sex go away, i just want serious relations, goodbye!

VS

i am a fun,and loving girl, ready to give herself to a man that is willing to put his love and faith into me. have a nice day, and goodluck with your search!

[BillyB]

After all you can do everything right but its still a no go, no chemistry there, etc.

You can do everything right with the woman and there could be perfect chemistry but if she thinks you're the kind of man that is going to get ran over by everybody you meet, she'll probably not want to live life with you. Everybody makes mistakes. Some won't dwell on the mistake they made and won't make the same mistake twice. Others keep making the same mistake over and over not understanding what they need to do to get it right and they dwell on it scared it's going to happen again. These women prefer strong, error free men.

Even I judge women based on their mistakes. I've heard women complain every man they met in the past is bad. I begin to question their ability to make good judgements. I don't want to spend my life with a woman who constantly makes bad decisions and/or always blame others for her unhappiness.

[Trenchcoat]

Worse thing you can do is be jaded. People think by stating they don't want X, they are being smart, they are not, they are just jaded. picture this

I want serious man, all men who want sex go away, i just want serious relations, goodbye!

VS

i am a fun,and loving girl, ready to give herself to a man that is willing to put his love and faith into me. have a nice day, and goodluck with your search!

I know the last statement is more positive and in the west we tend towards seeing this as better, not sure about FSU. The first statement is more typically RW I think, direct and too the point, perhaps lacking in tact. However, I tend to be more forgiving of this directness now and in fact willing to give a girl a go in the hope that she will be more genuine and upfront in stating what she wants. Sometimes its kind of funny the bluntness of the statements you receive other times its a little difficult knowing what to do with it.

The second statement sounds better to us but I've had girls come out with all that fluff and now would prefer to just deal with someone who is straight in her approach and appreciates the same.

[Anotherkiwi]

s**t, too late on this one, that bridge has already been crossed. Still something for us all to remember in future I guess. This is all good stuff for us all too know.

Yes, and make sure that you DO remember it! 

I see where you are coming from on the scamming thing, don't let on so she can adjust and not put her foot in it in the communication. I'm hoping it will work the other way and forewarning her & others on my profile will put them off as for all they know the slightest hint of a scam and I'll be off.

Sorry, but you are totally clueless about this, and are going about it in completely the wrong way.  Not only have you totally misunderstood what Billy has written, it appears that you think you can outwit an industry that has been built totally on how easy it is to fleece foreigners who think with their dicks instead of their brains.  Any decent scammer out there will eat you for breakfast.

You are obviously approaching this with the mindset that ALL women, including the one you're going to see, are scammers.  THEY ARE NOT.  It has been written on here before (I don't know how many times) that, if you go looking for scams and scammers, that is what you will find.  If that's all you're thinking about, and it's pretty obvious that IS all you're thinking about, then you will never get the chance to find out if someone is really genuine because you're so worried that they're going to scam you in some way.

If you can't figure out the difference before you go, DON'T GO!